Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

A/N: Juls, thank you so much for betaing. You were quick like lightning, like werewolf speed. Amazing. We love you!

Chapter warning: Annoying Edward. Grrrr. 'Nuff said…

Hostage of Love

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Chapter 6

Moving on

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The Gray Wolf has always played a major character in fairy tales and mythology throughout the ages and all over the world and he has been perceived in many different lights from "Big, Bad Wolf" to spiritual being.

Although Bella knew the text by heart, she read the inscription of the information board out loud to herself. She always did. It wasn't like someone was watching her anyway. For a long time, she hadn't felt safe or unobserved. The first weeks after Rosalie had picked her up in Rio had been really bad. She'd suffered from panic attacks, couldn't stand being in closed rooms, couldn't endure people getting into her personal space much.

Rosalie had saved her life; and although life was extremely difficult dealing with, she was breathing and she had stayed human. For the longest time Bella hated herself, hated what she had put everybody she cared about through. Why had she not been able to see everything for what it was? Why didn't she listen to her best friend, her dad and her conscience? Well, it really was a little too late now. Bella had to look forward and heal herself completely before she could even think about facing the people she was aching to see and touch.

Jacob... she thought with a sudden sting to her heart. She wondered once again what he was doing. Did he love someone else by now? Had he finally forgotten about her? God, she hoped that Jacob would be able to forgive her one day...

Her freezing hands clenched around a cup of steaming coffee. Dressed in her thickest jacket, boots, hat, scarf and fat gloves, Bella sat on a secluded bench at the Anchorage Zoo and watched the wolves. It was her favorite spare time activity since she had left Forks. It gave her peace and soothed the homesickness she was feeling day in and day out.

Today was a cold day, very cold. Her breath puffed out in small, white clouds. Her nose was red and pricked from the cold, but she didn't mind as long as she could watch this pack of wolves.

"Gray wolves are ancestors of domestic dogs and despite the name they actually range in color from brownish-gray, to all black, to all white. Being the largest of all canines, they are social animals that live and hunt in packs of 2-12," the sign said, but she knew that this pack had never seen the wild. Most of them were raised in captivity but she felt fortunate to be able to observe them never the less. Even though, those wolves were considered relatively tame, Bella rather thought of them as unpredictable and dangerous. It was her way to show her respect to this species. Wolves were special to her. Always had been, even before she had learned that Jake could turn into a huge russet wolf…

Bella shoved the memories aside quickly. She came here to watch this pack of wolves. She didn't come to cry over what she had left behind and lost. She was determined to learn how to deal with herself. If she had learned one thing from everything that had happened to her, it was that you were responsible for your actions. There was nobody to blame but you when you messed up. She wanted and needed to grow up to an independent woman, a woman who had her own mind and made decisions for herself. She owed that much to herself.

The typical wolf pack is composed of an Alpha male and his female, they are considered pack leaders, their pups, and several subordinate or juvenile wolves. Wolves are generally monogamous and mated pairs usually remain together for life if one of the wolves does not die.

The Alpha wolf lay on the ground, patiently letting three little cubs crawl over his large frame. His name was Chit. Bella learned that from the sign that informed the Zoo's visitors. When the cubs' play became too rough, the wolf nudged them apart or shook them off his body. The cubs didn't mind, they just continued rough housing and rolling around with no care in the world at all.

Bella smiled, once again remembering Jake and his friends and how they had used to romp around. Quickly, she banished this thought from her mind, again. It was never good letting memories come to the surface. It would make her cry for days and days… every time. It was just so hard to let go, so hard to forget about what she had done to... him.

She knew that she was being ridiculous and that she should just go home - back to Forks, that is - but she simply couldn't. She was too afraid of what would be awaiting her when she returned. No doubt, Charlie would be more than happy if she came to pay him a visit, but she was absolutely embarrassed about her failed marriage, about marrying Edward at all. She should have listened to her parents when they had warned her.

She had bolted from the island with nothing but the clothes she wore and some cash the housekeepers had given her. Calling her father or the pack hadn't been an option. Neither of them would've been able to be there as quick as she needed them to be with her. Out of instinct, she called Rosalie. Although she almost died of mortification, she begged Rosalie to help her, and Rosalie promised she'd come. In the meantime, Bella needed to go and try to hide from Edward by using a fake name at least, not that that would make a real difference, but she had to try.

