28 - Moving On
I ran through the woods as quietly as possible, the thick carpet of moss underneath my feet muffled the sounds of my large paws hitting the ground as I weaved through the large trees. The canopy of trees above me prevented most of the rain from falling directly onto the ground, instead the leaves collected the water together into much larger droplets which them made a constant dripping sound when they finally hit the ground - I was not complaining since the sound was masking my movements when I missed the moss and hit the soggy leaves instead. The hemlocks and firs were very dense in this region of the woods which meant there was very little light that made it through the thick canopy, again something that was working in my favor. Not that there was that much light to begin with, the sun had set several hours ago and the heavy cloud cover blocked even the meager light of the stars. My normally useful wolf eyes could barely make out anything in front of me, everything was a blur of shadows. Even my sense of smell was limited because the scents had been washed away by the steady rain of the past couple of days. I was running practically blind but that meant that he was as well, I was hoping that my sense of smell was better and that I could somehow pick up his trail.
Occasionally I ran across a trail of a rabbit or squirrel but I was not interested in them, I was hunting bigger game. Finding the trail of my target was a little harder but after nearly an hour of searching I finally located a relatively fresh scent, wasting several minutes I determined which way he was going. I looped around the trail trying to cut him off from the south - my speed was another advantage so if I could run around him and blindside him I might be able to take him down. Hopefully he would not hear me coming at him, I was moving so fast along the ground that I was nothing more than a grey blur.
I scored big time when I spotted him running through the trees, he was not looking in my direction which could mean he did not know where I was. My view of him in the dim light was monochromatic as his image flitted in and out as he ran past the trees. I calculated his trajectory while trying to time my attack just right.
In an extra burst of speed I veered right in order for my path to cross with his, pushing myself to go even faster than ever I sped towards my prey. Running past a rock I twisted to use it as a bouncing board so that I could jump on his back. But I somehow missed and landed awkwardly rolling to the side as I tried to avoid smashing my face into the dirt. How could I possibly have missed when my timing was right on? I rolled back on my feet and peered into the gloom.
I heard a soft chuckle to my left, turning in the appropriate direction I saw him casually leaning against a tree, smiling with full dimples. "Hi there Princess looking for something?"
Jerk. I thought at him as loudly as possible, sometimes he heard my louder thoughts without even trying. It was a certainty that have received my mental message because he laughed louder this time as he came towards me. The bastard must have jumped right before I tried to tackle him, otherwise his cute ass would have been mine. He was such a cheater and I was so going to call him out on it.
"Are you ready to start heading home? It is getting late and you do need your beauty sleep. Not that you are not pretty enough as it it." Phil did not wait for me to answer instead he took off his backpack and pulled out the small bag containing my clothes.
I padded over to him in wolf form I was nearly eye to eye with him when on all fours. At first I had been bothered by the thought of shifting in front of him, maybe he would think my wolf form kind of creepy. He was kind of dating a girl who could turn into a giant wolf, that fact would have bothered most guys. I should have known better, Phil pretty much accepted me no matter what. He treated me like Leah no matter how furry I might be; his nonchalant behavior around me when I was a six foot tall hairy behemoth was what I needed to stop feeling self conscious.
In retaliation for his earlier cheating I licked him with my big wolf tongue all the way across one side of his face. I immediately grabbed my pack of clothes and took a few steps back to see the full effect of my prank. Part of my reason for being this obnoxious was to harass him but the other reason was that I also absolutely loved the way he tasted - that was probably wrong but I did not really care.
"Ewww dog breath," he told me wiping off the drool with the sleeve of his jacket. I gave a little doggie snicker and ran into the woods to phase. I found all my clothes including my underwear neatly folded inside, hmmm I wonder if Phil liked my undies - these were my new ones from Aunt Katie, the scraps of lace. I certainly had not spent the time to fold them this neatly, so he must have done it.
Phil was sitting on the rock that I had unsuccessfully used as a bouncing board, my socks and shoes were in his lap. I sat down next to him and put on my shoes.
He stood up brushed the dirk off his backside before offering me his arm. "Shall we go home, darlin'?" He said in a fake Southern accent. When he wanted to he could sound authentically Southern, I was always freaked out by it when he did. I liked his British accent better, skinny little white boy with a British accent did not do it for me but when Phil did it with his dark skin it sounded really exotic.
"Of course," I tried to mimic his accent but failed. I wrapped my arm around his and we started walking back towards the house.
