Disclaimer: The Hunger Games is awesome, and so is Pokemon, and I had this idea while I lolled around on my bed like an angst-ridden teenager, so it's safe to say that none of this is mine. But damn, I find this sad. (listen with sad music to complete the mood, is my recommendation)
Characters: Amber from the first pokemon movie, along with… well, you'll figure it out. (And ignore the timeline flaws, okay?)
Summary: The build-up to Amber's death.
The Beginning Is the End of the Beginning
~Deep in the meadow, hidden far away
A cloak of leaves, a moonbeam ray
Forget your woes and let your troubles lay,
And when again it's morning, they'll wash away~
Once upon a beginning, a little girl was wheeled into the hospital. Teal-coloured hair was fanned out across the pillow, matching eyes shut in exhaustion and pain; red spots could be seen under her flesh, the porcelain skin stretched tightly over her bones. Her mother was crying, holding one hand; her father was too still, clutching the other. We just thought she had the flu, her mother would say again and again. She'd sweat, hardly eat anything- but then she started to bleed, and- and-
And then the little girl opened her eyes, and gave a smile that wasn't forced. "Don't cry, please," she said, patting the arthritic hand that was laid upon hers. "It'll be alright."
Tears of adults spilled when the doctors explained that it wouldn't.
0000
~Deep in the meadow, under the willow
A bed of grass, a soft green pillow
Lay down your head, and close your eyes
And when they open, the sun will rise~
Once upon a hospital room, a little girl met an older one. The older one was in a wheelchair, her legs and protruding stomach covered by a faded old quilt. Her hair was a waterfall of green, and it framed a mother's face.
"I'm Amber," the little girl said the day she moved in, offering a cheerful hand. The older one smiled, taking it reverently in both of hers. "What's your name?"
"Hello, Amber. I'm Adonia." Her smile was warm, and Amber hugged her, glad that she wouldn't be alone in her new home. "It's so nice to meet you."
"It's so nice to meet you, too, Adonia." Amber pulled back, beaming. "Are you going to have a baby, Adonia? Is that why you're here?"
"Yes, honey, I am." Adonia's whole face softened, her mouth going plush with adoration as she gazed down at the little girl. "But I'm a little sick, too, so that's why I'm going to stay here until the baby comes."
Amber laid a gentle hand upon Adonia's stomach. "Is your baby going to be a boy or a girl?"
"A boy." Her whole face shone with pride.
"What are you going to name him?"
"I don't know." Adonia pulled Amber onto her lap, playing with her hair. "Want to help me find a name?"
Amber closed her eyes, laying a contemplative finger on her lips as she thought. "How about N?" she said finally, opening her eyes.
"N?" Her companion gave a chuckle. "Why N, honey?"
"N's my favourite letter. It stands for lots of things," said Amber reasonably. "N stands for 'nice', 'naïve', 'nap', 'night', 'name', 'natural'…"
Adonia wore a bemused expression. "That's a lovely idea, Amber. Thank you." Then she hesitated, her face falling the tiniest bit. "Why are you here, Amber?"
"I'm a little bit sick, too, but don't worry." Amber half-turned to rest a hand on the side of Adonia's face, her smile as warm as the summer sun. "Something called 'leukemia'. It's just a bug, I'll get over it- I always do!" She laughed, laughed innocently, and when she did so Adonia noticed the lumps on her neck and her bleeding gums.
"Oh, Amber," Adonia whispered, her eyes filling.
"Don't cry, please," Amber chimed, her hand warm and slick against Adonia's skin. "It'll be alright."
Nevertheless, Adonia couldn't help but hold her close.
0000
~Here your dreams are sweet, and tommorrow brings them true
Here is the place where I love you~
Once upon a delivery, a little girl lost one of her closet friends.
The screaming was terrible, and Amber sat through it all, hanging onto Adonia's hand and telling her that everything was going to be alright. Adonia's face was as white as the sheets that covered her, but it lit up when the squalling red baby was passed to her.
"I'm naming him N for you, Amber," the older woman said in the barest of whispers, tears trembling on the tips of her viridian lashes. "Say hello to Amber, N. Say hello." Amber giggled, reaching out tentatively to touch the wrinkled skin.
"Hello, N," Amber murmured. "Hello, little baby N. Welcome to the world." She was smiling as much as Adonia was, and as the two watched N hiccupped, paused and began to smile. His dark blue eyes creased, and Adonia stifled a sob of joy, cradling him to her heart. "You have the best mom in the world," Amber continued, a little choked up herself. "She's so nice. She's made all of this not scary for me, and she's going to do the same for you."
The doctors took N from them then, and had a whispered conversation with Adonia. Amber couldn't hear any of it, but she watched as the light in Adonia's eyes dulled, and her whole face creased in grief and understanding. She gave a shaky nod of her head, and sank back onto the pillows.
