Dashing through the snow

GET THE FUCK OUT MY WAY

GOD DAMN YOUR SLOW

JESUS, HOW MUCH DO YOU WEIGH?!

You also smell

Like Naruto's stank ass breath

Now as I god I tell you to fucking sing along with me!

Oh, Jingle Bells

BURN IN HELL

YOU'RE THE BANE OF MY DAY

I'LL SLASH YOUR TIRES

SET YOUR HOUSE ON FIRE

AND LAUGH AS I RUN AWAY

YEAH BITCH!

Twas three nights before Christmas, when all through the house

Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,

In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there.

Umeko Haruno, immediately opened her eyes and looked up.

"Okay, I'll bite, what the fuck is this?" she asked out loud.

"Toooonight you'll be visited by threeee ghosts!" Umeko heard.

"No. NO! No Christmas bull shit! Fuck Christmas! I said it already and I'll say it again! I'll hate fucking Christmas until the very end!"

What she saw next she could not comprehend.

"Me?" she said confused to no end.

She saw herself from the world before, Marcy Amelia Bend.

"I am the ghost of who you once were, the ghost of Christmas past. Long ignored, long forgotten, but still a soul of a woman gone rotten."

"Fucking rhymes getting on my nerves. I hear one more, I'll kick someone's ass right through my bedroom door!"

"Umeko... Why are you screaming?" a tired Sakura said at that very door, eyes tiredly gleaming.

"Fucked up dream." Umeko said, glad she didn't have to go to the past which she would love for that to just stay dead.

"Well, okay just try to be quiet." Sakura whispered, tip toeing back to her room to get in her bed.

"Okay, enough with rhyming..." Umeko grumbled, but ready to give up on trying.

"Umeko wake up!" Sakura said, shaking me awake.

"The fuck?" I said, now glad it was in my point of view, so the rhyming could fucking stop.

"It's two days until Christmas and we still need to go shopping!" Sakura exclaimed.

I grumbled at her and put Doug over my head.

"They can all go eat dicks... I ain't gettin' going out and gettin' them SHIT!" I said.

"You need to get the Christmas spirit, Umeko! I bet they got you something! I already got you something, Hinata got you something, even that idiot Naruto remembered to get you something!" Sakura said loudly.

"BAH! HUMBUG BITCH!" I yelled.

"You are just unbelievable!" Sakura yelled.

I was snoring by the time she was done with the sentence.

Sakura's POV

"I've called you all here for a really important meeting!" I said to those who gathered after I literally dragged them out of their houses.

Hinata, Naruto, Daiki, Makoto, and even my Sasuke we're all dragged there.

"Umeko has NO Christmas spirit! She hasn't gotten anyone any gifts and she even said bah humbug to me! We have to get her into Christmas or we'll never see her smile or anything! I've known her all my life and the most I've seen is a smirk! It's like trying to get Kakashi-sensei's mask off. If she gets into the Christmas spirit, then she'll be happier and maybe less of a headache to be around!" Sakura said.

"That is literally the stupidest thing I've ever heard." Daiki deadpanned as the rest of the group sat in silence.

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU SAY TO ME!?" I yelled giving him a hard whack on the head.

"Um, what Daiki meant to say is that we will be happy to help get Umeko into the holiday spirit!" Hinata said cheerfully.

Daiki just sat silently with a total Shikamaru look on his face.

"Maaaan, if I'm gonna be forced into this why don't we get Shikamaru and Ino in on this. Shikamaru is a genius and all he'd probably know what to do. Ino could just be there so I'd have someone to talk to that is not going to go on about Na-" Daiki said before Hinata covered his mouth.

"That's not a bad idea... He does strategy and stuff right? Don't you need to know about how people think and all? He's sure to know how to deal with someone with a god complex..." I said.

"I believe what you are needing is someone who knows the mind, and more specifically Umeko's mind quite well, and frankly I would be happy to apply for the job since I would love to do whatever I can to help Ume-"

"Do you guys hear something?" Naruto asked loudly.

"It's feeling really Shino out here..." Daiki said.

"Let's go get Ino!" Daiki then chanted.

"And Shikamaru!" Sakura said.

"Idiots..." Sasuke said.

"SHUT UP SASUKE!" both Naruto and Daiki yelled.

"SHUT UP NARUTO!" Sakura yelled.

"Naruto! Hey, maybe after this... We should all hang out, you know, like when we were in the Academy..." Hinata said with a red face.

"Yeah, totally!" Naruto exclaimed rubbing the back of his head with a big grin.

"So you're saying that you guys gathered all of us here because you want to give the Christmas spirit to one person..." Shikamaru said.