"You are getting better at this." He told me after a few minutes of silence.
"I almost had you, if you had not jumped you would have been Phil pancake." I told him, we had done this a few times before; the first time I had not put forth any effort. I had foolishly overestimated my ability to track Phil, I spend hours searching through the woods. Finally giving up, I went home to find him drinking tea sitting next to the kitchen counter. Phil had chided me for my unwillingness to give it my all then he offered me the cookies he had baked while waiting for me. I had learned to always give my all when playing with Phil, since it had become apparent that when he played these games he brought all his millennia of experience to the table.
"What time is it?" I finally asked after allowing him to move the wet fern out of my way. He always treated me like a dainty girl, it made me feel nice - especially since I was over six feet tall and could pick up small cars with my bare hands.
"Close to midnight I would think." The smile could be heard in his tone, I looked up at him suspiciously wondering what he was up to.
"Phil?" I said his name as a question.
"Yes darling?" He asked, his face a picture of innocence. I did not buy this for a second. He let go of my hand and started to run at full speed. "Race you to the house," he told me over his shoulder.
It took me a moment to realize he had declared a race, I was not worried, even in human form I could outrun Phil so long as he did not do the jumping thing. I quickly caught up with him and then ran at full speed all the way to the house. I was feeling a lot more comfortable running around in the woods. Phil and the other family had caught four of the seven vampires that had grabbed me, unfortunately the psychopath scientist was not one of them.
"We had a nice ... conversation... but they did not know anything about the whereabout of the others. They were just the lackeys and knew nothing of the doctor's plans." Those were Phil's exact words when he came home after the family had caught the first vampire. For some reason conversation is not what I would have called what they did to that vampire. They brought me a picture as well as a piece of clothing of the leech so that I could confirm this was the one that had taken me.
The vampire had several chunks missing from his body and looked decidedly lopsided, his face said he would have wet his pants if that could be possible - apparently they had already started on their 'conversation' when the picture was taken. At first I had been very determined to be around when they caught the leeches but after seeing the look of horror on his face in the picture I decided I was just going to let Phil and the family do their jobs. The picture reiterated the fact that Phil was not always sunshine and smiles. I had to remind myself that these guys had kidnapped me to be raped, and they had kidnapped and murdered at least one girl. These vampires were not going to be given the courtesy of a warning, they had attacked family and that was the end of it. The notion that I was considered family had been intimidating at first, but I realized it was partially as a means to protect Phil. Kendrick especially seemed to take my safety very seriously, but I could not blame him for being overly cautions since according to Blossom he had lost his mate.
My pack had taken the credit for the kills, at least as far as Sam was concerned. Jake and the boys were still pissed that they had not been given even a little bit of the action, the family had taken care of everything before they had called Jake to let him know that part of the job was finished.
I came back to the present as I quickly headed for the side door that led to the kitchen - very rarely did anyone use the front door in this house. Phil had lost the race by so much that he was nowhere to be seen, with a feeling of glee for winning at least this part of a game I moved inside to get something to eat while I waited for him to catch up.
"Hi there Leah," I heard a voice coming from behind the opened fridge door, for a moment I was pissed because I was afraid Phil had cheated and had made it home before me. But the voice had been clear and high, not the deep rumbly one of my boyfriend. When the door closed a little I saw Tiffany standing in front of the fridge, she was only wearing panties of course. It was a pain when you knew that you really should not be staring at a person's ass but that is what you found yourself doing.
Tiffany was close to seven feet tall, her body was so slender that some might worry about her being anorexic. If you had to use one word to describe her it would have to be long. She had long willowy legs, long lithe arms, long graceful fingers, and a long narrow face that looked a little too angular to be considered truly beautiful. Her long straight blonde hair went to her knees, and seemed out of place with her dark brown eyes. Her skin was not as dark as some of her other cousins, it contained a hint of color but not the caramel hue of Phil and his cousin Kendrick.
The past couple of weeks since moving in with Phil had been interesting to say the least. Since this vampire group was being elusive Phil had asked Tiffany to come help, so she and her parter had just showed up one day and took over a bedroom suite. There was enough room since Kendrick and his easily forgotten partner were currently staying in the cabin.