"What's wrong?" Amber asked when the doctors left. "Why do you look so sad?"
"I'm just a little tired, honey," sighed Adonia after a moment. "Come sit by me awhile, would you?"
Amber did so, laying down on the bedside beside her friend and holding her hand. Adonia circled the little girl's knuckles with her thumb, her breaths breaking and hitching in strange places.
"Can I tell you a story, Amber?" Adonia asked after a while.
"Of course," answered Amber, cuddling into the new mother's side.
"Once upon a time, there was a girl that met a boy. The boy had many dreams, you see, and the girl believed in all of them: they gathered many supporters in their travels, and they strived to make the world an even better place, filled with peace and love and everything good.
"But then the boy began to ask for too much, and the girl started to worry for him. He was… changing. He was changing into something that scared her. It was the greed that was changing him, she decided: the greed for more, always more, and losing sight of what he had sought out to begin with.
"So one night, she confronted him. She told him of the things she saw in him, and told him that she had decided to leave. She still loved him, she said- but the real him, not the person he had changed into.
"He got angry. Angrier than she had ever seen him. He got too angry, and pushed her away from him in a fit of anger- and she took a tumble down the stairs, crushing her legs."
Adonia's voice was growing unsteady, and Amber was filled with sorrow, not liking this story at all.
"It was when she was in the hospital that she found out she was pregnant. Even though it was the boy's child, she had never been happier; even when the doctors told her that she was too weak to have the baby, she still rejoiced. So she decided she wanted the baby, and stayed in the hospital for a month. It was a long month filled with loneliness, and she thought that she'd never get through it.
"It was then that God sent her an angel."
Amber's lip was trembling in empathy, but she felt an arm go around her shoulders, lightly squeezing. "You are that angel, Amber," Adonia said. "You have been so kind to me all these months, and I thank you for that. You- and N- were what kept me going. And this is why I'm sorry that I have to say goodbye."
"Goodbye?" Amber echoed, sitting up. "What are you talking about, Adonia? Are you leaving the hospital now that N's here?"
Tears were rolling down Adonia's cheeks and into her mouth. "Yes, honey, I am."
"But you'll come back, right?" Amber pleaded, taking hold of both Adonia's hands. "You're my friend. Won't you visit?"
"I don't think I can, Amber honey." She pulled one hand free to cover her mouth, trying to hold back the sobs. "But I'll always be with you, okay? Whenever you feel scared, whenever you feel lonely, know that I'm right there beside you, even if you can't see me."
"Where are you going?" Amber asked, beginning to sniffle.
"A nice place," she whispered. "A meadow."
"I like meadows," Amber said. "Can I come with you?"
Adonia was shaking with the intensity of her sorrow. "Yes," she said thickly. "But not right now. I'll meet you there, though, I promise."
"Okay," Amber replied, pacified. She laid her head down on Adonia's chest, listening to her heartbeat. "Can you tell me about the meadow, Adonia?"
"Yes." She swallowed hard. "The sun and moon are most beautiful there, sifting through the arms of the willow tree. A sea of daisies stretches all the way to the horizon. There is nothing bad there, nothing bad at all; it's nothing but light, light filled with everything good in life. Life is wonderful, Amber, please remember that."
"I will. I promise."
"Can you tell me something now, Amber, before I go away?" she choked out between her tears, and Amber listened as Adonia's heartbeat dwindled.
"Of course, Adonia."
"Tell me not to cry, please." Her voice cracked. "Tell me it'll be alright."
"Don't cry, please," Amber recited, crying a little herself. "It'll be alright."
She repeated it until the doctors came to take her away from the cold, dead body.
0000
~Here it's safe, and here it's warm
Here the daisies guard you from every harm~
Once upon an ending, a little girl died.
The numbers of tubes had increased every day, snaking out from her limbs like dozens of sterile white arms. It was hard for her to breathe. But still the younger children would flock to her, sitting around her bedside and listening to the stories she would tell of the healing tears of pokemon and the good they did. She'd sit up in bed, talking around her oxygen mask and making them laugh when all they wanted to do was cry.
"Don't cry, please," she'd always say. "It'll be alright."
They believed her.
Soon she couldn't move at all, and although her half-shut eyes were fixed on the ceiling all she envisioned was the meadow. Her mother and father would come to her crying, stroking her hair back from her face and telling Amber that they loved her. But Amber would just shake her head, smile and say those five little words, and then her attention would fade and she'd drift off to sleep.
Life is wonderful, she'd hear Adonia tell her every night. Please remember that.
I will. I promise.
Then she would wake from sleep crying.
On her birthday her father brought her three pokemon- a bulbasaur, a charmander and a squirtle- and she cuddled them, tears of joy running down her cheeks.
"When I get better, we'll all be great friends!" she cheered. "I'll be the best trainer ever, I promise! We'll go visit baby N, and play, and meet new people, and it'll be wonderful! Life will be wonderful!"
