Season Three: Episode 5 -Too Far Gone- End it All
A/N- At the time it was written, this was the voting result. Warning: mature content and sensitive topics being explored here, this chapter is very dark, (maybe TWD comic book worthy dark) so, if we offend anyone with these issues, we apologize in advance. Enjoy the rest of the climax.
Thunder clashed as the rain beat against the glass windows around them...
Hazen let out a long drawn out sigh, loud enough for her to hear him. She saw his eyes begin to water, but they did not yield tears. The older teen stepped towards Clementine as calmly since she's known him, slowly but meticulously.
Clem stood up as he approached her, hands shaking as to what to do. And Hazen spoke to her. "You know what you're feeling right now...?"
The little girl decided to stay silent, not even giving him an answer on what she was feeling at that moment.
"...What you're feeling right now... is the same as what I've been feeling, every... single... day." He stopped in front of her, not moving a muscle now. Not exactly staring at the twelve year old but nothing really in particular. Hazen then addressed her.
"What are we supposed to do now, Clementine?" His words weirdly echoed throughout the lantern room.
A mixture of emotions were swirling around within the little girl like a hurricane, but the one thing that she did feel that she knew she could identify was... pure fear.
Her breathe hitched as she met Hazen's gaze.
[Shoot Hazen]
[Plead For AJ]
Whether it was survival instinct, justice, or any kind of emotion, Clementine had enough. She remembered the first time she encountered Hazen, grieving for his lost loved one, just waiting for the walkers to find him and be eaten alive, she had saved his life... and now...
She had to end it.
Clem pulled her pistol out from behind her back and pointed the barrel at the older teen's chest. As soon as she did that however, Hazen's face contorted like that of a beast that had just awoken within him. Another clap of loud thunder echoed throughout the land as Clem pulled the trigger- only to have her target grab the hand she held it with, and quickly aim her gun upward!
*BANG!*
The bullet Clementine had fired was redirected by Hazen, and it was embedded into the ceiling above them. But before Clem could even react, a hard brutal fist landed and made contact with her nose. "AHH!" The force of Hazen's punch, not a slap like she was used to, but a punch knocked her back and onto the floor. She was enough outside so that only her head was getting rained on, but from the shoulders down she was dry.
Clem reeled in pain as she felt cold rain hit her face, and the warm blood pour out of nose. She covered it with her hand as she sat up on her other elbow to see Hazen aim her own gun at her. She flinched when she heard a *click* signaling that there was no more ammo left in it. Clem sobbed. "Hazen..."
The young man tossed her gun aside, useless to him right now at the moment, and his dark gaze fell onto the little girl in front of her. "You're trying to kill me too, huh? ...I understand why you did that..." His voice was low and it was different, like he was a completely different person. She was scared, scared for her life. "...I tried so hard..." He paused, and he took another step towards her. In turn, Clem crawled backwards. "...I tried so hard to convince myself..." He then pulled out his knife and it appeared that he was examining his own reflection in the blade. "...but I am."
Little red blood drops continued to leak out of her nose and onto her leather jacket as Clem's eyes widened when she got back up on her feet. Ready to find an opening to escape, like a little rabbit escaping the predator. "Please... Hazen, you don't have to do this!"
(?) Hazen will remember that.
"I lied to you Clementine." The older teen looked at her as he revealed the truth to her. "I didn't stop the men with knives who killed and ate those people because..." He cried out as he clutched the knife in his hand tightly. "BECAUSE I WAS ONE OF THEM!"
Clem stood there shocked, scared, and abhorred. The thought of his actions now revolted her. His rant went on however. "DO YOU KNOW WHAT I DID WITH THESE HANDS CLEMENTINE?!" Hazen slapped himself in the face with his free hand several times before he continued. "DO YOU KNOW WHAT I FUCKING DID?!"
The twelve year old watched as she saw her former friend and ally break down in front of her. All the emotional baggage he was carrying, all the guilt, all the agony was crashing down on him at once after being repressed for so long. Hazen was transforming in front of her, he really was... the quiet young man that she danced for fun with him in that ballroom, the person she trusted enough to hold and care for AJ, the person that had saved her life at least twice...
He wasn't there anymore, he was... Too far gone, too far to save.
Hazen's POV.
The cold was unyielding, every single day it just got colder and colder, if it wasn't the frost bite that got you, it was the hypothermia that killed you. The soldiers abandoned us in these pits, they stood high on their walls, and they didn't give a shit about us anymore...
