If You Like
Usually the Mum's gave Callie and Thomas the final feeding of the evening, putting them to sleep and gently tucking them into their respective cots. Tonight they left it to the boys and with an ear cocked for sounds of difficulty, retired to their room to talk more about the house. Caroline sat on the edge of the tub watching Kate remove her makeup.
Kate glanced at Caroline, knowing she was waiting for her to be ready to talk. "I remember the first time we walked into this flat. It seemed so enormous, far more than I thought we needed." Stopping to turn and lean against the basin she looked at Caroline, "Tonight when we came home I realized how cramped we've become here. Two grown boys besides you and me, two babies plus all the things that go along with caring for them." Grinning, "And since the babies, Laurence is constantly bringing his friends home to show off the little ones. I love it but it can get… crowded from time to time."
Continuing to regard a smiling Caroline, "I am pleased that both of your boys are happy enough in their home to think they want to live with us when they really wouldn't have to. I love both of them. Laurence has been a darling with the babies. I don't know what I would have done without him sometimes, you know that. He and I have actually become closer than I would have thought possible six months ago." Returning to her task, "I was surprised a little by Will saying that he was thinking of coming back here after uni. Do you really think they'll both live with us?"
"Well, not forever. But I think they will for a few years, if we have space for them." Smiling her ever so slightly crooked smile, "Thanks to you for making it such a happy home."
"That has been a joint effort. It wouldn't have worked without everyone trying."
"Yes, but you've made it very easy for the lot of us." Standing to lean against Kate, "Are you sure it isn't going to be too much for you to go back to work, even part time?"
Seeing Caroline's genuine concern for her, Kate smiled. "No, you're making it very easy for me. We have lots of help with the babies. I think we'll all be fine." Then, "Are you worried about it?"
"Nooo. I just don't want you to be overwhelmed." Tenderly, "All I ever wanted was for you to enjoy this time when they're little. I know you've looked forward to it for years. I only want you to be happy."
Running the backs of her fingers down the sides of Caroline's face, "I am happy. You make me happy Caroline. Thank you for making it possible not only to be able to be home with them but for Roger who gets up with them at night giving me the rest I need to really enjoy them everyday." Then impishly, "And enjoy you and your misguided attempts at a little 'afternoon delight'."
"Misguided?!" Gyrating her hips against Kate's, "Tsk, tsk, tsk. Mrs. McKenzie-Elliot you are going to pay for that." Closing in and just barely refraining from a kiss, Caroline pulled them both upright, "but first, I want to know if you like the house. We haven't even talked about that."
Turning Caroline to face the mirror and perching on the tub, "Yes. I think I do. I like the lines of the house, inside and out. I like the large windows and the big open plan for the main rooms. That would make it seem like home right away, we've gotten so used to that here. I like the little courtyard right off the back corner, it would be perfect for Callie and Thomas when they get to toddling.
The garden has lots of potential." Catching Caroline's eye, I know your green thumb has been missing the chance to get into the soil. And having three strapping young men around the place would help get that into shape fairly quickly. I like that the boys could have their bedrooms upstairs and we could be downstairs, close to the little ones," raising an eyebrow, "with our own private balcony."
Coming to stand next to Caroline as she towels her face, "And I love that you're thinking about taking care of our parents." Taking a corner of the towel to dry soap bubbles clinging to the blonde hairline, "As usual, you are several jumps ahead of me in planning how to take care of everyone. I do love you. So much."
"So, is that…?"
Kate reared back a little to look Caroline full in the face. With her head cocked and an eyebrow quirked, she said gently but firmly, "Is that us beginning the discussion of where to live once our lease is up here? Yes. It is."
Her face falling as she realized that Kate was not ready to commit to this house, "So then…" Caroline faltered.
Picking it up, "So then, we look around and see what else is available and make a comparison to the house we saw this afternoon."
"Well, but I…"
Continuing reasonably, "I realize now that you've been doing some research and looking around for us. This is a big decision, Caroline. We'll want both of us to be considering all of the options so we can talk about it and come to the best decision for our family, won't we?"