Bella went one step farther and even cut her hair down to chin length so that he wouldn't be able to find her through people's memories of her. Bella was so relieved when Rosalie and Emmett showed up before Edward did. Rosalie made no secret out of her animosity and her dislike of the choices she had made, by marrying Edward and by her desire to become like them. However, Bella had a feeling that Rosalie would help her regardless, if for nothing else than to prevent her to be turned. Rosalie insisted that she tell her everything of what went down between Edward and herself . Rosalie looked at her first with disbelief and then with utter surprise and shock. "I think our brother went crazy," Bella heard Rosalie tell Emmett with a thoughtful expression on her face.

"I still don't like you and how you mess up everything," Rosalie sneered, turning back to face her. "But no man should treat a woman like that. You're doing right in leaving him." She was furious and more than willing to protect Bella from her brother now. "If he ever puts his hands on you again…" she spat disgusted, her golden eyes blazing with fury. "I'll rip them off and feed them to the dogs." Bella knew that what Edward had done to her made Rosalie think of her past life. She was sorry for that, but she just knew that Rosalie would understand. She was ferociously against any male dominance against woman and would never tolerate it, especially not from a member of her own family. Rosalie sat down and said, "Look..."

The next day, Edward was standing in front of the hotel Bella was hiding out. He had found her although she'd tried so hard to be invisible. She was shocked how easily he'd tracked her down. Once more, it made her aware how inferior she was to him. He only had to follow her scent that she couldn't mask and bang! there he was.

Despite her fear of him, Bella demanded that they had a talk. For once, she wouldn't just run away and hope everything would get better soon and work out on its own. They met the same evening, in a coffeehouse, and with Rosalie and Emmett in tow. She couldn't be alone with him anymore. Who knows what he'd do this time?

At first, Edward seemed to be devastated by her leaving him, but she wasn't fooled by his "godlike" appearance anymore. He pleaded that she might over think her decision and come back to him. He'd never do anything ever again to make her feel frightened, but there was a glint in his eyes that made her doubt he spoke the truth.

Rosalie kept staring at him with disgust. Bella was aware that Edward was reading Rosalie's thoughts. He would know that his sister wouldn't back down and assist her with whatever she needed. Bella then realized that Edward didn't care for his sister's 'thoughts' about him at all. She jumped and almost screamed, terrified when, in reaction to one of Rosalie's thoughts, a hiss escaped him.

In response, Emmett immediately stood in a protective stance in front of Rosalie and warned, "Watch out, bro!"

Edward eyed him arrogantly, but changed his tune right away, turning towards Bella. "I'm sorry, love," he said smoothly. "That was uncalled for."

Bella thought her heart was about to jump out of her chest and sweat broke out all over her body. She tried to control her terror. She didn't want Edward to know the negative effect he had on her. Bella was afraid that it would give him even more power over her, and that terrified her even more. In a clipped voice, she then explained to him how she felt betrayed by his actions, but Edward refused to understand. He argued that he had only done it with best intentions and that he'd never do her any harm. He'd only wanted her to realize how much she loved and needed him. Edward apologized, again.

Did he really mean it? Was he really sorry?

He leaned over the table to take Bella's hand between his hands. She shrank back from him in fear; she didn't trust him anymore.

Rosalie snorted at that point and Emmett actually snarled at Edward. "Are you really that dense, Edward?" he asked and put his arm around Bella in a protective manner. "She's afraid of you. Can't you smell how scared she is right now? It's over. Let it go already. We all warned you from the beginning not to get involved with a human." Turning towards her, Emmett smiled and said, "Sorry, Bella."

Bella nodded, but she felt suffocated by Emmett's arm. She shook him off and sat up straight in her seat. "Edward, I'll file for divorce. After everything that happened I can't be married to you." She looked Edward in the eyes as confidently as she could manage. Inside, she was trembling with nerves.

Rosalie leaned back in her seat, crossed her arms and grinned smugly. She blinked at Bella, encouraging her to go on.

Bella inhaled deeply, mustering up more courage. "This marriage was a huge mistake. I didn't know what I was thinking back then... I want you to stay away from me. Don't come near me ever again. Don't interfere with my life ever again. We're done. Goodbye, Edward." She then turned around and left with Rosalie close on her heels.

