BENEATH THE SURFACE

Part Twenty-Two

Rogue felt as if she were starting to lose her resolve when it came to being married to Remy LeBeau. Since the moment she'd married him, she'd felt like there had never been a moment that hadn't been filled with drama or his temper and mood swings.

She had been uneasy all night and it wasn't merely because of the sexual frustration thanks to his approach in the cave, which had been sudden, rough and slightly startling...although not completely unwelcome after a little coercion. Being left close to climax and having been dropped had left her feeling frustrated and unfulfilled...but it wasn't entirely the reason she'd been so frustrated and unable to settle all night afterwards.

Rogue was unable to get it out of her head...Remy had simply never been like that with her before. His approach was usually more romantic and gentle, not rough, demanding and desperate. The hot breath against her, the way his groin had pressed at her backside and he'd been grinding against her, the way he'd held her to the wall. It was so different (although not necessarily unpleasant).

As she lay in bed that Sunday morning after having had no sleep, she reached out to check her phone for the time, it was after seven, a reasonable time she supposed for being awake. As she picked the phone up, at once she spotted the long thin bruises, right where his fingers had held onto her; she hadn't realised quite how thin her wrists were nor how large his hands had been until that moment and she touched the bruises thoughtfully; marks of passion, evidence of getting carried away.

His behaviour had been so erratic...so worrying. His sudden need to go; she wasn't sure she believed that embarrassing claim of his that he'd text her as being the reason he'd run off so quickly.

The lighting made it hard to tell...she'd certainly felt the excitement against her when he'd been grinding at her backside, but she hadn't noticed if he was still aroused by the time he'd left.

Something else had been wrong, the nervous way he'd been acting; he should have been relaxed after the first encounter but he'd become so quickly wound up about the thought she might have been practising her skills on other men. Her experience of him sexually was very limited, but she'd never known him to become so excited so quickly after an encounter.

Ah guess Ah should expect that, she supposed. All the rumours about him bein' a sure thing...the things that hooker in Louisiana said...guys like Remy aren't a one-bang-a-night kind. Ah suppose Ah'm supposed to be thankful for that maybe – there's probably forty year old housewives out there who'd kill for Remy's type, she shook her head at herself for thinking it.

His rambling weighed on her, he wasn't much to ramble like that. Promising dates, and romance and diamonds and trips to Italy and Paris...all the things he already knew she didn't want from him.

He always offers those things when he knows he's done somethin' to upset or annoy me, Rogue realised, remembering the times he'd gotten drunk and he'd suggest those things the day after, the clothes shopping and fancy cake shops and buying her perfume at the Chanel store as if he had thought it would make everything okay.

Rogue sighed, thinking of everything. The impromptu date in the cave had felt like a disaster and she had only meant it to be special for him. The night before she'd been pouring over those sex videos online until two in the morning, taking mental notes. She'd looked at what must have been a hundred of them (not much of a hardship, not many of them seemed to last more than two or three minutes a time), and she'd looked at several websites for tips and pointers, body burning with embarrassment and a slight tinge of danger of being caught looking at such filthy material, all the while practising how she would respond if someone caught her, how she'd retort with it being her legal right to look at pornography if she wished (and then thinking up the real excuse she'd give that she was watching an episode of True Blood that was slightly more graphic than usual).

When he'd said he needed this when he'd come to her room, it had been a little soon, she'd hoped for a few more days or even a week. She'd hoped for maybe a way to find something to practise with so that she didn't seem so inexperienced for the first time she tried to please him. It had occurred to her there was rather obnoxiously large cucumber in the fridge downstairs, but she wasn't sure how she was going to smuggle it upstairs without seeming suspicious (she could only imagine the things that they might think she'd have done with it, and practising oral sex was probably not the first thing that was going to come to mind for most of the sick minded kids in the mansion).

Never the less, when he'd come to her, practically begging, it had occurred to her that perhaps it was the perfect opportunity, she was almost looking forward to the experience despite her anxiety about it. He'd somewhat enjoyed sex as far as she could tell, but she was certain he would love that kind of attention, the kind of attention he was used to getting from the normal girls. In Baymart, when he'd picked up the flavoured condoms she had known he was joking (or at least half-joking), and it had taken her a moment to think (as she'd stood looking at conditioner) that perhaps she should be a little more accommodating to his needs...especially if she expected to keep him.

It occurred to her that if he was willing to almost get into a fight over Tabitha at school, then Tabitha could easy sway him with charm and her experience (and Rogue had heard a lot about that). To keep him, she had to keep him interested, and giving into one of his favourite things (and being good at it) wasn't going to hurt. Why not give in? What could be so bad about it? Yes, the act had made her a little squeamish at first, he didn't have a particularly attractive appendage (at least in her very limited experience) and the thought of being down and much closer to it didn't leave her all that aroused nor inspired.

But then...she had thought of how he'd talked so brazenly in the car about the things he'd like to do to her. If she hadn't heard the rumours about him, hadn't heard Brandy Buckfast's stories about him and his 'talented tongue' Rogue might have thought he was simply giving her a line. But no, when it came to the cards Remy put on the table when it came to his sex life, oral sex was definitely included and he wasn't shy in admitting to it.

