This chapter deals with cheating, and preterm labor.
RyderPOV-
''This is always the busiest day,'' Abigail reminds me.
It's the day after Christmas, and people are making exchanges and returns.
Yesterday was awesome. The Anderson-Hummels, Blaine's mother, Cooper and Danielle and their son, the Hummels, the Mottas, and my family, along with Sugar, Rory, Blair and I all managed to squeeze into Kurt and Blaine's apartment.
It was loud and hectic, and having four toddlers together might not have been the best idea…
But it was family.
Blair and I got a lot of things for baby Noah or Jasmine. And she looks so happy now, practically glowing, at twenty-four weeks pregnant.
''Finally,'' Abigail groans as we stack the last CD, ''Although I have to admit. I'd rather do this than work the counter.''
Rory ha the day off to go with Sugar to a doctor's appointment or birthing class or something, so it's just Penny, Jack, Abigail and I.
''I know how you feel,'' I agree, moving to pick up the next case, ''I'm working over time on breaks to help pay for the baby.''
Blair and I need all of the help that we can get.
An hour later, when Abigail and I are straightening the cutout of the artist whose CD is our best seller, the store has quiet down a bit.
The phone rings, and Penny picks it up with a tired expression.
''Hello, Songbirds, Penny speaking. How may I help you,'' she asks, feigning interest ,''Wait, slow down. I can't understand you.'
She listens for a few more seconds before looking up at me with wide eyes.
''Yeah. Okay. Thank you, I'll tell him.''
She hangs up quickly, whispering into Jack's ear before running to me.
''Get your coat, Ryder, I need you to go with me,'' Penny rushes out of the coat room with our jackets, and her keys.
''Penny, where are we going,'' I ask her as she pulls out of the parking lot.
''To the hospital,'' her soft voice is tense.
''Why? What happened,'' I ask her as we stop behind another car at the red light ,''If someone you know is in the hospital, and you don't think you can drive, you can let me drive.''
''It's not me. It's Blair. She went into labor early,'' she sighs, changing a glance over at me.
She's only twenty-four weeks along. This can't be happening, the baby's not ready yet.
''I know it's a lot to take in,'' Penny continues after a long silence ,''But I am sure that they will both be okay.''
I nod, unable to speak. Honestly, I just hope she's right.
Because I'm not sure I can handle losing either one of them.
KPOV-
''You okay,'' Adam asks as we sit down.
''Yeah,'' I sighe, putting my phone away and taking a sip of my coffee, ''Blaine's alone with the kids all day. I'm just making sure they are okay.''
''See, what did I tell you?,'' Adam smirks, ''You're a catch. Blaine's lucky to have you.''
''Thank you, Adam,'' I try to smile, 'And I love being your friend, but I do think that we are dangerously close to crossing the line.''
''Right,'' he sighs ,''Sorry about that. I do tend to do that a lot. But I value our friendship a lot, Kurt, so I will respect whatever boundaries you and Blaine have.''
''I appreciate that, Adam.''
Because as much as I like being your friend, Blaine is my best friend. And I can't mess this up. We've worked so hard to get here, and in five days, it will be our first wedding anniversary.
And we'll prove to everyone who doubted us that we really can make it.
''It's Blaine,'' I explain to Adam as an acoustic version of Katy Perry's Teenage Dream plays from my phone, ''Hey, honey. What? Blaine, slow down. Oh… oh, damn, okay. I'll meet you there, yeah.''
Quickly, I grab my coat and phone and bag.
''Kurt, what's the rush,'' Adam begins, standing as I do, ''What's going on?''
''Blair went into labor at twenty-four weeks. Rory and Sugar took her, and I'm meeting Blaine and Ryder there. I'm sorry to do this to you, leaving all of a sudden,'' I tell him as we walk outside, towards my car.
''It's fine, Kurt. Chandler can come get me,'' he says as I place my things in the car, and turn to face him.
''Thanks for understanding. I just have to get to the hospital rather quickly, and make sure that she's okay, and be there for Blaine and Ryder-''
''Kurt, calm down,'' Adam tries, putting his hand on my shoulders.
''But I cant. Damn it, the baby is so early, even earlier than Gracie was, and-''
Soft, pink lips meet mine as Adam's warm hands cradle my face.
