I'm sorry for the delay- I'm trying to write more. And honestly, (I know I keep saying this) I'm trying to finish Feel Good Drag and Uneasy Hearts. But for now, here's this.

Oh and to those kind souls asking if I'm okay, I am(: Just in a big slump right now.

"What the fuck is this?"

"You asked me to make pasta with vodka sauce," Alison says quietly as she stands facing the sink, washing everything she cooked with. But suddenly she feels a heavy weight pressing against her back and she flinches as strong arms grab the plate from her hand and throw it on the ground. The loud shattering sound causes her to jump like a panicked deer.

"Yeah, and this tastes like shit," Wilden growls as he presses her hard against the sink, the counter digging into her torso.

"It tastes like how it always does," Alison argues weakly but it's of no use.

"Shut the fuck up when I'm talking!" Wilden snarls near her ear loudly and she trembles because she can feel his anger radiating violently. And she has no room to move between him and the counter- she has no escape, nowhere to run. "I ask you to do one simple thing and you fuck it up. You fucked it up!"

He yells harshly and backs away as he grabs her arm and spins her around. Her chest rises and falls with each frightened breath she takes, unable to look him straight in the eyes. It's as if he feeds off of her ever increasing fear. It makes her sick to her stomach that he probably feels good about himself after.

"When I tell you to do something, you fucking do it right, is that clear?"

Alison nods pathetically and in one swift move, he grabs the plate with food off the table and hurls it at the wall behind her as the blonde yelps and cowers.

"Fucking answer me!" his voice is loud, like a vicious bark, and it scares the blonde to death to see his face contorted in rage.

"Yes," she whimpers as he threateningly steps towards her. He doesn't stop this time and she closes her eyes and screams.

Alison's eyes shoot open and her breath is caught in her throat as she coughs slightly. She almost feels hung over- her eyes are sore, her throat is unbearably dry, her face feels gross and her hair feels matted to her head. It takes her a moment to calm down, but she soon remembers the room she's in- sweet Emily's. But her head begins to spin, and she realizes how incredibly dehydrated she is.

She's unsure if the sun has risen high or not, because Emily's blackout curtains are pulled shut (and she's grateful, because she doesn't want to face the day yet). The brunette's steady heartbeat calms her down, and she realizes Emily is still fast asleep, and that she is practically on top of the poor girl.

Alison makes a move to shift off of her but realizes that she's being held in place by Emily's arms, and she feels so utterly safe.

"Em," she whispers and her voice is scratchier than she realized. "Emmy."

"Hm," the brunette murmurs sleepily as her eyes flutter open very slowly. It surprises Alison that her own heart still races (under such circumstances) at the sight of Emily's beautiful face.

Emily's grip loosens slightly and her hands soothingly rub Alison's back reflexively.

"I need water," she says quietly as she lifts her head up and then rests it back on her chest.

"I'll get you some," Emily says yawning and makes a move to get up but Alison won't get off of her. She looks at the blonde with a small smile and tries to move again but the blonde still won't budge.

"But I don't want you to get up," she mumbles childishly as she presses her weight down on Emily.

"You should drink water though, you're probably dehydrated," Emily insists.

"You stay here, don't get up, don't leave," Alison warns and she's a little out of it, she knows, because Emily can't really leave…it's her house. But she doesn't want the brunette to move right now, doesn't want the possibility of Emily abandoning her (but deep down she knows she would never).

"Please just stay here," Alison begs and Emily relents and lets go of the blonde. She climbs off and goes to the bathroom and grabs a tall glass of water. Slowly she drinks it, and then refills it before heading back out. Alison won't even look at her self in the mirror right now for fear she'd cringe and hide.

When she walks back out, she sees Emily lying there obediently waiting and she can't get back into bed fast enough.

"Sorry," she says as she crawls under the sheets but Emily guides her so her back is pressed against Emily's front and the brunette has a strong wrap around her.

"You have nothing to be afraid of with me," Emily reassures as she removes any bit of space there was between her and her blonde. And this time, Alison doesn't mind the lack of distance between her body and another.

