Disclaimer: I don't own Marvel or Agents of SHIELD… Some line/scenes are taken from various episodes in season one

Thanks to plainmnmemy and Guest for reviewing along with:

Lightningtiger2- I thought Ward and Trip needed some bro time and Ward is most definitely irreplaceable!

Trytoreachout123- I totally agree with you about Fitzsimmons, couldn't have put it better myself!

And eventually shadow375 when you get to this point in the story- hope you're still reading and enjoying!

In honor of us reaching the 20th chapter (Ee!) and just because I really wanted to write something like this, this chapter is a little different from the other chapters but I hope you like it nevertheless.

**This chapter is rated M for some sexual content and language that might not really fall under T

"You need to calm down, not get worked up," Simmons said deliberately and Ward felt his temper flare at her words. Nevertheless, he placed his hands on the Holotable and drew in a breath, trying to channel his emotions.

Until Skye leaned in and whispered, "The memory, was it about your brother?"

"Drop it." Ward said curtly, giving her a steely look. Couldn't she see he was trying to get it under control, trying to push it all away?

"Ward." She never broke her gaze, "If you need to get it out, I am here." She emphasized the last part.

He felt his anger bubble up again and let it flow past his defenses, "Right, to talk. Because that's what you do, talk. And talk. Don't you ever get tired of hearing your own voice?" He moved closer to her, threateningly. She could never keep to herself, could she? Always trying to help, always moving that mouth of hers as if it could get her out of every situation.

Maybe that was why he liked her so much.

"Well this makes much more sense now!" Simmons blurted as Ward stopped himself from punching Fitz for touching his shoulder.

"Ward, what you're experiencing, this feeling, is chemistry." Simmons explained as if it solved everything. Ward looked at Skye, his heart beating even faster and despite his earlier words about never panicking, he started to a little. He had denied his feelings for her for as long as possible but he couldn't argue with the facts of science. That whatever he felt for Skye, this chemistry, was there. And once Fitzsimmons and god forbid, Skye, found that out, everything would go to shit.

Skye's eyes were still wary as she said, "I hope so,"

Ward's heart jumped unnaturally. Could she feel it too? Was her expression softening because she wanted him as much as he wanted her? Simmons rambled on and Ward shut his face down, breaking eye contact with Skye to look at the biochemist. No matter what she felt, it didn't matter. To hell with his own feelings too. He was on a mission.

Then Skye looked away from him, hurt written all over her face for a few precious seconds, looking everywhere but him and he felt himself get upset again.

"Does everything just…roll off your back?"

"No. If it helped, I'd rage all the time but it doesn't." She said casually and Ward looked down, contemplating her words. She was so wise sometimes, so elegant with the way she viewed things.

He started slowly, "What I saw… it was about my brother,"

She turned her lips up in a sad smile, "I figured," Her voice… it was so gently and understanding. So full of emotion. He needed someone like her in his life.

"I know you're not one to talk," She placed a small hand on his wrist and he looked down as he felt her light touch send a longing feeling to the pit of his stomach that made him want to sit her on the bar and make love to her until the last of the Berserker rage fled from his body.

"…My shoulder's free."

He looked up and met her gaze after clearing his head. He held her gaze for a few heartbeats, the feeling returning, wondering what could have been…

Then he looked away before he could succumb to his deepest desires, making up the excuse that he was tired. He had to stop this before it got too dangerous. Before he felt too much. As he pulled away from her soft touch, he could feel his rejection poisoning the air between them.

"Another time, maybe." He amended, when I'm not Hydra and when I can afford to care for someone else.

"You know where I live," She said, the mood lightening and he snuck one last glance at her before leaving the bar. One last night where he would allow himself to imagine what could have happened if there was no such thing as a mission.

The next time he allowed himself to feel for her was when she got shot. Hadn't he explicitly told Garret that she was off fucking limits? He had asked for one thing. One thing! And now… now, she was dying and for what? Why did Garrett let this happen?

After he had given himself that moment to rage, he pulled himself together and tried to mend his relationship with May. She had seen his reaction to Skye's shooting and he couldn't afford for her to think that it wasn't because he was Skye's SO. A job he had taken on not only because it strengthened his cover with his team but because he hoped that when the time came-and it would- she could be able to defend herself against him.

He sat by her bedside whenever he could- which wasn't often because Coulson was always there. Once he heard she was awake, it took him everything he had to not go sprinting down to her makeshift hospital pod. When he finally did go to see her, it was worth the wait.

"I must look terrible! Simmons won't even bring me a mirror," She ran her hands over her face and smiled at him.

"I've seen worse," He replied, you look gorgeous.

She smiled again, somewhat grudgingly, "Wow, thanks,"

"Yeah, well, I mean you look better than when you were dying," He said hastily.

"Swingin' and miss em, Ward." Skye smirked down at her hands and he grinned like an idiot. God, he missed her.

"It's great to see you," He said sincerely. She would never know how great.

Then Skye began to rag on herself and lament over Mike Peterson and he couldn't stand it. She shouldn't feel bad about what had happened; she was an innocent person that got caught in the crossfire of something she should be far, far away from.

"He needs help," Skye said compassionately but Ward cut her off.

"He's past help." Like me. Ward told her Peterson should've protected her but he knew there was no way Deathlok would have been able to do that. Ward was just upset he couldn't have foreseen what was going to happen and stop it. He was the one who should have protected her.

After Lorelei and after she was cleared from the med pod, all he wanted to do was push her up against the wall and kiss her senseless.

When she kissed him in the closet at the Hub, it was the single best feeling he had ever experienced in his life. It was that kiss he thought of before he pulled the trigger on Agent Hand, crossing the line for good. To say that he didn't look back would've been a lie. He did, every night when he was alone and out of the watchful eyes of John Garrett. Because after Garrett had been made, all he wanted to do was pull her into a secluded room and fuck her against the wall until the world fell away and it was just him and Skye until it became time for him to emerge as the biggest traitor ever known. When he arrived at Providence and saw her standing at the entrance waiting for him, his heart tore a little. She was so beautiful, so pure and he was there to play her and corrupt her. As soon as his lips met hers in Eric's office, he felt his heart clench and tear a little more.

He knew she knew the second she came up to him from behind while he was standing at the doorway or the pantry. But again, he pushed it down, denying everything.

After Ward pulled her into his arms in Fitzsimmons' lab, his heart cracked into two, held together by the thinnest, most delicate strand.

Seeing her drive away from him at the café shattered his heart so it was with great desperation that he told her that she would understand someday. Her rejection just about destroyed whatever was left of him.

The second he found out she called Garrett he wanted to bolt to wherever she was and see for himself that she was alive, in one piece, then pick her up off her feet and crush his mouth to hers like he had always wanted to.

Maybe if he hadn't rejected her all those times before…hadn't denied those feelings before now…but all he was trying to do was protect her. It was all her ever wanted to do.

She was there when he woke up, holding his hand, smiling gently down at him.

"It's great to see you," He whispered through his throbbing headache and she laughed a little, relief flooding her doe like eyes.

"It's great to see you too,"

This woman, who had single-handedly torn apart his world, was helping him build it right back up, making it stronger, better.

And right now, he wouldn't have it any other way.

What do you think? Too mushy?

Thank you thank you thank you THANK YOU to everyone who continues to support me and this story! Regardless of whether you follow, favorite-d , reviewed or just simply read, I appreciate you all! (And don't worry, this isn't the end)