12 - Memories
I was back to normal by the time Phil drove me home, the nausea was completely gone and all that was left of the headache was a little twinge at the back of my head. After waking up this morning, well closer to this afternoon, it was starting to be a mystery to that alcoholism was a problem in the world. No matter how good drinking made you feel, it was not worth the price the next morning.
It might have helped for you to start a little slower the first time. Drinking shots of tequila might not be the best way to begin.
My physical discomforts alleviated I was able to concentrate on all the complications that I had been avoiding - the other thing about drinking, when you sober up all your problems are still there. I sat in the truck next to a silent Phil, staring out at the passing trees but not really focusing on anything. I would almost have taken the headache over trying to sort out my thoughts.
As much as I would like to, there was no way I could ignore Phil's question. He was an intelligent man, obviously since he was a freaking doctor, but beyond that he was amazingly observant - to the point that I would have sworn he knew about me being a wolf. But he has not run for the hills, so that means he has not figure it all out, yet. All that was beside the point, Phil wanted to know why I loved Sam.
Some might wonder why I would bother, why go through the torture but then they did not know Phil. I had spent nearly two months with Phil, and this was the first time he had asked a direct question regarding my turbulent relationship with Sam. If Phil thought it was important enough to ask it might behove me to try to find out the answer.
For most people remembering their first love should bring back a sense of nostalgia and innocence, but for me those memories would be forever tainted by the way it all ended. It was a painful process thinking back to my time with Sam, but as much as it it hurt I needed to find the answer to Phil's question - if only for myself.
There were several reasons for me to search for an answer: the most superficial was that I needed proof of my love, something that I could rub into Phil's face to show my true devotion to Sam. How do you separate out the emotions? All my memories of Sam were clouded by a haze of feelings that ran the gauntlet from love to hate, at times a mixture of both. But I needed to force myself to do this, there was no other way I could sort through the tangled mess around my heart and soul. This was another reason to figure it all out, in order to truly be able to leave the reservation I had to find a way to come to terms with my past - otherwise I would have to spend the rest of my life carrying the baggage of Sam's betrayal.
Even though we had both grown up on the reservation Sam and I did not really hang out, our parents associated with different people and we did not have any friends in common. It was not until I was a Freshman in high school that he actually talked to me, it had been a major ego boost having a Junior notice me. At the time I was somewhat shy, the attention of an "older" more mature man had been flattering. It was not until later that I had come to realize that Sam was actually a very nice guy. I could only use the fact that I was fifteen as an excuse, the typical self absorbed teenager.
Our relationship had grown from it being cool to hang out with a Junior to something more serious. I remember my mother telling me to take things slowly, I was too young. But I had been determined to grow up, I was an adult I would have adult relationships. My mother could not tell me who to love or how much to love them.
I laughed a little at myself now, it was not a happy sound. As stupid as this sounded, I should have listened to my mother. For a moment I wondered how many times someone had thought that exact same thing throughout history. Probably a lot.
At the time it was easy to look down on my friends and their constant switching of boyfriends, they had nothing that could even come close to my relationship with Sam. I was the one they came to for advice, and I was not shy about giving out my sage opinions. In retrospect I hoped the damage done by my words was minimal, I knew nothing about breakups or heartache, hell at this point I was starting to admit to myself that I knew nothing about relationships.
I had not felt superior when Sam had left me, my friends had not tried to give me the same crap advice I had given them. I guess they had learned how worthless my words actually were. I quickly bypasses the memory of what I had done when Sam had first left me, I did not want to think about that. I moved back in time instead, to when everything in my world was perfect.
I can't exactly remember when Sam and I started thinking of our future together, we just sort of started talking about it.
"Where do you want to live when we grow up?" I asked him one day. He was getting ready to graduate high school, I wanted to know his plans, so that I could make my own.
I was getting frustrated with him for not thinking of the future, he seemed happy with just letting things go on as they had been. He had been helping one of the shops on the Rez, being a trail guide. Sam had always enjoyed being outdoors, that was where he had been the happiest. I eventually pinned him down and made him formulate a plan. It had been a simple one, go to college to get a degree in forestry or something along those lines then he would come back here to the tribe. I could see him as a forest ranger, and there were enough national forests in the region for him to have a great deal of job security. I had been very pleased with him for coming up with such a brilliant plan. He had even had a scholarship which he was forced to turn down when he changed into a werewolf.
