A/N Hey guys, back with another chapter! I think I'll be able to do one chapter every weekday, probably... in any case, thanks for all those who read the story up until this point(even if you didn't like it completely). After reading the insightful reviews, I guess I'll refrain from making 'perv' jokes. As much at least, I just think from time to time I would lighten the mood with a joke. Idk... do you guys enjoy or hate the little self-inputs from me? I do try to keep in character, aside from the deviations, I try to come up with something Kirito and Asuna would or might say in any given case. If you like this story so far, thanks for giving it a chance. If not, don't worry, after I finish this story and the sequels, I'll be writing another take on SAO. It will be an alternate, much darker, and kind of a crossover borrowing elements from other anime series. But all things come in good time. Anyways, happy reading!
It's cold tonight and the clouds turn grey.
The sixth floor. A rocky and barren terrain. The last floor was cleared in about six, I guess five in-a-half days.
I was now level 25 and sulking. Yeah, if this wasn't a death game, I guess you could say, 'first world problems'.
It was dark all around, and the sky was an unsettling blue. I suppose there's an exact shade of blue that I don't know the name for, so I'll have to consult Asuna next time... girls are very knowledgeable in that area...
Recently, guilds started popping up everywhere. Ranging from small, which was about 4 people, to large, maybe 30?...
Yes, from a practical point of view, there were many advantages. From my point of view, and a very biased one I'll admit, there were also drawbacks. I just picked on those reasons to justify soloing everything. I guess I'll start with the benefits so I can bash on the flaws last...
In a guild, your chances of survival increased... supposedly, and I'll explain why so later... but anyhow, you could share space for common items in battle such as potions and weapons and such. You could also track a member, privately message them, and if you were high enough in rank, get to boss them around.
I guess the last part sounds fun, but I would just command my guild mates to leave me alone...
Now we can talk about why I'm against joining a guild.
First of all, there's tax, which meant all spoils and gains of any income had to have a percentage donated to the vault. Second of all, there were other people there, which meant they expected something of me, and that meant I had to talk to them, or more accurately, 'put up' with them.
Honestly, me being in a guild would be a negative for everyone, including me especially. You have to share things, you have to actually care, and you can't just do whatever you want, which is what I had been doing, and it worked out fine. Sure I was still hated, but I meant to do that... It just wasn't my style and I was never one for teamwork... if I won, it was because of me, and no one else... still...
Recently, or however long it's been, my opinion started to waver and I blamed this on continued association with other people.
Earlier I said joining a guild 'supposedly' increases your chances of survival... well we saw how well my first attempt at teamwork went...
In the end, it's all about trust. And trust was a very fragile, thin line. So precious and morally righteous that it was hard to find sometimes. It could keep you alive, or kill you for having it. I never wanted to trust anyone, at least not that closely... but because of a certain girl, I was torn between two conflicting sides in my mind.
Is it better to be alone, simple as possible, or together, knowing that brings risk but a chance for something better?...
I'm no Socrates so I didn't get very intimate with it. I just stuck with soloing so far, and that has produced more successes for me. If it ain't broke, don't fix it, right?
Still... you lack things being alone... but that's only because I had a taste of what it was like to be with other people...
Friends...
It sounded nice, but how long do they stay around?...
I kept my arms crossed, standing on the flat roof the house I was renting. The moon seemed to be sad. I felt like something at least could relate to me. Nature's pretty good at that...
Knights of the Blood Oath.
That was the guild I was apart of. We all had to get uniforms of red and white. There was a customized emblem of a red sword on our clothes and shields. It looked pure and eye-catching.
I was going to miss the freedom of being a solo player. But I knew this was for the best. Kirito-kun wouldn't hate me for this, he said he trusted me with the right decisions. Well, this wasn't a wrong decision, so I thought this would work out.
We formed recently after Heathcliff held a meeting with various people he had handpicked out. We were to the Elite Circle. He said he picked information from various sources and had personally seen the potential of our abilities. We agreed to join him since it was the best course of action. I was a little hesitant to put on the uniform, but cast aside my past profile. This was for the best.
