((I AM SO SORRY FOR THE DELAY! I finally finished all of my final portfolios, essays, and final exams, and I'm currently finishing my last week of work for the school year, so that mean that we are back! To write fics! Again I am so sorry for the delay and thank all of you for your warm comments ))
It was getting painful…waiting….day after day, night after night, and it's getting to the point where Izumo doesn't know how much longer Yata can go before his body wastes away to nothing but bones.
"Why don't you take a nap on the couch Yata? You look like hell."
"No," is the vanguard's response everytime the question is asked, wanting nothing more than to return to Saruhiko's bedside and wait. Always waiting.
His heart drops when he rushes to the hospital and sees that nothing has changed, looking at Saru whose eyes are still closed, tubed keeping his body going. Tubes doing more for the blue than he ever could. He takes the other's hand in his like he always does as he sits down, the only thing it seems like he can do.
Why am I so useless? Why?! Why couldn't I….why didn't I…..why? Why?! Why wasn't I there?!
He knows deep down that there could have been no way for him to have been there, no reason for it. Not with the way things were anyway. They hated eachother….right? They were supposed to anyway. How could he have possibly known? How could he have been by his side when every time they were within ten feet of one another, they always fought?
He's tired of fighting, tired of the way things are, tired of crying, and tired of feeling weak from lack of sleep and food. He'd tired. So tired he can't keep his head up. He doesn't mean to close his eyes but he can stop himself, head resting on the side of the bed.
When his eyes open again he's in a bed, confused by the soft covers surrounding him and the cool washcloth on his forehead.
"Huh? Hey what's-?"
"Don't you even think about getting out of bed Misaki. I'll tie you in if you try."
His head snaps to the side at that voice, Saruhiko in the doorway in that all too familiar blue uniform. "Saru? Saru! Saru I-" He's cut off again.
"Stop being so noisy. You passed out stupid. You have a fever so don't you even think about trying to get up and do anything ok? I'll take care of it."
"Saru….Saruhiko I…" He starts crying, unable to stop the tears that flow down his cheeks, wetting the comforter. "Saru….Saru, Saru, Saru." It's all he can say.
He can barely see the blue's eyes widen at the sudden water works through his tears but Saru's fast to rush over and comfort, hands cupping his face.
"Shhh, shh…hey what's wrong?! Are you hurt? Are you feeling sick? Dizzy? Hot? Did someone hurt you?"
The barrage of questions is something he doesn't expect and he simply pulls Saru into a hug so tight that he actually worries about whether he's hurting the other or not.
"I'm sorry! I'm so sorry! I'm sorry I wasn't there, sorry I couldn't help you, sorry you left, sorry, sorry sorry, I'm sorry!" He's sobbing and he can't contain himself, feelings spilling out of him as Saruhiko's hands grip the back of his shirt to keep him just as close. The hands release him and pat softly. "There there, it'll all be fine. Just relax a little ok?"
The voice is now Izumo's and when Yata pulls back it's the blonde's face smiling back at him, cigarette dangling from his lips, making him jump."I keep telling you not to worry so much. The doctors are taking care of him. Why don't you sleep. Come on, no more worrying."
"Yeah Yata-chan. Don't sweat it…it'll all work out." The face changes again and his heart twists to see Totsuka by his bedside, wearing that forever sunny smile.
"T-Totsuka-san…Totsu-"
"Don't sweat…the small stuff….r-right Yata-chan?"
The redhead watches in horror as blood drips down the blonde's face, down the face that still smiles kindly at him.
"Right Yata-chan? Rig-"
"Ahh!" He jerks away with a start and for a moment he doesn't know where he is, feeling disoriented. Everything comes rushing back and he looks at Saru, still unconscious on the bed, still breathing gently, still asleep. This time though, when he slips his hand inside the other's, he feels like Saru is the one comforting him.
The nurse looks at him from where she's changing the IV fluid and looks a little concerned. "Are you alright? Your scream gave me quite the scare. Do you need me to get you anything?" He shakes his head, knowing that it's the stress and lack of food and sleep getting to him. He doesn't get to answer though, the whir of a machine making them both turn with wide eyes, shock on both their faces.
"His brain…it's awake." The nurse is smiling as she rushes out to get a doctor, leaving Yata to continue staring in shock.
His brain is….awake? That means….he's ok….right? Please….please….
When the nurse is back she takes Saruhiko's pulse, taking his free hand of course. The medical staff had learned early on that once Yata positioned himself beside Saru's bed after he was done with work in the morning, there was no moving him. Taking the other side was simply automatic for them now.
When he feels Saru's hand slowly, weakly close around his own though, tears spring to his eyes as he quickly looks down at the hand then back at Saru's face.
"S-Saru? Saru can you hear me?" He reaches forward and wipes the tears away with his free hand. "Saru please."
"We'll get him to come to." The nurse assures. "Just a few minutes. That's all we need."
He's already waited a few minutes, hours, days, weeks. He's tired of waiting, needs something to keep him going before he gives up and lets himself disappear completely. He needs something to reassure him, his optimism long gone after weeks of no change and a 50/50 outlook.
He watches the other's eyes slowly open and he's never been happier to see the color blue in his life. His hand moves quickly again to wipe gently at fresh tears, soothing, doing his best not to startle him.
"Shh…Saru don't cry. It's ok, it's ok, you're ok, I'm here." Yata's smiling like an idiot, his own tears streaming down his face.
"Mi…saki…?"
A choked sob leaves Yata's chest at how relieved he is to hear that name from the blue's lips and he vows to never complain about it again.
"Am I…still a part…of the world?"
It's so good to hear Saru's voice again that he can barely get out a reply because he's crying so hard, relief making his emotion uncontrollable.
"S-Stupid…..c-course you are." He hiccups. "Y-You here with me and I won't leave you….ok?"
The blue's eyes fall shut again and stay closed, making him panic.
"Why is he sleeping again?! Why?! What happened?! He was talking five seconds ago and-"
The nurse calmly pushes him back into his chair and the doctor assures that this is normal, and while he'll probably sleep through the rest of the night, he'll wake up again soon. He explains that over time, he'll be able to sustain consciousness longer, and to just give it time.
He's too tired to ask questions, so he simply nods and calls Izumo, keeping him informed like he had asked. He's sure that information will be passed on to that damned Munakata but he's too tired to care about even that.
He'll wait, he'll wait just like he has been for the past three weeks. He'll wait as long as it takes for Saruhiko to come back to him. There's a fire in his heart again, a fire called hope.