This was not the first time that I had witnessed the sight of Tiffany strolling through the kitchen in nothing but her lingerie. One night after Phil and I had gone out to take advantage of the rare clear night we walked into the kitchen to find her wearing only a pay of boy shorts panties - to say I was shocked was an understatement. I may have spent a minute or two starring with my mouth hanging open, though it could have been the fact that she was so tall. Phil had walked past her like it was an everyday occurrence to find a naked girl in his kitchen, I had since learned that it was not that uncommon. Phila did not really wear clothes around the house either, but at least she put on some sort of top with her underwear. Phil was the only one who bothered with clothes, sometimes I think he only did it because of my presence.
"Hi Tiffany, I guess Jasper is coming over soon." I told her with a sigh.
Tiffany had somehow taken Jasper Cullen under her wing and was training him; I really did not want to know for what purpose, some things should remain a mystery. Seriously, Jasper was a military man with years of experience and to have someone actually train him was very disturbing. When Jasper came to see Tiffany for a training session, she tended to take off most of her clothes. When I had called her out on it she explained her reasoning: since Jasper was old school southern boy it really bugged him to see her naked. She was trying to prepare him to deal with any situation, even a naked opponent.
"Do you fight a lot naked people?" I had asked her with a laugh when I found her in the kitchen in a hot pink Hello Kitty thong.
"I am trying to make him uncomfortable, so he is distracted, he needs to learn how to fight with distractions." She replied, seemingly unconcerned about her lack of attire.
Tiffany was currently pouring what looked to be heavy cream into the remaining half gallon of milk.
"Hey some of us might not like it messed up like that." I protested, even though I knew it would be useless.
"Not a problem, I already wrote milk on the shopping list," she told me with a smirk as she picked up the gallon jug of milk and drank it all. For a moment I considered introducing her to Paul, but then I reminded myself he had already found his mate. Though I would have thought it was absolutely impossible I had found that Tiffany ate more than Paul, neither of the two had anything on Kendrick though - that boy could pack it away like nobody's business.
"Have you ever heard of this nifty little thing called a cup?" I reminded her as she chugged the milk mixture straight from the container.
"Have you ever starved to death?" She asked me, I assumed it was a rhetorical question. Obviously since I was standing right next to her breathing I had not starved to death. She continued when she noticed I was not going to answer her question. "I have and it really hurts, so pardon me for trying to stay alive."
Phil had explained about Tiffany after I initially met her, she was one of the death squad, like Kendrick. This was why she needed so many calories to maintain her bod under normal circumstances, it got worse if she got hurt. I was assuming that she was anticipating getting hurt training Jasper and was pre-treating herself so that she could have the reserves to heal herself.
"Well you have fun with Jasper," I told her while hearing Phil come into the house. My need for a snack forgotten now that he was back. "Hey there slowpoke," I told him kissing him lightly on the mouth. I may have possibly rubbed the front of my body across his as I moved up to give him the kiss. I felt his body stiffen a little bit, almost like he was bracing himself for an attack. Ever since that one day that his parents had interrupted our fun Phil had kept things mostly innocent, there was lots of kissing but the clothes stayed on. It was starting to annoy the hell out of me, I really was curious as to what he looked like naked. Well if I was being honest I wanted to move things along a little more quickly, Phil on the other hand seemed determined to slow down the pace. I never though it would be a guy that was telling me to slow down; so I had to settle myself for 'accidentally' brushing my body up against him.
"Leah." I heard Phil tell me with a stern voice, as he moved away from me.
"Let me go get my pajamas on." I told him quickly heading upstairs to brush my teeth and wash my face some flannel pajama bottoms and an old tshirt. Sexy nightwear it was not, but it was comfortable to sleep in.
We had a routine down by now, Phila called us the old married couple, but it worked for us so she could just kiss my rear. After whatever outdoor thing we did to burn off some stress we would settle in one of the large couches in the living room and watch something on TV.
Tonight Phil was already waiting for me on the couch, his large feet were up on the wide ottoman as he pushed the buttons on the remote he looked searched through the recorded things. That is what we usually watched because honestly there was nothing worth watching on at midnight. I picked up one of the extra blankets that had been neatly folded across a chair before settling down next to Phil on the couch. The foolish man helped me pull soft blanket across our lover bodies as I snuggled into his side. Unbeknownst to him, I had not been given the perfect opportunity to play without being seen. He was a very pathetic psychic is he did not see this coming, but it looked like his concentration was focused on finding something to watch.