On the way to the hotel, Emmett had left to go for a hunt, Rosalie asked, "You didn't consummate the marriage, did you?"

Bella stopped dead in her tracks and blushed crimson. "No." She shook her head.

"It's a pity you can't go for an annulment these days. My brother will never sign the divorce papers." Rosalie ran a hand through her hair. "Annulment," she repeated, emphasizing the word with great relish. "Now that would've really upset Edward." She laughed out once, while Bella trudged after her, feeling completely mortified...

Bella inhaled sharply, willing these memories to go away, once again. She didn't want to think about Edward. At least, she wasn't scared stiff of him anymore, although the images of her 'honeymoon' weren't exactly pleasant either. As long as Edward stayed away from her - and she hadn't seen him in a while now - she could handle those thoughts quite well.

She concentrated on the animals before her, unwilling to let her free afternoon go to waste. It was fun to watch the wolves. It brought her mind to an ease. It soothed her in a way she never fully understood. Seeing those wolves made her feel at home, even when she was far, far away from what she considered home a year ago.

The mother wolf came and sat down next to the Alpha. Luna, Alpha female, Timber wolf, 3 years old, first litter, read the sign that stood before the compound. The cubs now frolicked around her mother, catching each other's tails and pushing each other hard. Luna nudged the Alpha's neck, sliding her muzzle through his thick fur. She then started to chew on her mate's ear. The Alpha grinned wolfishly, and Bella snickered. She could swear that, sometimes, those wolves could look human in a way.

An hour later she got up, stretching her numb body. It was time to return to her tiny flat and to get ready for work. She had to hurry or she would be late again. It would be the third time this month and she didn't know how much longer Mr. Daniel would turn a blind eye on that. Bella gathered her blanket and the thermos and walked to her car, careful not to slip on the snowy ground.

She worked as a Hotel housekeeper, although the Cullens (mostly Alice) didn't approve of her choice of job, saying she could find something better. But truth to be told, Bella simply wanted to be independent as soon as possible and being able to live on her own. Only Rosalie seemed to understand when Bella took the first job that was offered to her.

Bella no longer wanted to accept and depend on any money from the Cullens. How else would she truly become independent and she really wanted to stand on her own. Alice kept trying for several weeks, sending her money and gifts, which Bella had returned every time. Alice finally accepted her decision and Bella was glad about it. She might have a real chance at independence now. She was trying to give it her all, she swore to herself.

When Bella had first seen Alice again, she had been really mad with her and they had their first real fight. Bella was upset and felt betrayed by Alice, too. Alice must have had a vision of Edward lashing out on Bella and then leaving her alone on Isle Esme - why didn't she react?

"But I wanted you to become my sister," Alice argued, almost wailed, looking guilt-stricken. "And I saw you were asking him to change you when he was back. I'm so sorry. Can you forgive me?"

The extent of Alice' selfishness horrified Bella. She wondered if you lost part of your conscience when you became a vampire or if it was just Alice and her bad past. Had the years in the mental institution when she was still human scarred her for life? How could Alice not react or ask for help once she had the vision of Bella changing her mind?

In the end, Bella had forgiven Alice. It just wasn't in her nature to bear grudges, but she didn't allow Alice to decide for her anymore and she demanded that Alice would tell her immediately about any visions that concerned Bella's future.

Bella had decided to stay in Alaska and study there like it was planned. The tuition was already paid for two semesters when she came here. She might as well use it now, it would be a shame to let it go to waste (Esme couldn't agree more). One of the reasons was that Bella couldn't bear it yet to tell her parents yet about her divorce and that she needed to stay in Alaska for a while. That just gave her the perfect alibi until she would work up the courage to spill the beans. Carlisle kept saying that her parents would understand and nobody would be mad or disappointed with her, but Bella was too ashamed to believe him.

Last Christmas, she had lied to her father and told him that she and Edward would be visiting his family in Brazil. Truth was, Edward spent his time in Denali like he did almost the entire time, and Bella was alone in her tiny flat, crying her eyes out, yearning for her parents.

The holiday season was making everything so much worse; the pain and ache she felt in her heart was almost unbearable. She ached more than ever to be near Jake, to see his smile and to feel his warmth. She also wished she could cook Charlie a real nice Holiday meal. One day, she knew she would do this again, she thought sorrowfully.