It was embarrassing, a little humiliating to think of but...so many women did it every day...so many women (as far as she had heard) even liked it. She'd been thinking on and off since they'd first started becoming more sexually involved that eventually he was going to expect it, and she'd been anxious about the day that would happen, full of notions that after she'd done so he would brag about it to people. After all, he had these stories about things he'd done with other women, he'd told them.

What if she became one of them?

But for a while they had been sexually involved and nothing had ever been mentioned, for Remy, his relationship with Rogue seemed to remain private, and she was beginning to think perhaps it was time she trusted him with this. She almost also felt it foolish to think that after the rough first week at school and his still being stuck on the New Mutants, not to mention his personal demons, that perhaps a little attention in that direction might help boost his morale.

After giving him what she was sure he needed, it had gone downhill. She felt quite downtrodden about it. You know what the mistake was, she thought. You rushed it, you took a night to get all the tips and techniques, you wore the sheerest top you had and the see-through-ist bra you had in your drawer, and made yourself go from being inexperienced to bein' a slut and made him think that the skill had to have come from somewhere...

Thinking of all these things was giving her a headache. She was sick of replaying the night over and over, wishing she could go back and correct the mistakes. If she'd known he would react so poorly to an excellent blowjob then she'd have just ignored the idea of looking at videos and given him a bad one. At least then no suspicion.

His suspicion still stung, she was angry but she almost strangely understood it. He was so suspicious of anything these days, she supposed it was her own fault for not expecting it, or for not just being honest from the start. She kept wondering what might have happened differently if she'd begun the act by admitting she'd been looking at those things.

Knowin' my luck, he'd have probably still thought Ah was a whore, Rogue rolled her eyes at herself as she pulled herself out of bed. She made sure to hide the bruises on her wrists as she walked to the nearest girls bathroom; it being early on a Sunday, she didn't have to fight for a bathroom. She took a longer shower than usual, water waking her up a little and making her feel more alert. For just a short while, the water on her face somehow helped to clear her head of her anxious and miserable thoughts and regrets. She tried to imagine the hot water washing away all of yesterday, washing clean the stupidity and leaving her as a blank canvas to try and rectify things.

When she got back to her room, shivering a little in her slightly oversized bathrobe, she was somehow not surprised that Tabitha was in it, raking through her makeup drawer yet again.

"Ah gave you makeup already," Rogue commented, unable to hide her irritation as she walked across her room. What was it with this girl and always taking things?

"I need Mascara," Tabitha continued raking.

"Ah gave you mascara!"

"It ran out," Tabitha replied as she picked out the MAC brand mascara that was Rogue's favourite, Rogue swiftly grabbed it from her.

"Not that one," Rogue commented, throwing it back into the drawer, "here, take the Maybelline one, the fallout irritates my eyes anyway."

"Oh, thanks, give me your shitty cast off makeup that's no good," Tabitha rolled her eyes at her.

"Well you could always buy some Mascara, you know, with the money Remy gave you."

"I spent it all," Tabitha replied, she opened the mascara and leaned over the dressing table to look into the mirror, combing it onto her long natural lashes; Rogue had always envied those lashes of hers, girls spent serious amounts of money to have lashes like Tabitha's. The girl was beautiful today, her golden hair loose and softly curled, a loose t-shirt with a wide collar that exposed one perfectly tanned shoulder, Rogue could see the girl wore no bra today, not that she particularly needed to as she seemed to be blessed with the kind of bosom that stood up and out like the kind that the porn stars in those dirty videos clearly paid for. Despite Tabitha's extra weight, she was still curvaceous, her hips jutted out a little, the waistband of her jeans digging into them, her backside was a little rounder but the material hugged them to an almost obscene perfection that Rogue knew was going to make her even more popular at school. Rogue realised she'd have had to have been blind to fail seeing why Remy was attracted to her and she knew he was.

"Well maybe you should go easy on pissing it all away on Doritos and Chips Ahoy," Rogue muttered, not being able to help herself, "before you have to ask for more money to buy clothes that fit!"

Tabitha dropped her eyes, she closed the mascara slowly. Rogue instantly regretted her words. "Keep your mascara," Tabitha commented quietly, dropping it onto the dressing table; she left the room, quietly closing the door, Rogue winced.

Fuck, that was...so not cool...

Remy had been struggling to sleep all night, laying there on the mattress in his room, tossing, turning. He had a slight cough coming to accompany his slight flu and every time he lay down it seemed to settle in his chest so much that he had to prop himself up with his pillows and a few rolled up pieces of clothing just to make sure he couldn't slouch and cause it to do so again.

Even with the lights on bright, he was still afraid of Jean-Luc's presence. Jean-Luc was there whenever he shut his eyes, and then sometimes when he opened them. He'd tried taking a wander around the mansion late at night, almost intent going to Rogue's room even if he did feel awkward about the idea after his behaviour. The thought of lying beside her was far less anxiety-inducing than the thought of Jean-Luc.

Now that his adoptive father had a voice, Remy felt the real fear. It had never had a voice before, this ghost had always been silent, lurking. But now...now he had voice, and influence. He was getting stronger.

Of course, he'd been chased back to bed when Logan had heard him wandering around; Logan had been down in the sub-basement and making his way up when he had caught him. Upon entering his bedroom again, Jean-Luc had been waiting for him.