They were more worried about themselves surviving this winter, so they decided to let us freeze. Who said hell was a fiery pit in the center of the earth? No... hell was cold.
My sister sat beside me curled up in a ball under a thin blue blanket, shivering with every breathe she took. I had to keep her warm, nothing else mattered to me than keeping her alive. "You warm enough?" What a stupid question, of course she wasn't.
But my sis was a saint. "I'm fine Hazy..." She smiled at me. "That's the tenth time you asked me today."
I tried my best at a joke. "I thought it was more times than that." I earned a loving chuckle outta her. Success. "I'm just worried."
"I know you are." She replied curtly after another shiver. "But you should worry more about Malachi, please don't make him angry like yesterday or he might choose us next."
"That's not going to happen. I won't let that happen." The thought of him made me want to vomit, the things he did, mercilessly and without remorse, the only reason everyone followed him was that he was keeping everyone alive down here... well not everyone. We were not going to be killed and cooked by that monster. "I promise."
She shook her head at me. "You can't promise that, not with the way things are..." She decided to change the subject before we thought more on the horrible topic. "Go see if you can find a blanket for yourself. You must be freezing."
I agreed and stood up on my two feet. "If I find another one, it's going straight to you." I wasn't that cold compared to her, I could deal with it.
"What a gentleman you still are." She smirked at me with a playful nudge of my leg. "I don't know how I could survive without you."
As I left our corner of the indoor courtyard we stayed at, I told her. "As long as we have each other, it'll be fine. I'll be back in a minute." She contently nodded at me.
I had to be careful walking among some of these men. If I just gave them a reason to bring their attention to me, I was dead. If I'd know this is what we would be reduced to when those biters started walking, I would've never stepped into this hellhole. Fuck this place, but then again it did have kind folks in here too. People like us, people that were still normal in my eyes.
And yet, as I walked down one of the long corridors which led to the outside courtyard, I was met with the last person I wanted to see: Malachi. I would never forget his face, his smug expression, his shaved head and droopy mustache. He smirked when he spotted me, and stood in my way. "I've been looking for you boy."
I had to respect the man, otherwise I'd get hurt, or my sister would get hurt. It scared me though that he was specifically looking for me. "What for... sir?"
Malachi rubbed his hands together so that he could get some warmth from the friction. "It's time for your initiation young man. I need strong boys like you to be on my side. I've been watching you, and I think you'd make a perfect addition to my little 'club' ."
Initiation? Oh hell no, I knew exactly what he was getting. I was going to have no part of it. "No thank you sir, I need to-"
"I wasn't fuckin' asking boy!" He seethed as he cut me off when he elbowed me and pinned me against the wall. Oh god no... I knew what he was going to do next. His nasty hot breathe hissed onto my numb face, and I held my breathe and froze as he muttered into my ear. "Just a taste..."
His thick wet tongue licked me across and into my ear as he traveled from there to my cheek and ended on my nose. I gagged and fought back the urge to cry out for help, I was powerless against him. "You taste good boy..."
His grip on me slackened and before I knew it, he used his free arm to punch me across the face and my vision went black...
What felt like moments later, I opened my eyes, and all I heard was yelling, crying, screaming... the yelling of Malachi and his men, the crying from a a baby, and the screaming from its mother. "NO! PLEASE! DON'T DO THIS!"
"Get up! Get the fuck up!" One man violently grabbed me by my arm and placed me on my feet. I was still in a daze but I gasped as I watched Malachi stab an old man to death who was holding his own arm! What the fuck?! The old man fell dead with one last stab to the back of his head as two of Malachi's men dragged the body outta sight. Then the now bloodied Malachi turned to face me, and tossed me his knife to which I caught.
"You see?!" He referred to the dead old man's vain deed. "That's what you get for playing the stupid hero! Ya'll hear me?!" Malachi then looked to me. "Kill that woman, make it quick."
"Give me back my baby please! Don't take her from me! Please! PLEASE!" The mother begged in vain as another man ripped the infant from her arms. She was kneeling in front of me, looked up at me with tear-stained eyes. "Please..." She prayed. "Please don't..."
"Come on! Kill her already, you really want to draw this out boy?" Malachi ordered me. "It'll be a lot worse if you do that."
I solemnly declared to him. "No."
