(It Was Almost) The First Time in Forever

By Ginny

Ch 7, the real chapter 7, excuse my posting of chapter 6 twice

I wake up to find I'm alone. I reach my hand out to Charlie's side of the bed, it's still warm. Bathroom door is open. I can hear him in the kitchen. The smell of fresh brewed coffee hits my nose as I grab my robe and head for the stairs.

By 8:45 we are on our way into the city. In my purse is the "list of doom" as Charlie was calling it over breakfast this morning.

By the time 10:15 rolls around it is obvious the doctor is already running late. Charlie is next to me sitting about as still as Ned does. Which is to say he is about to jump out of his skin. I put my hand on his knee in a silent gesture which says "sit still". He gives me an appropriately guilty look and picks up a random magazine.

His name is finally called and I let him go alone. I don't need to be there for the actual exam.

A little over an hour later we walk out of the office, our heads swimming with information. Dr. Matthews was less than happy, as expected. He wants Charlie to have some tests, cardiac catheterization, stress test among them. He needs to have blood work and a GI workup. Charlie got the lecture on eating right, exercising regularly and getting enough sleep, not to mention, cutting down on the bourbon. None of these things come as a surprise to us.

Blood pressure was much higher than it had been. Dr. Matthews changed the hypertension meds a little and wrote a script for Zoloft which should help with both depression and anxiety. He wasn't too keen on giving benzos to my husband and his self-proclaimed addictive personality. I whole heartedly agreed with him on that point.

There's not one thing specific thing he was worried about, it was more the "big picture" scenario which had him being very blunt with us. A trait he shares with my husband. Which is probably why Charlie and I both like him a lot.

His blunt words which stick with us as we walk to the AWM building hand in hand are, "things need to change now or there will be a major event in the near future."

It's just after 12:00 when we head into the building. The guards wave us in and I press the button for the elevator.

"You sure you want to go in, we could always make a run for it and go back home," I say, only half teasing.

"I need to go to work," Charlie answers simply and I'm not going to argue with him.

We are thankfully alone on the elevator. I straighten his striped bow tie and kiss him gently. We head to his office. I kick off my shoes and sink into the leather couch as he boots up his computer and spends a few minutes glancing at his email and talking with his secretary.

He heads for the rundown meeting at 12:30 with a little wave and a sad smile. I read for a while, enjoy the view of the city from his window and watch the ACN feed.

At 1:30 he and Mac come back to his office. After he promises to eat something resembling real food, Mac and I head out to lunch.

*****
"So Charlie wasn't exactly forthcoming with any information about his appointment this morning," Mac says after we're seated in a little coffee shop around the corner.

"Not surprising," I mutter as I pick up the menu. "Didn't exactly go well."

"Anything specific?" she asks as she reaches for her glass of water.

"Blood pressure is sky high, as you can well imagine. We got a warning of an undesirable event happening in the near future if things don't change."

"How did he take that?"

"Very quietly actually, which scares me to death."

The waitress comes to take our order, tuna sandwich for me, tomato soup and grilled cheese for Mac.

"Quietly?" Mac repeats. "That is scary."

"I'm watching him spiral downward before my eyes. He's an emotional and physical wreck. I've spent way too much time holding his head and rubbing his back in the bathroom this week. Half the time I have to fight to get him to eat. I've all but shoved Ambien in him for the past 6 weeks. I don't know how much more either of us can take. I'm exhausting trying to make sure he's still in one piece."

Mac reaches across the table and pats my hand, which turns out to be my undoing. She comes to the other side of the booth and sits next to me, handing me tissues from her purse.

I've calmed down by the time our food comes. Mac returns to her side of the booth and we start to eat, or more specifically I eat while Mac pushes her food around her plate, much like Charlie's been doing lately.

"Not hungry?"

"I don't know. Been feeling a little off these past few weeks. Guess I'm just missing my husband," she replies as she absently twirls her wedding ring on her finger. "I'm just exhausted too. We are quite the pair, I suppose," she laughs as she takes a small bite of her sandwich.

My text alert chimes and I fish my phone out.

-Sloan and Don are making me eat grilled chicken

I laugh a little and show the text to Mac before shooting off a quick text in reply.

-you'll live…probably longer

As soon as I hit SEND I regret it, maybe it's a little too soon to be joking like that.

-cute

Good he took my teasing okay.

"How's the retirement discussion going?" Mac asks.

"An actual discussion has yet to happen, but at least when I mention it Charlie doesn't go ballistic anymore. Beau was over Tuesday night, apparently he asked Charlie about retiring."

"How did that go?"

"He told Beau he was thinking about it. So I'm going to try to have an actual conversation this weekend."

"Would you like backup?" Mac offers.

I consider the offer for a minute. Maybe there is strength in numbers.

"I think I'd like that. You want to catch a ride home with Charlie on Friday? We can hang out by the pool on Saturday and double team him at some point."

"Sounds perfect," Mac replied with a smile. She picks at her sandwich a bit more and takes a couple bites of soup before she turns slightly green. Pushing the food away she takes a few deep breaths and a sip of water.

"Looking a little green there Mac," I point out. "You sure something else isn't up?" I ask with a wink.

She looks at me for a few seconds and I look of horror comes over her face.