There were other guilds as well, such the Divine Dragon Alliance, or DDA. They had more numbers than us, but it obvious which group had the better members. They currently, were only competition against us. There were smaller guilds as well, but none of real significance so I won't bother you with naming names.
I wondered if Kirito-kun would ever join a guild. The immediate thought was no, but I felt as though there was hope for him. Maybe he could even join my guild.
I know that's a lot to hope for, but a girl can dream, right? Kirito had proven to be more than proficient when working together with a partner. I know he was hated by most people, but maybe he could change their opinions but showing a new side to him alongside a guild. I think he would look good in white, that knight in shining armor-
I mean, just, you know the guy at the front with insane sword finesse and yeah... ugh... what am I to do...
I wondered what he was doing. Honestly I wasn't paying attention to this meeting. It sounded like the same words being repeated over and over. Basically, 'get this stuff', 'we need to start doing this', 'if we start from the bottom we can get to here', and so on...
I felt awkward being the only female member. It just made me stand out more. To make matters worse, some other members tried to get close to me. I rejected them one by one, but since we were in the same guild, they didn't seem too disappointed and kept trying.
Too bad Kirito-kun isn't here... he could take of this for me... I thought desperately. It would be a while before I got used to being in a guild, much less like it.
Hmm... I need a new sword... I thought a little anxiously. I had grown attached to «Wind Fleuret» over time, but it was starting to lessen in efficiency. I guess I should start looking for a smith... I didn't welcome the prospect of dirtying my clothes with ash and soot to level up smithing and I wasn't going to start...
The sixth floor was cleared in, hey, what do you know, six days... very convenient. I don't even have to try and narrate...
So far the Rare drops given out since the fourth floor(in order) were «Dragore Blade», a sharp-looking, orange-colored sword with tooth-like serrations near the hilt. Fittingly, this drop was won by the leader of the now Divine Dragon Alliance, which is where they got their name. Well, I don't know about 'Divine', that sounded really douchey and godly arrogant but I wasn't one to speak... and I wondered why they didn't theme their armor and equipment orange. It was grey and with dark blue accents instead. Well, I'm not trying to judge fashion or anything so I'll leave it at that.
The 5th floor drop was «Ivory Talons» which were a pair of claws won by, surprisingly, Argo. Guess even she had some combat experience. Well, claws weren't my cup of tea anyway...
The 6th Rare drop was the one I recently acquired, called the «Cloak of Midnight». Obviously, it must be related to the Coat, so I assumed there were a set of these items. I wasn't really into the collector's business, but I liked how the two matched. A good pair. Curtains to the window if you will, or a girl's dress to her shoes... or handbag... whatever they compare...
This particular item allowed me invisibility as long as it wore it. This sounds utterly unfair so the game balanced it out. The more you move, the Cloak would 'shimmer' and it looked as though a shadow or some kind of smoke was moving. So the best this cloak was for was recon and eavesdropping. But you would have to stick the shadows or plan in advance. Still, any kind of invisibility was pretty badass and I felt great under it. But I was not going to abuse it, and you know what I mean... I have some decency. And I wasn't going to use it to sneak into restricted sections of the library or anything... *wink*
The description for this item was: Complete invisibility when worn, moving will decrease effects relative to speed of movement. Best used at night.
And that wasn't obvious... not to mention the way they put it sounded very ambiguous, but that's just me...
I walked around town with no real interest in doing anything. It was daytime so I didn't bother to pull out the cloak. People were bustling about and avoiding my gaze. Well, at least I'm ignored. I'd rather not have a fight.
I sat down on a bench to contemplate my next course of action. The sky was light grey and there was light passing through the openings in the clouds.
I surveyed the area with my «Searching» skill in use. I was looking for something to do. Then I saw a group or armored men. They were walking in formation and the heavy metal they wore clunked around so it was kind of hard to miss them. One of them kept looking back as though he suspected someone trailing them. Very conspicuous. As I had nothing better to do, I decided to follow them with the cloak. Luckily the premises around us provided shadows for me to walk so I was unable to be detected by sight.