In retrospect it seemed I should have given a little more thought as to why it had taken him so long to decide on a career path. I should have examined how he was reacting to the pressure I had placed on him to decide. In my defense, I was barely seventeen at the time.
I noticed that we were getting close to the house. It had been a little longer ride than usual, Phil seemed to be taking his time for once. I don't know why he decided today was the day he was going to obey the speed limit but I was grateful for the quiet time. I also appreciate him not trying to force a conversation.
We were just pulling up the driveway when I remembered something crucial - my mother. I would have to explain to her where I was for the past twenty four hours. I saw the curtains flick on the living room window, my mother was waiting for me. I did not like the deep frown on my mother's face. Maybe I should have spent some time of the ride thinking of a good excuse, there was no way I could ever admit the truth to her. Not if I valued my or Phil's life.
My mother came to stand on the front porch before Phil had even shut down the engine on the truck. Her arms were crossed across her chest, her glower seemed to be increasing in intensity. Oh crap, did she somehow use her mother powers and figure out what I had been doing last night? Had Phil betrayed me? He had been angry with me last night, but I doubt he had been upset enough for him to tattle to my mother.
I spent a few moments being a coward, and trying to think of an excuse as to why I was coming home in the middle of the afternoon. I was not even wearing my own clothes, this really did not look good. I had not considered having to deal with my mother and I floundered around for an explanation. One that did not involve telling my mother I got drunk as a skunk last night, and woke up with the worst of all hangovers sometime in the middle of the afternoon.
Phil got out before me, I watched my mother's gaze go from mine to his. As much as I enjoyed having my mother's attention being drawn away from me it was unfair to Phil. I was not the nicest of people but I would deal with the consequences of my own actions - plus I happened to like Phil, and I would not want to sic my mom on my worst enemy, she could be really scary.
I sighed and reluctantly opened the door to the truck, "Hi mom." I tried to smile but I do not think I did a very good job of it.
"Leah," my mother may have just said my name out loud but I heard the rest of the message: you are in so much trouble young lady, now get into the house so that I can begin tearing you apart. I noticed she was still engaged in a staring contest with Phil.
I looked at Phil as I walked past him, no one I knew with the possible exception of the vampires could wipe their faces as clear of all things as well as Phil. Last night at the party I watched him as he interacted with members of my tribe, I got the impression that he did not actually feel the emotions his face was projecting - I had seen his real smile directed at me, and it was disconcerting to see him fake it for everyone else.
Facing my angry mother again I walked towards the house, in my peripheral vision it looked like Phil shook his head - one small movements indicating 'no' but when I looked over my shoulder he was as motionless as a vampire, still holding my mother's gaze. Did Phil have a death wish? Had he just tried to tell my mother what to do? It must have been a figment of my imagination.
I stopped next to my mother on the porch, my steps were slow and measured as my mind refused to work. I may have snuck out with Sam a time or two but I was never gone this long and back then the excuse was planned out before I came home. The worse part of it was that I knew I deserved it, I guess I would just have to listen to the lecture that was coming. Please, please let her not know about the fact that I was drunk last night.
"One second Leah," I heard Phil say, I watched as he moved towards the back of his truck. He reached in to get a box of some sort out of the bed of his truck. I had not seem him put that in there before we left.
"This is for you." He walked up and handed me the box. "Have a nice evening. Mrs Clearwater. Leah." There he went again, fake smile for my mother, real smile for me.
He got in the truck without saying another word, my mother and I watched silently as he drove away.
"What is in the box?" My mother asked suspiciously. I guess I had her full attention now. Oh goodie.
"Never mind," she said curtly, "get in the house Leah."
The speed with which I followed her in the house had nothing to do with how heavy the box was, it had everything to do with how reluctant I was to hear the lecture. I calculated my chances of survival if she figured out I had gotten drunk last night. I was wondering if it was too much to ask for another newborn army right now. Just a small one would be nice, I would prefer them to having to talk to my mother.
"Leah do you have any idea what you are telling some man when you spend the night at his house? Do you want to be seen as easy? What others will say?" She started off her lecture with no warning as soon as I stepped into the house.
I put the box down on the coffee table and looked at her confused. Of all the things my mother would have said I have to admit this was not one of them.I guess I had been too busy thinking she had found out about my drinking to remember that I had spent the night with Phil, this time I did not have the excuse that he was sick. After a moment I realized this was a good thing, I could defend myself against this accusation.