"Y' think y' can jus' walk away from me? Y' think I won' be there wherever y' go, night and day? We the same, boy, y' stuck wit' me now."

Remy had put on earphones to drown out the sounds of his voice; this seemed to work well although did nothing for getting rid of the visual accompaniment of the ghost. For a while, Remy lay there trying to read A Tale of Two Cities, but he couldn't focus on anything; he was aware of Jean-Luc passing back and forth around the room, from the corner of his eye he saw the movement, saw the shadows in his peripheral vision and it did nothing to help his concentration (not that the book was particularly stimulating either).

Eventually the book must have put him to sleep...or perhaps it was the music. When he was opening his eyes, it was because the sound of his bedroom door had been thrown open. He wasn't sure how long he'd slept for, three hours? Perhaps two, it was hard to tell, he had not been keeping track. The book was still on his chest, his neck still propped on the pillows. He glanced up groggily to see Tabitha running in, eyes glimmering with tears, smudged with mascara.

"Tab?" he asked hazily.

"I don't know what I did to deserve it!" she sobbed.

Sitting up slowly, he swept his hair from his face wearily, "t' deserve wha'?" he asked tiredly, "Wha' I miss?"

"Rogue!" Tabitha snapped, she sniffed, "she's such a bitch!"

Remy felt himself – even in tiredness – slightly offended by the insinuation and couldn't hold his tongue, "don' call her that."

"I don't know why you would be friends with her!"

"Wha' she do?" he rubbed his face.

"She called me fat!"

He moved his hand from his face to stare up at the girl, "What?"

"She called me fat!" Tabitha sobbed, putting her hands to her face.

It seemed so incredibly juvenile to be caught in the middle of a fight about this. Petty squabbles and insults? He almost didn't want to believe it either that Rogue would be so immature to suggest the girl being overweight, but...then he had heard her make those comments before and she hadn't been too apologetic about the fact then either.

"She...called you fat?"

"Yes!" Tabitha howled, "she said I had gained weight and couldn't fit the clothes I had on! And I'd have to ask you for more money so I could buy more!"

Remy tilted his head, "I..." he eyed up Tabitha's jeans, they were cutting into her waist a little. "I don' think that's true," He lied. Better to lie than to be cruel and admit there was vague truth here.

Tabitha sank down to the mattress against him with no invitation, he sighed and patted her back uneasily as she pressed her face to his neck and sobbed into it. He felt her reaction to Rogue quite strange, she hadn't been this upset when she'd seen her father.

"Now now," he tried, sounding rather awkward, "Look, Rogue is jus' a little grumpy in the mornin's...trus' me, I lived with her f' a while...I know it better than any..."

Tabitha sniffled, leaning back, her eyes really black with the mascara now, the lashes having streaked parts of her cheek, "but she's been so...so different since she came back here...she's so...up tight and...so mean to me..."

Remy sighed, "she's...just...up tight because it's the last year o' school..." he explained, "it's her second last year o' school...and she's under so much pressure t' not screw it up this time...anythin' sets her off these days, believe me."

"It doesn't make it right!" Tabitha tried to wipe her face, it made the mess of mascara worse.

Sighing, he pulled himself out of the covers and stood, stretching, "y' know what, y' right...I'll talk t' her, all right?"

"No..." Tabitha tried to stop him, "please don't!"

"Look...let me deal with it, she won' get away with it," he said. He left the room because he was concerned that being caught on the bed with Tabitha at that close a proximity was probably more of a risk to his relationship than going to Rogue with his concerns.

He walked to Rogue's room, still in his pyjamas, tired and still groggy, wishing Tabitha had left him to sleep for just a few more hours before having her melt down. When he got to her room, the door was closed, and he almost considered just walking away.

Y' go in there, y' might get y' head bitten off if she's in that sort of mood, he told himself. Still, without invitation, he pulled open her door and slipped in without invitation.

Rogue was changing, and she didn't hear the door clicking over the music from her iPhone docked in its speaker. She was completely naked, and he hadn't seen her in that condition in a while, she was searching through her drawer for a pair of underwear by the looks of it, and he took a moment, briefly forgetting his anger about her insult to Tabitha and instead admiring the shape of her backside and the dip of her back.

"Look at that," came Jean-Luc's cackle, "she's already waitin' f' it, bend her over that dresser and give it to her hard, whether she want it or not."

Remy frowned. No.

"Y' think she didn' know y' would come f' this. She was waitin' f' y' t' come here! She know y' there...standin' bendin' over like that...it an open invitation."

Remy turned to look at where his adoptive father's ghost was standing, the old bastard looked positively decayed, vampiric and moldy. Even if she did want me, even if she was invitin' me, I ain' got a condom, that'd kill me, he thought angrily at him.

"Y' never know 'til y' try."

Rogue found a pair of underwear – Remy was too distracted by Jean-Luc or he may have made fun of the fact they had Spongebob Squarepants on them – and turned about to put them on. She let out a yell of surprise at Remy's intrustion.

"Remy!" she cried angrily, she grabbed where she'd thrown a black terricloth robe she'd apparently been wearing, and she pulled it in front of her.

Trying to ignore Jean-Luc, and trying to seem not as awkward or jarred, he responded, "relax...y' ain' got nothin' I haven't looked at by now on y'..." he moved over.

