"Wow! So thats how you feel about me Candice? I wasn't even breaking up with you but that is starting to look like a great option right now. You knew exactly what you were getting yourself into fucking with me." I could just explode on her just like she just did but I can't find it in my heart to do so. "And you know what the best part about all of this is? No of course you don't because I did it for you. Do you even know how long I've been clear to go home?" I spat. And her whole demeanor changed. "Almost a whole God damn month!"

"Victoria."

"Yea a whole fucking month ago I could have be at home in MY house, in MY bed. Then maybe I wouldn't have to listen to you bitch to me about how I'm such a horrible girlfriend to you, when in fact I try so hard to keep you happy but you don't even give a shit. And by the way I may not look like it but I have feelings too, and what you just said to me really hurt them."

"Oh so now you all of a sudden have feelings!? Because I think you're bullshitting right now. If you really cared about me and had these so called feelings, then you probably would have told me the day you even found that out. Like did you ever even plan on telling me? Like what the hell was your plan with this?"

"Oh no don't try and turn this around on me, I did it for you! Look at me I'm miserable here I fucking hate it here, but I stayed for you Candice. We both know how you get when someone accidentally knocks you down or if I ignore you for more than an hour. And I was just trying to make sure that nothing like that happens again to you. I highly doubt you would even be able to fathom how I felt not knowing if you were okay or not. You don't know what it's like to watch your girlfriend who you love more than anything run off crying and not be able to do anything about it. Then only to find out she ran off and cut herself and almost bled to death while you were chained to a bed. Just the thought of something like that happening and not being able to do anything is heartbreaking to me. And so if you still think that me not telling you I'm free to go makes me a horrible person then fine whatever I don't care anymore."

"Yea you're probably right, but I'm a grown women I'm not a child and I don't always need you to look after me. I think I would have been just fine had you decided to tell me what's going on in your life. Hell it's like I don't even know you at all. What else is there about you that I don't know?"

"Woooow so like I said everything I do for you, you just don't care. Well Candice if you must know I have in fact decided to go home as of yesterday, but it's not like you care about what I do because your head is so far up Torrie's ass you don't think anything I tell you is the truth. But hey she's the new girl we all just meet four days ago so everything she says is the truth and all the things she does is always right!" I smiled sarcastically.

"Are you kidding me right now!?" She asked with venom.

"If there is one truth I've ever told you that would be the one." I spoke nonschlantly.

"You attacked her for Christ sake and you fractured her nose! So are you going to sit and tell me you didn't touch her? Because the proof is in her nose."

"Well actually yes that is what I'm going to tell you, but you know I don't ever do things unless I have a reason. But why should I waste my time telling you when you are just going to take her side." I sighed. It's the truth as of late she seems to not care about my side of the story

"It doesn't matter why there is no good reason for you to do that to her. We just met her days ago and you nailed her in her nose."

"It's funny because all you saw was the surface of the problem, you haven't even seen all the shit she has been doing to me when you aren't around.. You know what forget that I just want you to be on my side again. Not some floozie who we know nothing about. It's like I have to compete to get your attention Candi and it isn't fair." I spoke.

"Would you stop with all the name calling you don't even know her so why are you judging her." She sassed.

"See right there is a prime example of what I'm talking about. You said you don't know me anymore but I don't know who you are anymore either. None to mention I'm trying to tell you about how I've felt as of late and you still don't give a shit. Like I said it always about Torrie with you." I sighed leaning up against the headboard and stared at the ceiling. "And we're back to square one. I should have just stayed single like I intended to. Maybe then I wouldn't be so stressed and full of emotions." I muttered to myself.

"Excuse me!?"

"Candice I think you should go I don't want to talk to you anymore right now. It's pointless trying anymore because each time ends with you taking Torrie's side. Quite frankly I'm starting to think you want her to be your girlfriend more than me, and the longer we go the more of a good idea it sounds." I then sat back up and looked at her. "I gave you everything and it's killing me how much you don't even appreciate it anymore. You aren't the Candice I fell in love with so until you find that Candice I want absolutely nothing to do with you." I spoke honestly.