With dismay, "Oh, Kate. I've done it again, haven't I? Presented you with a result rather than share the process with you." Caroline felt her stomach tighten at the thought of how wrong she had gotten it yet again. "Kate. I'm so sorry. I just…" Faltering again as she saw how big this would be to Kate. Would she be angry that she'd been excluded? Why hadn't she thought of this from Kate's point of view?
Seeing regret and consternation on the features that had been so happy and excited until just now, Kate felt a little like the Grinch who had stolen Christmas but this was too important to their future to overlook. She didn't want to do this standing awkwardly in the bathroom under those glaring lights. Taking Caroline's hand she led her into the bedroom which was lighted by the bedside lamps. Sitting on the edge of the bed, Kate curled one leg in front of her so she could face Caroline who mirrored her.
Proceeding cautiously because this topic had the power to unbalance them, "I know in the past this was your role. But now, with us, it can't be that way anymore, Caroline. When you do this it makes me feel as if you don't value my judgment, my point of view. Logically, I know that isn't true but that's how it feels." Seeing a chastened Caroline listening carefully, Kate continued more gently, "You do know that we will be closer and grow stronger if we do these things together, right?"
In a small voice, "I got it wrong. Again. I am sorry, Kate." Still a little defensively, "I just wanted to surprise you."
Relenting, "I do appreciate a good surprise Caroline but on something like this it will be better if we go through the process together. It's too big for me to just be as excited as you over this house with nothing else to compare it to. You do understand that, don't you?
"So, are you cross?"
Considering, "Part of me was. For a while. But, no not really, as long as we agree that on the big things like where we will live and on big purchases we need to be in the process together. Even at the expense of a surprise." Watching the blue eyes resume their confidence again, "Agreed?"
"Yes, agreed. It won't happen again." Then with the timid smile that always did Kate in, "So, am I forgiven?"
Feigning reluctance to show yet how forgiven she was, "Well… If you were to sit on my lap again like you did this afternoon, I might be willing to forgive you."
The sparkle returning to blue eyes, Caroline's voice became sultry, "Oh, I think that might be arranged." With an innocent raise of her eyebrows, "So, the whole afternoon hasn't been a waste?"
Torn between eyeing the tempting lips and the captivating eyes, Kate replied somewhat distractedly, "Not entirely. I did find your enthusiasm and excitement… rather contagious."
Standing, Caroline drew Kate to her feet. Pulling the top over Kate's head and letting her gaze travel down to full rounded breasts, her fingers and eyes going back to trace the lines and hollows of the delicate shoulders before trailing once more to run just beneath the edge of a lacy bra. Her breathing shallow, Caroline raised her face for a savory kiss, reawakening what had been interrupted in the afternoon.
Caroline's hands had slipped behind Kate as they kissed, freeing her from her restraint, pulling the garment from her shoulders and dropping it to the floor she let her hands cradle the heaviness.
Head back, eyes closed, fingers tucked into Caroline's waistband for balance, Kate felt the feather light kisses as Caroline's lips moved across her shoulders and neck before finding her mouth again. Unfastening Caroline's jeans she let her hands slide into the hollows just in front of her hips, inside the knickers to slowly ease the clothing down over fullness, letting her hands slip to the rear to cup luscious flesh. She felt Caroline's hips tilt into her. Bending her head, lips to Caroline's ear asking softly, "Are you going to sit on my lap tonight? The way you did this afternoon?" Kate felt Caroline's smile against her cheek.
"If you like."
Gliding her hands up and up, riding the curve at the waist, over the ripple of ribs to unclasp Caroline's bra, pulling it and the top over her head to see the rise and fall of translucent skin. Dropping the clothing and easing the upraised hands onto her shoulders, Kate bent to lower the jeans far enough for glorious spotted legs to step out, taking in that sight before she pressed a self controlled kiss between tempting breasts, then made quick work of shedding the rest of her own clothing with a little help from Caroline. Kate watched raptly as the resplendent body made its way to the center of the bed.