This year, she had waited on purpose for the last minute to cancel her visit, and today, she was going to call her father and tell him that she couldn't come home for Christmas this year, either. Not something she was really looking forward doing again.

When she was home in her tiny flat, she called sat on her bed to call her father.

"Charlie Swan."

Bella's heart warmed up hearing his voice. "Hi, Dad. It's Bella," she said, feigning a bad cough. "I'm sorry, but I can't come home tomorrow."

"Oh, no, Bella," he answered and she heard his disappointment clearly. "What is it this time?"

After all the excuses she had conjured up over the last several months, the new lie dropped from her lips rather easily. "I have the flu. I need to stay in bed. Carlisle's order."

"I'm sorry to hear that, Bells. I don't know what's keeping you up there all the time that you never come to visit. I barely know how you look like anymore."

"I know, dad. I'm really sorry. I'm really trying to slip in a weekend, but you know how it is… How is everyone?" Bella asked and faked another cough. She wanted to know about Jacob, but she was too scared about what Charlie might tell her if she asked him directly.

"Everyone's quite fine, Bella," her dad answered. "Sue is still here…"

"Oh," Bella breathed surprised. "Sue Clearwater?"

"Uhm, Bells, look… Sue Clearwater and I… We've been seeing each other for a while. I thought you would want to know, alright?" Charlie seemed clearly uncomfortable telling her. "I wanted to tell you when you were here… but, well, you're not coming. So…"

"What? You mean… you and Sue are like together?" she mumbled dumbfounded. "Wow. Congrats. I'm happy for you, Dad."

"Thanks, Bells. Oh, and… Jacob was here picking Leah up," her father said casually, and she felt a lump swell in her throat instantly. "He asked about you."

"Oh, really?" Her heart started to race excitedly, but also a pang of jealousy ran through her. He came to pick up Leah… "What is Leah doing at our house?"

"She dropped Sue…"

Bella wanted to slap herself. It wasn't her business anymore…

"You still aren't on speaking terms with Jake?" Charlie asked.

"No," Bella whispered, coughing again, but this time she coughed away a real sob. God, she missed Jake so much… "How is he, Dad?"

"He's going to graduate in the summer, and he works really hard. He's got a job at Fork's Car Shop."

Jacob and Leah...

Charlie was suddenly quiet for a while and Bella didn't know what to say, either, as she dwelled on thoughts about her time with Jacob.

"Bells, will you come home at all? I haven't seen you in over a year. I really do miss you, kiddo," Charlie asked.

She almost broke and told him everything, but then she held back. She was too ashamed to tell him that her marriage had failed. "I'll be home soon, Dad," she promised. "Real soon!"

After exchanging a couple more words for a while, they ended the call and Bella threw her phone onto her bed. She felt so bad for all the lies she was telling her parents and friends. That wasn't her. She really should gather her wits and just tell her mom, her dad… Jacob.

Jacob.

Bella realized it was time to come clean, at least with Jake for now. She wanted him to know first. She quickly glanced at the clock. She had another hour before she had to start working. This would give her enough time to compose a letter to Jake. After all those sleepless nights and the discussions she had with him in her thoughts, the words came really easy and really fast.

Dear Jake.

You haven't heard from me in a while and you must be thinking that I'm changed by now. I'm sorry for everything. I regret so much... mostly I regret being so stubborn and marrying Edward at all.

I have been struggling with myself for so long now, but I believe you deserve to know. And I wanted to let you know first, before I'm going to tell my parents. You were right all along. Edward and I aren't meant for each other. You'll be happy to hear that I filed for divorce and I have been on my own for a long time now. I could never come up with the courage of telling you before. I don't even know if you still care to know but it is important for me to let you know.

Unfortunately, Edward hasn't signed the paper yet, which is really annoying, but not the end of the world. The divorce will be absolute as soon as two years are over from when I filed the divorce.

I'm still alive, Jake. I changed my mind about becoming a vampire. It's not what I want anymore, and I am ashamed of myself of what I put everyone through. It's a long story that I'm going to tell you one day – if you still want to know, if you still want to see me.

I'm at college now, studying to become a physiotherapist. I really love it and although it's quite tough at some times, I can help people and that is what I want. I'm going to move to Florida though, live with my mom again. I will transfer there and continue my education. If everything turns out like I planned I can get my degree in about two more years.

I hear you're with Leah now. I'm very happy for you, Jake. I always wanted you to be happy.