They turned a corner and I snuck around, glancing at them. I saw a nervous boy among them. I wondered what that was all about.
I saw them throw him to the floor and they surrounded him. Peculiar. I saw them address the boy, who looked to be 18.
"Now we'll ask you one more time, how about joining the Aincrad Liberation Corps?" Said an imposing figure. He was the only one wearing a red arm sash so I assumed he was the leader. The boy responded trembling.
"But- but- why?" He stuttered out fearfully. I couldn't blame him. It looked like a mugging scene.
"Because we need more members to fill the Frontlines, and we can't let the DDA or the KoB get ahead," said the leader. "Our goal is to ensure equality among all players," he added. That's a very odd thing to say when you're using force on someone... I guess ignorance never fails to amaze me.
"Oh- oh- okay, please just stop asking," said the boy frightened and resigned. I felt bad for the kid, but I didn't step in. Yeah, yeah, I know. Stop bullying, we've all heard it at school at some point. But I was already hated enough, I didn't more of an inconvenience...
Sorry, kid... I thought bitterly. You're gonna have to tough this one out... I've already done my share...
And that cemented the reason why I didn't want to join a guild. I hated watching that scene, not just because of the cruelty, but because it showed a victory in quantity, not quality. I always believed that being the single best player was better than a team of good players. That right there went against my beliefs, and tried not to remember it.
I saw Klein's guild «Fuurinkazan» in town. I didn't approach him to talk. It looked like he was talking amiably with his friends, I didn't want to interrupt. Besides, why would he want to see me... I ditched him. What kind of friend does that...
It seemed the recent sequence of events did nothing but give me more reason to not join a guild. My expectations were low, and they just kept getting lower. I just hoped that Asuna didn't... well, even if she did, it's not my decision. I don't why I felt so bitter.
I had been present at every battle meeting so far, and every fight to clear the next floor. What I noticed that those guilds actually paid off. They worked together well, and soon it was just me and few stragglers who worked alone. We got a few hits in, but since the guilds now dominated the front, it was harder to get the last hit.
Hmph. Even so, I doubted they would ever measure up to me. Another benefit to being solo, was that you didn't have to share experience.
The seventh floor was to be cleared today. After the meeting everyone went straight to dungeons. After clearing the preliminary enemies guarding the pathway, we approached the ever-ominous doors. The walls were lit by torches and the light stretched to the floor encompassing all who stood within the radius. I decided to use my «Cloak of Midnight» to get today's Rare drop. You know that motto the Three Musketeers always say? Well, I only believed in the 'All for One' part.
The doors were pushed open by Heathcliff. He had been showing up consistently to the battles.
The boss was a giant rabbit. I'm not kidding.
It looked pretty demented though, with sharp teeth and red eyes. It's fur was snow-white and had claws. Huh. Not very cute...
The Frontliners took the lead and charged in. The DDA acted as tanks and the Knights of the Blood used advanced tactics to swarm and disorient the boss. They dealt hits in turn as to confuse the boss from all directions.
I tried to get in on the action but it seemed other players got in my way, or they were intentionally shutting me out. I guess I wasn't too bothered though, just frustrated. I was going to use the Cloak anyway, that does seem like killstealing and I'll admit it's cheap, but you never complain when you get it, do you? Besides, they were excluding me from fighting as much. Experience was given based on participation and performance. SAO followed the universal rule, 'No pain, no gain'... except if you find money on the floor. Or have inheritance. I suppose you could also jack someone at knifepoint but that's illegal... anyways...
The boss neared the end of its health and had half a bar left. Suddenly it jumped, quite high, and ground-pounded the floor with its foot. A skill called «Wave Diffusion» and it knocked almost everyone off balance. Everyone except me. I took my chance and with «Meteor Smash» a heavy impact downward strike, I took the kill.
The boss was streaked with a vibrant red light and broke into many shards of blue glass. To almost everyone, it looked like the boss had spontaneously exploded. To those with high enough «Detection» though, could see there was a hidden player.