"Look mom, I have no idea why everyone seems to think Phil is my boyfriend. You, Jake, and even Sam keep harping on and on about the subject. We are just not like that, Phil is not my boyfriend. He is a friend, that is all. There should be no worries about that part, he has never once treated me like a potential girlfriend. He does not strike me as a shy type of man, so it is not that he is reluctant to ask me out." I took a deep breath before I continued my tirade, "I am not ready to date some guy, I need to figure out what I am going to do with myself before I throw a man into the chaos that is my life."
My speech seemed to take some of the steam out of my mother's prepared lecture. "So what is it that you do at his house all day long?"
"I don't know, stuff. He is trying to teach me to cook, that is not going well. We go hiking around the woods together, though we had kind of stopped doing that recently. He might just be getting cold, since he is totally obsessed with keeping me warm. I have a table set up to work on my beads in his study. While I work on that he reads stuff on his computer and mutters to himself." I realized I was rambling but the word vomit just kept on coming. I needed to reassure my mother that I was not having sex with Phil. Though if he offered I don't know if I would say no. All right it was not the time to be thinking like that.
I could not tell my mother I was still a virgin, that would have been a lie. So I stuck to the truth instead, leaving out a few details she did not need to know about. "We do not cuddle on the couch watching TV together, I don't think either one of us could stop fidgeting long enough to actually enjoy it. We don't go on dates, no movies or dinners at a fancy restaurant or even dancing. We just hang out, mostly discussing weird things like Thomas Hardy and why his books make you want to commit suicide. Our relationship is completely platonic, the only time he has ever touched me was when I cried all over his shirt." Oh crap, my mother did not need to know about that part.
"I see," my mother interrupted my rant, but it sounded more like a question than a statement. My mother looked taken aback by my long speech, she searched the room and her eyes found the box Phil had handed to me. "What is that then?" She asked, repeating her earlier question.
"Well I think it is a little bit too big to be a ring," I told mother with a straight face. Based on her expression she did not find my joke amusing. "Honestly, I have no idea. It smells like paper. Not food."
"You sound like your brother. All you think about is your stomach." My mother laughed at me as she joined me in looking down at the box. It was not a moving cardboard box, it looked more like one of those boxes with a lid that people used to store their office supplies in.
"You try being a teenage werewolf and see where your priorities lie." I might have to thank Phil for providing the box as a distraction, it had partially helped avert a major lecture. Though the night was still young, my mother could go on about my sluttish ways as soon as we figured out what was in the box.
"Well open it." She commanded, I could tell she was wanting to it herself, but was holding back since he had handed it over to me.
Reaching for the lid I suddenly paused, was this something I could open in front of my mother? I hope Phil had not given me something naughty, I could see him giving me a strange gift as a practical joke. He had handed it to me while my mother was watching, so it should be all right. I tried to reassure myself with the thought that spent far too much energy cultivating a relationship with mother to ruin it for a joke. Feeling a little better about it, I lifted the lid. Inside the box was a pile of labeled and stamped manila envelopes. To say I was confused was an understatement.
"Does he expect you to take his mail to the post office?" My mother sounded as baffled as I was.
I picked one of them up to examine it more closely. The return address was mine, I did not recognize the mailing address. It was not sealed so I opened it up to see what was inside. It took me a few seconds to read the printed words and recognize what I was holding in my hand.
"Oh it is a college application." My mother said as she read over my shoulder. I pulled out more and more envelopes. They all had college applications inside with the appropriately stamped and addressed envelopes. He had gone even so far as to clip a money order to the papers if an application fee was required.
"I guess someone has been a busy boy." I told my mother. I did not know what else to say.
I finally found a note:
I thought this would help you get started,
Best of luck P.
It was kind of hard to make out the writing, his penmanship was horrible, the jokes I had heard about doctors having illegible writing had some basis in truth. This might be the reason all the address labels were printed and not handwritten.
"Wow," my mother it seemed had been rendered speechless. I did not blame her, I too was a little blown away - I speculated how much time it took for him to get all these together. He could not have done this only in one morning. It was flattering that he would invest this much time in my future, especially since he liked to remind me of the fact that he would not be around for it.
"I guess he is determined for you to go to college," I could hear the awe in her voice. She too must be calculating how much this took.
"Being a doctor and all might make him be a big supporter of education," I said looking her in the eye.
My mother made a face, so she had known he was a doctor. I wonder why he had told her and not me. "Yes of course. I will go finish making dinner," she said backing away from me and the box.
I spent what was left of the afternoon filing out application after application while my mother puttered around in the kitchen. This is how my brother found me when he came home - envelopes scattered all around the living room.
