Trigger warning- mentions of body issues, eating disorders, parent issues.

And there's a slight tribute to Finn, as well.

RyderPOV-

Blair and I just finished our couple's counseling session at NYADA, and our waiting for my mom to drop Noah off. She wanted to spend Valentine's Day spoiling her only grandchild, and we were happy to indulge.

Besides, we'll have the whole rest of the day with him, so why complain? At least we know he's being taken care of.

''I'm doing a lot better since we've been going to these sessions, Blair,'' I remind her, wrapping an arm around her waist, ''You know that, right?''

''Yes. But, and I'm just being honest, we've been distant these past few days. the physical part of this marriage is important to us. Physical intimacy is important to us. WHen one of us starts to pull away from that, something is wrong. When you do, it is usually because you're unsure of something. The last thing I want is for you to be unsure of yourself, Ryder. I want you to feel comfortable with yourself. Then, I can be comfortable. Then we can try for another baby.''

I'd noticed how the look of disappointment mixed in with relief when

''I am trying to get better,'' I laugh gently, ''Even if it does worry me that you're going to be around guys who are much more handsome and talented.''

I try to keep my voice carefree, but she sees through it.

''Ryder, I'm in love with you. Not them.''

And why is that exactly? When you could be with a guy that treats you right from the star

Even if there have been times where she made me feel lower than dirt, I always regret hurting her when I knew she was vulnerable and wouldn't fight back.

''I know. And I love you, too. We wouldn't be together after all of the stupid shit we put each other through if we didn't know we were supposed to end up together.''

''Exactly,'' she moves her hands to the buttons on my shirt, ''Besides, you're the most good-looking guy ever.''

''Yeah right,'' I laugh breathily when she presses a kiss to my neck, ''I don't have abs anymore… well, they're not as defined. and I'm kinda skinny.''

''There is absolutely nothing wrong with don't have to look a certain way, Ryder,'' she slides my shirt off of me before pressing more kisses to the skin of my neck, ''Do you like my body?''

''Of course I do. You're gorgeous,'' I tell her what she's already started to believe.

And I'm not just talking about her physical beauty. It may sound stupid or cliche', and I'll only ever admit it to her, but I do love every inch. The stretch marks, the scratches, the way she moves when she dances…

Like a living, breathing work of art.

''And I love every inch of your body. Don't put yourself down. You are handsome and smart and loving and everything I want. So when the day comes that you're finally comfortable with yourself, we'll move forward. Look, whatever happens, I'm by your side. We have hit a lot of bumps in the road, but you've helped me with my recovery. So now, I help you. Because I love you.''

''I love you, too. Now, we have an hour before Noah comes back, and you have to go out to dinner with your parents. I say we make the most of that hour.''

Her laugh rings through the apartment as her skirt joins my shirt on the floor.

Because this is exactly what we need: a break from the world.

No matter how short it is.

KPOV-

''What are you looking at,'' I ask Blaine as he lounges across the bed, staring at his phone while I pull my shirt on.

Today is the day we tell te kids the gender of their new baby sibling, and I couldn't be more excited.

Blaine, on the other hand, has been quiet since we picked Grace and Jacob up from school.

''We've got great kids, haven't we? And they're cute, too, yeah,'' he motions for me to join him.

On his screen is a picture of Rory and Blair from high school, when they'd fallen asleep in front of the television, sharing a blanket.

''We do, yeah,'' I slide to the next one, which is of Jacob and Gracie playing together, then the one of Liam carrying Jade on his back last year when we went to the beach.

My favorite of all, though, is the family picture of all six kids. It was last September, at Blair and Ryder's wedding, when we took them out for the day, one of our last family bonding moments for a while.

They're leaning against the wall, oldest to youngest: Rory, Blair, Liam, Jade, Jacob, and Grace. It was supposed to be a nice picture, but nothing is ever organized with the Anderson-Hummels.

I love it nonetheless. The only one looking at the camera is Gracie. Rory and Blair are laughing at something the other must have said, Jacob is giggling at Jade as she bats Liam's hands away from her hair. It's unorganized, and not at all traditional.

So, in a way, it's just perfect for our family.

''And, pretty soon, we'll have another baby. Nervous?''

''A bit,'' I admit, ,''But it's not like we haven't raised a baby together before.''

''And she's turning out so wonderfully,'' Blaine grins ,''Although I think Grace would have been just fine if Ryder and Blair raised her. I wouldn't give up that experience for anything though.''

