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It was 3.30am when Monica found herself stood in the cold hallway staring at the boys' door. She couldn't sleep, her brain in overdrive thinking about Chandler. It was such a big decision, a huge decision that had the power to change both of their lives. She couldn't risk getting it wrong.

Whenever she had a dilemma or something on her mind, she went to Chandler. The number of times they'd shared late night, or middle of the night discussions. They'd stay up in their sweats or pjs, cuddled on the couch with a blanket and just talked. She always felt so much better afterwards, despite the fact that usually nothing had actually changed. There was just something about bonding with him.

Part of her wondered if this was a good idea. Sure, he usually made her feel better but this decision affected him also. Would he want to see her? He had offered though, said he was there if she wanted to talk to him and their conversation earlier had been so honest that she needed more. Needed to see him.

Decision made, she tried the handle, smiling when it opened, not surprised that despite being robbed recently they still forgot to lock it. Her smile turned into a frown though as she saw the television was on, quietly casting light and shadows across the living room. There was a lone figure in the canoe watching the precariously balanced tv, who turned at the sound of the door.

"Oh hi," Kathy said with a surprised smile.

"Hi," Monica returned, suddenly uncomfortable to be standing in the boys' apartment in an over-sized Giants sweater, shorts and tube socks at 3.30am.

"What are you doing here?" Kathy asked.

"I, uh," god, she felt stupid. "I came to speak with Chandler."

"Oh," Kathy looked surprised and Monica wondered if she could see something else in her eyes. Jealously? Could Kathy be jealous of her? Surely not, she couldn't know Chandler's feeling towards her. "Well, I think he's asleep. To be honest he usually joins me to watch this," she gestured towards the old sitcom playing quietly on the screen, "but I haven't seen him tonight."

Monica had to hide a smile at that news. Had Chandler completely stopped chasing Kathy because of her? She hoped so. Even if she decided not to have a relationship with him, he really shouldn't continue after Kathy if she was just a rebound. It wouldn't be fair to Kathy or Joey.

"That's ok," Monica waved almost dismissively, "I'll just…" she gestured towards Chandler's door.

"Oh," Kathy seemed surprised, "ok."

"Night Kathy."

"Good night Monica."

Monica tried to look more confident than she felt as she walked up to his door. She was very conscious of the fact that Kathy was watching her and she couldn't retreat. She had to do this. She gently tapped on his door before pushing open both parts and sneaking in.

Closing the door sections she let out a sigh.

"You ok?"

She jumped at the sound of his voice, not realizing he was awake.

"Yeah," she dismissed quickly walking further towards him. The room was dark but the lights through the window showed his silhouette clearly, "I hope you don't mind. I couldn't sleep and my brain was starting to hurt so I figured-"

"It's fine Mon," he interrupted her quietly, "you're always welcome, you know that."

She breathed a silent sigh of relief, very glad that the risk she'd taken in coming here had panned out.

"Thanks," she hovered by the bed.

"You wanna join? Or did you wanna go talk on the couch…canoe?" he corrected realizing the lack of furniture he owned. He really had to do something to rectify that. "We can take a blanket?"

She smiled, he really did know her well.

"I'll join you if that's ok?" she asked, "Kathy's currently occupying the canoe."

"Ah," he glanced at the luminous numbers on his nightstand. "She'll be watching her late-night reruns."

"Yeah," Monica commented in what she hoped was a light way, as she climbed into his bed, "she's surprised you're not out their watching it with her…"

"I told you," he could hear her silent question, "if there's even a small chance you'll be in a relationship with me, I'll wait. I'm not interested in her."

"Just like that?" she asked softly, "you seemed to really like her."

He let a little chuckle, "you should have seen what was going on in my head the last few months whenever I was around you," he confessed, "any feelings I had towards Kathy can't even compare to the torch I've been carrying for you."

"Really?" she asked.

"Uh huh, I promise," he nudged her shoulder with his. "It's like with Ross and Julie and Rachel. There was only ever gonna be one option."