"What the hell is this?" he asked without even saying hello.
"I heard that Seth, watch your mouth young man." My mother called from the kitchen.
"I swear, sometimes I suspect she has werewolf hearing," Seth muttered under his breath.
I tried not to laugh as I finished writing out my name and address yet again. I was starting to get a cramp in my hand. This was going to take longer than I had anticipated.
"Go wash your hands, dinner is almost ready," mother said peeking out of the kitchen.
Getting up I nearly toppled over with pain, "damn it." I had been sitting on one leg and it had managed to gall asleep, Seth watched laughing as I hopped around the living room on one foot while I worked out the pain. Finally able to use both feet I looked around the room to see what I had accomplished.
I had ink stains all over my fingers but I had tackled a large portion of the pile of envelopes. The hard part was not over yet, some of the more elaborate ones required essays. Something about life goals and crap like that. I did not think getting away from my ex boyfriend was a good theme for an essay, I would have to think of something cheesy enough to satisfy them.
"Thanks Seth," I told him as he walked around and helped me put the scattered envelopes back in the box. He really was the nicest person on the planet, he had inherited that trait from my father.
"Wow sis you want to go to Berkley?" He said looking at the envelope in his hand.
I has been too busy to read all the labels properly, after a while it had become a blur of filling out my name, address, and the same personal information.
"Give that to me." I grabbed the envelope he was looking at. Apparently Phil thought it might be a good plan for me to apply to Berkley. I thought of tossing this one into the trash, there was no way in the world I would ever get in. If I thought about it California might be nice, the sunny state. Too sunny for vampires, that was always a bonus point in my book. I carefully placed the Berkley application on top of the others in the box.
My mother did not say anything as we all ate our dinner together. She had made a baked fish, potatoes and a green salad. The fish was good, I was wondering if I should ask her about the recipe, I might have to try it one day. Or have Phil teach me how to bake it.
"Thanks mom for the food, I got some homework to finish," Seth said as he finished inhaling the meal. He took his plate to the sink rinsed it and disappeared into his room. I could hear music blaring from his small stereo.
"With all that has gone on for the past couple of months sometimes I forget about the mundane things, like reminding him to do his homework." Mother's gaze swung from the door to Seth's bedroom back to me. "Speaking of things I should remind you of. Leah, are you going to call Phil to thank him for what he did?"
"Yeah I guess I should call," I admitted reluctantly. I was not ready to talk to Phil quite yet, I did not know the answer to the question he had asked.
"You have no idea how lucky you are that he is such a nice man," Mother commented mostly to herself, "I wonder why he is doing it?"
"Why did he tell you he was doing it?" I asked her, he must have told her something to convince her not get all freaked out about her daughter spending that much time with a stranger.
She made another face, seeming reluctant to reveal his reasons but after a moment of thought she spoke quietly. "He told me that at one point in his life he was in a worse spot than you are, and he had someone that was there to give him a little boost. He could not repay the person but he could do for someone else what was done for him."
"So I am a charity case? Great." I was getting annoyed, I did not want to be pitied.
"Does he treat you like that? Like a charity case?" She asked all of a sudden a sudden spark in her eyes.
"No, he might harass me about things but when it comes down to it Phil treats me with respect." I was trying to appease my mother with something because I could not yet define what we were. On one hand I counted him among my friends, actually at this point he was my only friend - as far as the non-supernatural world was concerned I knew Phil had my back. He would support me not matter what I wanted to do. Phil was determined to teach me how to survive on my own, I was surprised he had not made me prove I could change a flat tire. When I wanted to try something truly stupid he did not try to stop me but instead let me learn from my mistakes, sort of like this morning with my hangover.
I could understand my mother's fears, he was a healthy man and I was a younger girl who had been recently totally fucked over in the relationship department. However Phil had never made any sexual overtures towards me, while he was affectionate it was more of a friendly tone rather than that of a lover - there might have been moments in time when I wanted to jump his bones, I would like you to find me a girl who would not consider it. Phil was smart, funny, and considerate; on top of all that there was his amazing ass and those killer dimples. So yeah I might have had a tiny crush on Phil, but that did not mean I was going to act on it, especially since he had never given me any encouragement.
"Leah what is that?" my mom interrupted my thoughts.
I looked down to see that while I had been daydreaming about Phil my fingers had on their own started to play with the bracelet he had given me. "Oh this? Phil gave it to me." I answered her, my mind still on trying to figure out where to put Phil.