But eventually her father stopped bringing them to play, saying that they were tiring her out, and Amber was left only with dreams of Adonia's meadow to keep her company.
Thanksgiving passed by in a flash. Instead of turkey she got a procedure.
Halloween saddened her greatly. She had wanted to go as an angel, for Adonia, and take baby N trick-or-treating, but the nurses wouldn't let her.
Christmas came and went. Her father came to tell her that he had given her pokemon away. Amber cried herself to sleep that night.
New Year's arrived next. The only fireworks she saw were in the drawings of them she drew for herself.
Easter came, but she couldn't paint herself an egg. Her eyesight was completely gone.
Seasons filtered by too slowly. The kids that had come to listen to her either died or got better. So instead, she told stories to herself. Stories of meadows and babies and miracles and what she would do when she got better.
Soon enough, her father stopped coming. Her mother told her it was because he was too sad.
September. October. November. December.
Where are you going?
January. February. March. April. May.
A nice place. A meadow.
June. July.
I'll meet you there, though. I promise.
August.
I promise.
The day she died was her favourite kind of day, even if she couldn't see it. Her mother was sitting by her side, her head bowed; her father was nowhere to be seen. Sunlight sifted through the willow tree outside her window, glinting off her sparse and patchy hair and causing it to glow as if it were a halo.
Amber's head rolled to the side, facing her mother. "It hurts."
"I know, baby." She smoothed the brittle hair back from her daughter's forehead.
"I heard the doctors say that I might die today." There was a startled intake of breath, and silence fell, heavy as an axe. "It's true, isn't it?"
Her mother pressed a fist to her mouth to keep from bawling, but a few strangled sounds managed to leak through.
"Don't cry, please. It'll be alright." She gave a tiny sigh, closing her sightless eyes. "What is 'dying', mommy? Why is it sad?"
"It's…Well, sometimes, when a person is very old or very sick, they die. They go to sleep and don't wake up."
"If I go to sleep, will I die?"
"…"
"Will I?"
"…No, baby."
"Why don't they wake up?"
"They can't, baby. They go someplace else- a nice place called heaven."
Amber's face glowed. "Adonia told me about the nice place. She says it's a meadow."
Her mother hesitated before answering. "Yes. That's what heaven is."
"And why is it sad? If we get to go to heaven, then why is dying sad?"
"Because…because you have to say goodbye to the living, baby."
"…So you're in the meadow alone?"
"No. You get to see all the people you love that have died. Like Grandma and Grandpa and Mrs. Lovett and everyone."
"Oh." Amber's pallid face had never been more radiant, tears dribbling down her cheeks. "I get to see Adonia, mommy! She promised she'd meet me there! Oh, mommy, I've missed her!"
Her mother had to bury her face in the pillow to stop herself from sobbing.
"But." Her joy died down a little. "I have to say goodbye to you, too, mommy. You and Daddy and little baby N." She reached over to hug her mother, her arms heavy and uncoordinated. "I love you, mommy. I'll see in the meadow, someday, though. Won't I?"
"Yes, baby." Her mother clung back desperately. "Yes, baby, you will. And I'll miss you every single day until I see you there. I love you, Amber." Her voice lowered and broke into a million pieces. "I don't know how I'll be able to live without you."
"Just remember that life is wonderful," Amber told her. "And you will."
The little girl lowered herself back down, and folded her hands across her heart. Her smile was still in place, her wet eyes shut tight. "I'm so tired, mommy," she murmured.
"You can go to sleep," her mother answered through her tears.
"You'll stay with me?"
"Yes. Always."
"…Okay, then." Amber yawned, and snuggled into her mother's arms. "…Mommy?"
"Yes?"
"Can you do something for me?"
"Anything."
"Can you give this letter to N?" She pulled a tiny slip of paper out from underneath her pillow, and handed it to her mother. "The nurses will keep it with him, I'm sure. I wrote it for him back when I could see and my hands didn't hurt so much. It's telling him about his mother, and how she loves him, and what a wonderful person she is. I feel sad that he won't get to grow up with her, but I want him to know that she'll always be there for him. So can you do that for me? Please?"
"Of course, Amber."
"Then I'm going to go to sleep now."
"Alright, baby."
"Goodnight," Amber whispered.
"Goodbye," her mother whispered back.
Amber's fingers twitched over her heart, as if holding something precious there, and she smiled at something no one else could see. Neither her nor her mother noticed Amber's father standing in the doorway, his hand moving to his heart as if it was dying in tandem with his daughter's.
"Don't cry, please, " Amber told herself one last time, despite the tears that were streaming down her cheeks. "It'll be alright."
Then, with a daisy-filled wind that swept in through the window, Amber's smile widened, and the heart monitor flatlined.
~Here is the place where I love you~