"Yep!"

"Believe it!"

"Sounds troublesome, I'm gonna go look at clouds..." Shikamaru said about to walk away, when he was yanked back by no other than Ino.

"SHIKAMARU! STOP BEING LAZY AND HELP! SASUKE SAYS THAT HE WANTS TO GET THIS OVER WITH! SO HURRY UP AND THINK OF SOMETHING!" Ino yelled right into the Nara's ear.

Shikamaru grabbed his ringing ear and grumbled, "Troublesome woman..."

"Have you guys thought of asking Makoto? He knows her better than I do and he's pretty good with the mind and stuff..." Shikamaru said, hoping to just throw Makoto under the ninja bus and let him do all the work.

"Who's he?" Naruto asked.

'Oh to hell with it...'

"I've actually been here the entire time..." The rookies heard in their head.

Makoto had his hands in his pockets and looked dully at the group of Genin.

"OH MY GOD! WH-WHA-WHERE THE HELL DID YOU COME FROM! GHOST!?" Naruto yelled.

"He's the dead last of Iruka-sensei's class, right?" Makoto asked.

"Yup." all of the Genin said.

Makoto sighed, "Figures..." he said softly out loud.

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU SAY!?" Naruto yelled.

"F. I. G. U. R. E. S. Hopefully you at least know how to spell." Makoto said, letting his voice echo through everyone's heads.

"How did he just..." Naruto asked.

"It was the ramen button, Naruto. Since if I gave you the real explanation, you'd just get confused." Makoto said.

"Aren't ordinary people just adorable?" Makoto said out loud very softly, yet in a slow raspy tone.

"I'M NOT ORDINARY! I'M THE NEXT HOKAGE THANK YOU VERY MUCH! BELIEVE IT!" Naruto yelled.

"Not believing it..." Makoto mocked.

"I'M GONNA CRUSH YOU!" Naruto said about to lunge at the Yamanaka boy.

"THAT'S IT! WE'RE NOT HERE TO FIGHT IT'S CHRISTMAS! GET IT TOGETHER!" I said punching Naruto into the ground while he was in mid air.

"Now, Shikamaru and Makoto. Put your heads together and think of a plan." I said, happily bossing them around.

"Once you two fail, we can just get Sasuke since we all know he'll come up with the perfect plan!" I said with a blush. Hey, I don't know where you are. But in Konoha, Christmas Eve is super romantic. Couples go out on dates and they exchange presents! It's SO ROMANTIC!

"Ugh, we've been coming up with a plan the whole time... Those of you who know Umeko best will do your best at trying to get her to do Christmas-like things. Take her to get fried chicken, get her under the mistletoe with some guy that she likes, and all that Christmasy stuff. Those that are in charge of doing the actual talking to her is Sakura, Hinata, Naruto, Daiki, then Makoto. The rest of us are there to set up Christmas situations so that she may feel more inclined to get into the spirit of Christmas." Shikamaru said.

Sakura's Try

"Umeko! Umeko!" I yelled running to her.

She was training in Training Ground 4.

"What is it?" she said before doing another punch.

"You know how it's the Christmas season and all and everything... We should totally, uh, go out and um-"

"What the hell are you on about, get to the point!" Umeko yelled punching a tree even harder.

"We should go get a Christmas tree! You know, cut it down decorate it! It'll be fun!" I said with a smile.

Umeko gave an angry look before punching the tree with her infamous Plum Blossom Punch.

The medium sized fir tree fell down.

Umeko instantly ran around and caught it.

"There's the tree. You can go decorate it yourself. I can barely even arrange fuckin' flowers. Now, shoo." she said, setting down the tree.

I sighed and began dragging the tree back to the house.

I passed by the whole Christmas Gang.

"Failed."

"We kind of figured that out, forehead!" Ino exclaimed.

"Shove it, pig!" I said.

"Here let me help you!" Naruto said getting one side of the tree.

"Thanks..." I said.

"Move." Sasuke said motioning for me to give him my side of the tree.

"T-Thanks so much Sasuke!" I said with a red face.

I gave a mocking face to Ino who just growled at me.

"Sasuke get's a blush and a big thanks... All I get is one word... That's totally unfair, believe it." Naruto grumbled.

Hinata's Try

"Christmas sweaters? Christmas sweaters!? Why the hell do I have to go with you to get Christmas sweaters? Why the fuck do I need one!?" Umeko said as her and Hinata walked towards a civilian clothing store.

"Because, there cute and I love wearing them on Ch-Christmas!" Hinata said.