They'd been hyper-aware of one another since the kiss that a tip-toed Caroline had placed behind Kate's ear that afternoon. Now holding out her arms to Kate as she reclined, Caroline's eyes never left the lithe loveliness that followed her, watched it slink up her body, full rounded breasts grazing her skin until at last Kate lowered herself onto Caroline. Waves of arousal radiated through bodies, which had been building toward this moment. Arms, which had lightly received Kate, now splayed on the bed. She luxuriated in the warmth and weight of Kate's deliberate undulation against her. Caroline couldn't stop herself writhing in response. Blazing eyes on the hovering face she breathed, "Oh, Kate."
Kate's kisses lapped their way from lips to throat, breast to breast and eventually back to her mouth, Caroline's sudden intakes of breath and groans of pleasure enhancing her own enjoyment. At length, moving to seat herself against the padded headboard, drawing Caroline after her, Kate coaxed softly, "Come. Sit on my lap." Pupils dilating at the sight of Caroline rising to an elbow, "The way you did before."
Swallowing at the sight of a tousle headed Kate and the brown eyes that were devouring her body, Caroline complied. "I didn't think you liked that so much, earlier."
Breathing fast and shallow now, tone distracted, "Time and place, Caroline. Time and place."
The sight of Caroline rising to straddle her knees mesmerized Kate. The changing shape of cinnamon spotted breasts as she moved captivated her. Kate watched as Caroline paused, intent blue eyes focused on her. Advancing slowly Caroline closed the distance between them, breath quickening, as they missed no detail of the other. Caroline snugged her heat against Kate's abdomen once again. She heard the small cry it elicited and moaned softly at this sound and the sensation of contact.
No longer able to view the breasts that now rode over hers Kate's face had risen, following the bright head above hers. Raising hands that had rested lightly on speckled shoulders to smooth back white blonde tresses for a better view of the mouth now opening with desire as it closed in on hers. Warm moist kisses, slow and soft that further charged them.
They stilled for the moment, experiencing their acute reactivity to one another. It happened like this sometimes. Infrequently enough that they were awed anew and tacitly honored it by cherishing this heightened sensitivity to one another.
Kate's arms had lightly encircled the woman on her lap as they became lost in the depths of one another's eyes, breathing in one another's essence, auditing one another's breathing, each aware of the restraint in the body against hers. Finally Kate let her face reach for the kiss she needed. It was another soft sensuous kiss that electrified them further, a kiss demanding an escalating series of increasingly fervent kisses. At last they parted for breath and to regain their now tenuous hold on control.
Caroline resumed her almost imperceptible pulsing against Kate, conscious of the full breasts against her as her own breasts rested on Kate's. She moved her bent knees further apart to maximize her contact with Kate as she watched molten brown eyes widen.
Missing no nuance of this deepening of sensation Kate deliberately breathed through the effect it was having on her. She saw the play of a smile on Caroline's face in satisfaction at her response. She also noted the effort required by Caroline who was trying to manage her own arousal. Caressing hands had drifted down to barely rest on Caroline's hips. Sliding again her fingers found the dark crevasse. Following it down and around to the place where all flesh begins to funnel inward, lingering there, fingering lightly, relishing the gasp then moans and writhing this produced. Kate's upraised face took in Caroline's expression of total absorption in sensation. Then she found it necessary to breath through this overload of her own senses, yet again.
In a trembling series of escalating pleas, "Ka-a-te, Ka-aa-te. Touch me, Kate. Please."
Kate allowed her fingers to delve into slippery wetness, then trace the full length of firm curving ridges of inner labia producing whimpers that turn to mere breathy sounds, closing blue eyes from view. Continuing this practice to great effect Kate becomes aware that Caroline is about to orgasm and she wants desperately to be inside her for this. Long agile fingers glide in, delighting in the feel of her but almost losing rule of herself at the surprised cry from Caroline.
Caroline gives herself to the orgasm that racks her body, barely mindful enough of time and place to strangle her cry, she presses her mouth to the side of Kate's face as she continues to drive against skillful fingers.