"I know that," Alison says softly as she holds Emily's hand and shuts her eyes. "I know."

x-x-x

Emily sits at the table eating French toast quietly while casually browsing through a magazine. She's not really reading, and she eyes the blonde who is humming and cleaning up the counter. It makes Emily sigh happily to see that Ali had changed into a pair of her shorts and a t-shirt that are just loose enough to look adorable on her.

Her mind is in a daze, like she can't really fully process everything that was told to her just hours ago. There are too many feelings of anger, fear, sadness, and love- and they overwhelm her completely.

She gets up and goes over to the sink where Alison stands washing dishes quietly, and she stands behind her wrapping her arms around the blonde. Emily feels her tense for a moment before relaxing. Cautiously, she pulls aside the fabric at Ali's shoulder and places her soft lips on her skin and kisses her lightly. It's the only thing she can think to do at this moment.

Alison shudders at the sensation and pauses her movement for a moment.

"Good morning," Emily says softly into her ear before she places a kiss on the sensitive part right behind it.

The blonde turns the water off and turns around while putting her arms around Emily's neck. She leans up to kiss her and for a moment, both their worlds are back to normal.

The kiss is slow and lazy and wonderful, Alison thinks it's just what she needed.

"I feel like we still need to talk," Alison murmurs gently against Emily's lips when they pull apart and the brunette nods.

"Let's get dressed. I wanna show you something."

x-x-x

"Oh my god! Em this place is beautiful," Alison says in awe of their surroundings. Emily can't fight the smile that she wears as she watches Alison stare with her mouth open and blue eyes sparkling with glee.

The two of them stand in a brand new, state-of-the-art commercial kitchen. Alison looks like a child on Christmas who catches Santa sneaking into the house. Emily has taken her to one of the best culinary institutes downtown, and she's enjoying watching the blonde explore the inside.

"You should take classes here, at least for a few months if nothing else."

"Okay as much as I'd love to, because this place is like a fantasy, I can't afford this Emily! And I'm not letting you pay for it," she adds at the end with a warning look towards the brunette.

Emily puts her hands up defensively.

"You can pay for it if you want to. But please hear me out."

Alison looks at her questioningly as she leans against an island counter.

"Aria is dating this guy Ezra, and his family owns The Fitzgerald Hotel downtown," Emily explains. "I know Ezra could get you in to the restaurant to work serving tables. They get at least $150 a night in tips, sometimes two hundred, and I know because I've eaten there before. Not to mention they still get hourly. Would you consider working there? You could afford to take classes here!"

"I couldn't pay my parents back or pay rent on that kind of budget," Alison says hesitatingly though the offer sounds tempting.

"Forget your parents for a moment, they can wait a bit. I was thinking…" Emily struggles to say but can't get the words out.

"What?" Alison asks comfortingly noticing her hesitation. She takes Emily's hand into hers and holds it kindly. "You don't have to be nervous about saying anything."

"I just…I thought…maybe you could…move in," Emily finally says and when Alison doesn't respond right away she quickly adds, "but I thought it might be too soon."

"What if something were to happen Em? What if we get in a fight, what if we get tired of each other? I mean God forbid any of that happen because I don't think I can live without you, but still, it'd be so messy," Alison says gently. Her mind is saying no, but Emily can read that the rest of Alison will give in with a gentle push.

And Emily knows this isn't the wisest option, but she's never been so sure of anything else in her life. It makes her feel disoriented when she thinks about how fast they're moving, but she doesn't know how either of them could slow it down at this point. Of course there is absolutely no need for marriage proposals or anything drastic at the moment, but the two of them could never now just be friends. And she has a feeling that this could really help Alison.

"So it's a bad idea?" Emily asks after a moment of thought and Alison sees the corner of her mouth tugging up into a smile. She remembers their first encounter just last week and their exchange of words about bad ideas.

"It's the worst idea, ever," Alison says with a tiny grin as she shakes her head. "So I guess we should do it. But you better let me help pay rent and all that."