"Why is he giving you jewelry?" her voice was filled with suspicion.
"Oh, no reason. I think when he left town he promised me a surprise when he came back." I lifted my wrist to show my mother, "it is really not a big deal, he says he picked out the flowers. Honestly I don't think they really go together."
"No they don't, you would think the sales girl would have said something to him," my mother agreed with a giggle.
"Yeah, but you know what mom? The customer is always right." I repeated her old mantra back at her.
I tried calling Phil after helping my mother wash the dinner dishes. He did not pick up his house phone or the cell phone number. I was somewhat relieved not having to talk to him.
For about an hour after heading to bed I wasted my time tossing and turning while sleep eluded me. The insomnia might have been the fact that I had slept past noon, but it was mainly the plethora of things floating around in my head.
Last night had been horrible, and I had fallen down into that darkness again but it was much easier to get out of it a second time. Today might have started with paying homage to the porcelain gods but it ended with a great feeling of accomplishment. One promise to myself had been fulfilled, I had started to look for a college. The path that would lead me away from this bitter woman I had become in the past few months was visible and I had taken the several steps in the right direction.
Thinking back this journey started when I had hopped on the back of the bike with Phil; he gave me the first opportunity to decide for myself, the first step towards the journey away from here. I could not stay angry with Phil, even if he was doing this for charity he was still a good friend. He could have forcibly pushed me down this path towards the light. Instead, he pointed me in the right direction and let me take my stumbling route towards it.
If it was not for his heartbeat I would have almost made thought he was a psychic like Alice, alway anticipating my needs. He could have just told me to get over myself from the beginning and went on his merry way. I got the impression that Phil normally was a pushy man, it was a great compliment that he had taken his time to allow me to walk down the path with only a little bit of nudging. I was by no means at the light at the end of the tunnel, but I could see a hint of it somewhere on the horizon. I hoped it would live up to the promise of the light.
A huge block in my road was the situation with Sam. There was one question I had considered a thousand times. What would have happened had the vampires not come back to Forks? Every time in the past I had always assumed that Sam would still be with me, we would be in college together by now. Maybe there might be some wedding plans, but nothing concrete as of yet.
Today my answer was less certain, why had I been in love with Sam? Was it because he was an older boy paying attention to me? Did I really know anything about him or had I pushed my own expectations onto him. It was hard to assimilate the possibility that Sam was not the person I thought he was; I tried to see him as a person and not the teenage fantasy I had created. You should judge a person by their deeds - or so the saying went. So to see Sam's character it would be best to see how he had behaved.
One situation stood out glaringly in my memory. When Jake went to check on Bella after she came back from the honeymoon the pack was waiting for him to see what had happened. I could clearly remember everyone's reaction when Jake had come back to tell us the story of Bella being pregnant with a leech's kid. Sam was determined to destroy the unknown child and did not care if he had to take Bella with it; he had immediately given the order to attack, without even considering any other option. The rest of the pack members had not put up any resistance to Sam's orders, they just went along with the plan. Some of them even had thought of it as a game, thinking of pitting their strength against that of the vampires.
Jake had resisted Sam's orders not because it was the right thing to do but because he was willing to protect Bella at any cost. Sam's reaction had not been pretty, he had tried to use more of his alpha power over Jake. What kind of a leader does that to his own people? Had Jake not been the true alpha Sam could have completely broken Jake's spirit, if not his mind. As soon as Jake had resisted and my brother left with him a plan began to formulate in my mind, I am ashamed to admit I thought of only myself. The need to get away from Sam was all that mattered.
When I looked back at that moment in time I saw that out of the entire pack Seth had been the only one who had acted with the modicum of though and consideration. He did the right thing for the right reasons; he left with Jake because he was going to protect a family. They might have been a vampire family, but that did not matter to Seth.
The new Sam I was seeing without the skewed view of my teenage dreams was somewhat scary, he was not the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. For the first time I was starting to think that there was a benefit to the vampires coming to Forks. How long would I have remained oblivious to his true character? If he was willing to do that to members of the pack, what would he have done to his wife if she went against him?
Fear was starting to creep into my lungs, making it harder to catch my breath. I was undressed and halfway out my window before my mind registered my actions. My room was getting too small for my thoughts, I needed to be under the sky, I could not stand being in this confined space any longer.
I was almost down to the tree line before I considered my mother. I was turning over a new leaf, I was going to start thinking before I acted. I ran back to the house and quickly jotted a note for my mother telling her I needed to go for a run. I promised to be back before we had to leave for work in the morning.