Kate's free arm held Caroline to her body. As she finally quieted, Caroline began to relax into Kate giving her a sense of power at bringing this self-controlled woman to such an inert state. Kate squirmed to feel the friction of the increased amount of skin touching skin now that Caroline had melted into her. Every muscle in her own body still taut with her imminent need Kate's mouth kissed its urgent way up the salty throat, across the slack jawed cheek to find the mouth that she knew would respond to her.
Caroline roused to the fervor of Kate's demanding body and pulled her in, her own body recalibrating to the overt sexuality of the vibrant woman that she could never have enough of. Rising she responded to Kate's despairing gasp at the loss of body contact with a husky, "On your knees." Admiring blue eyes drank in the sight of molten grace and beauty flowing upward to meld into her once again. Each woman reveling at the renewal of their embrace, they pressed together hands securing them to one another.
Caroline's lips at Kate's ear, "Slow or fast?"
A moan escaped the curved lips, "I've been waiting for you all afternoon, Caroline. I think that's slow enough." Covering the lips now smiling smugly in satisfaction at this admission, Kate demonstrated the extent of her need. Her breathing very shallow, Kate reared back to put herself into the light of blue eyes, "You know how I need you to touch me." Bodies offset just enough to give access; Caroline fingered a whimpering Kate, no longer able to contain her response. Under Caroline's knowing touch, Kate was soon arching and strangling her own cries from within Caroline's loving arm. Cupping a hand behind Kate's head Caroline tenderly kissed a weakened Kate now sagging against her.
After hours of building tension, of waiting, eyes on the other, the intimacy of discussing their future, these two continued to move together. Eyes inciting lust, touching, tasting, reveling in their closeness until totally spent they rested in one another's arms, panting and smiling, still caressing with faces and hands, chuckling softly in pure pleasure as they waited for breath to return to their bodies.
An ear lobe was pulled from her mouth as Kate turned to lap again at the cinnamon spots of her neck, "Kaa-te," Caroline laughed deep in her throat, "I'm never going to calm down if you keep doing that."
Between laps, "I don't want you calm, I want you squirming and breathless in my arms all night."
Twisting her neck to give better access, "Inside I'm always squirming and breathless for you. You know that, don't you?" Breathing out a long vowel sound as Kate's teeth gently tested the density of the large muscle running along her neck. Continuing when she was able, "You know that's why I come home to find you. To get as close as I can, even when there isn't time. Even when we won't be alone for more than a few minutes."
Caroline's mind compared the long drab years of mundane existence with her current state of happiness. Then, the only bright spots had been her boys. Now she wanted to be aware of how good life was, moment by moment. She made a conscious effort never to let it become routine. Kate filled her with joy and their life together was soul satisfying. All four of her children were bright spots in her life but they paled in comparison to the brilliance of the love she shared with Kate.
Tightening her arms, "You're my drug, Kate, my addiction. I have to have you. If you turned away from me now, I'd stalk you. I'd haunt you until you took me back."
Raising her face to Caroline's, "I'm never turning away from you Caroline. You're the air that I breathe, I can't live without you."
"The babies-"
"Won't be babies very long. But I'll need you forever…" kissing Caroline passionately but with the heat dissipated for now."
They lay holding one another desperately close as if they were about to be torn apart, listening to the sounds of their household, muted through the thick walls of the old building that had sheltered them through so much living for over seven months. "I'll need you forever."
THE END OF DESIGNING THE FUTURE
I began last spring to tap out words on the screen in an effort to reconcile in my mind what had happened between Caroline and Kate. I had no idea that this story laid beneath the surface of that. Or that it would go 62 chapters and 200,000 words. It has been an amazing journey of discovery for me. Your kind comments and encouragement were something I didn't anticipate. You've touched me and made me laugh, sometimes with uproarious delight by your reactions to what I thought I had written. I feel as if I have 'met' some of the nicest people in the world. Thank you to each one of you who have taken this journey with me. On to Series 3 of Last Tango in Halifax, oh Sally, what do you have in store for us now?