"You didn't even knock!" she admonished.

"Y' my wife...I didn' think I needed to," he said under his breath, "What happened with Tabitha?" he demanded.

"What?" Rogue asked, awkwardly getting into the robe while trying to not show him her body. He thought this as immature as the insult to Tabitha, did she not understand that right now whether she was naked or not didn't matter?

"Tabitha..." he repeated, "what happened with her?"

"Oh..." Rogue shook her head, "she came and started raking through my shit again, just helping herself! She was about to walk away with my thirty dollar mascara," Rogue held up a tube of mascara with the large MAC logo upon it, "and then had the audacity to turn her nose up at a twenty dollar one that Ah offered to give her outright instead!" Rogue picked up the mascara from the dresser after closing her robe, she held it up to him, "I mean it's been used once, what the fuck is her deal?"

"Not that," Remy folded his arms, "what else happened?"

"Ah said she should go buy some, she said she had no money."

"And?"

Rogue stared at him blankly, "And?"

"Explain t' me how y' go from her not havin' money to callin' her fat and a usin' bitch askin' f' money t' buy clothes t' accommodate her size?" he asked coldly.

His wife groaned, "it wasn't like that."

"No?" he asked, "why don' y' tell me."

"Stop wastin' time...rip that robe from her, give her it hard; y' know y' got it in y'," Jean-Luc breathed near his ear, his breath was rancid, Remy felt slightly sick.

Rogue tipped her head back, gazing at the ceiling as if in disbelief, "are you kidding me with this?"

"No, I'm not kiddin'. I'm so beyond not kiddin' it ain' even funny."

"Why does this even concern you?" she frowned.

"It concerns me 'cause that girl is in tears, Marie."

"Ah told you not to call me that-" Rogue began.

"And I tol' y' t' go easy on Tabitha. She's jus' like you, Rogue, she ain' had an easy life. She left home wit' nothin'. If she wants t' take y' fuckin' thirty dollar mascara-" he picked up the tube of MAC mascara from the dresser, "then fucking let her! Y' married t' a fuckin' millionaire, f' fucks sake."

"You said you didn't have that much money!"

"Yeah, well maybe I lied t' keep y' from obsessin' about it," he muttered, "what does it matter? The fact is I got money enough f' both of us and y' actin' petty over a fuckin' tube of thirty dollar fuckin' mascara?" he spat. "Y' want expensive makeup? Go t' y' fuckin' bank account and draw some of the money I put in there and buy all y' want, let Tabitha borrow y' shit if she wants, that's her way."

"This isn't about her borrowing!" Rogue snatched the mascara back from him stubbornly. "She just takes it. When she takes something, she doesn't give it back!"

"Marie..." he warned, he took the mascara back from her, giving her a warning look.

"Ah'm sick of people takin' my things!"

"What, y' mean like Jean took Scott?" Remy looked at her. "Is that what I am t' you? Jus' a thing y' don' wan' lose? That it?"

"Remy!" she gasped.

"Course it is," Jean-Luc laughed. "Y' jus' a possession t' her, she jealous 'cause she know y' find the blonde so much more delectable. She know the blonde be a real fuck like she'll never be. Y' think that blowjob in the cave was about you? Don' be a fool all y' life, boy. She tryin' t' hol' on t' y'...tryin' t' make sure y' don' stray far...y' should have seen her afterwards in the cave...throwin' up...she hated every moment of suckin' y' off. But the blonde? She'll love every moment..."

"That what the thing last night was about?" Remy couldn't help himself from blurting.

"The thing...?" she looked at him blankly.

"The blowjob!" he hissed under his breath.

"Remy!" she gasped, eyes wider than saucers.

"It is, ain' it! Y' tryin' t' keep me from strayin'!"

"Sssh!" Rogue gasped, looking towards the closed door, he could tell she was anxious about who may overhear.

"That's it, ain' it?" Remy snorted, "Y' sucked me off 'cause y' thought it it woul' be protectin' y' investment in me, don' want me walkin' off wit' someone else, right? Like Scott did..."

"No!"

"Bet y' sat there all night thinkin' if y' had sucked him off, he wouldn' be with Jean," he headed for the door.

"Remy!"

"I have done everythin' f' you!" he snapped, "I went t' school, I put up with bein' in the fuckin' New Mutants, I held my tongue regardin' us..." he gestured towards her, "and y' still think that I got it in me t' jus' turn around and cheat?! Throw it all away?! I thought in the cave it was 'cause y' loved me!" he hissed, keeping his voice low, trying to refrain from yelling the words.

"Ah do!" Rogue responded in a small voice, "you...said you needed it..."

"I never said that!" he spat.

"You left the...the condoms in here...you came in here askin' to be alone..."

"I left the condoms in here t' make sure that y' had some jus' in case you wanted t' be the one t' say when."

"And then you came in desperate and said 'I need this'."

"When I came in here I was askin' t' ask t' be alone wit' you..." he stood, hand poised on the door, "all I wanted t' do was wit' y' was fuckin' talk t' y'! But y' turn me away, y' too bothered about what everyone else say or think about that!" he said through gritted teeth. "Everythin' is always about you...even last night, that was about you."