Sometime in the past few weeks I had become what some might call a cock tease. Phil had been insistent that we take things slow, especially since it was all new to me - Phil had spent the past several months getting used to the idea of us getting together eventually, but he thought it would be unfair to me to just jump into a physical relationship without dating for a while.
I could see his point but at the same time my body did not understand why we had to wait. My imagination had gone into overdrive, my unsatisfied libido was working overtime now that I had pushed away the darkness that had surrounded me ever since the first time I shifted into a wolf. My body was making some serious demands and my mind was starting to give in - much time was wasted imagining what it would feel like to rub naked against Phil's hard body. At first I assumed it might just be that I was horny in general and any body would do, but then during a conversation with one of classmates I learned otherwise. Peter had been somewhat flirty with me and had even gone so far as to ask me on a date, I could not tell why he had bothered since he had never received any encouragement from me. At one point in a conversation he got too close to me, and I got a big dose of his scent. For once he was not doused with his usual aftershave but even then he smelled off, his natural scent was beyond unpleasant - it was off-putting. The wolf instinct in me reared up and my hackles rose, this man was too close to me and I did not like it, I had to cough to disguise the growl rumbling deep in my throat at his proximity. Phil was the only one that my wolf instincts enjoyed getting close to, his was the only body I wasted to molest.
My body and my mind seemed to be together on this one. They both wanted Phil, my body had already decided on Phil my mind knew what it wanted but I was still a little uncertain. Breaking up with Sam had really done a number on me, I was no longer that innocent girl that could throw my heart into the fray without any worries.
Just because we were doing things slowly did not mean that nothing was going on between us. I managed to get in at least one serious make out session per day, despite the fact that both of our hectic schedules really did not allow that much time together. I was not averse to doing a little bit of groping even if it did not really lead anywhere, if I was going to be in a perpetual state of arousal I was going to make sure I had company.
Phil had started working at one of the teaching hospitals in Seattle as well as opening his own private clinic, I don't know exactly what he did. I knew he was a plastic surgeon but for some reason I got the impression he did a lot more than just boob jobs. I think he was working with Carlisle Cullen on some sort of surgery technique involving stem cells, Phil had tried to explain it to me once but all I got out of it was that he was trying to grow new skin. Phil's work hours tended to be insanely long and he was on call most weekends.
"Won't people get suspicious of the long hours you work?" I finally asked him one day. He had left for work before five in the morning and had not returned until past seven in the evening.
"Most surgeons keep these hours, this is why doctors tend to have a shorter life expectancy than the average person." He told me with a smile. It was a good thing he did not need that much sleep or I might as well have been living alone.
I figured out one of the main reasons he wanted me to live with him not long after Phil started working, we needed to be in the same house so that we could actually see each other. As it was I had to somewhat alter my sleep schedule in order to actually spend any time whatsoever with my 'boyfriend'. I had learned to take a nap earlier in the day so that I could stay awake and spend some time with him. During the weekends, unless he was called in for an emergency he was all mine. Well almost all mine, I still had to work at the restaurant - there was that car loan that I needed to repay.
Phil was bothered by my long hours and he worried about it interfering with my school, he spent several days grumbling slightly under his breath. It was only when I pointed out that I was a big girl and could make my own decisions he let it drop. I noticed he was big about letting me make my own mistakes. It was kind of nice that he usually did not say I told you so when my poor decisions caught up with me.
Most nights I fell asleep next to Phil sometime around one am and I would wake up in my own bed the next day, when the evil alarm went off.
"Do you mind watching this movie?" Phil asked me about fifteen minutes in. I had not really been paying that much attention. My mind had been too busy plotting my finger's path up Phil's leg. I had started by inconspicuously laying my hand on his knees and had slowly moved up and down. Shifting to make myself more comfortable against him I took a deep breath. I loved the way Phil smelled - it was my favorite smell in the world, especially when it was combined with the scent of pine, rain and outdoors like it was right now.
"What oh sure, I don't really care." I told him as my hand moved slowly up and down the inside of his thigh, with every sweep it got a little closer to the spot that I never reached. He might be able to keep his true emotions out of his voice and off his face but he could not control certain parts of his anatomy, and that part was telling me he was not so unmoved by my caress. I could also feel his body heating up to the point where it was getting warmer than mine, yet another sign that he was not as oblivious as he let on.
"There is this really good world war two documentary if you wanted to watch that instead." He told me in a serious voice, almost like he did not notice what I was doing. Liar, liar pants on fire. Well it would have been nice to have his pants on fire, then I could have helped him take them off.