No. No, damn it, I can't do this to Blaine.
''Adam what the hell,'' I push him away from me, and he shoves his hands in his pockets.
''Honestly? I have wanted to do that for a while, Kurt. I apologize for the way that it happened, but not for the fact that it did indeed happen.''
''Adam,'' I take a deep breath ,''I feel awful. Like I just cheated on him, and I didn't even initiate the kiss. Like I couldn't push you away fast enough. Blaine is my husband, Adam. I refuse to knowingly do something to hurt him. He saved me from myself, taught me that I was worth loving, what love is… and I'm not gonna go throw it away for some fling with you, or anyone else. Blaine deserves more than that.''
''You deserve more than being with someone that you see less than you see me, Kurt,'' Adam argues.
''Blaine and I are on completely different schedules, yes, but we make it work,'' I snap ,''Because we're worth it, okay. Blaine and I are going to be fine. But this friendship of ours? It's over, Adam. I'm… I am not going to cheat on my husband. Goodbye, Adam.''
With that, I get in my car and drive away.
As if I need anything else on my plate… Santana was right afterall. And so were Mercedes, David, and Tina. It's a shame I could only hear what my friends would tell me now. I'd dismissed her accusations, saying that Adam was single, yes, but such a nice guy that he wouldn't dare cross the line.
But he did, and I had to fix it. I'd rather lose his friendship than lose Blaine. Blaine and I are faithful to each other. I'd never would have stayed friends with Adam this long if I'd known that what I'd believe to be simple, friendly gestures were really advances on me. Because I never would act on them, maybe that is why I didn't see them. I wouldn't do that to Blaine, because he would not do that to me. We're raising a family together, and are both at good places in our careers, and I am finally happy.
I have too much to lose. I won't let Adam ruin that. No one is worth losing Blaine over. I've known that since the day that we became official, and I have even more to lose now than I had then.
Unfortunately, I have to tell Blaine. If any paparazzi was around, this may get to him before I tell him. Today it'll be gossip, tomorrow they'll be rumors on all of the magazines and tabloids. ''Kurt Hummel having an affair?''. No, I won't do that to Blaine. He deserves to hear the truth from my own mouth, not from anyone else.
And I can only hope that this doesn't break him anymore.
BPOV-
''Blaine,'' I hear a breathy voice come from behind me, and I look up to see Kurt.
''Hey,'' I stand, pulling him into a hug, instantly feeling the smallest bit of comfort.
Comfort that only Kurt can give me.
''How is she,'' he asks, sitting next to me ,''How's the baby.''
''Her water broke at work. Rory was there with one of his friends from school, so he took her. Sugar and Ryder are in there with her, and Rory went to the bathroom. I… I have no idea what is going on with her, Kurt. The haven't said anything yet, and-and-''
''Hey,'' he takes my hand in his, holding it tight ,''She is going to be fine, and so is the baby. I just know it. For now, we have to keep calm. Where are the kids?''
''Jade and Liam are watching Grace and Jacob. Blair was in labor for over twelve hours last time, and I doubt they'd want to be here this time.''
''I assume that we will be staying then,'' Kurt asks, continuing after I nod ,''Okay. I'll ask Nick and Jeff to keep an eye on them, and make sure that they eat dinner.''
''Already taken care of,'' I smile, trying to keep the hint of pride out of my voice ,''Jeff said that he and Nick will check on the kids, make sure they eat dinner, and go to bed on time.''
''Well I see you are handling this a lot better than you did the first time,'' he laughs softly, then kisses me ,''I'm proud of you.''
''Thank you, Kurt. I honestly don't know how I would have gotten through any of this without you. I love you.''
''I love you, too,'' Kurt responds, then averts his eyes when Rory joins us.
He's tense, and it is perfectly obvious. He's probably just as worried about Blair and the baby as I am. And he has had to work late these past few weeks, so he is probably tired. I tend to read too much into things.
The one simple thing in my life is Kurt. It's not always easy, especially if this past year is any example. But somehow, despite all of the negativity that seems to constantly be swirling around us… we made it through.
