Early morning
A/N:- Thank you for the reviews and onto the next chapter. Enjoy.
Everything will be fine? He could hardly believe that himself. This was the worst argument they had ever had. Gently reaching out he stroked his finger down Emi's soft cheek. "Sorry Emi, mummy might have lied to you." Closing his eyes, he tried to get at least a little bit of sleep. He needed to apologize to Kadota and the rest of his workmates for involving his personal life.
Some point during the night, he opened his eyes blinking through the darkness. Emi was still asleep next to him. Good she had seemed to calm down. Shizuo wasn't too sure what had woken him, he had thought he had heard a small click. Shaking his head, he shuffled back under the warmth of the covers and closed his eyes.
It was still dark when his little girl woke up, crying her head off. Forcing his tired eyes open, he reached over in his half awake state, finding the space next to him was empty. "Shh! I've got you." Good, his lover was taking care of her. Seconds later his eyes snapped open in realization, his blood running cold. "Dada." Sitting up, the blond switched the light on, seeing Izaya sitting at the end of the bed.
His lover wasn't even looking at him. "Oh? You said your first word. Say it again." Emi giggled. Remaining where he was, he tried to judge the mood Mr god complex was in. "Give her here." Crimson eyes flicked up to meet his own. "No." What? "You want to stay with daddy don't you? Your meanie mummy tried to take you away."
"Give me back my daughter." His lover stood up from the bed, cradling the happy little girl. "Ne, protozoan. I told you to wait at home. Instead you run away and come here." Throwing back the covers, he tried not to panic as Izaya took a step back. "Come on sweetie, lets go home." Shizuo clenched his fists. "You can't take her away from me."
"I'm not. I'm taking her home, whether you come along or not is your choice." Shaking his head, his eyes widened incredulously. "You'd really use her against me?" In reply the flea headed for the door. "Are you coming or not?" Glaring at the bed, he grit his teeth. "Wait! I'm coming." He wasn't surprised to see that everything had been packed away already, his phone was held in his lover's hand.
Picking the bag up, he followed Izaya out of the hotel room, trying to keep up. He had no choice, he wouldn't let Emi go, he was her mother. But for Izaya to do something like this... There was no going back. When he reached the reception desk, his key card joined the one Izaya had put down. Of course he had found out where they were staying.
Shizuo watched as Emi was strapped into her baby seat. "You're in the passenger seat." He didn't say anything as he climbed into the car and yanked his seat belt across. "Good, lets go home." Leaning against the window, he stared blankly at the dark sky. The roads were nearly empty, letting them pass through with ease. What time was it?
His heart lurched as the car pulled up onto the drive. Izaya was the first out, lifting Emi into his arms. Slamming the door, he trudged inside the open door, closing it behind him. Already the baby gate was unlocked, the flea disappearing up the stairs to put Emi to sleep. Right now he had never hated anyone as much as he did Izaya.
Slumping on the sofa, he covered his face with his hands. Why did things go like this? He wasn't sure how long he spent like that. "Emi is asleep." He didn't answer, a vicious anger was simmering under the surface, covered by a layer of pain. "Did you hear me protozoan?" Again he didn't answer. "Its three o'clock in the morning, we should go to bed."
"I'll sleep on the sofa." His lover laughed coldly. "Fine, sulk. See you in the morning protozoan." The bedroom door slammed shut and he knew Izaya was still pissed, that would be why he was acting like such an ass hole. Laying on the sofa, his feet balanced over the edge. "You idiot." Who he was talking about he wasn't sure.
When he woke up the next morning, the bedroom door was open, a blanket covered him. But he knew it was probably just to check he hadn't run away again. A loud giggle directed his attention to his daughter sitting in the high chair. "You can take the day off protozoan. I'm taking Emi to my mother. She's offered to look after her."
"You can't do that." Crimson eyes glared at him. "At least if she's not with you, I don't have to worry if you'll still be here or not." Shizuo shook his head. "Don't take her. Izaya." His pleading was ignored. "All done. Good girl. Say goodbye to mummy." A tiny hand waved at him. "Don't." The front door slammed shut, leaving him alone. His fist hit the floor.