"Ha I can say the same to you, the Victoria I fell in love with is loving, protecting, and sure as hell wouldn't have said the things you just said." She spat. I just shrugged my shoulders

"Okay well bye goodluck in life!" I smiled pointing to the door.

"I think you'll need it more. I'll be counting the days before you end up in jail again." She spat with venom as she left. Whatever now I don't have to ride this damn emotional rollercoaster. Now I can do what I want and not worry about any bodies feelings.

"Wait Candice!" I yelled after her. A few seconds later she appeared in my door.

"What did you decide you want to apologize?" She spoke with a cocky grin.

"Nope! I just remembered you're wearing my hoodie and I want it back." I spoke simply.

"Fine take your stupid hoodie I don't even want it!" She growled taking it off and forcefully threw it at me then stormed away into the hallway.

"Thanks!" I found it funny because she wasn't wearing a shirt underneath it so that means she is only in her bra and pajama pants. Eh that's not my problem. But I am kinda hungry so I guess I'll head on over to the dinning hall. So I put on my shorts and slippers then headed over there. It wasn't too crowded when I got being it was rather early this morning. But there were enought people there to give me questioning looks. I assume they are all wondering where Candi is.. I guess we really did do a lot of stuff together. But then again it's really none of their business.

I managed to carry my tray to a table by myself. It's kind of harder than I thought being I'm right handed and I had to carry it with my left. My left arm is strong but I'm just not use to using it so it felt weird. But it doesn't matter I don't need help I can do it myself. Another good thing now is I don't have to eat fruit with my breakfast like how Candice always makes me, I can just eat my bagel and not worry about any of that.. But maybe I should at least get an apple because Candi says an apple a day keeps the doctor away, and I don't like Shelby. Then again I should probably eat some fruit because since I'm leaving soon I gotta get back to my regular eating habits that don't involve all this junk food I've been eating.

After I finished eating I went back to my room, I don't feel the need to be in solitary anymore. I'm going home in a few days so who gives a fuck? I know I don't! When I got there the room was empty no sign of Candice what so ever.. Well that was at first until I heard the shower running. I don't care it's my room too and if I want to watch TV here I'll watch TV here. So I climbed into my bed and turned on the TV, and to my luck The Prestige was on. I remember Candi and I watched this movie together the night we first shared a bed together for the night. Ha it was cute because she was so tense but as soon as I wrapped my arms around her she relaxed and cuddled into me. I think it was that day we had our first kiss.. Even though we were covered in cupcake icing it was very interesting. I dunno I think it was just the way she practically melted into my arms. Or maybe it was the look in her eyes after we finished and she looked like she was on cloud nine, like it was something she hasn't felt in a long time. Does that even make sense? I dunno all that doesn't matter anymore because that Candice is gone now.

To be honest I'd be lying if said I didn't miss that Candice a bit. I dunno I just thought she was the cutest thing in the world when we first met and she would smile and blush when I complimented her. Or how she would sometimes tell me the most randomest facts that was completely irrelevant to what we were doing. I now know she only does that when she gets really nervous, or has something to say but she doesn't know how to say it. I'll never forget the day we first met and how innocent she looked sitting in the circle.. Then again I did try to run away later that day. I honestly want to say I rue that day.. but I don't if it wasn't for that day I'm not sure what I'd be doing right now. It was then that I heard the shower turn off and I heard footsteps from the other side of the bathroom door. I can't wait to see what she has to say now.

The door then opened and out she walked in nothing but a bath towel. I just looked at her and then looked back at the TV. I even crossed my arms because she knows when I do that whatever she says to me will go in one ear and out the other. Yea I can be really stubborn sometimes, besides I'd be lying if I said I didn't think she looks sexy fresh out the shower when her hair is wet. So you can only imagine my struggle right now... She then began moving about the room doing whatever she does after the shower. I'm not sure what that is now because we usually shower together and most of the time it takes us an hour or so just to get dressed and I'm not even talking about an outfit. It isn't my fault it's that stupid look she gives me and I can't help but to touch. Then she starts humming to herself some stupid melody and I can't hear the TV, so naturally I turned up the volume. Appearently she didn't like that and showed it by turning off the TV.