That is more than enough to reassure me that Kurt Anderson-Hummel and I can make it through anything, as long as we are both willing to work for it. I know that I am.
I just hope that he is too.
RoryPOV-
''Dad,'' I ask, moving so my arm is around Sugar as she sleeps in the chair next to mine, but I can still talk to dad ,''You okay?''
Blaine and Ryder are in the delivery room with Blair. We have been here for six hours, and she is only six centimeter dilated.
''I'm fine, Rory. Thank you,'' my dad doesn't look up from his magazine.
''Okay… do you want to try looking me in the eye and saying that, dad?''
Because we both know that you are not telling the truth.
With a sigh, my dad closes the magazine.
''You are too observant sometimes, Rory. But you are an adult now, and I think you can handle the truth. Adam kind of admitted he had feelings for me, and it got physical. On his side, though. I pushed him away.''
Damn. I knew Adam was attracted to my dad. Hell, anyone but my dad saw it.
''Does Blaine know,'' I ask, but he shakes his head ,''Well, then, are you going to tell him? Because if he finds out from someone else, he is going to be really, really hurt.''
''I know. And I will tell him, I promise,'' dad agrees, looking exhausted ,''After the baby is born, though. He has enough on his plate, yeah?''
''I guess you are right,'' I admit ,'But you will tell him, right?''
''Of course. And I know I am usually the one that gives you advice, but thank you for this. I needed it. I am so, so proud of the amazing, caring young man that you have grown into. I'm proud of you, son.''
''I did learn from the best dad,'' I smile a bit.
We both know I can't erase the ten years with my birth parents. I love them, and I do miss them. But I have come to the realization that they are in a better place. And if anyone had to take care of me, I'm glad it was Kurt. He gets how badly losing a parent hurts, and i don't know too many people that would have taken me in so easily.
''I love you, dad. I'll do whatever I can for you,'' I remind him.
''I love you, too. And I'll always be there for you, Sugar, and the babies.''
''We know, and thank you. It means so, so much, dad.''
More than you can ever know.
I know there's a lot that Sugar and I will have to take care of ourselves. After all, the babies are our responsibility.
But I also know that if we ever need them, dad and Blaine are there.
That is the one thing that I am certain about.
BPOV-
''It hurts so bad,'' Blair whimpers.
We've been here for eleven hours, and she's seven centimeters dilated. At least she was last time we checked,
''I know,'' I push some hair off of her face as Ryder hands her the cup of ice.
I can't tell from experience, but the pain is evident on her face.
''Ms. Anderson, you are dilated nine centimeters. Just one more centimeter, and you can push.''
Blair groans, but nods as Ryder rubs her back.
''You're gonna be fine. I am going to be right here when you're done, Blair. I promise,'' I kiss her forehead.
''I know,'' she whispers, tightening her grip on my hand ,''Thank you, dad. I love you.''
''Love you, too.''
About a half hour later, the nurse checks again.
''You're fully dilated. Ms. Anderson, you are fully dilated, and are ready to begin pushing. Mr. Anderson-Hummel, will you be staying?''
''No,'' I press a kiss to Blair's head ,''I'll be right out here. You're going to be fine.''
She thought it'd be easier if it was just Ryder and her, and I'll do whatever it takes to make her feel better.
''Hey,'' Kurt stands up, reaching for my hands as I join him, Rory, and Sugar in the waiting room.
''Hey. She's okay. She's fully dilated, and getting ready to push. So… we'll see. It took half an hour with Grace, so this may take some time, too.''
''She will be fine, Blaine. I know it,'' Kurt insists, keeping his voice down.
It's late at night, and most people left in the waiting room are asleep.
''You must be starving. Let's go. Besides… I need to talk to you,'' Kurt says, leading me towards the vending machines in the cafeteria.
''What's up,'' I ask him.
He stops from pressing the buttons, then turns to me.
''I love you, Blaine,'' Kurt begins, gorgeous eyes trained on the floor, before he finally looks up at me ,''I love you more than my own life. You have to know.''
''I know,'' I bring a hand up to cup his face ,''I love you, too, Kurt. More than I love myself. What's going on? You've seemed on edge all day.''
''I can't lie to you… I c-can't-''
''Kurt,'' I reach up to wipe tears from his eyes, and his cheeks ,''Whatever it is. Talk to me.''
