Well, here is the official first chapter. I hope you all enjoy it. I sure enjoyed writing it :]
Disclaimer: I do not own Young Justice.
~MKK
Chapter 1
Kid Flash POV
I finally left the cold blank room that I had confined myself to for the past couple of days. Aqualad finally convinced me to get up and live rather than starve myself to death watching over Robin. It wasn't the fact that I was literally starving to death that made me want leave from my spot, but it was the fact that Aqualad told me that I wouldn't be able to see Robin wake up if I died of starvation. So I decided to get up and walk around aimlessly.
I wasn't even hungry, which was a surprise even to me, because if I was anything at all, I was that one person that is always hungry. I laughed darkly to myself as I recalled a memory of me and Robin together eating at our favorite fast food restaurant. I let go of a breath that I didn't realize I was holding. I knew that I couldn't always dwell on my thoughts towards him, but I couldn't help it when he was the only thing on my mind. I felt all the pain that was stuck onto me for the past three days that have gone by since the accident, and the fact that he is in a coma disturbed me so much that I could just collapse and die of guilt. But I knew that I wouldn't be able to do that. The team wouldn't let me die of guilt, and I wouldn't let myself either. Because I know that I have no right to do so because I know that it is all my fault. I don't deserve to die peacefully after what I had done.
I felt a shiver run up my back at the thought of what I had done. I wish that this could have all been some sort of twisted dream and that none of the recent events have actually happened. Any minute now I would wake up and Dick would be there laughing at me saying how much of a baby I was. One minute… Two Minutes… Five minutes… I knew it, it wasn't a dream. This is a cruel nightmare of reality hitting me so hard I could just die. But I can't, not now, not ever. I wasn't deserving of a silent death. Not me…
-0-
I wasn't keeping track of time. I didn't realized I was standing in that hallway for two hours until I heard fast footsteps running towards me. I slowly turned only to see Miss Martian with a tear stained face. I was about to ask why she was crying, but she blurted out something before I would even open my mouth. I wasn't really paying attention, but the only words I heard were "Robin" and Awake".
No…I couldn't be. Even Batman had said that he wouldn't be awake for another couple of days at least. I wanted to go and run over as fast as I could, but I knew that I wasn't wanted. I knew that Robin was going to hate me and never look at me again. I didn't want to have to face the pure horror of my only true friend looking at me with hatred and betrayal. I just couldn't.
"Megan… I know, but please, just leave me alone." My own voice sounded so alien to me. How ironic; I am talking to an alien from mars and I don't even understand my own tone. I didn't want to go back to that quiet, blank room with the disturbing rhythmic sound of beeping ringing in my ears. I didn't want to be there when he was lying there; legs unmoving. I felt her grab my shoulder tightly.
"He is asking for you. We almost had to sedate him from going into hysterics. I know that I am still not a knowledgeable on human customs, but I know enough to understand that he really needs you there for him right now." He sounded sincere but grim. Two complete opposites that never sounded right now suddenly mad total sense to me. "I know how much of a friend Robin is to you, but do not forget that you are a close friend to him as well. So please go and see him. If you can't, I understand, but please… Just go to him."
I sigh and look up. I didn't realize how long it was that I was looking at the floor for, but I know that I can't hide from reality forever. "…Okay." I knew that I was probably going to get a bird-a-rang into my eye the second I walked into the doors, but if it makes Robin feel any better, then I will do it. Megan gives me a quick nod, then leads me toward the hospital wing.
-0-
The closer we walked, the more my feet began to drag. I didn't even bother using my Meta abilities to reach him. I was scared of what was going to happen. I didn't want to see him and have to face the rejection my friendship, but I also felt guilty about what I had done to him; or rather what it was that I had not done. We were only a corridor away from the place that Robin supposedly is lying awake and waiting.
I could hear the rough and husky voice of Batman inside of the room. If I wasn't afraid before, I am now. I know what it is robin can do even if he is paral- no, unable to move, but I am also aware of what it is that his mentor can do as well. I didn't want to have to face two angry people off trying to kill me.
Even if by some miracle it was that Robin and Batman weren't mad at me, I would probably die of guilt and sadness of the fact that everything was all my fault. I just with that I could turn back time and change what it is that happened.
Then I realized it. I don't want Robin to forgive me. I know now. I wanted him to hate me; I wanted him to hate me so that I could die by his hands rather than living with the guilt of his permanent condition. I just hope that he will be able to keep them and not have to amputate them. If they did, then I would probably do the same to myself then be able to walk with my own. I would rather be in the same situation as him than live in ignorance and bliss while he walked the path of hurt and sorrow. Or rather not be able to walk.
I was probably going to regret this. No I wasn't. I was going to face my responsibility of hurting my best friend and carry all the guilt if I have to.
I lifted my hands shakily and put my hands against the door handle. I could feel the coolness of the metal biting into my skin. But the feeling wasn't blissful. No, it was bitter and hollow. I try to grab all of the confidence I still had and pushed open the doors.
Please Review. I will post about once every two weeks, or even after three days. But I will try to update as soon as possible.