"It wasn't..." Rogue's voice was so small now he barely heard it. The guilt he saw in her pretty green eyes said everything he needed and didn't want to ever here.

"Last night I thought it was me who had to apologise, but y' know what? Maybe it's time you started apologising."

He swiftly left the room and closed the door behind himself, he couldn't help himself from slamming it and he wished he hadn't.

"That it? Y' gon' just walk out? Get back in there! You're not done!" Jean-Luc spat at him.

"Fuck you," Remy muttered to his adoptive father's ghost, and he headed back towards his room, still slightly shaking with anger and anxiety. He was almost afraid he'd perhaps just compromised his entire relationship with Rogue, perhaps he'd just unknowingly ended it?

When he got back to his room, Tabitha was still there on his bed, drying her tears on his beige sheet, leaving grey smudges on the cotton. Yes, the girl tended to leave her mark on people and on things, it seemed. He supposed he'd have to wash those sheets now, otherwise Rogue would see and assume it had been from Tabitha frolicking on his bed.

Tabitha looked up at him almost fearfully, waiting for an elaboration on what had happened; he wasn't about to offer one. He dropped the MAC mascara he'd taken from Rogue's room onto the bed, she looked down at it speechless.

"Go clean y' face up," Remy said, he coughed a little, all the yelling and hissing at Rogue had left him feeling a little hoarse. Sighing, he moved to the dresser and yanked out clean clothes.

"Huh?"

"I said go clean y' face up, fix y' makeup or whatever y' need t' do...meet me down at the van in like, I don't know, half an hour."

"But...why?"

"We goin' shoppin' f' Makeup."

Remy hated every moment of shopping at the department store. Going from counter to counter with Tabitha as she tried eyeshadows, lipsticks and liners on her hand, it was excruciating. How much makeup did a girl possibly need? How many different shades did she have to try before she happened on the right one? He spotted some kids from school who saw them together and he realised they probably assumed them a couple. He wasn't sure if that was good; it might be better for Tabitha but not for him and his relationship with Rogue.

Jean-Luc for some reason had decided not to follow them to the department store; if he had, Remy was yet to see him. Although he felt relaxed for now that the ghost was not with him, he still felt most unhappy.

"You're quiet," said Tabitha she was smudging a bright turquoise eyeshadow onto the back of her tanned hand, examining how it shimmered in the light.

"Yeah, forgive me, I ain' exactly an expert when it comes t' shoppin' f' war paint," Remy said, he picked up an eyeshadow palette with a sigh, examining the stunning colours of purple within. The price tag told him the item was seventy dollars. "Are y' fuckin' kiddin' me wit' this by the way?" he asked, gesturing to the palette.

"Hmm?" Tabitha took it from him, "oh...seventy, huh? Yeah, that's...you know, that's the higher end stuff that only the rich people buy."

He turned it over in his hands, "she kind of likes purple, doesn't she?" he asked absently, he turned his head, put the tissue he'd been carrying in his pocket to his mouth and started coughing, he was getting rather sick of this cough.

"Huh? Who?"

"Ma-" he caught himself from saying Rogue's real name, it would give everything away. He coughed for another moment, using it as a excuse to cut into the name. "Mean ol' Rogue," he said.

"Purple? Yeah, most of her eyeshadows are purple...or green. She likes green, I guess..." Tabitha shrugged, looking rather disheartened at the mention of it.

Remy began picking things out from the large range in the high-end display. Black eyeliner, mascara, a few different eyeshadow palettes. He even found himself opening a tester of lipstick to see if it was dark enough for Rogue's liking. How dark did she wear her lipstick? Had it been purple she'd been wearing last night? When she'd had her mouth on him, he'd been far too excited to look.

"What are you doing?" Tabitha eyed up the makeup going in.

"I kind of blew up at her this morning 'cause of this whole thing," Remy responded, "she's still my friend...I can't just...not make up for that."

"Wow..." Tabitha blinked, "she called me fat and she's getting the hundred dollars worth of Clinique?"

"Yeah, well, in her defence..." Remy chewed the inside of his cheek as he picked up a bottle of perfume and sprayed it onto Tabitha's sleeve before lifting her arm to sniff it; if he was going to give Rogue perfume, he wanted to be sure he might like the smell too. "In her defence...I was...really an asshole this morning to her..."

"Y' a fuckin' fool, y' know that? That mutant bitch is the asshole...and y' jus' bein' a bigger asshole lettin' y' fuckin' think it's all you!"

Remy had been wondering when Jean-Luc would return.

"Y' gon' give her hundreds of dollars worth of makeup and perfume when she the one who need t' apologise t' you."

Shut up, Remy warned him in thought, he sniffed hard at Tabitha's sleeve, but couldn't detect it, "think my nose is blocked again," he sighed.

"Yeah, you've been kind of run down the past few days," Tabitha said, "you need to get something for that cough too, my room is above yours and I heard every cough last night."

"Sorry."

"I was gonna try and come down but I couldn't find any cough syrup to bring...they kind of lock that stuff away."

"I'm fine," Remy said, "I don' like t' take medications."

"Nothin' wrong with a little cough syrup, I can tell your throat hurts...it'll help..." Tabitha reached up and brushed the backs of her fingers against his cheek.

"Don't," Remy pushed her hand away gently, "If my wife-"

"Your wife isn't here."

