I'm gonna live my life
Like every day's the last
Without a simple good-bye

It all goes by so fastAnd now that you're gone
I can't cry hard enough
No I can't cry hard enough
For you to hear me now

I can't cry hard enough by Bellefire

"I-Is it really you Feli?" Lovino walked to the child cautiously, almost not believing what he sees.

The child looked up to him with distrusting eyes. Of course, a man he just met suddenly approaches him like they were friends before.

"V-ve… Mi dispiace but I don't know you or that 'Feli' you are saying signore…" The child said while stepping backwards, away from the bewildered Lovino.

Lovino stopped his tracks knowing it scared the child. He scanned the child's appearance. His hair was auburn-copper and parted at the center. His hair was also quite long for a boy's and too short for a girl's. His head was adorned by a frilly headband. His eyes were amber and his lashes were long and dark. He had those slightly chubby arms and legs that can be seen from his green maid dress that had a frilly apron tied by a big ribbon at the back. Without knowing the child beforehand, anyone who will see him will mistake "him" for a "her".

Lovino sat on the floor to level the child. He sighed and touched rubbed his nape.

"Hm… May I know your name?"

There was silence. The child was scared and the young man became awkward.

"Don't worry! It's not like I'm going to eat you or some shit." The child looked at him like he was really anxious. Lovino cursed himself for his language.

"Ah, don't be afraid of me. Look, I must know the name of my customer before I cook some pasta for him, si?" He tried to offer the best smile he can manage.

The child looked quite relaxed when he heard the word "pasta". "V-ve… My name is Veneziano! I live at Mr. Austria's house with Ms. Hungary! I clean and I do household chores and I listen to Mr. Austria's music. Mr. Austria was sometimes rude and he punishes me and won't give me pasta but he's really nice and Ms. Hungary always play with me and clean with me and cook with me and give me her old dresses and there was Holy Roman Empire! He was kind of scary at first but he's really nice! And—"

"Whoa there kid. That's quite a lot! I only asked your name not your history." Lovino can't help to snicker when he saw his "little" little brother blush when he realized that he talked too much. He really is Veneziano.

"Sorry… I talked too much didn't I?"

"Heh, that's quite alright."

Veneziano smiled sheepishly at him and he allowed his lips to form a small curve. He was on his way in getting over with it and was starting to cope but he suddenly thought of one thing. His fratellino told everything about his friends at home but he seemed to forget someone.

"Um… Hey. Can I ask you about one thing?" Lovino sighed, unsure if he will going to continue his question.

"Si! But please, no complicated things ve…" Veneziano said, still smiling at the other man.

"Do… Do you have any family members aside from the ones you said? You know, like a grandpa or a brother?" Lovino said bitterly, taking deep breaths after finishing the damn sentence.

"Ve… Well, yes. I have a grandpa but… He... He went off to somewhere I can't reach." Veneziano looked at the floor, not wanting a stranger he just met to see that he was a total crybaby. The latter was mentally cursing himself for asking such things when he really knows what was the true story. All that he wanted is to check why his brother freaking forgot him! Why does he even need to pay the damn price? He was about to ignore the matter but his brother spoke again.

"I have a brother too ve, and he's older than me. We grew up never seeing each other and then when we finally met, he was separated from me again… He was living with big brother Spain so we still meet each other at least once a month but that's alright. I know that he's in good hands and…" Veneziano trailed off.

Lovino looked at him worriedly. "And?"

"And that I somewhat feel that he doesn't need me in his life…" Veneziano finally looked up to him and flashed him a weary smile, almost tired of thinking about his relationship with his brother.

Lovino was taken aback by this. He didn't expect that his brother was thinking like this when they were children. And to add more, this child talks like a disheartened adult more than a little crybaby.

If Feliciano thought about this back then, why didn't I saw it? Why didn't I saw his loneliness through that smiling face?

Am I too insensitive? Am I too selfish?

Maybe I lack affection towards him.

Maybe it was my PRIDE?

I should get to know him better.

"Holy Roman Empire!" Feliciano gasped as he felt a warm streak crossed his face. He wanted to run towards him and hug him tight but he couldn't. He tried to move but his knees felt weak, wavering. Several teardrops dropped on the floor before the kid in black went out of sight. Feliciano sat on the floor, feeling empty.

"Ve… I really don't understand… Is this a dream? Why does it felt so real?"

He was on the verge of crying again when he heard some voices. He hid behind the wall but he allowed his eyes to roam on the people walking at the living room where Holy Roman Empire was earlier ago. There was a young Austria, a young Hungary, and Holy Rome once again. Austria and Hungary looked younger than the present Austria and Hungary he knew. They looked like… The couple who raised him when he was under their care. What in the world was happening here?

"I can't find Italy!" Holy Rome cried out to the other two.

"Calm down Holy Rome! Do you think if you yelled Italy will come out? Of course not. It will only scare the child more." Austria said exasperatingly while adjusting his glasses.

"Well, I think we can just split up? Look, Holy Rome will search for Italy at the woods. Italy likes to pick flowers and to search for bunnies. Maybe Ita's in there. Mr. Austria, you can look at the church. Italy goes there to pray sometimes. I will look for Ita at the town." Hungary told the two men. They agreed and went on their separate ways, hoping they will find Italy. Little they know, Italy was hiding behind a wall, looking at them and was really bewildered.

"I am Italy right? I am who are they looking for… Or I'm not…"

"Am I… In the past? I travelled back in time? Ve, but how? Why?"