The smell of frost permeated the air as I headed south through the forest, I wondered who was on patrol tonight. I could not hear the other wolves, it would not matter, I was the fastest and could outrun any of them. I felt a smirk on my wolf face as I picked up speed, it really bothered them that I was the fastest among both packs. I found a small waterfall where a stream was cascading over some rocks and lapped up some of the water. I chuckled just thinking of Phil freaking out that I was drinking the water from a stream. Yeah Leah he would be freaking out over you drinking the water, not the fact that you are a six foot tall werewolf.
After I had satisfied my thirst I sat down on a large flat boulder, laying my head on my front paws. I continued my thoughts about Sam, I thought about him a great deal so this was not an unusual occurrence. The tone of my thoughts was what made this different.
Sam had not always had an easy life, he had never said anything outright but I had the impression his father was abusive. I was not sure if there had been any physical abuse involved but there had definitely been verbal abuse. It was one of those things that everyone suspected but no one did something about; people had been too afraid of his father. It had always amazed me how nice and caring Sam had turned out, especially in comparison with his father.
I had looked up some things over abused children, to see if there was anything I could do to help Sam. There was one fact that I had glossed over, it had not held my interest back then. It had not been that important at the time but now it was more relevant; abused children sometimes have a hard time communicating with others. Sam's communication skill when he had gotten stressed in the past few months had deteriorated to bullying - like father, like son.
You are just being judgmental, you are trying your best to dislike him. But I have to admit some part of it was true. Sam was just human, he had his faults as well as his strengths. He had been put in the unenviable position of leading a pack of werewolves in a time of major conflict. He was doing the best he could, it was not his fault he was not equipped for the job. It was almost better that he had imprinted on Emily, because of the imprinting he would not be capable of pushing her around.
Suddenly a strange noise came from above, I lifted my head in the direction of the sound but nothing was there. I had the funny feeling that something was watching me, I had begun to listen to this voice more in the past few months. There was something about being dunked into the supernatural world that made you think twice about the other things. How did I know that the only things existed were werewolves and vampires? I didn't, there could be other things as well. Witches and ghosts. Hell at this point it would not surprise me to see a flying saucer hovering above the cliffs.
I stood up and went to look but could see nothing, I could smell nothing. The sound had come from a really tall tree, I was not going to be able to climb it in wolf form and I could see nothing there to warrant me trying to climb it naked.
Creeped out by the incident I figured now was a good time to head home.
"What are you retarded or something? She could have seen you?" the man furiously whispered to the woman next to him.
"Duh, invisible here, how can she have seen me?" the woman rolled her eyes at him. "You are far to paranoid about this, you need to relax a little. You know ..." she made a gesture with her hands to explain to him exactly what he should do to relief some stress. "Though with as wound up as you are, you are probably running the risk of going blind."
"I can push you out of this tree, there is no one around to here you." The man replied before jumping. An outside observer would have been concerned at the man just flinging himself off of a large tree. About a foot from the ground he seemed to stop, float for a few seconds before gently taking a step from midair down to the ground. The woman was almost instantly next to him, using the same method to descend from the tree.
"Are you going to see her home?" she asked looking in the direction the wolf had gone.
The man followed her gaze, his pale green eyes reflecting too much of the dim light to be human. "I will follow her anywhere."
A/N: All right ladies, sorry I was slacking, but I have houseguest right now. AKA had to clean the house so that it was presentable. Eeek, I was having trouble uploading this chapter. Obviously I finally got it. I hate it when fanfic website is not working properly.
TifffersStar1989: Glad you liked the chapter, Phil is very subtle in his actions and he tends to handle Leah with kid gloves. She thinks that he is secretive but he has pretty much told her a great deal, he just used a language that he knew she would not understand. Yeah the spicy sauce was pretty funny, especially since he tainted yummy food (I think that would be the ultimate sin among wolves).
Ms animegoddess: She made even more progress, I know that Bella thought Sam was great and all in the books, but really he was a bully to me. I so would have put Seth in charge as soon as possible. Though that is biased on my part because I happen to adore Jailbait aka Seth. Emily pregnant? We shall see :D.
ABarbieStory: Glad you are liking the small bits. I added a little bit more at the end, just cause you like the hints. Yes, yes, Phil is awesome and we all want to take him home so that we can insert scene that is too much for even M rating here.
Twilgihter: :( Hello?. Joking, I hope everything is cool. So I am a worrywart.