Pulling himself up, he headed for the bedroom, taking out his pill and dry swallowing. He still hadn't got changed. Taking out a change of clothes he headed for the bathroom. He didn't know where his phone or key were, most likely Izaya had taken them with him. If he left he wouldn't be able to get back in.
His body shook as he ran the bath. Where the hell did they go from here? He couldn't do anything. If he left he would lose Emi, he knew he would. Once the water was near the top, he switched off the taps, ripping his tattered clothes from his frame. The bubble bath made his cuts sting as he sank down into the hot water. Ignoring the pain, he reached out, gently lifting the bright yellow rubber duck that Emi loved, placing it in the palm of his hand.
He spent the rest of the day curled up in bed, with nothing to do. He didn't move from that spot missing both breakfast and lunch, he didn't have an appetite, his chest hurt. Not even Izaya's knife hurt this much. He wanted his little girl back. His eyes were damp as he closed them.
"Protozoan, wake up. Dinners done." Opening his eyes, he could see Izaya standing in the doorway. Emi was in his arms, sitting up, he reached out for her. "Eat your food. I'll take care of her." Shizuo felt the brief glimmer of hope die as the flea took his daughter away. Falling back down onto the bed, he rolled over, trying to get back to sleep. Fighting with Izaya now would only make things worse.
Shizuo woke up again when Izaya climbed into the bed. Sitting up he went to get off of the bed. "Where are you going?" A slim arm hooked around his waist pulling him back. "To check on Emi." His lover shook his head. "She's sleeping. Stay here. You are not sleeping on the sofa again." Shrugging off the hold, he climbed back into bed. "Fine." He smacked Izaya's hand away as his lover reached for him. "Don't touch me!"
When he woke up the next morning, he was alone in bed, shooting out of bed, he ran out of the bedroom, seeing that the room was empty. "Damn it!" Once again Izaya had taken Emi. Once again he was alone. Clutching at his chest he felt his heart twist into chaos. Before hand he would then switch to Shizuka or be comforted by his lover. This time he was completely on his own.
Opening the baby gate he trudged up the stairs, feeling as if he barely had any energy. Grabbing onto the door frame, he pulled himself into Emi's room. His steps were steady as he walked to her cot, reaching down to pick up the soft toy rabbit. If this continued when would he get to hold his little girl again?
Shizuo was staring blankly at the wall, when he heard the door open. He didn't bother to move, hugging onto the bunny. "Shizu-chan? Shizu-chan?" There were footsteps on the stairs,not just one set. "Shizu-chan, what are you doing in here?" He didn't answer. Long fingers rested on his chin, lifting his head up and forcing him to meet crimson eyes. "Don't ignore me."
His mouth opened the words tumbling out. "...Did you get me pregnant on purpose to make me suffer?" The flea looked like he had slapped him. "Izaya is everything okay?" He could hear a woman's voice. "Shizuo. What's wrong?" He didn't say anything. "Izaya I warned you he wasn't ready." He blinked as he heard a small noise. "Out now!"
"Shizuo." The bunny was tugged out of his hands. "I apologise for my son, he's an idiot." Something heavier was lowered into his arms. "Aba Aba." Blinking repeatedly, he glanced down seeing innocent crimson eyes look up to him. "...Emi." His fingers shook as he stroked her cheek. "If you want to knock my son into next week, I won't blame you. I've already given him a slap."
"Thank you." He felt his eyes become damp. "Come on, this has gone on long enough." With Kyouko's help he stood up, cradling Emi to his chest. Slowly he made his way down the stairs. "Sit down both of you." Shizuo sat down away from Izaya, holding his little girl protectively, his stomach grumbled loudly. "Shizuo have you eaten?"
Letting out a sigh, he smiled as Emi grabbed onto his finger. "No." Kyouko slapped Izaya around the back of the head. "I'll make you a sandwich. Play nice." He watched as she went into the kitchen leaving him and Izaya alone. "Shizu-chan. I'm sorry." The blond didn't reply. He backed away as the flea tried to move closer.