''Exactly. And I wasn't there for the birth of Rory, Blair, Liam, Jade or Jacob. Other than Blair and Grace, you've missed some of the most important years of our kid's lives as well. I will always love them no matter how old they are, but...''

''Watching them grow up is an entirely different experience?''

''Does that sound bad,'' I groan, closing my eyes.

''No, of course not. I get it. Don't worry, we're going to be just fine. The hardest part is going to be telling them the gender, because, even if they love this baby, someone's going to be disappointed.''

''I know,'' I laugh, ''Jacob and Grace want a puppy if they don't get a little brother or sister, respectively.''

He chuckles, bringing me in for a kiss that threatens to get heated. And it probably would...

''Papa, daddy,'' Grace peeks her head in, ''We're ready.''

...if we didn't have kids who don't know how to knock before they enter a room.

''What did I tell you about knocking, Grace Elizabeth,'' I ask sternly, standing and picking up my jacket.

''Sorry. But I made you this,'' she strolls in, taking her hands from behind her back to reveal two pink, heartshaped cards, ''Happy Valentine's Day!''

''Thank you,'' I pick her up, pressing kisses to her cheeks as she giggles, ''Happy Valentine's day, sweetie.''

''Come on, Gracie,'' Blaine reaches for her hand when I set her back on the floor, ''Let's go get your coat on.''

She skips behind him, a grin on her face as she tightly holds Blaine's hand.

''So, what is it you guys want to tell us,'' Rory asks as we all sit at the longest table the restaurant has to offer.

Regina, Blair, Grace, Rory, and I are one side, Blaine, Liam, Jade, and Jacob on the other.

''Well, today I went to the doctor,'' Regina states, ''So we could find out the gender of the baby.''

''That means if we're having a girl or a boy,'' Blaine explains to Grace, who looks confused.

''Yes! Finally. I was thinking about this all day,'' Jade squeals, positive as usual, ''What is the new baby?''

''Well,'' Blaine grins, taking my hand across the table, ''You guys should get ready for your little brother.''

There's silence before Grace pipes up, ''You said I was getting a puppy if I didn't get a little sister.''

''Well, you're not. Hate to break it to you. But you're going to be a big sister, Gracie! Isn't that exciting?''

''Maybe,'' she bites her lip before speaking again, ''Will I get to tell my baby brother what to do?''

''Uh, well,'' Blaine stutters out at the sudden shift in mood, ''When you're older and can babysit.''

'With some boundries, of course,'' I add in, watching Blair smirk in amusement.

''Well,'' Rory begins, ''I think we're all glad about the new baby. There are only thirteen weeks left to prepare, but we can do it. It will be cool to have a new little brother.''

And there he goes, making always seeing the bright side.

One of the many reasons I am proud to call him my son.

''What's his name going to be,'' Liam asks.

''Well, we were thinking Eli. Eli Christopher Finn Anderson-Hummel. But no one tells grandma Carole or grandpa Burt. We want it to be a surprise.''

Because-in a way- Finn never really left. After discussing it with Blaine, I want a part of him to be with our child.

''The new baby can sleep in my room,'' Jacob offers before frowning, ''No diapers, though.''

''Yeah, don't put me down for diaper duty,'' Jade shakes her head.

''I think what they mean,'' Blair stresses, ''Is that we would be happy to do our share. The Anderson-Hummels stick together.''

''Thank you, Blair,'' Blaine smiles, ''That means a lot.''

And I guess it would. Blair and Rory taught Blaine and I what it's like to be parents, respectively. It was our first taste on this crazy, bumpy, winding road of parenting.

And this journey is far from over.

SugarPOV-

''Shhhh,'' I buckle Finn into his carseat, glad to see Wendy's still fast asleep, ''Take a nap. We're going to meet daddy at home. Just go back to sleep.''

Luckily, he does as a I say, dozing off as soon as he's all strapped in.

''Thanks for watching them, dad. There was literally no one else that could,'' I explain.

Today is the longest my dad and I have talked since December. Rory has tried to mend things for us, but to no use. Because my dad and I are too alike for our own good, which means neither one of us wants to admit defeat.

In his case it is out of pride. In my case, it is out of fear of further parental rejection.

''You're welcome. I do have to say, though, those two wore me out. I haven't taken care of someone so small in so long.''

''Yeah, well, I guess you'd better get used to it. You will have another baby soon, after all.

And please don't start neglecting him or her like you did me.

''So that's what this is about? All of this distance and anger because you're jealous of your unborn little brother or sister?''

''No. All of this 'bitterness' is because I feel like I'm second to everything in my dad's life. Mom got it together to be there for me, but you haven't. And here you are, all excited for the new baby you're having with your girlfriend. She hates me. by the way. In case you have not noticed.''