Fuck you. I tossed the knife on the ground, it clacked against the floor, and the mother was beside herself. "Thank you, tha-!"
*click*
I looked up to see Malachi, pointing a fucking gun on me. Where in the hell did he get that?! None of us had guns down here. "Pick it up." He stated, I refused still as I just stared at him. "PICK IT UP!" No, I wouldn't. "PICK IT UP OR I WILL KILL YOU AND THAT WHORE SISTER OF YOURS!"
I was infuriated, I wanted to kill him more than anything right now. But he had a gun and I would be shot dead before the five guys with knives would stab me to death too.
I had no choice... no, I did, but I knew this was the wrong choice.
I picked up the knife off the ground, never taking my eyes off that fucker Malachi. The men were murmuring to one another but they were still on their toes, ready in case I acted out somehow. I turned to face the crying woman. "Don't... please. Don't do this, in the name of god don't do this!"
The men were chanting behind me, then it turned into incoherent shouting. Everyone was just too fucking loud, screaming now! Screaming! Stop screaming at me! I can't fucking hear myself! Don't make me do this!
"KILL HER RIGHT NOW!, DO IT OR YOU WILL DIE! NOW! KILL HER RIGHT NOW! DO IT! DO IT!" I felt the barrel of his gun against my temple. I felt the prick of a knife behind me on my back. "KILLHERDOITNOW!" It went on for what felt like an eternity... and suddenly, I just let go of something...
No...
I let go of everything.
(o) Kill the mother.
"AAHHHHHHHHHH!" I cried and I cried after I stabbed the mother seven times. But Malachi and his men praised me, and yet still that night I knew something broke inside me.
Over and over... it never stopped. I could never... forgive myself, and from then on... I could never fully control myself. Like a cancer infecting my mind, I slipped into darkness too many times, I never wanted any of it, I never fucking wanted any of this! I'm so sorry!
Even after all my effort to resist, to suppress these violent urges, I still became a monster... I am a monster.
"Listen to me Hazen!" Clementine shouted at the hysterical teen in front of her. But before she continued she looked down at her hand, and saw that it was completely covered in blood from her nose. Clem looked back up at him. "You know me! It's me, Clementine!"
Whatever she might have said, it was like a switch, because Hazen's eyes flared with the glint of insanity. He charged at her full speed as his voice boomed at her, rivaling that of real thunder. "I DON'T KNOW ANYONE ANYMORE!"
Clementine cried out as Hazen pinned both of their body weights against the railing of the outside balcony. Upon impact, Clem saw Lucas's hatchet fall out of her waistband and fall down into the darkness below. Both of them were being drenched by the rain, and the wind was howling around them. Clem squealed in pain as Hazen slipped his knife past her side and cut her by her left hip. "AHH!"
"Shh!" He whispered in her ear as he grabbed her free arm and kept his body up against hers. "Just a taste..."
And then Clementine felt his thick wet tongue lick her across and into her ear as he traveled from there to her cheek and ended on her nose. Clementine gagged and urged herself to cry out for help, but she was powerless in this position. "Ahh ha ha! Hahaha!"
Hazen was maniacal, probably didn't even know where he was, or who he was really assaulting right now! "Please stop!" Clementine begged with tears in her eyes. "Someone help!"
*BANG!*
Hazen cried out in pain, and Clementine glanced down to see the back of his left leg was bleeding. She then looked passed him to see Michael still impaled, gun in hand, staring at them both. "Get away... From her..." He ordered, his voice strained.
"Argh! Should've known you wouldn't die quietly!" Hazen grunted, his grip on Clementine loosening.
Michael moved his arm and then aimed at Hazen's head. "Go to..." He voice wavered. His eyelids closed for a brief moment and his grip on the gun began to slip. He opened his eyelids only slightly. "Go to hell..." He whispered.
He didn't get the chance to finish him off, since he passed out before he could pull the trigger a second time. The gun slipped through his fingers and clattered once it hit the ground.
"Michael!" Clementine called to him.
The teenager's pale form didn't answer.
Hazen seethed from the pain in his leg and turned back towards Clementine and gave her a menacing smile. "Go join Brooke!" He snarled. And in one swift motion he flipped Clementine up, over, and tossed her over the balcony.
(o) Grab railing.
But at the last second, Clem managed to grab hold of the bottom railings before she could fall to her death. The storm raged on around her while her feet dangled over the deadly drop, the wind and rain battered her as she summed up all the effort she could muster and she just barely pulled herself back onto the balcony. She lay there for a moment, her chest heaving, trying desperately to catch her breath after that near death experience.