"We said some hurtful things to each other, didn't we?" He didn't answer. "Aba Aba." Standing up, he went to find Kyouko. "Has she been fed yet?" Izaya's mother shook her head. "No, its just coming up to lunch time." Opening the fridge, he took out a yoghurt, tiny hands trying to reach for it. Both of them returned to their seats, Kyouko leaving his sandwich on the table. "Shizu-chan you should eat. I can feed Emi."
His fingers froze as he went to peel back the lid. "No." He didn't want to let her go again, he was even reluctant to place her in the high chair. The only reason they were talking normally was because Kyouko was in the room. "Now what was this argument about? What did you do Izaya?" Behind him he could hear the flea scoff. "Why do you think it's my fault? The protozoan tried to leave me."
"Apologize. If you two don't sort this out, it will continue. The last argument me and Shirou had lasted a month. We almost got a divorce" His lover sighed. "I already said I was sorry." It wasn't enough. "For? I thought I taught you how to respect other people." A smiled tugged at the corner of his lips, hearing Mr god complex get scolded. "Fine. Shizu-chan I'm sorry for not listening to you. Ow! Mum stop it."
Looking behind him he could see Izaya's ear being pinched harshly. "And for ripping up your resignation. I'm sorry for using my knife to cut you and saying things I didn't mean. Shizu-chan, I'm sorry for taking Emi away from you." Turning away, he began feeding his hungry baby. "Good. Shizuo do you accept his apology?"
"...Yeah. Sorry for the things I said and hitting you." Letting out a sigh, he continued feeding Emi. "Good. Now that you two have made up, Shizuo if you ever do need any help with babysitting, you can trust me." Shizuo nodded, forcing a smile. "I know. Thank you Kyouko."
Once he had fed his little girl, he took off the bib, unstrapping her from the high chair. This time an apology wasn't going to work. There was no going back, no matter how much the flea apologized. Anyway who knew if Izaya really meant it, his mother was the one who had forced it out of his mouth.
Sitting back down, he placed Emi in his lap, while he grabbed his sandwich. "Are you two going to be okay now?" Shizuo couldn't answer, chewing his mouthful. "Yes, we'll be fine. You can stop interfering now." He couldn't tell how Izaya was feeling. Kyouko stood up once he had finished eating, giving him a hug. "If my son does anything else you can come and see me." Behind her, Shizuo could see Izaya shaking his head. "Bye bye, Emi."
His little girl giggled. "I'll see you out." Following the kind woman to the door, he kept a smile on his face. "You know that he loves you, Shizuo." Nodding his head slightly, he opened the door allowing Kyouko outside. Waving her goodbye, the blond closed the door. "Shizu-chan, we need to talk." It was too late for that.
Even so, he sat down anyway away from Izaya. The flea narrowed his eyes, but didn't say anything. "Your resignation. You really want to work at Artic?" The blond nodded. "Its better for Emi, I'll be here looking after her during the day and then you can look at her at night." There was silence in the room, he could see Izaya running a hand through his hair.
"You don't need to work. I earn more than enough. We'd have less time together." Shizuo shrugged. "I don't see it as a problem. I want to work, this is the best way." The flea seemed a lot calmer this time, maybe that slap had knocked some sense into him. "...Fine. But if it doesn't work, then you come back to work for me. The year is almost over, you can leave after that." The blond shrugged his shoulders. "Fine. Shouldn't you get back to work?"
"What you don't want to spent the rest of the day with me?" Shizuo met that crimson gaze full of suggestions. "No." He watched as the flea's grin dropped. "What?" Smiling down at his little girl, he ignored the question. "Should we get you changed?" Emi smiled up at him. "Go to work, Izaya." Carrying his baby up the stairs he didn't listen to whether the raven left or not.
After he had changed his daughter, he found out that the flea was still sitting there. "You haven't left yet?" He could see that Izaya was watching him, no doubt trying to read him. "I can't leave without my goodbye kiss, besides you need your ring back." Shizuo didn't move or say anything. "Shizu-chan say something." Emi was trying to get off of his lap, scrambling up to his shoulder. "I think we should break up."