The cloak almost flew off but stayed on just barely. I guess that's why there was a rabbit on the seventh floor. And why its foot was so potent. Cause you know, 7's a lucky number, rabbit's foot... yeah never mind. Back to reality, everyone just seemed content that it was over and one less floor to go. Albeit a bit confused but no matter. I guess they could consider themselves lucky that I stepped in. Another ground-pound like that might have been fatal.
I checked the Rare drop I got.
«Amulet of Athena». Interesting name. I checked the description.
This item when worn will increase the stat of whatever Skill is being used at time by 50%. Note: Any experience gained will be decreased by 50%. Extra note: Good for aesthetic purposes.
I snorted. So the game had a little sense of humor. This item seemed to be pretty good, but I'd rather legitimately gain my experience. I suppose I would sell it for, I don't know, I'd have to check sales...
I walked to the doors and opened it silently to the stairways. I climbed the winding pathway and made to the top. Dizzying. I then opened the doors to the eighth floor.
It looked very different from the last floor, which was kind of on the green side, with random vegetation growing about and trees in the weirdest places... once I woke up with a branch in my face...
This area was more, eh, homey?... I don't know how else to say it. There were wheat fields and farms stretching into the distance. I walked the pathway to the «Teleport Gate» and touched the cool stone. It glowed blue signaling activation. The streets were compiled of cobblestones and lights adorned the town inside street lanterns. It looked peaceful, almost too good to be true. And it was because I didn't plan to stay here long. Just another being the Alpha...
I was going to search for a place to rent out, but then a voice stopped me.
"Kirito-kun..." said Asuna. I was not surprised to hear her voice, I was surprised she found me. I turned around and threw off the cloak.
I noticed the doors open ever so slightly. But no one was there, or at least it seemed so, but I saw a shadow with the outline of a person. I had a hunch, and decided to follow this 'shadow' up the stairs to the next floor.
On my map, since I had high enough «Detection», I could track the 'shadow' on my map. It stopped at the town. I checked for the name. «Friben Village». It looked nice enough.
I hadn't talked to Kirito in a while and while being in a guild had its benefits, it was really hard not to quit. But I steeled myself to put up with it. Kirito looked like he was about to leave, so I called out to him.
"Kirito-kun..." I said quietly and he must have caught this for he stopped on my radar. He threw off the cloak and there was a sight I haven't seen in a while. Still in black, suspicious and mysterious as always...
He looked surprised but then smiled slightly.
"I swear to God you are stalking me," he teased automatically. Gosh, now I regret coming here... first thing he says pisses me off...
And yet... he was the only person I would let make fun of me.
"You've haven't matured at all... I'm surprised you're not more hated," I quipped back. He rolled his eyes but smiled anyway.
"Why? Do you hate me now?" He joked. I'm already reaching my limit...
"I don't know, figure it out..." I said coldly. I came here to have a civilized conversation and he responds in the most irritable way possible.
"Aww... you know they say the girl just acts really mean to the guy she likes..." he suggested pointedly. I blushed and punched him on his right shoulder. I heard him groan, "Point proven... was worth it..." Guys just didn't know when to stop... you would think he would stop setting himself up for this...
"Have you been keeping out of trouble?" I asked trying to feign disinterest on his safety.
"What do you consider 'trouble'?" Kirito asked very childishly. I rolled my eyes and started walking away in annoyance. He rushed to walk beside me on the right.
"*sigh* Fine... I'll answer seriously. Yes, I've been keeping quiet and out of trouble," he said disappointed that I wasn't in the mood for more verbal warfare of constant bickering and teasing. "You're no fun, Asuna..." He muttered. I smiled at him pouting.
"Hmm... I see. Well as long as you're not dead, that's fine," I said casually. He looked a little stunned at my lack of concern. Then he just threw it away as though it didn't bother him.
"What's with the getup?" He asked suddenly. Oh right. The uniform. I was wondering when he would ask...