He took the chance to roam around his past home. He ascended to the stairs he know oh-so-well and then went to his room, his room which he slept centuries ago. The paintings, the bed, the flooring… It was all nostalgic. He sat on the little bed and touched the soft pillow he once cuddled. It brings out past memories. He really missed his room—or more like he missed everything. He lied on the bed, hugged the pillow, and rolled to the side. He closed his eyes and felt contentment.

The next time he knew, he opened his eyes and saw orange light seeping through the window. He blinked several times and then looked at the ceiling.

"Ve… Where am I?" He looked at his surroundings and then he knew. "Ah, si. I was in my room in the past. Is it afternoon? Ve… My siesta still kicked."

"Who are you?!" A startled woman looked at him. He forgot to lock the door. He looked at her figure and become aware that it was Hungary who was standing before him.

"V-ve Hungary! Don't panic, per favore! I-I'm Italy! Italy Veneziano!" Feliciano said to Hungary.

"I-Ita? No way… Ita can't be you! You're a young man not a little child!" Hungary said disbelievingly.

Feliciano approached Hungary and looked at her in the eyes as if he was saying "please believe me, I'm Italy". Hungary touched his hair and his cheek and it struck her.

"Yes… You are indeed him! Ó Istenem! What happened to you? Why are you like this?"

"Well, I'm from the future and something happened to me there. I really don't know myself so I'm trying to put the pieces together. But as for now, please cooperate with me. Ve, I know doing something in here will change the future and I fear that… So please hide me while I'm doing something." Feliciano explained almost desperate.

"Oh that's okay with me. But how did you know all about that?"

"I saw it in the Sci-fi movies!"

Hungary looked perplexed enough so Feliciano didn't elaborate more. Hungary sighed and smiled before hugging a taller Feliciano.

"I'm so glad that you've grown to be a good looking man. You look like you're in a stable condition and a peaceful surrounding." Hungary said as she released him.

"Si. One thing I can assure you is that all our hopes in this time aren't wasted. The future was bright indeed." Feliciano gave his past "mother figure" a reassuring smile.

They went downstairs, to the living room, and then they heard two voices nearing. It was Holy Rome's and Austria's. Hungary hid Feliciano under the table hoping Austria won't see him.

"Did you find him? I searched every single church in here but to no avail." Austria said worryingly.

"I searched the woods and the garden but I didn't find him." Holy Rome said quite desperately.

"O-oh? Is that so? I went on my way to-to the town he's not there too!" Hungary felt herself tense.

"Hm? Why are you stuttering Hungary?" Austria asked with in a tone of suspicion.

"E-eh? Nothing! I'm just tired perhaps. Why don't you two go to the kitchen? I'll make something for you. Looking for Italy must be very tiring for you too so come, come!" Hungary ushered them to the kitchen to give Feliciano his chance to escape.

Feliciano understood this and grabbed his opportunity and slipped out under the table quietly. He was near to the door when he heard Austria returning to the living room. He panicked and almost freaked out, not knowing what to do, not knowing where to hide, so he hid to the closest thing he saw—the fireplace.

"I'm not craving for food right now. I might rest in here and then set out for search again." Austria said while sitting elegantly on the couch.

"But, at least join Holy Rome in the kitchen. Come on now. Go to the kitchen!" She is really trying her best to not to look suspicious.

"Why are you so worked up on making me go to the kitchen anyway?" Now he was really curious.

Hungary fell silent, Austria is anticipating, and Feliciano was covering his face to not to take in the dust inside the fireplace. He was able to hide himself for a long time if not for a speck of dust that was able to go through his nose.

"A-ah... Achooo!"

Austria was startled and Hungary became anxious. They looked at the fireplace.

"What's that? Is there someone in the fireplace?" Austria started to move towards the fireplace. Hungary tried to stop him but he still curiously motioned to see what's in there. Feliciano thought of something to do.

Austria saw him hiding in the fireplace and he shouted. "Who are you?! Why are you here?"

Feliciano came out of the fireplace with dust and soot in his face and clothing. He tried to remove at least a small amount of grime in his face to look somewhat presentable.

"My name is Feliciano! I'm hired by Little Italy Veneziano to look for this house. Italy went to discuss some matters at the Veneto. Italy's people seem to need assistance so Italy doesn't want to bother you so Italy went there without giving you any notice. Italy said: 'Sorry Mr. Austria, Ms. Hungary, and Holy Rome. Don't worry I'll come back right away when this matter is fixed!" Feliciano hoped that Austria will believe him.

"That's right Austria! T-that's why he's… He's cleaning the fireplace! Didn't you Feliciano?" Hungary tried to cope with his alibi.

Feliciano nodded and gave a nervous smile. Austria looked at the other two and nodded. "Well then at least Italy now knows how to manage his people. That's quite good."

Holy Rome came out of the kitchen hearing Italy's name.

"Italy? Alone? Wouldn't it be better if we're there? Maybe things are hard for Italy there!" Holy Rome said worryingly.

Feliciano and Hungary were out of excuses but then Austria replied.

"That's a good sign for Italy. Italy's starting to be a good govern, caring for the people, don't you think? Besides, we all know Italy is a not-so-weak type. Trust Italy and be ease here."

They all agreed and Feliciano smiled. He didn't know everyone trusted him this much back then.

I didn't know all of these back then…

Maybe I might know more of it while I'm here…

Maybe this was the purpose of this time travelling? To know the secrets of the past? To understand more of my past?

What did I want to know anyway?