"I wasn't about to let you be a free loader," Emily jokes as Alison gasps with a smile and shoves her lightly. But she knows Emily would have done that for her- she's pretty certain that the brunette will do anything for her. And that thought makes her so damn happy.

x-x

"So you're okay here for a few hours? This meeting won't take long," Emily says as she gets ready in the evening for a dinner with one of her more esteemed professors to discuss a potential internship.

"Yes, Emily, for the sixth time I'm fine," Alison repeats but is only teasing the over careful brunette.

Emily blushes as she puts on her leather jacket and puts her heels on. When she stands up, she sees the blonde's darkened eyes staring at her from the corner of the bed where she's sitting.

"You look so good," Ali says, her voice still raspy and husky from the night before and it makes Emily's core throb. "Don't come home too late and do not let the professor hit on you."

Emily shakes her head with a laugh.

"You won't fall asleep will you?"

"If I do, please, dear god, wake me up," Alison breathes as she licks her lips unconsciously while looking Emily up and down.

Emily lingers by the door and Alison realizes she's waiting for some sort of goodbye. So she gets on up and hops over to the brunette and instead of kissing her, she hugs her tightly, teasing the brunette as she wriggles her body against her torturously.

"Just wait til you come home, Emily Fields."

And wait Emily does. All she can think about during dinner is the multitude of ways she can please Alison. She wants to make the blonde feel loved, but she also wants her to feel alive and happy.

She comes up with more than a few ideas, and she has to cross her legs tightly while chatting with her professor.

But though she is excited, she isn't breaking the law and speeding to get home afterwards- which is why she is caught off guard when she is pulled over.

Emily complies, because, well, maybe she wasn't getting pulled over for a ticket. The officer gets out of the car on the side of the relatively empty city street and walks over to her window with a flashlight. It's painfully bright, and as she lowers the window and squints, he holds it up so as to illuminate her and the inside of the car.

"Good evening," he says to her with a snarky voice and she tries to look at the officer.

"Hey officer, I'm sorry is there a problem?"

"I don't know if you realized it, but you were going over the speed limit quite a bit, my radar said at least 5 miles over."

Emily frowns because she doesn't think she was, she hardly even drives a mile over the speed limit.

(She's a good driver, damnit, and who gets pulled over for going 5 over?)

"License and registration?"

"Sure," she says hastily pulling her wallet out and grabbing the registration from the glove compartment. "But sir I don't believe I was going that fast."

"Not according to my radar. Let me go run these and we'll talk after," he says, the flashlight never lowering. She hands him both and he walks to his car. Emily internally groans and slams her head back. Getting a ticket was quite the mood killer. She almost wishes Ali was here with her because she knows that the blonde could probably flirt their way out of it (and she knows that's a horrible thing to think, but she doesn't worry for a second that Alison could seriously look at someone else the way she looks at Emily).

She looks at her phone to see three texts from the blonde, the first being Come homeee I'm getting tired of being dressed, and then But don't rush! And don't text and drive! And finally, Emmy I'm going to take a bath.

The brunette laughs quietly, happy that the blonde isn't as morose as she was yesterday night. She knows the two still have things to work out and talk about, but the important part is that now there are no secrets, now they can move forward and-

"Here Ms. Fields," the officer walks back without the annoying flashlight and hands her the two items. He flashes her a grin and leans with his arm above the window. Emily can see his face finally- he has a hard jaw and an off-putting smile that makes her uneasy for some reason. "You seem like a nice girl, so I'll let you off with a warning this time. I bet a girl like you has someone waiting at home for her."

"Yeah," she says with a soft smile as she pictures the blonde that has a hold of her heart. He nods at her with an eerie look.

"Thanks Officer-" and her voice dies instantly as she reads his name tag: Wilden.

x-x-x

Emily walks into her apartment in a frenzied state, and she shuts the door behind her and triple locks it. She can faintly hear music playing but she doesn't see the blonde.

"Alison!" she calls as she throws her heels off and puts her jacket on the couch. "Ali where are you?"