"Man, it's 75 fuckin' degrees, and it's almost Christmas. That's utter bull shit. Why the hell would you wear a sweater in the heat?! Why isn't Christmas tank tops a thing around here. I bet Naruto would love to see you in a tank top or something. Little perverted bastard..." Umeko said.

Hinata's face heated up at the thought of Naruto seeing her in a tank top.

"Wha-what? U-Um! Oh look we're here! Look at the Christmas tree!" Hinata said excitedly, running up to the pine tree.

"Damn, look at them big old balls on that tree. ACDC be damned..." Umeko said pointing at the ornaments. What did you think she was talking about?

Suddenly, they both looked up, and saw Naruto himself was standing on the ceiling holding mistletoe with a goofy grin on his face.

"NARUTO!" Sakura yelled, running after him, on the ceiling as well.

Hinata's red face looked at Umeko who's eyes were shadowed over, and you could see the scowl on her face.

"U-Umeko, we don't have to-"

"Leaving now." Umeko said.

"But-"

"Hilariously derailing parting phrase..." Umeko said before walking away.

Hinata went to where the group was waiting.

"I-I'm sorry... I failed..." Hinata whispered.

"It wasn't your fault, Hinata." Sakura said with a handful of Naruto's hair in her hand.

"Yeah, it was ALL THIS IDIOTS FAULT!" Ino yelled, hitting him on the head.

"Stooooop~ It was just a joke!" Naruto whined.

"It's fine, Naruto." Hinata said softly.

"Thank you!" Naruto said smiling at Hinata.

There little moment was interrupted by Sakura preceding to beat up Naruto.

"Sasuke! Can't you talk some sense into them!?" Naruto shouted.

Sasuke just smirked.

"No." he said.

"SCREW YOU SASUKE!"

'I'm surrounded by idiots...' Makoto thought in a dead pan. Daiki on the other hand was admiring Ino, of course...

Naruto's Try

"Hey, Umeko how-" Naruto was interrupted by an angry pink haired girl with a kunai up to his neck.

"You dare come up to ME ALMIGHTY GOD HERSELF AFTER THE STUNT THAT YOU HAVE PULLED?!" she yelled.

"Uh... Uh... Yes..." Naruto said, completely and utterly confused.

"They'll never find your body." Umeko growled, glaring at him.

Naruto used that time to run away from the very angry Umeko.

"I'M SORRY!"

"FUCK YOUR SORRY!"

Daiki's Try

"So, Umeko, wanna go see a Christmas flick?" Daiki asked.

"Uh, uh... Are you coming on to me?!" Umeko said with a horrified look on her face.

Daiki just turned around, and walked away.

'I'm just gonna try to ask Ino on a date... Again... Probably gonna screw up. Again...' He thought to himself.

"God damn, I swear the men today are fucking insane." Umeko grumbled.

Makoto's Try

"Umeko..." Makoto said, walking up to her.

"Oh great... Another one... What is it, psychopath?" Umeko asked.

"10,000 yen for you to wear an ugly Christmas sweater on Christmas, get your friends and family gifts, and at least look the least bit happy." Makoto said with the money in his hand.

"Bitchin'" Umeko said grabbing the money.

"This will at least make up for some of the money I spent on gifts." Umeko said with the precious money in her hands.

"Wait you already bought gifts?!" Makoto said, completely surprised.

"Yeah... I got them in July before all the prices and shit got jacked up for the damn holiday season." Umeko said.

"Thanks for the cash..." Umeko said, walking away towards the weaponry store.

"WHAT!? YOU'RE TELLING ME THAT SHE GOT GIFTS IN JULY!? THAT'S WHY SHE DIDN'T WANNA GO SHOPPING WITH ME!?" Sakura yelled.

"Wait. Did you just assume that she didn't buy any gifts?" Daiki asked.

"Along with assuming she had little to no Christmas spirit?" Shikamaru asked.

"Well..." Sakura looked at the mixture of emotions that we're shown on her comrade's faces. Some were showing anger that they wasted a day for nothing, others were unreadable.

They soon all went their separate ways.

Christmas soon came and went. And all through Konoha, people were happy and joyous. Many got what they wanted for Christmas. Umeko got coal and some top of the line kunai, and a few small thing just like she wanted. She gave her gifts out all through the city to her different friends.

Dango coupons for Anko.

Ramen for Naruto.

Bracelet for Hinata.

A book on speech for Makoto.

A book on flirting for Daiki.

And Sakura...

"WH-WHAT ARE THESE?!"

"There Sasuke's boxers what do they look like?!"

"How did you?"

"While you guys were on a mission I broke into his house."

"You-You... YOUR THE BEST SISTER EVER!"