''Adam and I kissed,'' he says quietly.
Oh.
Just like my friends told me, the wall came falling down. Kurt and Adam acted on the mutual attraction that they feel for each other, like I'd hoped they wouldn't.
''So… days before our first wedding anniversary, the time when we can prove to everyone that has ever doubted us- my dad, people who act like they're our friends, the magazines and tabloids- that we can really make it, and you cheat on me?''
''I wanted you to hear it from me,'' he explains in a broken whisper, ''I'm so, so sorry.''
''I don't want to hear it. Not now,'' I sigh ,''We'll do this later.''
When I have my emotions in check. Because right now, all I want to do is yell at you, yell at Adam. Hurt you the way that you hurt me, because all of my insecurities have now become valid.
''I'm sorry I'm not good enough,'' I tell Kurt, reaching behind him to press the buttons on the vending machine.
He let's out a breath, and I finally look up at him.
I love him. Of course I do. Otherwise this wouldn't hurt so badly.
''Blaine, don't say that.,'' Kurt begs, taking my hand, ''You are more than good enough.''
But I can't erase this pain like it's nothing.
''Yeah, right. Sorry, Kurt. I'm really, really sorry, Kurt. But we'll have to start again.''
If we can both agree that it's worth it.
''Just… just tell me why-,'' I sigh.
Everything could have been ours.
''I never wanted to do that to you,'' Kurt admits ,''Adam kissed me, and I pushed him away from me the minute that it happened.''
''Wait. He kissed you. And you pushed him away as soon as it happened,'' I ask, and Kurt frantically nods.
''Because he's not my husband. I know what Chase did to you, to your heart and trust, but I'd never do that again. It was just as hard for you to fall in love again, despite the air of optimism that you so effortlessly give off.''
''But let me get this straight: the kiss happened, and you pushed him away.''
Please tell me this isn't a dream.
''Yes. That's exactly what happened.''
There I go again. Jumping to conclusions, letting my insecurities get the best of me.
Kurt would never do something to intentionally hurt me. Not after all we've been through.
So, of course, this changes everything.
KPOV-
''Okay,'' Blaine nods, taking my hand and resuming picking food from the vending machines.
''Blaine? I know you're tired, but do you actually not understand the… the weight of the situation that we are in,'' I ask him, taking his face in my hands, staring into gorgeous hazel eyes.
Or does it not matter to you anymore?
''Yes. I do. Andrew crossed the line, and he kissed you. And you thought about my feelings, and pushed him away. I understand that I married a good guy,'' Blaine smiles, moving from my grasp and back to the vending machines.
''B-but I kissed another guy, and-''
''Kurt, did you kiss him back,'' he asks, taking his chips from the vending machine.
''Well, no, but-''
''And did you remotely enjoy that kiss,'' Blaine questions, still not looking at me.
''Of course not, Blaine,'' I groan ,''It wasn't you. How could I enjoy it?''
''Then it wasn't cheating. Cheating, and I hate to say it, is what Ryder and Blair did to each other: knowing that you are supposed to be faithful to someone else, but acting on lust or mutual attraction with someone else. And you did not do that. Kurt, you have remained faithful to me. The only reason that you think any of this is even anywhere close to being your fault is because Andrew would blame everything on you. He made any problem in your relationship seem like it was your fault, and that's not right. Kurt, I am not going to let you fall like that this time. I won't do that. Kurt, I love you. We are both willing to work for this, so that's why it works. We're not the same people that we were when we met. And that is good. We have both grown, and we want the same things: love and a family.''
''So you forgive me,'' I breathe out, and Blaine presses his warm, pink lips to mine in a heated kiss, hands moving to my waist as my arms wrap around his neck.
''Kurt Elizabeth Anderson-Hummel, there is nothing to forgive. I'm glad that you talked to me. That you didn't keep it a secret, and let me find out from someone that has nothing to do with it. Don't worry about us. I love you,'' Blaine insists, lowering his voice to a whisper.
''I love you, too. Thank you, Blaine. I couldn't keep that in all day,'' I breathe out, glad to have it off of my chest.