"I uh, joined a guild..." I said shyly. He kept looking straight ahead. I looked over slightly to see his expression. He had a very good poker face, I'll admit, but I saw in his eyes the disappointment. Plus he was blinking a little too much. Were his eyes wet?... Or was it a trick of light?... He couldn't be... could he?...
"I see... so you made the smart choice. I hope it's working out," he said cheerfully. But I could see he was faking it behind his smile. It looked painful...
"It has its benefits. But I get approached by a few of the other members from time to time... it's annoying..." I said truthfully. I think by now I could confide a bit of my trust in him. He gave an odd look. Was that jealousy?...
"Really? I guess I can't blame them..." he said indifferently. I was surprised at his response.
"Why not?" I asked back. He tried to sound like he didn't have an opinion.
"I don't know, I suppose it's because you're pretty..." he said smirking a little bit. I got flushed and wondered where that came from.
"Oh? Is that it?" I teased. I wanted him to keep going. When he started being sincere, I could forgive him for being a jerk.
"Yeah, that's pretty much all you got," he threw at me as a joke. I threw him into the lamppost. I take back what I just said...
"You're never going to change are you?" I asked tiredly with a sigh. He looked calm at this remark.
"I already have changed... enough..." he said distantly and I wondered what he meant. There was a dark and serious look in his eyes. Very gloomy. I pushed him lightly to shake him out of it.
"Quit it, you're ruining the moment," I said mockingly. He smiled just a bit.
"I wonder about that..." he said playing along. I decided to stop playing around.
"What did you mean by 'smart' choice?" I asked curiously. He kept looking forward. Very rude not to give eye contact...
"You know, accepting your limits and deciding to join a guild," he said simply.
"And you haven't reached your limit?" I accused skeptically. He smirked arrogantly. I swear that's his signature move, annoying people to no end... or at least just me...
"I don't have a limit..." he joked. I rolled my eyes. What a guy response.
"You're going to eat those words, and when you do, I won't help you," I said coldly and he gave a false look of incredulity.
"Even if I ask you really nicely?" He said in a playful tone. I sighed exasperated. Typical Kirito.
"Yeah, even if. But don't you ever think of joining a guild?" I asked hiding the hopefulness behind my words. He shook his head and stopped smiling. Besides being known as a beater, what did he have against guilds?
"Oh I thought about it, I just won't join one. No matter how much you persist," he added and that pretty much killed any chance I got at asking him to join.
"Can you tell me why?..." I asked cautiously. I didn't want to tread into space you should stay out of. He responded with an interesting question.
"Let me ask you, Asuna. Do you trust your guild?" he asked and I was caught off guard. I never really gave much thought to that. I guess I joined because the cause was noble, but I never wondered about verifying trust.
"I guess so... why?" I asked a little defensively. Great. Now I started doubting my own guild. Why would he ask that?...
"Because trust is precious... I should know. I'm not doubting your judgement, I'm just saying be careful who you trust..." he said trying to be passive. I was kind of touched by his concern.
"I trust you..." I said quietly. I think he blushed a bit and rolled his eyes in an attempt to pass it off.
"That's beside the point, of course you trust me, I'm just amazing like that," he said pompously. I smirked amused at his way of expressing gratitude. Boys get so flustered so easily...
"Mhm hmm... can I ask why you're so concerned about why I joined a guild?" I asked provocatively. He seemed frustrated trying to come up with a reasonable excuse without being explicit. It was cute.
"Cause I..." It looked like he was really struggling to say it. "I kind of care about you..." he said and he determinedly looked the other way. Aww... he really said it...
I can't say I wasn't affected by his words so I returned the favor.
"And I also kind of care about you..." I admitted heating up slowly. He looked at the ground as though it was the most interesting thing ever. I saw the embarrassment on his cheeks in the lantern light. He coughed to break the ice.
"Anyhow, just... promise me you'll be careful," he said trying to seem unconcerned. It was nice to know he cared.
"That's the advice I should be giving to you," I said but nodded smiling. He acknowledged my acceptance and fell quiet. Then he spoke again.
"You've changed, you know that?" he said unexpectedly. I blinked.