If you can forgive me for everything I did to you, call me…

Bella.

Bella closed up the letter quickly without reading it over. She put the letter in an envelope, put a stamp on it and scribbled Jake's address on it. Then she quickly dressed for work, took the letter and ran to her car, arriving at the hotel just in time. After work, she quickly threw the letter into the mailbox and drove home, totally exhausted from the long day.

What she did not know was that the letter never reached Jake. In fact, it simply got lost somewhere along the way. If she only knew!

Bella spent the Christmas Eve alone. She didn't want to play happy family with the Cullens. It was always the same sterile atmosphere; it made her miss her mom and dad so much it hurt. It wasn't fun to have a fancy Christmas dinner when you had to eat it all alone while six people were watching you. It also was awkward to receive presents from them, while you were divorcing their son and brother. Her visits became less and less anyway, and that was how she preferred it. She needed to completely cut her ties with the Cullens even though she felt Carlisle and Esme really cared about her and wanted to keep her in their 'lives'. Alice had accepted that Bella needed to have her own life, away from their world. Bella had a much better chance at a real life without them.

She was watching TV and munching on a microwave dinner when the doorbell rang. Bella got up and peered through the fish eye. The figure standing out there was familiar, but nobody that she actually needed to see. She opened the door the slightest crack and asked, "Edward, what do you want?"

"Merry Christmas to you, too, Bella. Nice to see you. Can I come in?" He leaned against the door frame with his legs crossed.

"Why would I let you come in?" Bella cringed at the thought and rolled her eyes. The nerve!Her phone began to vibrate and jingle, but Bella ignored it. What did Edward want?

He smiled at her, mockingly, and said, raising his voice a little, "If you prefer your neighbors to hear what I have to say… you're welcome."

"Five minutes, Edward," she hissed and opened the door to let him in. He entered and strolled across her tiny hallway into the room where she was living and sleeping. She didn't want him here. A shudder ran down her spine and she backed against a wall instinctively.

"I won't need much time, Bella. …" he said and looked around, curious about how she lived. He made a face when he discovered Jacob's gift, her dream catcher, hanging from her bedpost. It was the only thing she had asked her father to send after her. His eyes fell on the framed pictures on her wall from the wolves from the zoo. He frowned and asked snidely, "Really, Bella? How old are you again?"

"A lot younger than you are, Edward," she replied, crossing her arms over her chest defensively. "What do you want? I told you to stay away from me."

He leaned forward and stated, "I think we should try again."

Bella gasped and shook her head. "No," she blurted out, suddenly feeling queasy. The feeling increased when he closed the distance between them with two quick strides. Her eyes anxiously flitted between him and the door, and she regretted instantly that she let him in. Her cell still jingled. Whoever was calling, it would have to wait.

"I think that you still love me, Bella." His eyes locked with hers, holding her in place. "You still want me, but you're too stubborn to admit it."

Bella inhaled deeply, clenching her hands tightly while trying to calm down her frantically beating heart. "I don't want you anymore," she choked out, unwittingly repeating what he had told her when he had left her.

He winced, visibly, but replied in a calm voice, "I don't believe you, love."

"Don't call me that." An emotional turmoil broke loose inside her. She still loved Edward, there was no denying that, but she didn't see him in the same overly perfect light anymore. She knew his flaws now and his manipulating ways. She couldn't-

She looked up to him. His golden eyes pulled her in... Suddenly it was hard to remember what they were talking about. Her phone started to vibrate again. Why did it keep ringing?

His voice interrupted her trail of thoughts. "You are my love. I love you, Bella. I can't lose you," he begged. His voice was so soft. Yes, she could believe him. He loved her.

Bella shook her head, trying to clear her foggy brain. "You've lost me already. You can't treat me like that and expect I forgive you," she said, tentatively first, but then her voice became stronger. "You hurt me purposely. You locked me in and left me to fend on my own. You knew what it would do to me and you still left me alone. I was scared because of you."

"I had plenty of time thinking about everything, about my feelings and why I kept letting you and your family control my life. I will no longer have it, Edward. You need to let me go and leave me be, living my human life. I want to stay human and grow old. I want to have children one day-" She held her breath as this sudden thought deeply took a hold of her.