"Uh excuse you! I was watching that." I spoke with attitude.

"You'll be fine I'm saving the very few brain cells you have left.. You're gunna need them." She spoke not even turning to look at me.

"Rude." And so I just turned it back on being I have the remote. She then turned it off again. "Okay real talk you see me trying to watch tv. What's your beef?"

"You shouldn't even be here right now. So what I say goes." She said with authority. I don't have time for this.

"You know what you're right. All hail queen Candice!" I said sarcastically getting off the bed and bowing.

"Yea you better recognize." She gloated. I just laughed and began to search for my wallet. I have to make a phone call.

"Ha yea right. The only thing you'll ever be queen of is Queen of the Stupids!" I chuckled. Oh shit I crack myself up! The funniest part is her face right now. And she said TV is bad for you, Gingy has taught me well. "Ahaha whew! Anyhow your royal majesty for tho must go. For I have things I must tend to." And with that I left still laughing. That one never gets old. Anyways I need to call Aksana so that she knows when to come get me.

When I got to the phones I dialed that number I've dialed so many times in the past. After about three rings it picked up.

"Hello?"

"Hey it's me again." I spoke calmly.

"Oh I know Vic you're the only person who says that when they answer the phone." Spoke Aj in a smart tone.

"Okay seriously why are you even picking up Aksana's phone? I want to talk to her not you April, if I wanted to talk to you I would have called your phone not her phone." I ranted. I don't like talking to Aj because she is so mean to me sometimes.

"Well that's too damn bad! Besides Aksana is down stairs making breakfast. We're actually running a little late this morning because we were in the shower and she thought it'd be cute to-"

"Dude! I don't want to know about that! Why is it everytime I talk to you, you have to tell me about your sex life?" I asked seriously. Because she really does tell me about her and Aksana's latest romp like I want to know. Which I really don't want to know.

"Well your cousin is smoking hot and I love her. None to mention she is absolutely beautiful so of course I'm going to brag about how she is legally my wife. Besides she is my kryptonite I can never say no to her when she begs for it or she'll tease me. You would think by now she would have learned not to tease me but I'm starting to think-"

"Okay you can just stop right there and put your wife on the phone." I spoke not trying to hear any of her theories about my little cousin.

"Okay I susppose hold on a second." And with that I heared her walking down the steps and to what I assume the kitchen. "Babe phone for you." I heard her speak.

"Who is it?" I heard Aksana ask.

"Vic."

"Oh okay thanks. I love you!" I then heard a kissing sound followed by a giggle and a light moan. I swear they just don't give a fuck sometimes.

"Mmm I know I love you too." I heard Aj respond followed by more kissing sounds.

"Good. But you better go finish getting ready" Then there was another kiss. "for work you're already late enough as it is."

"Well maybe if you weren't so sexy I wouldn't always get so distracted by your charm." Purred Aj. Then I heard more kissing and a light moan.

"Hey you two at least hang up the phone if your going to do that. I don't want to hear that." I nagged hoping they will hear me.

"Oh shit I forgot she was on the phone. Look what you do to me.." I heard Aksana purr and then Aj giggle.

"Okay fine maybe next time I'll put on pants, but you are the one cooking in nothing but lingerie, heels, and an apron." Aj said matter of factly. I told you they literally just don't care. Like I bet if they could they'd make love in the middle of a busy shopping center on Black Friday.

"Are you complaining?"

