Very long chapter: Also a warning for X Cert towards the end of the story.
Next day the kids turned up to school as usual and expected to be doing sums with Mr Keogh. However, they were asked to go straight to the Assembly hall.
"As it would be unfair to expect you to do any lessons before the mini bus comes for us all at four o' clock, we're going to have a day of games with a two hour lunch break. It'll be a buffet lunch. Now there's something I need to tell you. Even if we don't win tonight, even if we don't even come second, I want all of you to know that I am so delighted with your performances yesterday. None of you put a foot wrong. I'm proud of you all."
The kids beamed at Mrs Beauchamp; they were still all wondering how they'd live till the end of the evening when the results were given out, but this would help a bit.
Mr Keogh had brought his silly books in again, and Ethan was first to be chosen. There was a difference this time. The child who answered correctly had to nominate the next one to answer.
"Mr Keogh, that's not Pirates of the Wapping Docks, it's Pirates of the Caribeen, and I want Cal to answer the next one."
"Read it out for him then please, Ethan."
"Lukewarm."
Cal didn't get it at first and felt silly as he was the eldest in the class. Then it came to him:
"It's Frozen! Ben, what's wrong with this title and what's the right answer: "The Two-and-a-half Musketeers."
The kids were still giggling at the end of the class. Then Ms Dixon had some more Tai Chi for them… but she'd got them all little animal masks to wear. And they had to shout out their animal noises when she said their names:
"Ethan?"
"Oink! Oink!"
Ethan didn't want to take off his piggy mask to have lunch but one sight of Miss Honey's big brown eyes and he was putty in her hands. She'd done something lovely; she'd made a lovely cake with 'Good Luck Holby Mixed Infants' iced on it. They could all have a piece after they'd eaten their main course. Mrs Beauchamp said nobody was to cut the cake until she'd taken a photo.
A special walk took place afterwards even though it wasn't Dervla Day officially. More singing and suddenly it was time to get washed and into their posh clothes for the judging over at the New Theatre.
"And a big big wee", Ethan said firmly to himself. He knew he was getting scared because he always wanted to wee when he was scared.
Finally, they were sitting in their seats awaiting the entrance of the judges, who would be giving a little talk on each play before the final votes came in.
"I'm discussing the plays with our winners in reverse order, with our choice of winner last. But please remember that it's your votes that will decide the real winner of the competition. Please don't vote yet as your votes won't be counted. We'll ask you to vote when we're ready", announced Mr Spiller. Ms Stone took over:
"So first of all we come to the lowest on our list: "Titania's Dream" by St Cuthbert's School."
Taylor's mouth set into a mean little line.
"Now, please don't misunderstand us. The acting was excellent and the little girl who played Titania was so graceful when she danced. But sadly, this play actually broke the rules. We asked for an original story; this was performed exactly to Shakespeare's original script. We decided against disqualifying, and we'll be letting the public decide the play's merits. But it is a good idea to read the small print in these cases. Okay, then there's "Jacqueline and the Beanstalk…"
Taylor glared at Ms Stone. I hope you have a heart attack and drop down dead, the little girl wished evilly.
Miss Montgomery took over, then it was back to Mr Spiller for the judges' choices for runner up and winner:
"Our runner up, from Newport Junior Dance and Performing Arts, has the delightful title of "Gold, Frankincense and Mer." A lovely story of a mermaid who wants to be human so she can have a human Christmas – what a brilliant concept. But sadly, it was so underused. Our little mermaid gets her wish from the witch; but the witch only wants jewels, there's nothing dangerous about the price. Then the mermaid has a lovely time being human and walking in snow; singing along with the carols, and finally, sharing a home with a kind family on Christmas Day. Beautiful scenes, and great acting… but again, no conflict. We'd have preferred our little Mermaid to have fallen in love with a human man and having to leave him at the stroke of midnight on Christmas Night. How could that have been solved? So, a very worthy runner-up…"
The Holby kids looked at each other in growing excitement. Were they hearing this properly? Ethan was too excited to even want to wee.
"And the winners from us are Holby Mixed Infants with "Thorns". I must admit that when I first started watching, I just thought this school was jumping on the Maleficent bandwagon – but then things took such a different turn! The Prince turns out to be a spiteful slob – wonderful acting there! – and the real hero a handsome young peasant."
Max knew, whatever the outcome, he was going to get 'Pretty Boy Max" chanted at him afterwards. But who cared? He was liking how this was going very much!
"After more great acting from all concerned, we get our shock ending. But then – and I hope none of the cast are offended by this! – we get the real star of the show. A big shout out to Ethan Hardy as a big-headed Director who's cut down to size by his critics. Cue happy ending and a lovely wedding for our Beauty and her hero. So, Holby Mixed Infants are the winners in our opinion… and now it's up to you, audience! Please get your final votes in now; after the break there'll be a special performance from the New Theatre Repertory company, and then the real results!"
Suddenly Mr Spiller felt a mobile phone hitting him directly in the shoulder. Taylor, shouting "You're all big fat stupid pigs!" was removed by a security guard.
The Fierce, Brave Gang actually felt ashamed on her behalf. But not so ashamed they couldn't hug each other in excitement. They missed seeing Mr Spiller discreetly stamping on the mobile phone.
Everybody loved the performance after the break. The performers, dressed as animals, sang a song from "Wind in the Willows". It was the scene where Mr Toad returns to Toad Hall after his misadventures, to find that his ancestral home has been taken over by weasels, ferrets and stoats. His loyal friends vow to help him:
"We'll take off our braces and jackets and coats, and beat up the weasels and ferrets and stoats…"
There was a bit that made Ethan giggle but he did it quietly because it was bad manners to spoil songs:
"Mole hasn't got any braces, Badger will lend him some braces. Badger will lend him some very clean – slightly soiled – braces."
Then the animals bounded offstage, and the three judges came back with the results.
"Gold, Frankincense and Mer" came third.
"The Firebird" was second.
The Mixed Infants hugged each other in fear. Supposing they'd been voted off the face of the earth by Taylor's friends? But then:
"And the worthy winners of the holiday in Disneyland Resort, Paris, are… "
A pause that went on for ever, seemingly….
"HOLBY MIXED INFANTS! Will their Headmistress, Mrs Beauchamp, come on stage and collect her trophy, please?"
Mrs Beauchamp came forward, collected the trophy and even endured Mr Spiller's rubbing up a little too close to her.
"If you can come and see us on Tuesday lunchtime, Mrs Beauchamp, accompanied by one of the teachers if you prefer, we'll hand over all the relevant documents and discuss terms and conditions. But we can guarantee your children won't be disappointed with their holiday."
The mini bus drove home, with all the kids dreaming their separate dreams of the future.
Ethan wanted to meet Micky Mouse and also to get Captain Jack Sparrow's autograph for Ms Chao.
Max and Zoe were going to sneak a few cuddles in on the dark rides.
Cal couldn't wait for all the fear and fun of the dark rides.
Lofty was excited and hoped he'd not be clumsy too much.
Noel and Louise were wondering which teachers would go, apart from Mrs Beauchamp and her sidekick, Miss Freeman.
Mrs Beauchamp and Miss Freeman celebrated, this time, probably wisely, indoors.
If the neighbours heard the celebration song, they wisely shut their eyes to it…
"Connie hasn't got any panties; Rita will lend her some panties. Rita will lend her some very clean – slightly soiled – panties!"
Unfortunately, two days later, it looked as if everybody's happiness was going to be smashed flat by the spiteful act of one little girl.