Of course you haven't. If it involves me, it's no longer important.

''You're just like your mother,'' he mutters under his breath ,''I'm not going to get into a fight with you, Sugar. Not now.''

''The only reason I don't want to continue this conversation is because my children are in the car, and I don't want them to wake up. Besides, we know how this ends. And I'm not going to be responsible for complications with your heart. I love you, dad. This sucks, because my stress level has gone down since we haven't talked as much. I'm eating better and my body is functioning properly.''

And it hurts to know it took distancing myself from you for things to change.

''So I was the cause of all of your health problems.''

''You didn't exactly help, dad.''

There. Now the whole truth is out. No more sparing feelings and only ending up making things worse.

''I'm sorry you feel that way, Sugar. I didn't know that I was such a negative factor in your otherwise positive life,'' he bitterly states

Seriously?

''We have had this conversation before. You hear me, but you don't listen to me. I'm tired of explaining things to you when you don't even care about what I have to say. It stresses me out. Then, I don't take care of myself properly. And I know I, personally, have to be in good health to help Rory take care of our children. Just about everything I do is for them. Because, to me, that's what being a parent is all about: my kids come first. I can't let them be around you and your negativity. For the thirty minutes that I spent with you when I came to get Wendy and Finn, you used twenty of those minutes to insult me. And that is just not fair. So those are my reasons.''

I know my worth, finally. And I can't have a relationship with you if you're constantly berating me. I won't risk my kids feeling inferior because of a cruel comment that they're grandfather made about them.

''Look, I'm sorry okay.''

''I've already forgiven you. But I still don't want any toxic people in my life.''

I think I deserve that much. And it took me years to figure that out, but that doesn't matter. The important thing is that I know now.

''I still want to be involved in my younger brother or sister's life. If you and Gloria will let me, that is.''

Although that is very unlikely, seeing as Gloria despises me.

''You will be. How about we agree that the only reason I contact you is to update you about the baby's progress.''

''That sounds reasonable to me,'' I agree, pushing off of the car, ''I do love you dad, and I hate that it has to be this way.''

''I love you, too, Sugar. I' sorry it has to be this way, too.''

With that, I get back into my car, starting my drive back to New York CIty.

So that's it. I probably I just left part of my life behind, but it's probably for the best. Actually, I know it is. I can be involved in my little brother or sister's life without having my dad constantly berate me. In a way, it's kind of a relief.

Everything I went through growing up makes me want to be the best mom for my kids. Rory is doing an incredible job, already. And I know I can be better. So as much as it sucks, this is what I have to do.

Because sometimes the hardest things are the most beneficial.

BlairPOV-

''Where we going, mommy?''

''Mommy has an appointment she can't miss. And daddy and your grandparents are all busy,'' I tell Noah, shifting him to my other hip as I open the door, ''Which is why you went with mommy to work.''

And attempted to do the choreography with us, which was adorable.

''Hold on tight to your cup,'' I remind Noah, getting on the elevator, pulling his hat off for him.

Only three years ago, he was in the hospital, fighting for his life. Back then, everything felt so… hopeless. The medical bill seemed impossible to pay, not to mention all of the baby supplies we needed and could barely afford.

Ryder and I had just moved in together, and sometimes had to hold down two jobs to make ends meet. I was recovering from my eating disorder, desperately hoping not to relapse with the amount of stress and self-hate that was being piled on me.

Now, though, things are finally going the way I only dreamed they would.

''Sorry I'm late,'' I walk into the room, ''Noah wanted to stop and chase all of the pigeons.''

''It's fine. I have a three year old too,'' Summer smiles at my son, ''So, are you ready, Blair?''

''Yeah,'' I place Noah on the couch, ''Stay here, mommy will be out in a little while.''

He nods, playing with the picture book, ''Okay, mommy.''

''I have to admit, I'm a little shocked at how talented you are. I typically don't trust Elliot's… I mean, Starchild's judgment when it comes to new talent. Because he believes everyone deserves a chance. But you… you've got something special. So, I'm ready when you are. just go into the boot, and we can begin.''

It's finally happening: I'm recording my first album. With Starchild's help, I'll promote it.

This is real. My songs are going to be recorded for everyone to hear. My pain and heartbreak, my love and joy, all written down into lyrics to be shared. it's a long way to the top, but I'm taking the first step there.

And nothing's going to stop me.

Disclaimer- glee belongs to Fox and Ryan Murphy, Ian Brennan, and Brad Falchuk.