Gabriel, hiding as Loki, was bored. Pranking the Winchesters had been amusing, but that had gotten boring rather quick when he found out they had a rescue dog in the back seat of Dean's precious car...and from the way the dog reacted he realized it belonged to the paranoid older brother and not the younger like he assumed.
Then he heard Dean ask the dog where the bone he had snapped into existence had come from, only to hear a chuffing woof in response. Dean took that as a sign it wasn't Sam who had let the air out of his tires (Gabriel had a soft spot for dogs himself, and he didn't want the pooch to get sick trying to find the stinky fish he was originally going to leave in the car) and the two went back to their room. Which Gabriel had left alone after messing with Sam's laptop.
The only reason he didn't hear Dean's whispered conversation on how to prank the Trickster back was because like quite a few people (including a ravenous horde of fan girls Dean had quite happily left behind when he was Harry) he believed the brothers to be in an incestuous relationship.
Oh how Gabriel would later regret not paying more attention to the two. Especially after Dean's revenge kicked in.
"So we sure this guy is really a Trickster?"
"Ten bucks says it has to be the janitor. Mort practically had an evil look on his face when he spotted that one," said Dean.
"Right... So what are we going to do to 'repay' him for the crap he's put us through?"
"He's definitely got a soft spot for dogs. Did you see the size of that bone Bear was eating when we came out?"
"I thought that was your doing. You treat him almost as good as you treat the car," admitted Sam.
"Dude, it was a fucking dino-sized bone. Where the hell would I have hidden that thing in the Impala?" scoffed Dean.
Sam privately conceded his point.
"Okay, I vote ten wet burritos and one enchilada."
"Good, but I was thinking a revenge prank first... see how he likes being scared the crap out of," said Dean.
"Exorcist Stitch?" guess Sam.
"Damn straight. Good thing Bear doesn't mind playing fetch with my creature form," smirked Dean.
Bear loved the Stitch doll on the dash board. Sam once joked it was his 'baby' in the car. Occasionally Sam had seen Dean being carried around like a puppy by his dog, Bear wagging his tail happy as could be. He had pictures.
"I was thinking we send Bear in first, and get the Trickster to play 'fetch' with the 'doll'. Then, once he's about to throw me again I'll do my exorcist bit and the insane cackle that always gives Crow the wiggins for some reason."
Sam and Dean didn't even react when Mort appeared.
Did I hear the word prank and Trickster in the same sentence? The 'reaper' asked hopefully.
We're planning to repay the jerk for messing with our stuff. And I promise a slightly-wet Bear Bomb.
I want pictures, and lots of them, plus the guarantee that you'll stay long enough to see how long he takes to wake up again once Bear unleashes his best weapon,said Mort immediately.
Mort had a score to settle with a certain pain-in-the-ass arch angel, and this was the perfect time to do it. Besides, watching people's reactions to Bear's little gas problem after eating Mexican food was always fun.
We're all ears for suggestions, said Dean eagerly. It wasn't often they could get Mort into a Harvelle Prank session.
Gabriel didn't notice the camera, but he did wonder why the hunters were sending in their dog first with a toy. It looked like something he had seen once on a Disney poster, but he couldn't remember which.
It was pretty clear what the dog wanted.
Gabriel chuckled and threw the doll almost into a chair, and the dog picked it up gently like it was a puppy when it brought the thing back. A few more throws, and the dog was wagging it's tail like mad.
He was about to throw it onto the stage when the 'doll' suddenly turned it's head a full three-sixty and did this freaky cackle that scared the living crap out of him...before it said in a really creepy voice that sounded like some sort of twisted parody of a child speaking "I'm coming for you Loki..."
Gabriel took one look at the thing's eyes and shit himself from shock. The 'doll' which clearly wasn't a doll turned into some sort of weird ball and started rolling right out the door. The dog chuffed in amusement and Gabriel was about to leave when he heard the doors clearly lock from outside.
Wondering what the hell was going on, he then noticed said canine doing a really weird dance.