There's no answer and she looks around the living room and kitchen for a few seconds with growing panic. Frustrated, she goes over and flings her bedroom door open. There, Alison stands staring at her in surprise in the open bathroom, completely naked, and brushing her hair while listening to the radio. Emily blushes deeply.

"Knock much?"

"Sorry, I thought maybe you left or something," Emily mutters as she looks away.

"I told you I was taking a bath," Alison says softly as she puts the brush down and walks over to her lovely brunette.

"I also told you I was tired of being dressed. So I saved you the trouble, and I didn't put clothes back on," she purrs as she wraps her naked body around Emily and holds her close.

"Alison…" Emily tries to speak but suddenly all thoughts of fear and Wilden and all that were pushed to the back as Ali grabs her hands and places them on her bare ass while she rocks her hips against Emily.

"I think we just need this tonight, don't you?" Alison whispers in her ear huskily and Emily nods furiously as she tells herself she'll deal with the creepy incident tomorrow. The blonde brings her head down to Emily's neck and kisses gently, her soft lips dragging down to the hollow base of her throat and sucking lightly. Emily moans and has to keep herself steady on her feet as her hands grab at Alison's ass, pulling her closer.

"Did you think about me during dinner?" Alison asks as she breathes against Emily's skin.

"Yes," Emily barely manages to get out as the blonde pulls away from her.

"What were you thinking of?" Ali asks as she walks over to the bed and watches Emily's dark eyes follow her.

"Um…I…was…um…" Emily can't speak as she watches the blonde crawl on the bed and lie on her back, arms above her head, and her legs slightly crossed playfully as she bites her lip.

Alison smirks and motions for Emily to come sit next to her. The brunette wastes no time in getting on the bed and hovering over Alison hungrily instead of sitting next to her.

"Wanna know what I was thinking of?"

Emily nods, her eyes roaming up and down Alison- they linger in all the right places.

"Letting you have your way with me while I behaved like a good girl," Alison says in such a sensual, sweet voice that Emily can feel her panties become soaked instantly.

She leans down and lets her lips teasingly hover over Alison's before the blonde reaches up and grabs the back of her head and pulls her down, their lips smashing together and Emily roughly kissing her. As their tongues fight for dominance, Emily drops her thigh down between Ali's legs and the blonde instantly moans and Emily takes the chance to let her tongue sweep the inside of her mouth before pulling back and biting her bottom lip.

Alison is writhing beneath the brunette in pleasure. She begins to feel sensory overload as she thrusts her hip up against Emily's jean clad thigh and the rough denim hitting her sex sends shivers down her spine.

Emily gasps because she can feel how wet Alison is through her jeans. She pulls back and lets a hand roam all the way down from Ali's chest to the dripping slit between her thighs. The brunette moans reverently as her fingers drag teasingly up and down Ali's wet, soft flesh, and the blonde can't take it- she has to feel Emily too. Her hands clumsily grab at Emily's shirt and the brunette laughs softly before helping her pull it off.

"Clothes off, now," Alison demands and Emily raises an eyebrow at her.

"I thought you were going to be a good girl," she teases but Alison thinks it's so incredibly sexy to hear Emily say anything dirty.

"I am being good," she says innocently as she watches Emily pull off the rest of her clothes. When her lovely brunette is no longer hidden by fabric, Alison stares at her longingly with dark, dark eyes.

"You're so fucking beautiful," Alison breathes and her heart is pounding as Emily puts both hands on either side of Alison and presses her weight down against the blonde, attacking her neck with her lips.

She feels Emily's hand land on her breast and feels her nipple being pinched between her thumb and forefinger before Emily rolls it in her fingers. Alison throws her head back in pleasure and whimpers as Emily lets her teeth graze the skin and nips at it while her fingers continue to tease Alison's hardened nipple.

"Please, Em," Alison whimpers as her hips buck up and attempt to create friction against Emily's thigh.

The brunette grins against her neck as she lets her hand drop between her legs, and she begins to thrust easily in and out of Alison with two fingers. Gradually she brings Alison to the edge, and the blonde's body tenses, her muscles tightening and shaking as Emily curls her fingers. A loud moan is ripped from her and she breathes heavily, her mind still in a state of euphoria.