"No never I'd die if I couldn't see your beautiful body. I would prefer it if you.. wore nothing at all." I heard Aj say in a sultry voice and a sudden yelp from Aksana. Listening to how happy they are together is kind of bumming me out a bit. Don't get me wrong I think Aj and Aksana are perfect for each other. Aj makes Aksana happy and vice versa so that's all that really matters to me. It's just that it reminds me of when they came to visit and they met Candice. And how they just accepted her into our family, hell I guess they realized how happy she made me. So listening to them doing whatever it is they do makes me wonder what life would have been like for me and Candi after we both got out of here. I don't really like having to break habits when I'm use to doing things a certain way, so it's going to be weird doing things without Candi constantly over my shoulder making sure I don't do anything I shouldn't be doing. Yea I'm old enough to know right from wrong and I don't need anyone to tell me, but I'm so use to her telling me what to do it's like I expect her to say something whenever I do something that could end badly. Or maybe it's the way she would shiver slightly when I whispered in her ear, and the way she would grab on to me at night when she had a nightmare. She had those every now and then, I never bothered to ask what happened because after she told me about Ryan everything seemed to make sense or become obvious. So she'd sometimes wiggle in my arms and whimper which would wake me up, then I'd wake her up and just hold her as she cried. I never asked about the dream because I know she knows she's safe in my arms and there is no need to fear because I'll protect her no matter what. Also because sometimes things are just better left unsaid.

"Vic? Vic? Hello are you still there?" I heard Aksana speak bringing me out of my thoughts.

"Wha? No I'm here. Sorry I just got lost in my thoughts anyways what did you want?" I asked.

"Well I dunno you called me."

"Uh right I forgot. Well Shelby says I can finally go home now." I murmmered.

"Well that's awesome Vic I'm so proud of you! What day?" She spoke excitedly.

"Umm sometime after the next few days I think."

"Are you okay you don't seem excited?" She asked in a worried tone.

"That's because I'm not Sana. In fact the past four days have been hell. And I think I'm heartbroken." I spoke honestly.

"Awe Vic what happened?"

"A fucking blonde bimbo is what happened. She literally managed to ruin my life in her first four days here. And somehow managed to practically ruin Candice and I's relationship. We just got into a big fight and.. I think we broke up I'm not sure. So really I guess I need someone to talk to." I said in a monotone.

"Wait I thought you and Candice were happy together?"

"We were! But then the fucking new chick decides to try and steal me from Candi and then she would try and come on to me. You know how I feel about cheating in a realationships, so naturally I just said no thanks I'm taken but she was aggressive and it always ended with me defending myself. And of course that's the only part Candice sees so she thinks I'm just beating on the new girl for no reason. And when ever I try to explain my side she just doesn't want to hear it.."

"Oh Vic." She cooed.

"She just keeps taking her side and it's like I gotta fight for her attention." I spoke in a shaky voice. I want to cry but my pride won't let me do it. "I don't know what to do. I can't just let her go she means so much to me. Damn it I love her but she's being such a jerk to me."

"Wow Vic yeah she has you whipped. I mean you got a case of love sickness and you got it bad. But did you try explaining everything that happened to her in detail?"

"I've tried but she still won't believe me and you know me I don't just go around making shit up for the giggles. I've never once gave her a reason to never believe what I say is true and now all of a sudden everything I tell her is a lie apparently."

"I know Vic but just like everybody else would she's just going by what she saw. This new chick must be some character if she managed to get you to almost cry."

"I'm not going to cry I'm not a whimp." I said seriously. Victoria doesn't cry.

"Why do you have to do that? Kits okay we all cry it's natural. Maybe if you let it out every once in a while you wouldn't have so many pent up emotions." She said simply. She might be right but I'll never know for sure if it's true.

"... Shit you're right I love her so much it hurts. Why does love hurt so bad but yet feel so good?"

"We'll if it were easy it wouldn't feel good in the end if you didn't have to fight for what you have. There's always going to be bad in the good, and good in the bad it's up to you to find the good in bad situations and not let the bad overtake the good." That was deep.. So I just sat and let it sink in. She's right I let rain clouds into our paradise and I just have to get rid of them so it will be sunny in paradise again.

"How do you and Aj manage to stay so positive all the time?" They fight but it never escalates to something extreme.

"Well we share a lot of common interest it's actually kind of weird. But when one doesn't like something the other did we just talk it out and try to find middle ground. But really at the end of the day we both know I need her just like she needs me, and with out the other we're nothing." She said cooly.

"Don't forget to tell her the other reason why we got Devo." I heard in the background followed by a bark.

"Am I on speaker?" I swear it's if you call one you talk to both of them.