"Oh my God," she mutters as she whips out her phone and opens the calendar app. "No, can't be, there's no way." She holds up her fingers, clearly counting the weeks and/or months.

I wave the waitress over for our check, while Mac excuses herself to go to the restroom.

We walk back to the AWM building, the fresh air seems to help Mac a little and her color looks better by the time we get on the elevator.

Mac heads to her office, probably to freak out a little. I head up to Charlie's office.

"Is here in there?" I ask his secretary as I walk past her desk.

"I actually think he might have fallen asleep. He didn't pick up the phone a minute ago."

"Well, a nap's not the worst idea he's had today," I reply with a little smile as I quietly open the door to his office.

She was correct, he's in his chair, feet on the desk, snoring softly. The remains of his healthy lunch are on his desk, as is a glass of what I assume is bourbon. I'm actually afraid to wake him for fear he will startle out of the chair and end up on the floor, not exactly what we need today. I just sit on the couch and flip through a magazine.

At 3:40 I realize he has a rundown meeting in 20 minutes and he's still sound asleep. Just as I'm deciding the best way to wake him, which won't result in him ending up on the floor, his cell vibrates and he wakes instantly. Luckily he does realize he's in his desk chair and doesn't make any large, sudden movements. He glances at the readout while he wipes his mouth as there is a very good chance he was drooling.

"Hey, sleepy," I tease as I cross the room. He drops his feet to the floor and scoots his chair back a little, giving me room to lean against the edge of his desk in front of him. Scooting forward again he leans into me, head on my stomach, arms wrapped around me. I kiss the top of his head and smooth down his hair. "You okay?"

"I don't know," he admits. "How was lunch?"

"Good, had a nice chat."

"About me I suppose."

"Among other things. I invited Mac to come stay Friday night. Hope that's okay."

"Of course it is. We can have Katie and the boys over Saturday too. I'll grill for everyone," he offers, making no effort to move.

"As comfortable as this is now, you have a meeting," I remind him as I rub his back a little. "How late are you staying tonight?"

"Not late, probably leave after News Night. You want to just stay here and wait for me?"

"Sounds perfect," I agree as he sits up. I straighten his bowtie, kiss his cheek and send him on his merry way.

I spend the next two hours reading and relaxing. Charlie pops in a few times to check on me. We go out to grab a snack around 6:30. Food was my idea, not his, but he didn't protest and he did eat something.

At 7:55 we head to the control room to watch the broadcast. It's been a while since I've watched from this vantage point. It's odd to see Sloan up there with the News Night logo. She's been awesome these last few weeks but I know there's nothing more in the world she'd rather do than go back to her own show and return News Night back to its rightful anchor.

Halfway through the broadcast Don comes in and stands next to me in the back. It's clear to me he's much more interested in the anchor than the content. By the look on his face I can tell he really is completely smitten by the lovely Miss Sabbith.

Sloan signs off and Don scoots by me to go around and meet her at the anchor desk.

Charlie meets me at the back of the control room with a quick kiss. He throws his arm around my shoulders and we stand and watch Don and Sloan for a minute. Don's leaning against the anchor desk talking with his hands. She's clearly hanging on every word. She reaches out to put her hand on his hip and he tucks a lock of hair behind her ear. They are oblivious to the fact they are still in the middle of the studio.

It's absolutely adorable.

Charlie lets out a big sigh and leans over to whisper in my ear. "Get me out of here, I'm done." All of the sudden he just looks and sounds exhausted. We say some quick goodbyes, hug Mac and I lead him into the bullpen. I deposit him at a random desk while I got up to his office to grab our bags.

As he probably does most nights lately, Charlie sleeps a good deal of the way home. I nudge him awake as Chris turns the car into the driveway.

"You going to bed?" I ask as he shrugs out of his jacket.

"I don't know," he mutters as he heads for the kitchen. He sits at the island, propping his chin up in one hand.

I turn the tea kettle on and hand him the basket of teabags. He picks out what he wants and unwraps it. He takes the mug I hand him with a tired little smile.

"So we didn't really talk about the appointment," I start carefully. I have no idea if he's actually in the mood or in the right state of mind to have this conversation.

"It was pretty scary," he sighs as he puts his hands in his lap and slumps over a little. He fiddles with his wedding ring, not looking up at me.

I cross the room and reach to tip up his chin so he does look at me. "I'll start making some appointments tomorrow," I offer. He nods in agreement. "Where are the prescriptions?"

"Uh, jacket pocket I think," he answers after taking a few seconds to remember. I find them tucked in the inside pocket of his jacket. I leave them on the counter so I can take them to the drug store in the morning. "You look exhausted. I don't think this is the time to have a serious conversation about the future. Why don't you take your tea into the den and relax?"

He nods, kisses my cheek and slides off the stool.

I go up to change, giving us both a little time alone. I put on an old pair of pajamas and curl up in the chair by the window. As I replay some of the conversation with Dr. Matthews my vision blurs and the tears start to fall.

I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I know it is midnight and Charlie is kneeling next to me, gently stroking my hair.

"Nancy, honey. Come to bed," he whispers.

In my half-awake state I nod and climb into bed. Charlie brushes his teeth and crawls in next to me.