"STOP HUGGING ME!"

Cute! I got it done just 20 minutes before Christmas Eve! Just in time! I had no idea where I wanted to go with this chapter so I just did a parody of a Christmas poem then had this little train wreck happen. So, yeah... This is supposed to take place before Chunin Exams, and it's just filler really...

So, Merry Christmas... Happy Hanukkah... Joyous Kwanza... Just, uh Happy Holidays! And if you worship Umeko, Happy Umeko Day! XD

Please send me messages: Um, hi~ So, did you mean that Umeko became too powerful too soon, or was it the updating schedule? I'm sorry I'm easily confused. I'm called Baka-chan for a reason! ^-^

Guest (I really need to find a name for you): I'm glad the chapter wasn't disappointing! And, I feel like more important things happen to Mari once Sasuke leaves the village. So once that comes full circle, then I may include her more.

Umeko: Thank you, Guest! Now, that is what I call a compliment. I give you a five second hug. Have fun with that.

Legendz25: Thanks! Since this fight apparently had hype I was super nervous about it! I was like, 'Oh my god it sucks! The bird sucks! What do I do?! hfodsafjksdf!" XD Yeah, but I'm glad you liked. And thank you for calling me a good writer! It means a lot to me! ^-^

Umeko: Yeah, damn bitch took a pounding...

NoIdea135: God damn... I cannot slip much past you can I? Clever! But I can tell you it you that she does have something in common with Haku and Katara. There's just one thing I'm surprised you didn't mention. Buuuuut, I'm okay with you not getting it yet! And do you want me to give you credit on the Yoshi/Exceed/Pokémon/Digimon thing? Cause I will... You know, if you want... And, the loud screaming is because, I totally was watching some DBZ before writing, and I was listening to the DBZ OST while writing. So, the screaming just came with it...

Umeko: Yeah... Good job, Umeko. Thank you. You were really bad ass! Thank you very much NoIdea135! The compliments that were totally there made me feel great.

dragoncreators: Actually I named the bird Toriyama after Akira Toriyama the mangaka of Dragon Ball Z. And Naruto was based off of DBZ, so I have a lot of respect for the manga and it's creator. That's why I always try to throw in DBZ references since the story was based off of it. And thank you for the compliment! It made me a happy authoress!

Tough chick: I know! But hell, the weird ones are funner than boring ordinary people.

Makoto: 'Funner' is not a word.

Umeko: GET OUT OF MY COMMENT SECTION!

sand-kit (love the name): Whoa, you have a lot going on in your reviews. They were quite enjoyable and different! I love the different kind of people I meet and see in the reviews! Oh, and thank you for the two reviews! It made me happy that you didn't just leave one, you left two! Thanks! ^-^

Umeko: Why thank you very much. I know that I'm awesome, but I still love hearing it from others. I don't get told that as often as I used to. And don't worry about getting my name wrong. There isn't a real definite order. So, yeah. I bestow upon you, the essence of god herself! Now go lift cars! Have fun! Cause chaos. But leave some for me!

bacon of doom: I'm planning on bringing Mari back when Sasuke leaves. Then in the inbetween Part I and Part II filler, I'll have Mari take more of a place in it. And I really hope you liked the fight. But, I doubt it will be their last fight.

demi-lion-ninja-scythe-mage: Thanks I'm glad you liked the fight scene and the mysterious foreshadowing... Wow, I didn't know I was foreshadowing... I thought I was just introducing a new character. Yeah, let's go with foreshadowing! Yeaaaaah~

Himeno Kazehito: What review pauses? AND THANK YOU FOR THE COMPLIMENT!

Lumi Yoshinigama: Your wish is my command~

Six Perfections: Oh my god! Thank you for the five reviews! That was very nice of you and it means a lot! I'm quite grateful! And I'm glad you liked the idea of multiple people being reincarnated in the same universe idea! I just felt like an OC shouldn't be overly special to where she's the only one in the whole universe who knows the future. So, then, I created Yoko (actually I don't think I mentioned she was reincarnated I think I only hinted at it. Oh well), then Mari. And, I would love to read that fic! And pssssssst... Update Walk on the Moon... If possible...

Okay, so you guys remember how last chapter we got to 200 reviews? We're currently at 236 reviews. 236 reviews. If I remember right, we were at 206 last chapter. So that means 30 reviews came in (if my math is right), in ONE CHAPTER! OH MY GOD, I mean, UMEKO! I've told you I love you guys right? So, I'm gonna work on the next chapter as soon as I get this up, and see if I can make this a double update, kay? I'll try. So, remember to review, if it's not too much trouble!