Manflu
This chapter has been prompted by Bella with the request -Ziggy Roscoe has always been one for dramatics, and when he's ill it's no different. His gruelling demands rub everyone up the wrong way, though the Roscoe's are always good at revenge
"Oh no love, you don't have to do that. I'll make you some tea, it'll clear you right up," Sandy said softly, ushering Ziggy back on to the sofa he had been sprawling on for most of the day.
"Are you sure mum?" the mechanic asked, looking to the blonde to reconfirm that she was okay with making him tea, though before he could say anymore, he was cut off by a huge cough, it so loud it echoed through the whole house and made Ziggy's chest ache.
"Of course I am darling," Sandy soothed, stroking a hand through her son's clammy hair. "God you're burning up."
"No, I'm fine honestly," Ziggy tried to protest, moving to sit up though he was stopped by the older woman. "I could probably go down to the garage with the boys, we're bogged under enough as it is."
"You are not going anywhere mister, nuh-huh."
"Well... if you insist," Ziggy said after a moment, sinking back into the sofa and wrapping the duvet that had been kicked down, tightly around him, revelling in the utter comfort that it gave him. "A cup of tea would be fantastic."
"Coming right up love," Sandy with a smile, standing and making her way to the kitchen.
"Oh and mum?" Ziggy yelled over his shoulder. "A chocolate biscuit would really do the trick. One of those fancy ones you got from the market yeah?" As he listened to Sandy bustling about in the kitchen, Ziggy couldn't help but smile. A few days of pampering would do just the trick and if Ziggy had to fake being sick to get it, well, then so be it, after all, who would ever know?
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"Would you two quieten it down a little bit," Sandy demanded as Joe and Lindsey entered the house a few hours later, their laughter loud and joyous after one too many glasses of wine at the Dog. "You're being loud enough to wake the dead."
"And by that she means Ziggy," Robbie drawled as he and Jason exchanged an annoyed look from the kitchen doorway.
"It's 8 in the evening, what's Ziggy doing sleeping now?"
"Your brother's feeling a bit under the weather, he needs to rest up and that can't happen if the place isn't quiet."
"So why doesn't he just go up to bed?" Lindsey couldn't help but ask, the look on the twin's faces showing that this was an issue that had been gone over one too many times already.
"With that horrid draught? No, that'll just make it worse for him! Ziggy needs to stay somewhere warm, it'll help him get better."
"Oh joy," Robbie sighed under his breath. After 18 years he knew exactly what Sandy was like when she had an ill son to look after. These next few days no-one would be able to breath without Sandy telling them off for being too loud and inconsiderate, in other words, it was going to be hell, pure hell.
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Robbie's suspicions were confirmed almost instantly, though surprisingly it wasn't Sandy who was making the whole thing unbearable, but in fact Ziggy himself. In less than twelve hours he had been so demanding, so fussy and so stubborn, Robbie was ready to tear out his own hair, and the teen was pretty certain the others were sharing similar sentiments.
Ziggy refused to even leave the sofa, claiming bad head-rush everytime he tried to move. This meant that the others were waiting on him hand and foot which was bad enough on its own, but the mechanic was so goddamn demanding. Robbie would have just sat down after making yet another cup of tea for his older brother, before having to go and get him a jumper, or an ice pack, or another pillow, and the others were also being treated to similar demands.
"I'm telling you Jase," he found himself moaning to his twin the next day as they made their way down the garden path, shopping bags in hand, yet another task they'd been chored with in the past 24 hours.
As their final summer holiday, and at four months long, it should have been the best time of their lives, instead the youngest Roscoe's were being used as slaves by the rest of their family, and it was growing old quite quickly. No scratch that, Robbie was ready to kill someone, and that someone was more likely to be Ziggy than anyone else.
"Ziggy is getting ridiculous. He got mum to make us go to the shop so we could get him some camomile tea. He doesn't even like this shit."
"Because you expected something different from him? Zig is the biggest drama queen going, and it only increases when he gets the flu, it's only a matter of time before he starts lamenting on about how he's going to die in the next week or so."
"I'm surprised he hasn't done that already," Robbie said with a roll of his eyes, opening the back door, frowning in confusion at the loud music that was booming throughout the whole house. What he saw next though, well it was something he couldn't quite believe.
Because Ziggy, the man who had been too weak to even go to the kitchen to make himself a sandwich, and instead had been living on Sandy's secret recipe and totally amazing chicken soup whilst the rest of the family had been having to choke down her vile lasagne and slimy chicken pie, was currently dancing – rather energetically at that – around the living room without a care in the world.
"Of course he may not be worrying about his mortality because there's nothing actually wrong with him," Robbie muttered, unable to tone down his glare as Ziggy jumped onto the table and started playing air guitar.
"That git," Jason said, unable to believe they had all been so blind and had actually fallen for Ziggy's lies. "What are we going to do about this? We can't let Zig get away with it."
"No, and we're not going to," Robbie said, already thinking. "Come on, lets get the others, we need to tell them what he's been up to. He's not getting away with treating us like mugs."
So, without Ziggy even noticing, Jason and Robbie backed out of the kitchen and made their way to the garage, determined to get their revenge.