That was the last thing he remembered before this Father-awful smell hit his nose after the dog let loose a tremendous fart that he would later swear shook dust off the rafters above him.
Dean had a stop watch in one hand and a gas mask in the other. The moment he heard movement he put the mask on and waited for Loki to come to the door trying to escape the smell.
Eleven wet burritos, one enchilada and two churros tended to make it pretty rank. He almost pitied whoever tried to get the smell out later.
Seeing Loki stumble out of the auditorium, Dean hit the timer. Eleven minutes wasn't bad after that sort of Bear Bomb.
"Dear gods what is that awful smell from?!" said Loki gasping for fresh air.
"Mexican food,"said Sam and Dean in unison. Dean suddenly sniffed the air.
"Dude... did you actually shit yourself when I did my exorcist routine?"
Loki suddenly stiffened and realized that yes, there was a mess in his briefs he hadn't noticed.
"I was never here and that never happened," said Loki flatly.
"You think we're really not going to crow to other hunters that we out-pranked a Trickster?" said Dean grinning from ear to ear.
Loki narrowed his eyes at him. Ass.
"So how did you like Bear's surprise?"
"You named a dog Bear?"
"Have you seen how big my dog is?" countered Dean.
"Touche Winchester," said Loki. Dean and Sam both had it with people getting their last name wrong. They slapped him on the head in perfect sync.
"OW! What was that for?!"
"We're the Harvelle brothers, not Winchesters," they said in open annoyance.
"Say what now?"
"Dude, you were just pranked by the Harvelle brothers and you didn't know it?" said Dean.
"Back up a minute, since when the hell are you two not Winchesters?!" said Loki bewildered.
"We haven't been going by Winchester for over ten years now," said Sam rolling his eyes.
"Why is it that only the magical creatures ever get our name right?" complained Dean.
"So are you two going to kill me or what?"
Sam and Dean cocked their head, as did Bear.
"Why would we want to kill you?" asked Sam, honestly confused.
"Uh, I did kill two humans?" said Loki.
"Yeah, and? They were almost bigger assholes than the angels, at least according to Mort."
"Who's Mort?"
"Panama, 1741. He still has pictures," said Dean.
Loki's eyes doubled in size almost comically.
"Holy shit. How the hell did you two idiots meet him and live?"
"What? For a reaper he's not that bad," said Sam. Dean choked back a laugh.
"A reaper? You actually think that guy is... You didn't tell him?" said Loki, taking an educated guess Dean at least knew who Mort really was.
"Mort gave the last Marauder a second chance, and yes I do know who Mort actually is. Frankly it's easier just to tell people I see reapers," said Dean.
"Wait, what? Okay, now I really need to have a chat with 'Mort'," said Loki, eyes narrowing.
"By the way, the official score is now Harvelle's 1, Loki 0," said Dean smirking. He grabbed Bear and Sam took that as their queue to leave.
Loki was very surprised that they disappeared with an audible crack.
Dean would later giggle evilly when Mort showed them a memory of his chat with Loki. It was like someone had slapped him repeatedly with flowers. They couldn't hear what was said, but from the look on Loki's face it was definitely something he wasn't expecting. Then Mort mentioned the real reason the brothers had sought out the Trickster and he grew a rather devious face.
Now that finally crack Dean had made before leaving made a lot more sense.
By the way, Loki says the next time you get bored, look him up and then you'll have a real prank war on your hands. He seemed very impressed by you two, said Mort amused.
How did he like the news that the Marauders live again in the form of the Harvelle siblings?
Jo had a prankster streak too, but she rarely got to use it on anyone outside of boys who dumped her for another. The last guy who dumped her had been before prom, and that guy still cried if he thought Jo was in the same state as him.
Dean was proud to say he taught her most of the pranks she still used on people who pissed her off.
Dean was in Stitch mode again. He seemed to be spending a lot of time in his creature form.
Today they were on the hunt for a rogue werewolf. One who already had a victim that survived.