But when Emily tries to kneel backwards and sit up, Alison quickly pulls her down and flips them over so she's on top of her.

"Ali-"

"We're not done yet," Ali murmurs as she runs her hands up and down Emily, loving the shivers she can evoke. The sound of Emily's shallow breaths and tiny whimpers only fuel her need to please the brunette.

She wastes no time in sliding down between her legs and dragging her lips up the side of Emily's trembling thigh before licking long and hard at Emily's dripping slit. It's only a matter of minutes before Emily becomes undone and cums with her hands wrapped up in Alison's hair holding her head to her sex.

When they finish, Alison falls asleep quickly with her head nuzzled into the crook of Emily's neck and the brunette lies wide awake, unable to keep thoughts of Wilden away any more. But she lets herself indulge in Alison's naked body and she eventually falls asleep.

x-x-x

Alison's eyes shoot open in panic early the next morning after a frightening nightmare. Her mind is racing. It's not the first time she's dreamnt of Wilden actually taking advantage of her, but it's definitely no more pleasant now, the ninth time, than any other time. And her panic doesn't die when she realizes she's in bed alone. Her separation anxiety begins to kick in and she jumps up, vulnerable and naked, and throws on a long shirt of Emily's before running out into the living room.

But the worried blonde can't see Emily anywhere, and she runs over to the door and locks it out of fear when she sees the top two locks unlocked (she always has her own door triple locked at home).

"Emily?" she calls out, her voice wavering. "Emily are you here?"

When she receives no answer she goes back into the bedroom and snatches her cell phone up off the ground (they must've knocked it off the table last night) and desperately calls the brunette with shaking hands.

x

"You're one hundred percent positive that was him?"

"Cece it said Wilden on the badge!"

Emily sits at Cece's kitchen counter as the older blonde makes tea for both of them. She is still half asleep since Emily had shown up at six thirty am, apologizing repeatedly but too worried to sleep.

The brunette had been careful not to wake up Alison, and planned to be back before eight thirty when the blonde normally woke up.

She knew which apartment was Cece's, Alison had pointed it out the last time she'd dropped her off. And she knew the older blonde sincerely cared about Ali, so she wanted to know if Cece thought the run in with Wilden was coincidence or something more sinister.

"I mean if you didn't notice him following you beforehand, it was probably a freak coincidence," Cece reassures her. "But that is really fucking creepy considering that you just found out what happened."

"She told me everything, god he's a fucking psycho," Emily breathed angrily.

"He's come around more than once to the strip club," Cece says quietly as she pours tea into cups for both of them. "I've just always got her out without her knowing about it. I don't think he knows she works there, but he does the routine legal checks on it. Anyway the last thing I want is to watch her have a meltdown in that place. You know the last time she saw Wilden, she was crying within seconds of seeing him."

"What do I do? He ran my license, for all I know he could've copied down the address and everything!"

"I thought we just established he wasn't following you beforehand. If that's the case it's no big-"

They're suddenly both distracted by Cece's phone ringing and vibrating. The blonde looks down before she frowns at Emily.

"It's Alison."

She picks up quickly. "Ali?"

Emily watches as Cece's face slips into worry. "Calm down—babe, calm down. Emily's fine—no she did not leave you! Emily's right here—yes hun she's right here—no I didn't take her away—Emily will you please talk to her?"

The brunette snatches the phone worriedly from Cece's outstretched hand and hears Alison's hysterical breathing on the other end.

"Alison, it's me, please calm down," Emily begins.

"Emily, I-I-I woke u-up and you weren't here…" Alison cries on the other end.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't sleep and I didn't want to wake you up," Emily apologizes, feeling terrible for stressing the blonde out like this.

"Wh-h-h-y'd you l-l-l-leave," Alison stutters through hiccups.

"I needed to talk to Cece, I'll leave now and come home so just stay in bed. I'll be home in ten minutes."

"Okay," Alison managed to whimper through soft sobs and Emily feels terrible for just leaving, but she had been so panicked. And now she doesn't know whether or not to tell Alison.