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"Oh I can't believe him," Joe said, eyes wide as Jason and Robbie finished telling him and Freddie what they had just seen. "That little scroat, we've been running around like headless chickens after him, when this has all just been a massive trick."
"Mum is going to flip when she finds out, when she's through with him Zig really won't be able to get off that sofa," Robbie said with a scowl. He opened his mouth, ready to say more, though he quietened as he saw Leela walking through the Dog car park, clutching a basket of treats in her hand, no doubt all for Ziggy. "Oh look what we've got here boys, another sap to wait on our darling brother hand and foot."
Overhearing Robbie's dry comment, Leela found herself unable to stop from pausing and turning to face the garage, where four of the five brothers were currently sat. "Are you talking to me?"
"Nah, we're just-"
"Depends if that's for Zig or not," Robbie cut in over Freddie, not backing down at the glare he was shot by his brothers.
"Yeah, yeah they are actually," Leela said, her voice cold as she made her way up to the garage door. "A bit of sugar is just what Ziggy needs to give him back some of his energy."
"He has plenty of energy by the looks of it," Jason muttered, not saying anything when Leela shot him a questioning look.
"And what's that meant to mean?"
"Ziggy ain't ill, he's been putting it on for the past week."
"Look I know he's been a bit demanding-"
"Hah!" Robbie couldn't help but snark, falling silent when Joe gave him a sharp dig in the ribs.
"Anyway, Ziggy has been a bit too much but he's not going to lie about it. He's been feeling rotten is all, wanting a bit of tlc isn't exactly a crime."
"Yeah but the amount of Storage Hunters we've had to watch bloody well is."
"Me and Rob saw him," Jason cut in before his twin could agitate Leela any further. "For a guy who's claiming he doesn't have the energy to even get off the sofa to make his own cup of tea, he was certainly pulling some interesting moves when he thought he were home alone."
"Are you pulling my leg?" Leela asked, raising her eyebrows in disbelief.
"Fraid not," Joe grimaced. "Zig's been playing us all for the fool."
"Looks like he needs to get a taste of his own medicine then," Leela said after a second, a devilish smirk gracing her lips. "And I have the best idea."
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"Watch it Fred!" Ziggy shrieked, kicking the bathroom door shut in Freddie's face, pulling his boxer shorts up in a rush and double checking that everything was hidden before re-opening the door, glaring at the amused look on his brother's face. "Yes?"
"Your beloved Leela is here and she's not looking best pleased," the mechanic's words stopped Ziggy in his tracks as he went to grab a pair of jeans.
"What? Did she say why?"
"She's not saying much mate, just that she wants to see you and it better be now or there's going to be hell to pay."
"What? But... but I haven't done nothing," Ziggy said, eyes wide as he tried to think of any reason as to why his girlfriend was seemingly so pissed off with him. "At least I don't think I have, you do-"
"Fred have you found Ziggy yet?" Robbie yelled, running up the stairs and almost passing by the bathroom in his haste. "What are you muppets doing up here, having a jolly little picnic? Leela's doing her nut in outside, she looks ready to start putting bricks through the bloody windows! You need to talk to her Zig, get her to calm down."
"I don't even know what I'm supposed to have done though!"
"Well you better get thinking mate," Robbie said as he and Freddie manhandled their brother down the stairs, not caring for his protests, or his lack of clothing. "She was screeching about something happening in the loft the other week. If this is cause you've got with another bird, Leela's going to have your guts for garters."
"No I haven't! I wouldn't do that to her," Ziggy protested, though the week before had been a messy one. There were blanks in his memory even now, and if Ziggy had ended up cheating on Leela, well he really was none the wiser.
"Well go on then, you better get talking to her because mum is going to flip if Leela gets the neighbours complaining, especially Mrs Merrs, she hates us enough as it is."
"All right, I'm going, I'm going!" Ziggy cried, finally making his way to the front door of his own accord and no longer caring for his state of undress. That mentality lasted a good five seconds before Ziggy heard the slam of the front door as his brothers locked him out and he came face to face with a smirking blonde firefighter, hose clenched tightly in her hands.
"Leela?" Ziggy found himself asking, eyes never moving away from the hose nozzle. "What's this about?"
"Well the others were telling me just how awful you're feeling today, that you're hot and covered in a cold sweat, and well I just thought I had to do my bit to make sure you made the quickest recovery possible, to get you fighting fit again."
"Oh no love, you don't have to do that I'm – ahhh!Jesus that's bloody freezing!" Ziggy found himself shrieking as Leela turned the hose onto full blast, soaking him in seconds. "What the hell was that for?" He cried out when the hose had been turned off, turning to glare at the laughing member of his family, noting with annoyance that both Jason and Lindsey had their phones out, recording the whole thing.
"And if you claim you've got hypothermia from this whole sorry thing we're actually going to kill you," Joe promised with a sly smirk, unable to hold in his laughter Ziggy could only splutter in shock.
Maybe pulling the wool over his family's eyes hadn't been his best idea, after all they were Roscoes, and if anyone was going to be able to smell a rat, it would be them. Ziggy didn't even know why he bothered.
Thank you all for your continued patience with me! I just hope I can get back to updating regularly again!
Next Chapter -Robbie suffers from a seizure and is later diagnosed but what caused it? - prompted by rhea sutton and guest