Chances were they would have to get the Ministry to relocate the poor idiot who got bit. It wouldn't be the first time.
However since Stitch had night vision (strange as that was) Dean knew it would be a better idea to stay in creature form and let Sam handle this with input from the 'walkie talkie' inside the 'doll'. Which was their cover for why Stitch could talk with minimal lip movement.
Oh, and it freaked the hell out of people in the process until Sam explained.
That didn't stop people from asking why Bear carried the doll everywhere like it was his baby.
"So you going to stay like that the entire hunt?" asked Sam casually.
"I'm bored and Mort has no idea where Loki is. So yes," said Stitch.
Dean plus boredom always meant bad things...for others.
"Whatever. Good thing I know how to cast a doppelganger spell, otherwise I would be on my own," said Sam rolling his eyes.
Sam had to learn that spell to deal with rather annoying fan girls who were interesting in dating the tallest guy on campus. It had been a relief finding Jess. It was easier making a double of himself than it was of Dean though.
For a few days everything was normal...right up until Sam made a monumental mistake and slept with the newly infected werewolf girl. Dean was never letting him live that one down. He was just lucky Bear scared her off before she bit him.
"That does it. Sammy, hand me a phone. Mine are on the chargers," said Dean tiredly.
Sam handed over his hunter phone.
"Department of Creature Relocation. This is Amanda speaking."
"Yeah, we have a newly infected werewolf and I think it would be easier to relocate her since she doesn't seem inclined to hurt others."
"One moment please. Can I have your ID number and location?"
Dean rattled off the number and which town they were in. He knew that the American Ministry was much more reasonable with creatures and those recently infected. At least this woman would have a chance at a normal life.
They stayed long enough to insure she was given all the bare facts and where to go when the moon was full. They couldn't cure her, but they could give her a semblance at being normal again.
By the time they left, Dean was no longer in his creature form, but he was snoring in the back seat with Bear on top of him, to Sam's open amusement. Then again, cooling charms made it easier for his brother to ignore the fact that there was a giant dog on his chest.
Sam snorted. At this point he highly doubted Dean would even care if Bear drooled on him. He loved that dog too much.
"Fucking Djinn..." muttered Dean. The idiot had put him into some sort of twisted parody of the perfect life and like most supernatural freaks of nature, he got the parents wrong.
Yes, he would have loved to know his birth mother, but he could care less if that asshole John lived or not. And that chick he saddled Dean with?
Yeah right. Give him Bear any day of the week... at least he knew his dog was loyal to him. She looked a lot like that pin-up girl he saw in one his gun magazines.
So was he fooled by this crappy illusion?
Not a chance in hell.
Dean growled to himself as he robbed his brother's 'house' of anything silver and proceeded to get some blood. Sam tried to stop him, but Dean cold-cocked him and knocked the double out. If that really was Sam, he would understand why once he came to. If not, well he was sure his brother had done something at some point to deserve it.
Looking at the Impala, he had a sudden urge to really confuse this bastard.
The black car immediately turned into a familiar broom from Harry's memory.
The illusion faltered briefly. Dean looked around.
Why was he in Hogwarts? He had never gone there in this... Oh.
Dean's grin grew predatory. So that was the idiot's game. He was drawing on memories. Time to kick this illusion in the ass. Letting the bleed through from his past life hit him full force, he found that the scenery kept getting mixed up. It was too easy to see that this was fake.
And when the Djinn appeared, looking pretty pissed off, Dean took vindictive pleasure in stabbing him in the chest.
He woke up a few hours later with a familiar canine face in front of his own. Bear's breath reeked.
"Dammit Bear, get the hell off of me!" said Dean.
Bear licked him in the face in response. Sam cackled evilly.
"You alright Dean?"
"Fucking peachy. Bet that Djinn was confused as hell when I started to scramble the memories. Just out of curiosity did I knock your ass out recently through a punch?"
"Dude, if you had I wouldn't have settled for letting Bear wake your heavy ass up," said Sam flatly.
"Good. Glad to know that was a fake Sam like I thought."