His hand came up to rest upon her cheek. Bella shuddered from the cold. Angrily, she pushed his hand away and stepped aside, wanting to get out of his proximity. "I can't be with you anymore, Edward."

In one quick motion, he grabbed her by her hip with the other hand, effectively stopping her from moving. "You know how it is, Bella. The first fight between husband and wife... and then nobody wants to give in..." he murmured, letting his breath fan over her face, hoping that it still would affect her. After all, she only was human and he was a vampire... "And you run away, wanting to divorce me... See, I don't want to be awkward, love. I'm giving you another chance. You don't even need to apologize... You only need to come back to me."

Yes.Everything would be okay when she returned to him. Edward would take care of her, make sure that nothing bad ever happened to h- "Stop that," she whispered, realizing that he was luring her in. "What happened, Edward? Why are you doing this?"

He smiled and cocked an eyebrow, while leaning closer.

"Oh," she breathed, realizing that he'd done it right from the start. He was a predator by nature; she was prey... Her legs were wobbly, her head felt so light, everything was fuzzy.

Enough!

No More!

"Stop it," she said hoarsely as if awakening from a long sleep.

Jacob's face appeared before her inner eyes and it was as if she could draw strength from him. She spoke stronger and more forcefully, "Get. Away. From. Me."

Edward grimaced, frustration evident on his face, and stepped back abruptly. "How come you never even told anyone?" he asked angrily. "No one knows that you ran away from me. Not even your parents. How am I supposed to believe that you really want to have a divorce? I would have thought you would've at least told Charlie by now. And your mom, Bella? How do I suppose to take you seriously?" He came close to her face yet again, his lips almost brushing over her skin.

Anger flared up in Bella. She couldn't believe how disrespectful he was about her. Determined to put a stop to this once and for all she yelled, "Get out of my face!" and pushed him backwards with all her strength.

He didn't budge; he only smirked at her.

With that Bella lost it. She pulled her right arm back and punched him in the face. Punching him was like hitting a thick wall of solid ice. A sharp pain shot up her arm, but damn if she would show it. "I'm so done with you!" she cried out. "And just so you know, Edward, I told Jake. I told him everything." Bella cradled her arm, which quickly became numb and started to swell up. "You better leave now or I'll call Rose."

"Very well, Bella," Edward snarled. "I can't wait for you to crawl back to me once the Volturi show up."

That was low. She glowered at him. "I can take care of myself. I don't need and want you anymore; I only hope that I have to never see you again."

"We'll see," he said, and before she could blink an eye, he was gone.

"Only in your dreams," Bella hissed, suddenly feeling totally overwhelmed by what just had taken place. On unsteady legs, she ran to the front door and yelled, "I fucking hate you, Edward Cullen!" She didn't care if Edward was still here to hear or if her neighbors would know. It was freeing to cry out her fury. She slammed the door shut, locked it - twice - and stumbled into her tiny bathroom to run cold water over her hand. "Ouch" she exclaimed, "I hope it is not broken".

Her phone jingled again. Who was calling her this insistently? She wrapped a towel around her arm and walked back into the other room, fishing her phone from the sofa. Alice! Bella pressed the answer-button, holding the phone to her ear with her good hand.

"Bella, are you alright?" Alice yelled. "We're on our way already. I didn't know he was going to see you. Edward must have decided on the spur of the moment..." Alice sounded really upset.

"I'm okay, Alice," Bella answered quietly, but her stomach lurched. "He's gone now."

Alice let out a relieved breath, and Bella could hear her flooring her car.

"You don't need to come here, Alice," Bella said. "I'm alright. You've got better things to do than babysitting me on Christmas Eve." She heard Rosalie laugh out sarcastically. She also might have said something like 'fucking idiot', 'control issues' and 'kick his ass'. But she wasn't sure. Her hearing was only human after all.

"He mentioned the Volturi coming after me. You're going to tell me if they come, aren't you?"

"I promised. Yes, I'll tell you. You don't need to worry. They haven't made the decision yet. They believe you're still on your honeymoon. Carlisle sent them a letter, reporting about your wedding and included wedding pictures. You should be safe right now. You should be safe for a while, I hope. Time doesn't mean the same to them like it does to a human."

"Fine," Bella said monotonously. She felt detached from her body somehow. "Listen, I'm really tired. Go home. I'll talk to you later." She snapped the phone closed and went back into her bathroom. Her head started to ache, her hand throbbed painfully. She wrapped ice around it, took some pain killers and went to bed.