"In what way?" I asked curious to know.
"It seems as though you've found something worthwhile in this world," he said plainly. That was an accurate deduction, I'll admit. He's pretty sharp, just not all the time...
"Yeah, I suppose... what about you?" I asked wonderingly. He looked saddened.
"I had something worthwhile... but I threw it away and lost it... I'm trying to get it back," he said solemnly. I don't know what was going through his mind but I think I could sympathize and empathize with him. He must've been referring to the real world. It was an unspoken rule to not ask about personal things such as that. I did want to ask... but I held back my questions.
"I hope you find what you lost," I said expressing my condolences. He nodded in acceptance.
"Thanks... at the very least, I think I found something here," he said sincerely and looked at me directly. I turned away blushing. I suddenly sneezed. I forgot that it was cold.
Kirito looked very conflicted for some reason. Then after sighing nervously, he put his arm around my shoulders. I have blushed way too many times in this game... and every time it was because of him.
"Uhh... well... joined body temperatures share more warmth, so... don't kill me..." he said with his eyes closed silently praying I wouldn't hit him. I smiled warmly. Because it was, and only because it was him, I let it go. We walked that way for a while, and at one point I got tired and leaned my head against his shoulder.
We reached the north end of the village. We sat down on a bench just enjoying each other's presence. I was growing sleepy. Kirito pondered silently, and then he looked up.
"I think the other players are coming now. It's time to split up," he said suddenly. I didn't hear or see anyone, though.
"How can you tell?" I asked drowsily.
"«Hypersense». It's an «Outside System Skill»," he said simply. Of course.
"Huh, fancy..." I said. I honestly didn't want him to go, but I guess he had to in order to avoid further complications.
"We won't really be able to work together much anymore, but good luck with the guild," he said standing up.
"Yeah... I would say the same, but you don't need luck, do you?" I said smirking. I expected he was going to say something arrogant.
"I've already had the best luck, I got to meet you, didn't I?" He said sincerely. My eyes opened wider. Did he just say... I blushed and wondered why the bench didn't melt.
"Why are you saying all these things?..." I asked still very embarrassed but touched. I like this side of him...
"Because things are going to change," he said briefly. "I don't know what'll happen, so I'm making I sure I do what I can so I don't regret not doing it... I've had enough of that..." he said downcast. I'm not sure what he meant but I think it was what he was referring to earlier.
"What are you going to do?..." I asked worried about what his dark hints at the future.
"I saw a bit of trouble today with the «Army»... I've got a kid to rescue..." he said seriously. I was heartened to hear him speak such words. I guess he's not so selfish after all...
"I hope you succeed. Do your best, Kirito-kun..." I said encouragingly. Until the end of this game, I was going to show him my support.
"That means a lot from you, Asuna..." Kirito said appreciatively. "Goodbye..." he said a little disheartened.
"Goodbye..." I said dejected seeing him walk away. "I'll miss you..." I whispered. I think he heard, because he turned back and walked over to me. He grasped both my hands in his and I couldn't stop blushing. I was really surprised by him today.
"I'll miss you too..." he said endearingly. Then he narrowed his eyes in deep sorrow.
"I'm sorry..." he said painfully. I was confused by what he said.
"For what?..." I asked wondering why he looked so hurt.
"I can't... just... don't think about me too much. It's just not right..." he said dejectedly. I think I got what he said but I didn't want to accept it. Suddenly my heart started throbbing incessantly in pain.
"Why?..." I asked almost reduced to tears.
"You'll understand one day... I just don't deserve this... you need to be strong... for me, please?..." he said desperately. I turned my head away and shook in my inability to accept his words. Why was he so harsh to bring this upon me now?... I thought he had... the same feelings as I did...
He looked disgusted by myself but he let go of my hands. He put his right hand gently on my left shoulder but I shook him off. Now I couldn't take it, and I started crying.
He looked like he wanted to comfort me, but refrained from doing so. He sighed one last time and walked away. I think I heard him say something.
"I'm sorry, Asuna... but it's for the best."
