June

FABIAN'S POV

I'm so conflicted.

For the past few months, it seemed like everything was going smoothly. Nina is back, and we've been dating again. KT is extremely understanding and cool with it, and we've grown to be extremely close friends, which almost makes Nina jealous. No matter who I hang out with, someone is upset. I'm starting to wonder if Nina will always be the jealous type, angry if I have other girl friends. But, c'mon! She would hang out with Alfie and Eddie and the others during her time here - she was dating me! What did I have to be worried about! Yeah, nothing. She trusted me, and I trust her. Why is she worried?

All in all, everything was just going smoothly for quite some time. The whole Set epidemic is over, so for the first time since I began high-school, I can focus on just school and friends like a normal teenager - no life threatening drama.

But now, well, now everything is different. I can't focus on school and friends because I'm so torn in this girlfriend issue. I loved Nina, but I'm wondering if that is in the past. Have I moved onto KT? My relationship with KT suffered through much more, but we managed to stay together throughout it all. In some matter, I do miss her. Should the fact that I'm even questioning my relationship with Nina be a sign I should go back to KT? I'm wondering if Nina was supposed to be a past. But what if KT has already moved on? I mean, we've talked and hung out since, and she doesn't seem affected or offended by the situation whatsoever. And Nina is jealous. I'm frankly annoyed by it. But there is of course one thing I believe I am now sure of:

I miss KT.

I miss her smile, the laughs we shared as a couple, her soothing touch, the strokes of her hand on my back to comfort me when I was in distress. I miss her soft hair, her smooth caramel skin, her warm, loving eyes.

Nina never even occurred to me once throughout my relationship with KT.

With graduation around the corner, and a possible threat as mentioned to me by Eddie, I want to have this figured out. I want to know the path I'm going to continue on. I refuse to graduate with the wrong girl wrapped around my finger. I was hoping for an easy end to my schooling, no ancient Egyptian curses, no girl drama, nothing. But I guess that was too much to ask for.

I lie down on my bed, pondering my thoughts when Nina bursts through the door. Her smile that used to brighten my day and send a tingle down my spine looks to be what it is - a smile. It has no meaning anymore.

"Fabian!" she exclaims. She sits beside me on the bed and throws her arms around my neck. I am tempted to scoot away, but realize what that might result in - a talk. A long talk.

I'm not ready for that.

"Fabes, guess what! I got into Oxford! Can you believe it? A college in England! I'll be close to you even after we graduate," she squeals breathlessly.

And there it is. The true deciding factor as to if I should choose KT or Nina. The reaction I get when she tells me she will be attending college near me.

I choose KT.

"Nina," I stammer. "I-I just don't think… I mean… for some reason, this-it doesn't have the same effect it would've had on me two years ago. This whole news about college, for some reason, it doesn't resonate with me correctly."

"What do you mean?" she asks, her expression tight and putrid, as if all the happiness is rotting away.

"I just mean… look, two years ago, if you had told me that, I would have been elated. I would've spun you around and kissed you. But now, this bothers me, the fact that you'll be close to me. I just don't want that anymore. We aren't right for each other, Nina. We've broken up twice. I hardly missed you after you were gone. I… I'm still in love with KT."

How I managed to get that out is a mystery. I guess it's because I don't still have the feelings I did. When I broke up with her two years ago, it was hard, shattering. I still had feelings for her. Now, the speech is painless.

Nina begins to tear up. Her eyes cloud with steaming tears of rage. This is exactly why I wished to break up with her in the first place. She is overreacting, getting angry at the truth. Truth hurts, Nina. Learn that, then respect it.

"I HATE YOU!" she screams. She runs out of my room and slams the door.

Seconds later, the door swings open again, revealing a worrisome looking KT. She gazes at me with glassy eyes and a faint smile.

"Did… did you hear all that?" I ask.

"I want to say no, out of respect for you, but I'd be lying," she says solemnly. "I'm sorry."

We stare at each other in silence for a moment. I am the first to break it.

"C'mere," I mumble. KT shuffles her feet to me, then breaks into a run. She flings herself on top of me.

"I missed you," I say. "Nina just… she showed up out of nowhere. It caught me off guard. I'm meant to be with you."

She interrupts me with a brief peck on my lips, then dives in for a full-fledged kiss.

"I'm still in love with you," KT says, referring back to my conversation with Nina. I smile, then pull her towards me, kissing her deeply.

"I'm sorry about Nina," I say apologetically. "I'm sorry I let old feelings get in the way, feelings that are dead to me. I'm sorry I took so long to realize my feelings for you. I'm sorry I ever ended us. I love you."

"I love you," she says, then dives in for another kiss.