"Sure, if you want." I answered only half paying attention to what he was saying. I was more interested in what I was doing to him, I had never actually been able to touch the real thing skin to skin. Phil always made sure there was a barrier of clothing between us, needless to say I really wanted to know what it would feel like. I had not even seen him without a shirt on, I think he was doing it to drive me insane with the little sliver of bare skin I would occasionally get to see. Overall I got the impression that most of his body was fairly hairless, I knew there was a little trail of dark hair that went down from his belly button but unfortunately I had not been given an opportunity to pursue it any further.
"All right Leah." I heard him turn off the TV as he turned his body towards me. I had nearly reached the good spot, just inches away from his denim covered groin - not that I would have actually touched it. I opened my mouth to protest the fact that he had shifted his body away from mine. He did not give me enough time to say anything, instead he swooped down and took advantage of my open mouth. His tongue immediately started to make its usual foray into my mouth. This was so much more interesting than watching the movie. Moving quickly to straddle him, I wrapped myself around him pulling his head closer to mine as our tongues battle is out.
Phil lifted his head away from me for a moment, then he started to kiss his way down my throat before he latched on and started sucking the spot where my neck met with my shoulders. I instantly started squirming in his lap, but he knew what he was doing to me - my neck and ears were his favorite spots to suck on. Phil had located this sensitive spot fairly early on and tended to spent a great deal of time on my neck. It was a good thing that I was a quick healer because otherwise my neck would be filled with hickies.
I was in the middle of a groan when I heard them coming in. I would have smelled them even had they not come stomping through the front door.
"Eeew, get a room you two and get it over with." I heard Emmet's booming voice.
I guess Jasper had brought a friend tonight. I got up out of Phil's lap but not before I gave his neck one last lick, I really like the way he tasted. My perverted mind immediately went down south and wondered if he tasted this good in other places. I looked around really glad they had not brought Edward with them.
"Evening boys," Phil told them in a completely nonchalant tone, he did have to adjust himself when he stood up. He used me as a cover, so I was the only one that noticed how tight those jeans were over his crotch. Hmmm I really needed to see what he had in there.
"You know if you want to watch something you have to turn on the TV first." Emmet continued.
"Or you can go out to the movies and make out in the back like the rest of us." I heard Angus interrupt. He was Tiffany's partner and he actually came from the same planet that her father was from. He was a little taller than Tiffany and had the same long and lean look, he was a little more muscled than she was. They shared the deep brown eyes, but his hair was a straight raven black compared to her blonde.
"I don't like the movies." I replied sticking my tongue out at the big vampire, needless to say my interactions with the vampires that lived close by had seriously improved.
Phil and I had tried the conventional dating method. I spent a great deal of time researching which type of movie would be best for him, comedy or action - I steered away from the chick flicks. We got to the theater and that is when everything went wrong. First of all someone had thrown up and we could both smell the rancid stench as soon as we entered the theater. Since we were already there we put up with that until the movie began, and then the blaring noise started. I don't know how even people with normal hearing could possibly tolerate the level of sound. We gave up even before the movie had actually began and had gone home. That was the first and last time we had gone to the movies.
"Tiffany should be out back," Phil pointed out as he neatly folded the blanket we had been using.
"Yeah, why did you bother coming in?" I grumbled at them.
"Maybe we just wanted to see our favorite wolf," Emmett told me with a big evil smile. Giving up I headed up to bed, that deserted island was starting to sound better and better.
The next morning I growled at my alarm, I swear it went off earlier and earlier the closer it got to Friday. I had class this morning so I had to hurry, especially considering History was my major and the professor did take roll. It did not help that the commute to school had vastly increased since I moved out of the dorms, I now needed a good forty five minutes instead of the ten minutes it had taken to walk across campus.
I ran downstairs ready to grab something quick when I noticed Cindy was waiting for me with an aluminum foil wrapped package and a thermos.
"I love you." I told her as I accepted my breakfast before running to the garage to get my car.
Cindy was actually completely human, at least as far as I knew, but the way things had been going these days she could have been a witch or something along those lines.
She was a single mother of two that had been doing odd cleaning jobs to keep her kids fed and clothed, Phil had given her a better paying and more stable position of housekeeper. It was a good deal all around, she would drop of her kids in the morning and then pick them up once they were done with school. In between that time she worked for Phil, she was a little early today - it must be carpool day, and her friend takes her kids for her.