"Not the point."

"You need someone to take care of you," Tabitha said softly, "especially with this whole ghost thing."

"Don't..." Remy shook his head, he stifled a cough into the tissue, "don't talk about that here."

"Why?" asked Jean-Luc, smirking. "You afraid?"

Tabitha picked up a lipstick tester, she stared into the mirror as she applied it to her lips.

"Ain' y' a bit squeamish about who's used that before y'?" he asked, quickly changing the subject.

The blonde snorted, "a lipstick?" she asked, pouting her bright red lips at the mirror for the moment, "I'm sure you've read the things written on the stalls in the boys restroom at school...about the things I've done..."

He rolled his eyes.

"And you think what's on a lipstick is going to make me squeamish?"

Remy frowned, "I don' need t' hear about that."

"You're no stranger to those things, Remy. Don't try and act like it makes you uncomfortable."

"It does. Once upon a time it wouldn' have been an issue, but a lot has changed."

"I'm just saying," Tabitha laughed a little, "just someone's lips been on it, you've kissed strangers before, haven't you?"

"Yes," he supposed.

"There you go," she playfully pushed the lipstick towards his mouth, smearing it onto him..

"Stop it," he warned her, he wiped his mouth. "I'm not in the mood t' day for playin' around. I jus' wan' get some makeup and go home and go to bed."

Tabitha raised an eyebrow, "that sounded really weird."

"I don' care how it sounded, Tabitha, I'm just really not in the mood. I ain' slept a wink all night."

"I know, I heard your coughing," she reminded again.

"Sorry."

"Stop apologising," Tabitha sighed, "You're bein' such a great guy, you have nothing to apologise for...no one else would do this for me..." she picked up a brand new tube of the lipstick she'd tried, "can I have this?"

"Get what y' want, I don' care."

"So..." Tabitha said, dropping the lipstick into his basket, "is...the reason you didn't sleep to do with the ghost?"

He sighed, looking away, Jean-Luc was lingering right up behind her. "What make y' think that?"

"Just a guess, I mean, you were so messed up about it yesterday, and that doesn't really go away overnight."

"I guess it doesn't," Remy picked up a set of expensive makeup brushes, "does Rogue have this set?"

Tabitha eyed up the set, "Uhm...I don't think so."

"I'll get y' a set too, okay?" he asked, picking another up and throwing both in the basket, "that way y' don' have t' borrow hers."

Tabitha's cheeks flushed a little.

"Y' need t' stop that, by the way," he moved along to a different display, examining the various makeups and foundations, he didn't see anything pale enough that Rogue would use so he supposed he would have to give that a miss.

Tabitha followed, saying nothing.

"Y' makin' people mad. They ain' like us, they don't get what it's like t' really have nothin'. T' rely on takin' from others t' survive and get by," he explained softly.

Quiet, she picked up a mascara tube, examining the details on the back although he was certain she didn't know anything about the ingredients, she simply didn't have much to say and was pretending to be concentrating on something else.

"I get it kind of...helps..."

Her eyes fell to the floor.

"Takin', right? When y' take and y' don't get caught...it makes y' feel a little better..."

She slowly turned to look at him guiltily.

"The rush of sneakin' in...and...swipin' somethin'...the hidin' it in y' pocket, knowin' it there and the person who owns it don't. I used t' get a lot of thrills robbin' people blind...pick pocketin'. Me and my adoptive brother Henri...we used t' go out durin' Mardi Gras, I'd do tricks f' attention, card tricks, bottle tricks...cellphone in a bottle, that's one of my faves...he'd go from person t' person pickpocketin'...then we'd make off wit' all the loot. Y' left on such a high...didn't matter if y' stole somethin' that meant somethin' t' someone...'cause y' needed that money. Pay off Jean-Luc's debts 'fore he got himself killed by gangsters...pay the bank 'fore they foreclosed on the house. Later, we stole t' fund the bigger jobs. T' make money, y' have t' spend money...flights, hotel rooms, equipment, bribes, blueprints and weapons. They all cost..."

"How much did you make?"

"Millions..." he responded quietly.

"Bullshit," she accused.

"It's the truth," he sighed. "One year I stole three paintin's...got a good hundred thousand each time. I went t' an underground poker game one night, made two million after walkin' in wit' two hundred grand. Went t' Vegas f' a weekend, won ten...nearly got killed over it, but it was a rush. I was a prodigy in the guild...one of the best. I shouldn' have reached the rank of master so fast..."

"So you really were in a guild? I thought that was like...a rumour."

"No...it was real...trained from age twelve, practisin' by fourteen and proficient enough t' work alone by sixteen."

"But that's like...impossible...I mean, you're only eighteen now and you have millions?"

"I had way more than I got now..." he sighed. "I gave a lot of money t' Jean-Luc...thought it'd get him off my back...instead of usin' it t' pay his debts and give us a good life, he gambled it t' try and double it, ended up penniless. Every time I give him or Henri money that's how it'd end up. Jean-Luc piss it away on booze...and gamblin', Henri wit' drugs and women and fast cars he'd wreck. Tried t' buy nice things f' the house but they always got wrecked...him in his drunken states...Henri in his drug stupors and bad moods when he was withdrawin'," Remy picked up a nailpolish bottle curiously, examining the shimmering purple colour. "I had tons of money that they both stole, I got smart and set up some bank accounts off shore, I got aliases on a lot of different continents, money tied up on each. My retirement money, I suppose."