She gradually got to her feet and staggered back towards the lantern room. Hazen was standing beside Michael, jabbing at his already torn open stomach with his knife. "That's what you get for playing the stupid hero! You hear me?!" He exasperated gruffly.
Michael let out a pained groan, blood that he had probably choked up dribbling from the corner of his mouth. He was still clinging on to life... But Clementine knew that he would eventually slip away in a matter of seconds. She just hoped that it was painless.
Clementine glanced around for any kind of weapon that she could use, before her eyes fell upon Michael's knife that had fell out of his hand some time earlier. Since Hazen was busy torturing Michael and unbeknownst to Clem's presence now, she took advantage, picking the familiar knife up.
(o) Stab Hazen.
Once she had it, she wasted no time charging towards Hazen. The older teen was taken by surprise as she drove the Michael's knife into his side. "GAHH!" He reacted by pushing Clementine back, causing the blade to be left in his flesh. "You're going to regret that!" He roared, picking Clementine up by her collar and throwing her against the lantern.
Clementine bashed her head on the light, stunning her for a brief moment. As her vision became hazy, she looked up to see Hazen limply advancing on her "You see? Y-you see...? O-only m-monsters can live in a world of monsters..."
Clem panicked, there were no weapons in reach, but then her head bumped into a steel lever, and that's when she had a real light bulb moment.
(o) Turn on lantern.
She glanced at the light before quickly pulling the lever down which turned on the lighthouse beacon. Hazen cried out in surprise as the bright light blinded him, causing him to stagger back and cover his eyes with his arm.
(o) Attack him.
Clementine took her chance, she had no time to lose as she got up and reached for the knife in Hazen. "RYA!" With a grunt, Clem pulled out the blade and dove the dagger into his stomach. Hazen cried and tried to get his bearings as Clementine ripped, twisted, and tore around in his stomach with the knife still in him, he loudly shouted out in pain once again.
When the beacon began its rotation and continue to revolve, Hazen tripped over his own shot leg and had to step back from the little girl so he wouldn't fall, causing the knife to slip out of his bleeding stomach.
But finally the trauma caught up to him, Hazen coughed up a full mouthful of blood, and he dropped his own knife as it clanged onto the floor... He covered his bleeding stomach with both hands, and he swayed for a brief moment before collapsing onto the floor on his back.
Clementine went over and quickly picked up Michael's gun. She shakily checked the clip and discovered it only had one bullet left in it. Clem gripped the gun in her hand as she approached Hazen, with Michael's knife in her other hand. She stared down at him with a look of rage.
"Clem..." Hazen wheezed, his expression had soften. He looked helpless... Afraid... But Clementine didn't feel much sympathy for him anymore. "Please..." He whispered. "Th-that... please... pl-ease kill me..." He coughed up some blood as he looked up at her. "I don't care... Please... please kill me..."
She looked at her gun, then at her knife.
[Shoot Hazen]
[Punish Hazen]
Clementine dropped the gun and gripped the handle of the knife with both hands. She lifted it above her head and drove it into Hazen's chest. He let out one final gasp for air before his life was extinguished like a burnt out flame.
The twelve year old twisted the knife and ripped it out of Hazen's chest and began to slash and stab his face over and over again. His blood caked her hands and sleeves, while some of it splattered onto her face and jacket.
All she could see was red. She probably would have carried on if she hadn't come to her senses. Once Clementine realized what she was doing, she almost vomited, barely keeping it down.
Clementine dropped Michael's bloodied knife, Hazen's face now completely unrecognizable after being slashed multiple times. She fell back and leaned against the beacon light, tears flowing down her cheeks.
She was now truly alone, it was real quiet now. Brooke... Hazen... Michael... They were all dead... AJ was missing... So were Dusty, Lucas, and Lilly...
Were they dead too?
Another flash of lightning and a roll of thunder echoed as she picked up Michael's gun off the floor, her sobs continuing as she thought of Lee and Kenny. "You promised that you'd always be there for me." She whimpered softly. "But you're not."
She had tortured Hazen. She looked at herself, she was no better than Carver or Katherine or... arguably Hazen himself. This was only the beginning, could only people who become monsters live in the world of walkers, is that what it's reduced to? The eventual fate of everyone to lose their former self, only in a matter of time. Clementine didn't feel that too far off now that she was going to lose her mind and hurt people she cared about too. She couldn't let herself end up like them. ...She wouldn't.