CIndy's duties were pretty much to make sure the house did not fall apart, she did not do any heavy cleaning or take care of the garden outside, instead she did the everyday maintenance of the house. She kept the fridge stocked with food, did some light cooking and mainly kept the house picked up. The major cleaning was done by some company that came in once a week, I had learned early on to pick up the things off the floor or god only knows where my stuff would end up. The gardening was done by Sassy, at least so I was told, I never really saw her but obviously the beds remained weeded and as the weather got a little warmer new plants had appeared in the new beds.
Cindy was a very nice woman doing the best she could under the circumstances, as much as I admired her for how hard she worked I would never in a million years want to be her. She had gotten pregnant as a teenager, I got the impression that she had absolutely no help from her children's fathers. So here she was a high school dropout working her butt off to make ends meet, I was glad that Phil was giving her a decent wage, she had started talking about taking some night classes this coming fall. It might have have been somewhat of an ugly thought on my part but I was glad not to be stuck in her situation, and I started to push a little harder in school after meeting her.
"You were almost late again." Jenny told me when I plopped down in a chair next to her in class. A normal human would have been out of breath from my mad dash across campus, but I had not even truly exerted myself.
"I was up a little late last night." I told her with a slight blush. You would think that someone as dark skinned as I was could hide their blushes better.
"I can imagine what you were doing. So when are you going to officially introduce me to your boyfriend?" She asked me with a sly grin probably noticing my blush.
"I don't know he is kind of a busy man." I told her trying to find an excuse. Luckily for me class began before she could question me further.
I had work that day so I did not bother going back to the house, instead I went to Phila's old apartment to study, it was still fully furnished - anything that had been moved to the house had been replaced by some plain but sturdy pieces. Apparently they never got rid of any of their houses, something about always having a place to stay. I was also pretty sure that Angus used this place as well - he had set up a small office in one of the bedrooms.
Instead of studying like I should have I took a nap on the comfy couch and took a nap, the only thing I was behind on was Biology and I was sure that Phil would be quizzing me on it soon enough.
Things were busy as usual at work, but I was able to find the time to talk to Mr. Peters. I needed the next weekend off so that I could attend Emily and Sam's wedding, for some reason I had thought that the date was June instead of April and had forgotten to ask for time off. I inquired if there was a way that I could take a couple of lighter weeks, my savings were in relatively good condition and I would need the extra time for studying for exams. Mr. Peters was kind enough to agree to what I was asking so long as I picked up a few extra days after my exams were over.
That night after I had gone to bed, alone yet again, I could not sleep. Instead I thought of everything that had changed in the past three weeks and everything that had not. To my infinite relief moving in with Phil hand not altered our friendship - no matter what Phil was my friend. He was the kind that I could rely on when the shit hit the fan, and knowing my luck that would happen quite often. Nothing would ever change the fact that Phil would be there for me no matter what, that was one thing I could be sure of; dating Phil had only strengthened this knowledge.
As for dating Phil it was far different from what I had with Sa, there was almost no way to compare the two. Phil had his faults, like the fact that he was a manipulative bastard at times, but I knew he usually meant well and when I pushed back he would let me have my way. The important part was that I was aware of some of Phil's imperfections and had not looked at him with rose colored glasses and ignored anything I did not like about him. I was older and a little bit wiser now, the other part that had changed was the fact that Phil was not the type of guy that could be easily fitted into a mold - he was going to be himself no matter how much I tried to push him to be something else. We did not agree on everything but I respected him enough to listen to his point of view, and I had been more than a little surprised when I realized he was willing to listen to my views and opinions.
For example there was the very tiny detail that I had not told my mother about Phil yet, she knew I was seeing some man but I had not told her his name as of yet. Phil kept encouraging me to tell her, saying she would eventually find out about us. I knew she would and it would only only be worse the longer I kept it a secret but I was very hesitant to give my mother full disclosure.
It was not that I wanted to hide my relationship with Phil because I felt ashamed of Phil, in fact he was an amazing man. We had reached a great balance right now, and I was reluctant to let anyone else into the little bubble we had built around ourselves in the past couple of weeks. I could be myself and so could he when we were together, when we started interacting with others there were secrets we were supposed to be keeping. Like the fact that he was not human or the fact that I was wolf, because I had not imprinted on him I was technically not supposed to tell him I was a wolf. There was also the feeling that if I let myself I could fall for this man completely; I had not said the words even to myself, I wanted to be sure before I did so. I liked being around him, we sort of fit together well; our lives had meshed a lot better than I had anticipated.