Monica sighed heavily, "but look how that turned out. I've been thinking lots about them and comparing them with our situation."

"Me too," he admitted, "but I came to a realization."

"Care to share?"

"They aren't us," he said simply, causing her to frown.

"That's it?"

He rolled his eyes and clarified, "I'm not Ross and you aren't Rachel. If you think of all the arguments and drama they had before the whole 'break' thing even came about..." he winced with an uncomfortable shrug, not wanting to insult their friends. "They had a lot of issues with their relationship before it happened. Their friendship wasn't as strong as ours is. We'd be going into this with 9 plus years of friendship. I'm closer with you than anybody."

"And me with you," she confirmed thoughtfully.

"We wouldn't be constantly nit-picking, arguing or have constant mistrust issues. We're best friends, we already know, trust and love each other. As much as I love Rachel and I'm not saying this in a bad way but you're nowhere as near high maintenance or…princessy as she is."

"I won't tell her you said that," she smiled bumping his shoulder with hers.

"I mean," he grinned back, "I couldn't imagine ever wanting to be in a relationship like theirs. It was a lot of hard work, they're 2 very strong-willed, very different people and it just didn't work. We aren't them and I know you and I are very different people but where Ross and Rachel were like fire and gasoline, we'd actually...complement one another."

"You think so?"

"I know so," he grinned, "we do it all the time as we are. You get wound up and high strung over something and I'll break a joke and give you a hug and help you to calm down and not to worry so much. We balance each other out."

"True," she mused, thinking just how right he was.

"I think that's what you need in a successful relationship," he admitted. "I think if you're too alike things will get boring, if you're both too intense things will get explosive, but if you can find someone who compliments you. Someone that knows your quirks and your moods and instead of making fun or deliberately stoking them, accepts them and maintains them where necessary...that's gotta be pretty perfect."

"Wow," Monica said for the second time. "Since when did you get so grown up about this kinda stuff?"

"Since I fell in love with you," he murmured then grimaced, "sorry, I shouldn't have said that. I promised to give you time to think about it all and I'm not trying to-"

"Hey," she interrupted him, "its fine. I'm the one that came into your bedroom in the middle of the night. I wanted an honest conversation, so don't ever feel bad for saying stuff like that."

"Ok," he smiled before his face cracked open with a large yawn, which he tried to hide behind his hand, "sorry."

"No, that's ok," she sighed. "I should probably try and get some sleep too."

"Wanna sleep here?" he risked asking quietly. "We've fallen asleep together before and we're fully-clothed."

She had an internal debate for a moment. Part of her knowing it might not be the wisest decision but another, larger part of her was pointing out that if she wanted to see what being in a relationship with Chandler would be like, sleeping next to him and waking up beside him tomorrow morning could only help. Plus she wouldn't have to see Kathy again.

She just didn't want to risk hurting him.

"You sure?"

"Uh huh," he offered her a lop-sided grin as his sock-covered foot nudged hers, "positive."

Something about his sleepy-cute look made him impossible to say no to. Not that she wanted to say no anyhow, not really.

"Ok," she made her decision, "thanks Chandler."

His smile was large and instant. He knew he shouldn't get his hopes up. He knew he was playing a dangerous game in which he stood to get his heart broken. But it felt right. It felt right that he should try and help his best friend make this decision, despite whatever she chose. It could only help make their friendship strong, strong enough for whatever the outcome.

Monica settled down under his covers. As her head lay on the pillow she inhaled deeply, finding the scent she found there comforting. She felt surrounded by him and slowly relaxed. Her whirling mind slowing down and a contented peace flowing through her. She knew it was only temporary but right now she didn't care.

She heard him whisper 'good night' to her and she mumbled something back in response, slumber already finding her.

Chandler stayed awake for a while longer, listening to her soft breathing. He savored it, trying to commit everything about this moment to his permanent memory. If she decided against a relationship with him, which she might very well do, this may be the last time she ever shared his bed like this.

He wanted to remember this forever.

TBC...