She tentatively pressed the barrel into her chin, her hands shaking violently. "I can't do it anymore, Lee." She whispered softly full of sobs. "I'm so tired...*hic* *sob* *hic* " She bawled, managing to steady her hand and grip the trigger.
It could all be over now.
All she had to do was squeeze the trigger... And then she'd get to see them again. She imagined it to be so warm and welcoming, the most unimaginable burdens of life being lifted off of her shoulders. It sounded so nice, seeing Lee... Kenny... her parents... everyone.
It would be so nice, so easy to give up now... all she had to do was pull the trigger and she'd could be genuinely happy.
[End It All]
[Continue to Survive]
Clementine was about to end it... All the suffering... All the loss... She kept her eyes closed until she heard a loud bang on the door, then a louder one, until she was interrupted by a voice when the locked exit was kicked open. "Clementine stop!"
It was... Dusty.
And she heard the cries of a live infant, not a dead one, in his arms. ...AJ was with him.
"Oh my god..." He took in the bloody scene before him. Michael skewered and bled out on the broken railing. Hazen soaked in his own blood on the floor with his face lacerated to hell. The burnt man quickly ran to her and knelt down beside her. "Clem, don't!" He snatched the gun out of her hands. "What are you doing?" He asked worriedly.
"I just want to make it stop, Dusty... I just want it all to stop." She cried and broke down in front of them.
Dusty looked back at the gruesome scene behind him, and placed Alvie into the little girl's arms. "That's never an option, Clem! Not when we have this little guy to protect." He replied firmly as Clementine stared down at infant.
Of course he calmed right down for her. "Alvie... I'm so sorry, I won't leave you, I promise." She whispered softly, planting a kiss on his forehead. He was okay, seeing him made her feel okay too.
Dusty went into a sitting position to comfort her. "Clem... Are you okay, are you hurt?" He questioned her, assuming that Hazen and Michael killed each other. But then he took into account that Clementine was covered in some blood as well.
"I... I don't know." She murmured, holding AJ close, she remembered the cut on her hip, but it wasn't bleeding that much.
"Clem, tell me what happen-!" Dusty began only to be cut off as Lucas came running into the lantern room.
He glanced around frantically before his eyes finally fell upon Michael's limp body. "No!" He exclaimed, running towards Michael. "Michael, Michael can you hear me?" He whispered. He paused, waiting for an answer he never received. "I'm gonna get you off, okay? You're gonna be okay."
"Lucas..." Clementine addressed over to him.
Lucas didn't listen, instead he pulled Michael off the railing and then laid him on the ground. He placed his hand on Michael's wound, trying his best to stop the bleeding.
"He's gone man!" Dusty declared, still trying assess the casualties here. "I'm sorry."
"No!" Lucas retorted, clearly in distress. "I can fix him! He'll be fine!" Lucas glanced down at his son and let out a whimper. "You're gonna be fine... you're going to be fine, son." He whispered.
"Lucas... It's over." Clem attempted to get through to him. "You have to let him go."
(?) Lucas will remember that.
"Stop! He's my boy, goddammit!" Lucas yelled at the both of them. "Just stop!"
Clementine turned her attention to Michael to see that his complexion was going from pale to grey. He was going to turn, she couldn't allow that to happen.
So, when she and Dusty stood up, she lifted her arm and aimed Michael's own gun at his head. Lucas was too busy reassuring an already dead Michael and himself to notice what was happening. Dusty simply glanced at Clem, bit down on his lip, and nodded.
She had a clear shot...
She had to take it.
(o) Shoot Michael.
She squeezed the trigger, and the back of Michael's head erupted shortly after, while some of his blood splattered on Lucas' face.
"NO!"
Outside... the storm had finally died down.
A/N- The human mind is an enigma, unique in its own self between every person.
Would you kill someone if you were forced at gunpoint? Should you still be punished for doing so even if the alternative was death?
In any case, Hazen was still traumatized, and he let his own guilt and repression disbar him from sanity. He was his own tragedy, and a violent one at that. 'Just a real bomb waiting to go off'.
What is remained left in this group now? What should they do next? Find out its conclusion next time on the last chapter of the story. There will also be a credits/comments chapter after that. Stay tuned.