Using the 'L' word was something to avoid at this point, I was afraid that something bad would happen if I did so, almost like I would jinx this. Every time things had looked like they would be going well fate had totally screwed me. I know it sounded superstitious, but hello, I was a werewolf...straight out of the supernatural.
So maybe a very small part of my need for secrecy had to do with the fact that I was a coward and I did not want to explain to my mother that I was living with him. I even gave up the weekend of my birthday with Phil, instead I had gone back to the Rez just in case my mother wanted to do something like come down and surprise me. She sure would have been the one surprised when she learned that I was not living at the dorm. Jake and the rest of my pack knew where I was, they were not bothered by it much considering the leeches that were running around the area.
I got lucky for my birthday weekend, my mother did not have time to question me. Instead of my birthday being made a big deal of I got to attend a bridal shower for Emily. I thought to the back to that weekend and let the memory wash over me once again, I had done the right thing regarding Emily and Sam - sort of.
The bridal shower was kind of nice, all of my extended family was in attendance. Well all the females at least, which made the party very loud. Some of my the older women were a little hard of hearing, not that they would ever admit it. We had learned to accommodate their special needs by answering their questions in a very loud voice.
"Oh, Emily you never told us how you and Sam met." One of the distant aunts interrupted the conversation as we sat around stuffing ourselves with the food that I had not been allowed to help make.
There would have been a time not so long ago that this question would have felt like a punch to the stomach, it was a testament to how much I had moved forward in the past few months that my only reaction was a small smirk. This was going to be interesting, how exactly were they going to explain that first magical moment? The one where Emily met her best friend's boyfriend and suddenly he was following her around declaring his eternal love.
Emily's face which had been practically glowing with all the attention she had been receiving lost her bright smile. My mother's eyes immediately moved towards me, concern written all over her face. I simply shrugged and leaned more comfortably against the wall, it had not been lost on me that I was mimicking Phil's favorite position for observing a potentially volatile situation.
It was actually Emily's mother finally broke the silence and answered the question, or more like did not answer it. She knew about the fact that Sam was my boyfriend but she had either not been told or had chosen to ignore the fact that we had still been dating when he started courting Emily. "Well you know Leah was having a hard time and Emily came by to make sure she would be all right, and well one thing led to another and my Emily and Sam hit it off."
It seemed that my sweet aunt was willing to throw me under the bus, at least she was not determined to air out all of the family laundry. She went on to tell them how my father had passed away and how Emily had tried stayed to help me - I finally discovered the lies my dear cousin had told her mother. It was interesting to note my aunt did not once mention to the crowd how her daughter and future son-in-law had pretty much broken my poor little teenage heart. I found myself looking over my shoulder to see if Phil also thought this tactic was hilarious, but he was not there. I really did miss Phil, maybe I should have told my mother about him, then I could have brought him with me. I had to remind myself that he could not have been here with me, this was a women only party. But Phil was a big boy, he could have handled them.
Soon the conversation got back to the right topic. I quickly got tired of the spectacle of the mother of the bride going on about the wonderful Emily and Sam as well as sharing cute childhood stories. Even watching Emily squirm had lost the power to amuse me. It took me a moment to realize why, somehow along the way I had forgiven Emily for what she had done with Sam. I could not really blame her, it was hard to resist absolute devotion and love. However, just because I forgave her did not mean that I would forget about it. We would never be best friends again, I could never give her my trust after what she had done last time.
I do not think I could even be her friend again; I had changed too much in the past year while she had essentially stayed the same. She may have heard about some of the things that had happened second hand from Sam, but she did not know what it was like to fight for you life against a newborn army. Emily did not know the strength it took not to run away and instead face certain death when the Volturi came. Most of all she could not know what it means to have all your dreams and hopes die almost instantly; or what it felt like to slowly claw your way out of that dark hole and learn to dream again. No I could never be friends with her again, we no longer had anything in common.
I left the house and walked outside past the yard to get away from it all and digest the conclusions I had just reached. It felt like a weight I did not even know I had been carrying had been lifted off my chest.
This is where Sam found me, leaning against one of the old trees behind his mother's house.
"Do you remember how I used to wait for you against this tree, and you would try to sneak up on me and kiss me?" I asked with a smile, I could not be certain but that is how I had received my first kiss.