Despite being totally exhausted, physically and mentally, she had never felt this strong in her life before. She fought for herself; she stood her ground. Actually, Bella felt a hint of pride with herself. There was lightness around her heart… like a small ray of light, she was starting to believe she would be able to live a life she needed and wanted – without Edward and the Cullens around.

Bella fell asleep with a small smile on her face, dreaming of sunny days and bright smiles...

Bella desperately waited for an answer to her letter, but it never came. The first three or four weeks, she practically sprinted to her mailbox whenever she came home from college or work, but she always found it empty.

Every so often, she held the phone in her hand, contemplating if she should give Jake a call. She shied away every time. What if he hung up on her? What if he told her to leave her alone? Or worse, what if Leah would answer his phone, telling her to go to hell?

Bella knew she loved Jake just as much as the day she realized that she was in love with him at all, but it was only wishful thinking that there could be any kind of future with him. She had missed her opportunity; she hurt Jake and he deserved better. He didn't want her that way. He didn't even want her as a friend anymore or he would have answered the letter, wouldn't he?

She had a very strong feeling that she might have lost Jacob for good. Her emotions got the better of her. She hadn't cried that hard for a long time. She felt so raw, so stripped, she could barely breathe. She holed up in her flat for another week. It hurt knowing that her attempt at making up with Jake had failed. It hurt a lot, although she had known deep in her heart that she'd lost Jacob the moment she'd left him after the battle. She'd always only pushed him away. Why should he answer to her letter?

By time February came, Bella had gotten her act together and finally decided to tell Charlie about her break-up.

First, Charlie had been real quiet and then he just let go. She had never heard Charlie that angry before. "I knew he was not good for you, Bella, and, why the hell, haven't you told me?" he shouted into the phone. "Why did you wait so long? I would have really wanted to know that my daughter is having a difficult time in her life," he ranted.

It took her quite a bit of time convincing Charlie that she simply needed to deal with this on her own first, that she needed to learn how to depend on herself and grow up.

Charlie never had been the emotional type. His outburst told Bella how much he cared for her and how much he had suffered during the last months by being cut out of her life. After his rant, he had calmed down and told her that he was so proud of her. But he had insisted that she needed to come see him - sooner rather than later now. He sounded pretty giddy all of a sudden, which made her smile and then she missed Charlie more than ever.

The week after the call to Charlie she packed up her stuff and transferred to Florida, ready to start a new chapter in her life.

She needed more time to heal and to figure out her life.

Bella got settled in Florida, got accustomed to the new people and put all her energy into her studies.

When she discovered her college was offering courses in self-defense for women, she signed up on the spur of the moment, remembering how good it felt being able to fight for yourself. The classes really were good for her.

The training did not only help her gain control over her body, it also helped her growing in confidence. The Volturi-threat somehow still looming over her, she wanted to be prepared. She knew with no doubt, it was utterly senseless to fight a vampire as a human, but she was determined not to go down at least trying.

Two times, she convinced Charlie to come down to Florida to see her instead of travelling to Forks. She simply could not bring herself to go to La Push at the moment. Charlie understood, but he insisted she couldn't hide forever; she eventually would have to face the people she had left behind.

Bella knew that he actually meant Jacob when he said people, but it was like a tacit agreement not to mention Jacob or anything that involved him. It still was a tender subject for Bella, and Charlie just… understood.

And suddenly, another year was almost over and she faced the third Christmas season since she left Forks.

Charlie was adamant she came over to visit. He was too busy to leave, and he would be working at the holidays, too, but he desperately wanted to see her. Could she really deny him that? He missed her so much.

Bella accepted Charlie's invitation after two nights of contemplating. She wanted to see Jacob again. She wanted to talk things out with him, hoping she could make her aments. She wanted Jacob back in her life, needed to be let back in his. She still missed him terribly. She wasn't sure if she would be strong enough if he would reject her, but simply couldn't stay away from him anymore.

Somehow, it felt as if…

…it was time to go home.

A/N: Guys, thank you for sticking around and reading our tale. I am so sorry for soooo much Edward in this chapter, it was very painful for us, trust me! We thought Bella needed to make this decision now to free herself from her vamp husband and really heal and commit to a new and independent life, and hopefully find her way HOME again where she belongs.