"Yea." Aksana responded

"Yea it's nice to know you actually have emotions!" Damn Aj will still make fun of me even when I'm depressed.

"Thanks April." I said dripping with sarcasm.

"Anyways the other reason we got Devo is so that he is a constant reminder of our love for each other." Said Aksana.

"Yea but that's not the whole reason!" I heard Aj chime

"I know but do you really want to tell her that part being she's kinda bummed out?" Reasoned Aksana.

"Ha fine I'll tell her then! Gimme this please." I then heard what I assume Aj grabbing the phone from Aksana. "You see Aksana is a fucking genius for real like she has sone really good ideas sometimes seriously. But the best ideas are right after she comes down off a high I caused her. So one day when I did that she suggested we get a dog, and me being the fool I am for her I agreed. And so the next day we probably drove to ten different pet stores where they sell dogs. Then we got to this one pet store and it was late in the night line nine-ish and I just wanted to go home, but she insisted that this store was the store. So we are looking at all the puppies and just we're about to leave she spots a little brown thing in one of the cages near the back of the store, and she fell in love with it. I was just like no because it was rolling around in it's poo, but she insisted she have it. So whatever my Aksana want my Aksana gets, the worker people washed him off and gave him to us. On the ride home he peed on me and I was so close to taking him back to the store, but again she insisted that it was an accident because he was just a baby."

"See even he knew you're a jerk." I laughed.

"Anyways the next few months consisted of him using the bathroom in the house and me wanting to take him back to the store. Then she would get mad at me for getting mad at him and then go lock herself in the bedroom with him. Then I would make it up to her which ended up in a very passionate love making. And it happened almost every other day to the point where I found myself getting mad at him just because so she'll love me again afterwards. Then she eventually caught on and realized I would do anything for her love and she loved me because I did that." Even though I can't stand Aj sometimes I still love her like a little sister. She has her moments when she helps me see the logic to things.

"Using an innocent dog just to seduce my cousin.. Tisk Tisk April I expected more from you." I chastised.

"Whatever it worked. And so now whenever we are mad at each other Devo somehow always knows and he'll sit on one of our laps reminding us that if it weren't for him our love wouldn't be as strong as it is now." Aj declared. I can tell just by how she explained that she really loves Aksana.

"That's cute I guess but I still miss my Candi." I pouted. I know it only happened about two hours ago but I feel so bad about what I said to her. I didn't mean all of it. I miss her.

"Yea love does that to ya. Why do you think I'm so hesitant to go to work in the morning?" Aj spoke.

"Thanks for reminding me April. You need to go because you are beyond late." I heard Aksana say

"What does it matter I'm my own boss. I can't get fired!" Aj protested.

"Being late doesn't set a good example for your employees. Your lunch is in the fridge and your briefcase is already in the car." Haha Aksana has always been the most organized out of the three of us.

"Okay so then what's the rush?!"

"April if you don't get your ass in the car and to work!" Aksana scolded.

"Make me!"

"Vic I'm going to have to talk to you later I gotta take care of this nutjob here. But just tell her exactly what you told us and how you feel. And if it doesn't work that's her loss. Okay I love you bye!" And with that she hung up the phone. They are so adorable sometimes.

I'm not sure what to do now because I want to go talk to her but I'm still mad at her. I guess I'll just go sit outside and gather my thoughts. I'm not sure what I want anymore.

Oh no there are clouds in Victoria and Candice's paradise, and that storm is raging on. I guess that's what happens when two big egos collide when they are just ment to live in harmony together. Well damn looks like Torrie got what she wanted. Then Vic trying to act like she doesn't even care but she knows she needs Candi, it makes me tear up a bit. ): No Me Gusta! Ich liebe nichts. I dunno pardon my spelling I haven't had German in four years, and Spanish in five. Yea I know some German I took three semesters worth I bet you didn't know that. But I forgot most of it but when I see it written I can read it somewhat, it's mostly the basics. But hey I still know how to ask to use the bathroom and tell people I'm hungry so thats a win! :D I know who gives a shit? Whatever I do what I want! -Joz #FuckItup