Crimson eyes blinked in shock. "What? Why? I said I was sorry, Shizu-chan." Untangling tiny hands from his hair, he faced his lover. "I know. I just can't. I don't want to love you any more." Even as he said it, his chest ached. "You want to leave?" Looking down at Emi, he shook his head. "No. It wouldn't be fair on Emi. I'll still live here, so she can be with both of us."
"You can-" Mr god complex trailed off, opening his mouth and closing it again. "I love you." Closing his eyes, Shizuo took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. "Shizu-chan." He could hear footsteps coming towards him. "Look at me." A hand rested on his knee. "Please." Opening his eyes, his eyes widened seeing Izaya crouched down in front of him. "Dada."
"Not now, sweetie. Mummy and daddy need to talk." The blond shook his head, arms protectively around Emi. Long fingers cupped his cheek. "Don't give up on me. On us." His breath hitched, unable to move. "We've already been through so much, Shizu-chan." Damn it. "I c-" He couldn't say it. "It hurts."
His lover sighed. "I know. But we'll get over it. Don't run away again." He couldn't look away as Izaya moved closer, closing the distance between them. His lover's thumb brushed against his bottom lip. "Izaya." He couldn't hate him. The flea was the only one he had ever and would ever love. "Shh! Let me make everything better."
Why was he so weak when it came to Izaya? "I should hate you." Those fingers curled in his hair, gently pulling his head forward, until their lips were barely touching. "You can't walk away, Shizu-chan and neither can I." He brushed his lips against Izaya's, before backing away. "Tell me you don't love me."
Shizuo sighed, a small giggle in his ear. "You know I can't. Damn it." The flea kissed him again. Tilting his head slightly, he let Izaya kiss him again, this time for longer, his eyes slipping shut. They were both idiots, but Izaya was right, neither of them could walk away for Emi's sake and for their own.
Moving his lips against his lover's, his free hand looped around his neck, pulling him closer. Once again Izaya had managed to completely disarm him and mess up his mind. His eyes snapped open as a small foot pressed into his stomach, a tiny hand slapping at his face. His lover laughed as he pulled away.
"Looks like we'll have to continue another time." His face flushed at the suggestive wink. "This doesn't fix everything." Turning around, he grabbed Emi who was currently trying to crawl behind him. "Yeah. I know. But we can rebuild it. Again and again, no matter how many times it takes." Shizuo caught hold of Emi, a smile on his face. "Yeah. Emi stay still. Why are you so hyper?"
"I think the twins might have given her sugar. Do you want to take tomorrow off?" His little girl giggled trying to escape again. "No. It's ok. I'll let Kyouko look after her. A little help here?" His lover stepped forward lifting her from his lap. He winced as Emi yanked his hair, her hands gripping his face. "Dada."
"What are you up to?" His little girl giggled pursing her lips and pressing them to the edge of his mouth. "Dada." He smiled when she let go, Izaya holding her in his arms. "No sweetie, only I'm allowed to do that. But I'll let you off since I owe you." In response Emi giggled kissing the flea on the forehead. He should've known not to to anything like that in front of his daughter, of course she would copy anything she saw.
Mr god complex was grinning. "You love daddy that much? You can't kiss anyone else. Okay?" Shizuo sighed. "She's a baby, she's not going to understand it." The flea lowered their little girl to the floor, where she pulled herself up on his knee. "Aka aka." Both he and the flea laughed as she made a kissing noise. "You want a kiss?"
Scooping up the giggling girl, he lifted her up high, smothering her tummy in kisses. "Aka Aka." Shizuo could see Izaya watching them, those crimson eyes were soft and full of love for the both of them. If it hadn't been for Emi, he knew his stubbornness would have kept them apart, walking away without looking back. No matter how much it hurt. He blinked when he heard the click. "You're taking pictures again?" His lover grinned. "Of course, these are going in the album. Speaking of making memories, we need to go shopping." Shizuo smiled. "Just don't go overboard. She has enough toys as it is." Ah that was right, it was very near to the end of the year.
Next:- Christmas time