"When are you going to retire?"

"Before I'm old, preferably," Remy said, "me and my wife...retire somewhere, have a nice life. Always thought it would be St. Tropez, funny enough..." he admitted.

"What's funny about that?" Tabitha raised an eyebrow at him.

"'Cause...y' know, that's where I was when—oh..." he shook his head, "never mind..." he kicked himself mentally. He forgot that Tabitha did not know about St. Tropez.

"No...what do you mean?"

"Just...that that's where me and her went for our Honeymoon..." Remy answered truthfully. "Only...I...kind of fucked it up."

"How?" Tabitha asked interestedly.

"I...guess I was upset...about stuff that happened wit' Jean-Luc, I...guess I didn't deal with it right...and...I was stupid. Got drunk every night..."

"Everyone gets drunk every night on vacation, though, don't they?" Tabitha tried to console.

"It...weren' about fun...I was tryin' t' loosen up enough t' tell her about the things that went on but...I couldn' get it out. I'd take a drink t' help steady my nerves, get the confidence, and it didn't help, and I'd try harder and it just got more difficult and...then I don't remember a lot of the rest."

"Sorry," Tabitha said sympathetically.

"She forgave me f' a lot of shit I probably didn' deserve t' be forgiven for," he supposed, turning the nailpolish in his hands. I suppose I ain' really owed much apology after everythin' I put her through, he thought dully. Maybe I'm bein' unreasonable.

"Do you miss her?" Tabitha asked softly.

"She's the type o' girl that y' could miss even bein' two feet away from," Remy confessed, a slight unhappy smile stretching his lips. Yes, even though Rogue was so near to him most times, he missed her more than he could ever vocalise.

"How come you don't have any pictures of her?" Tabitha asked.

"I do...I just...I didn' put them in a frame is all..." he put the nailpolish down deciding against buying it for Rogue, she'd probably never wear it under her gloves anyway, who would see it? "Y'...y' wan' see a picture of her?" he asked.

"Yeah, sure," Tabitha nodded, her expression curious.

Remy took his phone from his pocket, and leaving the basket on the floor, he began swiping through photos on his phone, he had one particular photo in mind, a digital copy that had been sent to him after the wedding. He isolated the photo by making it his lock screen wallpaper, and he hit the lock button, he held the phone out to Tabitha. "There..."

Tabitha examined the screen, the picture of he and Rogue on their wedding day, they were facing each other at the alter, no one would ever have been able to tell that it was Rogue beneath that jewel sprinkled veil and that beautiful silver-white dress. The false tan on Rogue's arms hid her true pallor, the veil hid her identity. She could have been everyone.

And yet, as obscure as the photo was, Remy felt a certain sense of pride being able to show the photo to someone. To show the moment when his wife had put a ring on his finger and taken him for better or worse.

Mostly worse.

"She's so thin..." Tabitha said, looking a little intimidated, "and tall..."

"She were wearin' heels," Remy said, "I remember she walked barefoot, I was holdin' her shoes. We went t' this old fashioned big band night club that night and we...danced t' Frank Sinatra..." he smiled, suddenly feeling a little happier, "I Guess I'll Have to Dream the Rest...that was the song..." he closed his eyes, almost being able to hear it. "And...the other song..." he opened his eyes, staring into space, "What was it..." he started humming the tune he had in his head, aware of Tabitha's staring, and not caring. He began singing under his breath, so low, so gentle, slightly raspy in his cough-ruined voice, "-you can go to extremes...with impossible schemes...you can laugh when your dreams fall apart at the seams..." he shook his head and laughed nervously, "Young at Heart...that was it. sorry...jus'...I don' usually get t' talk about it..."

"Why not?"

"No one supposed t' really know back home...bad influence and all..." he shrugged. "Prof wants it on the down low, thinks it might encourage the others t'...y' know, take things further."

Tabitha's expression was a little sad, "You really do love her," she sighed.

"More than anyone," he admitted softly, he took his phone from her, it was still locked and she hadn't tried to unlock it (although if she had, she'd have found it was passworded with a pin number that only he knew).

She stared at the display of blushes, he could see it weighing on her mind.

"If things were different, Tab," he tried to console, he touched her shoulder gently, "I don't know, I think maybe me and you might have had something different..." he explained. He wasn't certain of this, he was certain that he may have bedded her, but nothing else. He wouldn't have cared for more, never had cared for more until Rogue had come along. "Thing is..." he continued, "if it weren't f' my wife...I don' think I'd be the guy I am now...I don' think I'd have taken the time t' get t' know y' f' you...I don' think I would wan' be y' friend."

"Really?" she asked.

"I think I'd have...been an asshole t' y'...and used y'...and then not cared...y' know?" he reached down and took her hand, and squeezed it, "it's 'cause I love Marie that...finally I can start thinkin' about carin' 'bout other people...if I hadn't met her, if I hadn't married her...the guy y' lookin' at now...he wouldn' be the same guy."

Tabitha smiled, but it was a sad smile.

