25, Cocktober 2015 12:00 PM:
Generic: GAWSH MUM, WHY MUST YOU MAKE SUCH A RUKUS IN THE KITCHEN!
Generic's Mother: IM MAKING YOUR FUCKING SANDWICH YOU LIL' SHIT!
Generic had been sitting at his desk playing with his jacks and pebbles from outside.
Random cars were passing by, shaking the house with each passing.
Generic: OY! Wish I lived in a better house...wish I had bettah bandwidth too.
Just then, the local Carrier Pidgeon, Carl, came with a steam message in his beak.
Generic: OUY! GIMMIE THAT!
Generic looked at the message from DMP.
Generic: HOY! DEE-EM-PEE says he's the illuminarty
Generic's Mother: STOP YELLING YOU FAT SACK OF BAWLS!
Generic: MUM WE MUST GET OUT OF THIS PLACE OR THE ILLUMINARDY IS GONNA CUM!
But just then, a large SUV came swerving into the kitchen, trapping Generics mom in between a wall and the SUV.
Generic: NO! MY MUM!
Generic's Mother: Im going to die...i must tell you something before I pass.
Generic: wuh-whut is it mum?
Generic's Mother: Fuh-fuh-fuck youuu your adopted.
Generic's mother then died.
But before generic could greave at the loss, the people in the SUV began to open fire at Generic.
Generic fell to the ground lookin' like Swiss cheese.
Driver: alright, The Generic Gamer is down.
The driver then stepped out of the car. He was green and looked like an alien.
The green man walked over to Generic's corpse.
Green Man: Beam him up.
All of a sudden a beam of light came down from the sky and Generic's dead body began to rise up into the sky.
Then, once Generic was out of sight, the beam disappeared.
The alien got back in the car and drove off.