''It's good. Kurt, we have been through a lot this year. Hell, we're still going through a lot. But somehow, we're going to make it. You and I,'' Blaine whispers ,''We'll be fine. We're gonna have it all.''
With that, we meet again for another sweet kiss, one passionate and motivated by everything we have been through together.
''I love you, Blaine,'' I let out a breathy laugh, smiling when he does ,''You're incredible.''
''I could say the same thing, Kurt,'' his minty breath washes over my face, ''Now, let's get our snacks and get back.''
Turns out I had nothing to worry about. Blaine loves me the way I love him, and the promise to remain faithful is there.
Blaine is right, and I see a bright future ahead of us, with our marriage, children, and careers.
Everything really is going to be ours.
BlairPOV-
Crying fills the air, and I fall back onto the bed.
Finally. My second child is here. And that sound is just as glorious as it was the day that Grace was born.
''You did it,'' Ryder kisses my forehead as they clean off my baby.
''Congratulations, Ms. Anderson, and Mr. Lynn,'' the nurse beams, finally letting us see our baby ,''You have a baby boy.''
He's tiny. So much smaller than even Grace was, but that is because he was born at twenty-four weeks.
But he's gorgeous.
''Hi, Noah,'' I whisper as Ryder runs a hand over the baby's head.
The next few seconds are a flurry of movements, and words that are being spoken to fast for me to understand in my sleepless confusion.
''What's happening,'' I ask when I don't get an answer.
''Ms. Anderson,'' the nurse begins as they take Noah out of the room ,''Since the baby was born so early, he needed to be taken to the NICU: the neonatal intensive care unit.''
''What's going to happen now,'' Ryder questions her, voicing the words that can not seem to make their way out of my mouth.
''He has not completed the normal development inside of the uterus that he would had he been born closer to term,'' she continues to explain ,''So now he will be put into an incubator. We will monitor him, and you guys can visit. The incubator shall keep your little one warm, and it will decrease the risk of an infection. It will also keep the baby from being dehydrated, since we can control the humidity.''
She continues explaining, but I have to know the one question that must be on Ryder's mind as well: ''Will he be okay?''
She looks down, before back up at Ryder and I with a sigh,''There is a fifty percent chance, yes.''
I feel sick to my stomach. More so than with the morning sickness.
''I will give you some time alone,'' the nurse insists.
Ryder thanks you as she exits, before moving so that I can see him.
''I'm sorry,'' I look down ,''I t-thought I did everything right, and-''
''You heard the doctor is not your fault. Noah will be fine,'' he kisses my forehead ,''I know it. And we are all going to get through this, Blair.''
I really hope you're right, Ryder.
''I love you,'' I whisper when he moves to wipe the tears from his eyes, then wiping away mine.
''I love you, too.''
''This kind of makes everything that we thought was important seem so insignificant,'' I admit, and continue when he nods ,''We're gonna make it through.''
I know we will.
RyderPOV-
''He's so tiny,'' Blair whispers a few hours later, when we finally get to see Noah.
He is. And he looks so tiny. There are these wires hooked up to him, and he's in a glass incubator.
''Noah has Respiratory Distress Syndrome. He has difficulty breathing due to the immaturity of his lungs, low blood pressure, and Retinopathy of Prematurity,'' the doctor explains ,''Which means the growth of the blood vessels in the retina of the eye is incomplete.''
She explains more as Blair stares at him, looking like she might cry again at any moment.
I cried, too. But I'm trying to stay stronger for her now, while the doctor tells us expectations and how we can interact with Noah while he is in the incubator, and everything else that we need to know.
''He's going to be fine,'' Blair tells me when she's gone ,''I… I don't need anyone to tell me that. I know he is. We can't give up on him, Ryder.''
''And we won't, Blair. We are going to do everything we can for him,'' I reassure her.
''Good,'' she nods, gently rubbing his tiny arm through the opening in the incubator ,''I love you, Noah Lynn.''
''She's right,'' I quietly tell him from the other side as I touch his small hand ,''Mommy and I love you. And we are right here. We're always going to care about you.''
And that is the only thing that I can promise right now.
I did as much research as I could for this. And it is dedicated to my cousin.
Disclaimer- glee belongs to Fox and Ryan Murphy.