Part Twenty-Two: Because of You

He almost fucking got himself killed. Who the fuck comes into the middle of a drug deal unarmed? I had to protect his freckled ass. What the fuck is wrong with him? That guy had a gun pointed at him. He's one of my regulars. He would have shot him if I hadn't stepped in.

What if I hadn't been there and he came looking for me? They would have definitely killed him. An unarmed white boy entering the worst part of Chicago in the middle of the day who isn't a cop or a crack head spells dead meat.

I'm glad I was there. I'm glad my gun was loaded. I'm glad I didn't have to shoot anyone. Fuck. He's not only going to get himself killed he's going to get me killed. Here I am feeling fucking awful for making him mad then he goes and puts himself in danger.

I can barely stand to look at him without feeling anxious. I feel like someone's going to burst in that door any minute and pull a gun on him. Linda still has the gun behind the counter. If someone does try something hopefully he'll think to fucking grab it.

The door swings open and my heart lodges in my chest. It's only Officer Tony. He doesn't really look at me. We're not exactly best friends. I've seen the backseat of his squad car one too many times.

"Hey, Ian," says Tony.

"Tony," says Gallagher. He seems to be staring at Officer Tony a lot. He's not that good looking. The door opens again. My heart tightens in my chest. It's only a woman and small child.

"What the fuck were you doing in that neighborhood yesterday?"

"I was meeting up with Mickey," says Gallagher.

"After we got ice cream, I told you not to stay. You disobeyed me."

They got ice cream together? That sounds like a date.

"Relax. I wasn't hurt."

"But you could have been. You know where I was going when I passed you two on the street? There was a drive by. Those places are dangerous, Ian."

"Did you come in here to lecture me?"

"No. I actually came into to ask you if you found an answer to your question. The lecture just kind of flew out of my mouth."

"Well I didn't. I decided not to worry about it right now."

"Well, I'm sorry I couldn't help you. And stay out of those areas, Ian. I don't want to want to make that visit to Fiona."

"Got it," says Gallagher.

I watch his eyes lock on to Tony's ass as he leaves the store. Gallagher sighs and rings up the woman and her damn brat who keeps trying to pocket Tootsie Rolls. I let him sneak one. I put my finger to my lips and he smiles.

"He's right," I say when they're gone. Gallagher by passes me and locks the door behind them. He takes my hand and leads me to the coolers. I know where this is going. He starts stripping me and before I can stop myself I am helping him out of his clothes. "Wait. I need to talk to you."

"It can wait."

"No it fucking can't. We've been doing things your way this whole fucking time. Stop for just one fucking second and listen to me."

"I'm listening."

"You can't go putting yourself in danger like that, Gallagher. What if I wasn't there to protect you? You would have died. Are you even fucking listening to me?"

"Forgive me for wanting to see you yesterday."

"Don't you fucking dare turn this around. I'm supposed to be mad at you."

"I can make it up to you," Gallagher says grabbing me and turning me around. I let him have his way. God, it feels good. We haven't fucked in over week. His hands feel soft against my hips. I respond to him and give in to him.

"Hello, boys," says Frank Gallagher staring at us.

"Fuck," I put on all my clothes. He has to ruin everything.

Frank takes money out of the register. He leaves and I look at Gallagher. He's wearing a puppy look on his face. How the fuck is he so calm about this? First he nearly dies then his fucking father walks in on us. Worst fucking week of my life.

"Fuck. We gotta kill him." A woman knocks on the store door. "Fuck off. No one will miss him anyway. We shoot him in the head and dump him in the river."

"He has a lousy short term memory. He's probably forgotten already."

"We can't chance that."

"I'll talk to him."

"Cut his hands off, pull his teeth. He can't even be identified."

"Don't worry about it, Mickey. He won't tell."

But I am fucking worried. What if my dad finds out? He will actually kill me. I have to find Frank and kill him. That's the only way. I leave Gallagher in the store. The man hunt for Frank begins. I should never have let it get this far. It should have ended when I went to juvie. I should have quit then.

Frank is a difficult man to track down. I go to Sheila's, the Gallagher house, and the Alibi. He's ducking me. Gallagher fucking warned him. He got to him first. Fuck.

I find Gallagher where I left him, at Kash 'N' Grab. He's smoking near the delivery entrance. I have to make him understand.

"Where the fuck is he?"

"I don't know."

"Bull shit. I can't believe you fucking warned him."

"I hate him more than you do."

I open the cash register and take some money out. I don't take all of it just what I earned this week. Gallagher is still looking at me like a lost fucking puppy. It's gone too far. This ends now.

"I'm done. I'm done with this job. I'm done with you. Just fucking done."

"Frank has walked in on Fiona and all of her boyfriends, walked in on Lip and his girls. We've got nothing to be ashamed of."

"What fucking world do you live in?"

"You can't. I don't want you to." He tries to touch me. I back off.

"What the fuck did I just say to you? Done is done. We're not boyfriend and girlfriend here. You're nothing but a warm mouth to me."

He looks like he's about to cry. I walk out the door. When I get away a few blocks I drop to my knees. I can't take it anymore. He almost died yesterday because of me. It's better this way. We're better off apart. I'm sorry.

I have one option left for me. If I can't kill Frank and I can't be around Gallagher, there is only one thing I can do. I walk down the street until I find a cop. Punching a cop gets me six months. It violates my probation. Well, Ryan, your cellmate is coming back.

A/N: This chapter was difficult to write because it's kind of sudden and fast, but I wanted to get Mickey back into juvie. I took some dialogue from the show and chopped it up and stuck it in here. I didn't want to use it verbatim, but I wanted some of it. Happy Election Day everyone! Vote if you're old enough.