She hangs up and hands the phone back to Cece. "How come she didn't call me?" Emily wonders out loud but looks at her phone and sees seven missed calls from Alison. Oops.

"I'll put the tea in a tumbler, you can give it to her," Cece comments as she rummages through the cabinets. "Chamomile is her favorite. And if I were you, I wouldn't tell her about it yet. She'll go absolutely hysterical."

"I never knew she was hurting this bad," Emily shakes her head and leans on the counter tiredly.

"I didn't know what else to do, I'm not a certified fuckin therapist," Cece shrugs. "So I taught her how to be a fucking strong, tough bitch. But that didn't fix anything. And that's the best I could do. And then you came, and I knew you could do things for her that I could never."

"You're still a good friend," Emily says with a small smile. "I'm sorry I woke you up so early. And I'm sorry I have to run."

"It's okay. It's for Ali. And I'd do anything for that little bitch," Cece says with a grin. "Put my number in your phone. And call me if you need anything okay?"

"Alright," Emily says pulling out her phone.

"Take care of Alison. And take care of yourself too."

X

"Ali!"

Emily kicks her shoes off as soon as she shuts her door and locks it, and then she makes a beeline for her bedroom. She goes in and finds Alison with the sheets pulled up around her tightly and Emily can see her figure shaking through the blankets.

"I brought you tea," Emily tries to say with a smile but she sees Alison looking at her through hurt eyes.

"Why'd you leave? And go to Cece?" she asks in a raspy, tired voice as she stares at Emily.

"I couldn't sleep," Emily sighs.

"So you went to Cece?!" Alison's voice almost screeches and Emily opens her mouth to explain but Alison shrinks under the blankets. "You left me-"

"Obviously it wasn't like that," Emily gasps horrified that Alison would even insinuate that. "I would never do that to you."

Alison doesn't reply and lies still, under the sheets.

"Cece made you tea. She said it's chamomile, your favorite."

Alison looks warily at her before she gradually sits up and wraps the covers around her. Emily hands her the tumbler and lets her drink for a few minutes in silence and calm down. She gradually puts her hand on Alison's knee and considers it a victory when the blonde doesn't flinch or pull away.

"I'm sorry," Emily says quietly as she looks carefully at Alison and watches the blonde's face finally soften a bit. The hollow look has left her eyes and she looks more awake, more present.

"I know, I'm sorry," Ali sighs and holds her head in her hands. "I hate being so vulnerable like that."

And it's true- Alison has never let herself open up like that to anybody. She hardly let Cece see her cry, because the older blonde would tell her that crying didn't truly fix anything. The last time Alison had opened up to someone fully (before Cece) had been with Wilden, and she swore she'd never let herself be weak like that ever here she was, exposing her soul to a girl she's known for not even two weeks- and she can't help it, she's terrified that Emily will leave her, and indadvertedly hurt her in the process.

She doesn't believe Emily would intentionally hurt her, but she also believes that she isn't good enough. And it's like it's programmed in her head for her to never fully be able to trust anyone ever again. And she hates that.

"No don't be sorry, it's okay. I think you've held it in for so long and now it's just weird for you to finally let it out. "

"But you weren't…you know…with Cece…"

"Alison!"

"Just checking," she says sheepishly and looks down as she sips from her tumbler. When she looks back up she sees Emily giving her an incredulous stare. "Cece's hot! I don't know."

"It's just you Alison, I just want you," Emily reassures her as she kisses her forehead.

"I know," she repeats, her voice cracking as she speaks and she finally wraps her arms around Emily and hugs her tightly. "I feel like I've known you my entire life."

Emily smiles, and she loves the way Alison breathes her in- she can feel the blonde relaxing as she inhales her scent. She squirms out of the hug and kisses Alison lightly on the lips. "I know."

Meep. For those of you who like to review, it truly makes me smile. And I mean to reply to them, because like I always say, I super appreciate hearing all your thoughts- they make my shitty days less shitty. Thank you for reading! I hope you all have lovely days.