He let go of her hand, "Y' beautiful, and charmin', and funny, and sexy...and y' a lovely girl," he said, "and y' wastin' y' time wit' high school jocks and assholes who get y' number from a bathroom stall...'cause there's guys who do like y' f' you...y' know that, right?"

She sighed, shaking her head, "yeah, but they don't get it, do they?"

"Not 'til y' tell them," he supposed.

"I guess you would know about not telling," Tabitha seemed thoughtful.

"It's harder wit' me."

"Why? Why is it harder for you?" she raised an eyebrow at him.

"When it boils down t' it..." he picked up a blusher palette, he couldn't remember if Rogue even wore blush, "I don' think I could handle my wife knowin'."

"Because...?" Tabitha queried.

"Because..." Remy frowned, "men are s' posed t' be brave...and be able t' fight..."

"You were twelve," Tabitha threw a look at him, "You probably couldn't have fought a puppy."

Remy dropped his eyes, "I weren' always twelve."

"When did it stop?"

Shaking his head, Remy didn't answer, he picked the basket and moved away, he heard Tabitha's quick steps as she caught up to him.

"I answered you when you asked how old I was, isn't about time you started at least sharing?"

"I've shared enough," he looked in to the basket, "I got all I think I need t' make my apology t' Rogue. If we're done here, I'd like t' pay and get outta here."

"Fine," Tabitha said, she threw in the items she'd been holding, "But we're gonna talk later about this."

"Don' hold y' breath."

Tabitha stopped him, "Remy...I was thinking about the ghost..."

"Didn' I already say drop it?"

"No. You asked me to stop asking about your childhood...not about the ghost," she pointed out. "So anyway...I was thinking about what we could do about it..."

"What we could do?" he asked with a sigh, "Tabitha, it's my problem, not yours. There's no we in this."

"I know, but...that doesn't mean I can't help you figure something out," Tabitha pointed out.

He looked away from her, feeling rather reluctant to talk about this subject as it was.

"You can't just let it sit like this, you have to deal with it."

"And how am I supposed t' do that? Call the fuckin' Ghostbusters?"

"Maybe," Tabitha suggested, although there was no humour in her eyes, "There's people out there who deal with that kind of stuff...parapsychologists..."

"Yeah, sure," he muttered, "I'll go call Paranormal State and Most Haunted right now and book an episode...then I can have everyone think I lost my damn mind once the episode airs...it'll be a riot."

Jean-Luc chuckled near his ear, "They don' need t' think y' lost y' mind, son, they already know it."

"No...not those types of parapsychologists," the blonde frowned, "serious ones. Maybe from the university..."

"And then what?"

"They'll investigate."

"No...what they'll do is they'll want t' put me int' a lab t' research me. Mutants are fuckin' lab rats t' scientists, that's all we'll ever be. I ain' bein' anyone's lab rat."

"Why would they want to research you?" Tabitha made a face.

"'Cause y' know what their assumption gon' be...that it's all either in my head or it's my powers makin' everythin' happen. They'll wan' use me as some kind o' proof...especially the skeptics."

"Proof of what?"

"That there aren't any real ghosts, that it's just some kind o'...I don' know...latent mutant ability that gives us the power t' project 'em, strong enough t' make 'em even real enough f' humans t' see..."

"You're being paranoid."

"I'm being smart. No scientists, no parapsychologists, no labs."

"What about a medium then?" Tabitha said after another moment of consideration.

"I don't need a medium," Remy frowned. To him a medium was pointless, he could already talk to and hear the bastard, he could see him. Involving a medium was completely pointless as far as he could see.

"But you could use a medium to comm-" Tabitha began.

"Communication is not this thing's problem," Remy interrupted, "can we please just drop this?"

"You should go to the Professor," Tabitha suggested, "maybe he can like...I don't know, talk to it or something."

"Look," Remy frowned, "don' y' think that if he could sense the ghost he'd have noticed it by now. Thing has been steps from him and he ain' so much as batted an eyelid...no one has, not Jean, not the Professor, not even Logan seems t' be able t' sense it. I'm the only one wit' any awareness o' it...and t' them and anyone else who knows, it's all gon' be assumed that I am losin' my fuckin' mind."

"I don't know what else we can do," Tabitha sighed.

"We don' got t' do anything. It's what I can do, and right now, I jus' got t' put up wit' it."

"You can't just deal with this alone, Remy."

"I have to. I can't expect help wit' somethin' others can't see, and I'm not gon' be judged f' seein' what they don't. They already watchin' me like a fuckin' hawk as it is," he grumbled.

"So...what now?"

"Right now, I'm jus' hopin' if I keep ignorin' the bastard, it'll go away."

"If only it were that simple, eh, son?" Jean-Luc smirked darkly. "If only it were that simple."

END OF PART TWENTY-TWO

Thanks to those who took the time to review the last chapter, it's always interesting hearing from you guys. Some very interesting opinions, I always appreciate reading them.

I want to throw out a huge shout out and thanks to Heartbreak Lane, who has been giving me some advice and help on a few issues in some of the later chapters (especially chapter 39 and 40)...even if it has just been discussing character reactions and about choices, it's always helpful and I appreciate it so much :)

Anyway, I'm off to watch Breaking Bad (season 4). I hope you all have a fantastic weekend. :) You all rock :)