Sam had looked at me confused. "Are you all right?"
He must have been shocked that I was not releasing the inner bitch in me. "I am fine, why do you ask?" I was going to make him say it. If he wanted an answer he was going to have to ask me directly. This was a trick I had learned from Phil, I could tell Sam did not like it any better than I.
"Why are you being nice to me?" Sam asked in a very hesitant almost hushed voice.
"What? Am I not allowed to be nice to you?" So I was going to enjoy this a little longer before I let him off the hook, so to speak. If I was going to forgive Emily for the choices she made, I was most definitely going to have to forgive Sam.
"Is there something wrong with the party?" Sam asked looking over my shoulder towards the house, probably worried about Emily. Maybe he thought I was trying to distract him from what was going on at the house.
At one point his concern for Emily would have really irritated me. Instead I spent a moment looking at the man who had nearly broken me. No, that as not right, I had nearly broken me. I had put Sam in a position in my dreams without actually asking him if he wanted to be there; I gave him all those character traits and goals, the sad part was that I still did not know if those goals had been actually his or just part of my castle in the sky. I had place too many burdens on this boy's shoulders and when things got tough he could not handle it, again I wondered how long we would have lasted had he not imprinted on Emily.
"The old aunts are just talking about their medical problems." Sam said as he turned back to me, he must have been listening in on the conversation.
"What else are they supposed to be doing?" I asked him with a scoff, seriously all old women talked about was their arthritis and their grandkids.
"You never answered my question, why are you being nice to me?" Sam came back to his original question.
"What reason would I have for not being nice to you?" I asked wanting to make him say it.
"Ummm... well I did dump you for your best friend." He finally said it, I must say the boy had balls and I had to admire him for that.
"Oh that part, really you did me a favor." I told him in a nonchalant tone, waving my hand around in a dismissive notion. Months of agony waved away with one flick of my wrist.
"Did you start smoking pot in that big university of yours? Or is this the result more dangerous illicit drugs?" Sam asked looking at me suspiciously, he had come a little closer. Maybe he was seeing if my eyes were bloodshot and red from smoking the pot.
I recalled that one night with Phil, I should have known back then that I was his mate. I could not help but laugh a little at the memory. "Pot can be fun, especially when used for spiritual purposed," Wow I was starting to sound like Phil.
Sam's eyes suddenly got large as I admitted to smoking pot, he would never know it had only been one time.
I continued my speech. "I am just saying we had some good times together, but they would have ended eventually one way or another. I would have preferred it in a little more gently way, but I guess you figured that part out."
"So you are over me?" Sam said in a hopeful voice. Geez did he have to be that happy that I was no longer in love with him.
I opened my mouth to explain that I did not really think I had been in love with him in the first place; but that would probably hurt his feelings and I had wasted enough time trying to make him feel pain. Instead I wanted to go back to my mother's house and see if I could call Phil to convince him to join me tonight on a run.
"I forgive you Sam for what you did." I told him with a smile.
Only when Sam returned my smile did I give my parting shot. "But I will never forget." So I was still a little bit of a bitch. Sue me.
I smiled at the memory of Sam's face as I walked away from him. I never was able to convince Phil to come for a run with me that night, but he made up for it on Sunday night when I got home he had made me dessert. Can you say cheesecake?
A/N: This was fun to write, too bad I kept getting interrupted. Do you like how Leah is changing, how she is tying up loose ends and slowly maturing?
Ms Animegoddess: Sorry your life is hectic, and am glad that this helped. Your welcome for the recipe, I am glad you got it. This PM system gets me a little confused at times, I hit send and all of a sudden I am faced with an empty write your message box. Glad you like Phil's mom, she will get another chapter that will be all sorts of fun.
Jaime2772: Can't they just have sex already? Be glad I am not a prude like SM and they don't have to wait till marriage. As the saying goes: patience is a virtue...that most of us don't have.
ABarbieStory: Don't worry about reading this while watching kids, my problem is I try to write this while my kids are around and my daughter likes to read over my shoulder. Needless to say I don't want my six year old reading some of these scenes. :D
Twilighter: I am very dedicated to my deserts, trust me it was a very sad day when my oven broke. I keep meaning to go back to Jailbait I just can't get past this one spot, once I do the next chapter will be finished in a couple of days.
Connect2tjb: Glad you liked Phil's history, I am kind of hoping it made Leah feel like they are not that much different.