His footsteps faded away. In my mind a strong dislike started to form for him. But in my heart, I was screaming for him to come back.
What was for the best? I just didn't understand why... the unknown answer was just killing me...
Kirito-kun... why?
I left Asuna pretty disappointed. No, that's an understatement, I left her in an emotional wreck. I felt utterly sorry for her, and I hated myself and the guilt inside that returned to haunt me.
But I had my reasons.
Truthfully, I've been losing reason to keep pushing on. I wondered if it was because I wasn't trying hard enough. Then I realized, it was because of Asuna. The more time I spent with her, the less I cared about everything else... she seemed to be the only person that mattered when it was just us...
But that was wrong. I don't deserve to meet someone like her. Inside, despite all the pride I hold on my shoulders, the arrogance I display, the mask of cool indifference I wore, I was really weak. It felt like I wanted to depend on Asuna.
What I've learned is that emotions tie you down, and they hurt like hell. That's why I distanced myself in the first place. From everyone. From Sugu, from grandfather, from my aunt and uncle, from Klein, Argo, Agil, even Asuna...
But she grew close to me... too close...
I would never admit it out loud, but a day without her seems a day wasted. I never had feelings like this before for anyone. It was probably because I was afraid.
If I let these emotions get in the way, I might not have the will to clear the game. I have to be cold and ruthless to end this nightmare. Not just for me, but for Asuna and everyone trapped here. I can't just be selfish and tie myself down with Asuna... after all I did I didn't deserve to have a companion. I needed to keep fighting, and never stop. Not til this was over, then I would say I was sorry and try to fix what I threw away with Asuna. I just hoped she would forgive me. This was my means to an end. It doesn't matter if I'm alone, just as long as it pays off.
So there you have it. I hurt Asuna because I was afraid of putting her in danger. Yeah, maybe if I was more tactful I would ask her before disappointing her so heavily, but I didn't want to consult her and risk changing my mind. I couldn't be with her, she deserved better than me. I know where I stood. Between dying and Asuna, I'd rather be alone and die for her than be with her and risk both of us dying. I wouldn't forgive myself if I couldn't protect her.
I'm an idiot, I know that. There's probably bound to be better solutions than this, but isn't it better this way? I half-expected Asuna to hate me now, but at least that way she would be strong. She would be desensitized if I died. She would be able to do what's right for everyone. Let's face it, I know that said I hated guilds and any form of teamwork, but she changed my mind. I saw what could be possible. She needed to strong for everyone, including me. That's why she was the one who joined a guild and I didn't. If I saw a teammate die, I probably couldn't take it. Why?
Guilt. It was the guilt that consumed me. Ever since I quit kendo, my grandfather was heavily disappointed. It was two years and I got bored. He scolded me and even beat me up, but my sister stepped in to save me. She said she did enough for the both of us and told my grandfather to stop. I would never forget that.
I owed my sister so much, and how did I repay her? Distancing myself because I was a coward. That's why I wanted to be the best. Being the best means you don't have to rely on anyone... I was a scared, naive kid who couldn't deal with his emotions. I just didn't know how to express my feelings that I bottled inside.
Sugu... if I do make it back, I want to dedicate my life to make you happy again... I'm so sorry...
I kept walking with tears in my eyes.
Asuna... if you ever forgive me, I'll never leave your side again... I- I- love-
I sighed. I sounded so stupid. What did I know about love?...
I continued to walk outside of town. A wolf spawned in front of me.
The surroundings were dark, I was in a wheat field. No one, just me, and my prey.
It must've been looking for sheep to eat or something, seeing as it licked its lips hungrily. I pulled out my sword and tensed myself up to kill it.
Asuna... I thought.
This is for you...
A/N And the end of another chapter! I hope that surprised you enough. What did you think? Good? Bad? Poorly edited?(I hope not) Anyways, in the next chapter or so, I'm going to try and speed up the floor advancement. You'll see more characters coming in as well. If you like the story, thank you for reading! If not... well thanks for reading anyway. Please R & R! Thanks for your time~