A/N: Hello everyone! I apologize profusely for my extreme delay in updating this story - but I did graduate college, woohoo! There's just been a lot of life stuff going on so I decided to no longer commit to updating on any certain story for any certain day, but know that I'm always trying to write and I haven't abandoned this story, or Refuge.
Thank you to everyone who has reviewed lately. All your kind words always push me to focus and write faster. Also, I'm flattered to learn that my stories are recommended on twitter/tumblr.
And many thanks to TGHall for kicking my ass, getting me to write this, and for co-writing this chapter. She started out coming to me for help and has turned into one of my biggest helps in writing right now. We have a a very cool and really, really dark emison story coming but it's literally so thrilling and full of ups & downs that it's been my favorite story to write so far. I'm only going to post it when it's 75% done because we don't want people to be having to wait long to read the installments.
Enjoy!
x-x-x
To say the silence in the car is awkward is an understatement. Emily wishes she could evaporate into thin air. She hates the way she can feel discomfort rolling off of Alison in waves, but she knows she can't do anything about it. Part of her is afraid Alison will snap any moment if she says one word.
The brunette can't wrap her mind around it—how could she have thought for one moment that someone else was her girlfriend? It's a little mind blowing for her to grasp the concept that there is literally a physical replica of her girlfriend. There's a surge of guilt that passes through Emily as she thinks about how Courtney kissed just as skillfully as Alison.
"Ali," Emily starts and watches as Alison tenses up instantly in the passenger seat. Her jawline is hard and defiant as she stares out the window and Emily tries to make her voice as soft and earnest as possible. "I'm sorry-"
"It's fine," Alison dismisses her mid apology and Emily frowns. She knows Alison is anything but fine.
"No, you're upset," Emily argues quietly and Alison scoffs.
"Really, I'm fine," Ali says through gritted teeth. "It's not like I'm mad at you."
"I didn't know it was her obviously."
"Of course you didn't," Ali tries to say patiently but her raging irritation begins to show through.
Emily doesn't know what else to say so she quietly drops it but Alison's piercing blue eyes look at her for a long moment before darting back out the window.
"Now what are you thinking?" Emily asks quietly and Alison merely shrugs.
The dead silence continues but Alison feels the annoyance grow like an out of control fire inside her. She can feel herself getting more and more worked up with every second that passes by. She would be able to tell Emily apart from anyone else in the world. The brunette has been so removed lately, what if she has drifted away from the blonde?
And here she is being a goddamn fool, Alison thinks, for being so blindly in love with Emily who can't tell the difference between her and her psychotic twin who is nothing like her.
Her sharp, momentarily mistrusting eyes gaze at Emily who is staring straight ahead at the road. She takes in the brunette's beauty and for a brief moment her anger is quelled and she breathes a little sigh of relief at the innocence and sincerity that is Emily. Alison wonders for the thousandth time how Emily could possibly love someone as damaged and flawed as her.
And that's when the jealousy, the anger, the bitterness inside Alison mixes with the fear and lust brewing in her veins. She can't stand the thought of losing control, of losing Emily. Because as unhealthy and toxic as it is, without Emily she isn't sure she has anything.
"Stop the car," Alison mumbles under her breath as she tries to take deep breaths.
"What? Why?" Emily asks, her brows crinkling as she tries to look at the blonde with concern. Alison feels a need that she isn't sure is good rush through her as Emily bites her lip nervously.
"You know what I'm thinking?" Alison angrily hisses before she can stop herself. Her temper rarely flares like this but- "I'm thinking she must be a better kisser."
"Ali I didn't-"
"Pull over, now," Ali insists but she sounds less demanding and more desperate.
"It's a freeway-"
"Fuck, Em, pull over!" Alison shouts and the startled brunette quickly swerves over to the right. She hasn't heard Alison yell at her like that since that moment after Cece died.
"Okay," Emily meekly says as she slows down and stops on the side of the road and Alison flings the door open. Before the car has even come to a complete stop on the shoulder of the busy road Alison is out of her seat and slamming the door closed. Emily blinks and then throws off her seatbelt hurriedly. She waits for a gap in the traffic before hopping out, and by the time she gets out of the car and around to the shoulder Alison is holding her head in clear agony.
"Why?" Alison groans rubbing at her face as though she can wash away the memory of Emily squirming with Courtney pressed tightly against her. "Why would you fucking do that?"
Emily blinks, stunned. She's unsure as to whether Ali actually wants an answer or just wants to rant her feelings, so the brunette stays silent waiting for more instructions or thoughts. The guilt swirling in the pit of her stomach is consuming and her mental freak out increases tenfold.
Alison kicks at some of the gravel, huffing as slides her hands into her own hair with frustration. She just wants to kill Courtney. That's all. Her twin's sick satisfied smirk is as etched into Alison's brain as the sight of Courtney's lips on Emily.
"You kissed her back," Alison whimpers softly, hurt lacing her voice as she begins to shake. She feels like she's going to throw up.
Emily watches on helplessly, at a loss for words.
"I didn't-"
"You did," Alison cuts in firmly with hurt flashing in those baby blue eyes as she dares to face Emily and make eye contact. She fiercely takes a step towards Emily. "You kissed her back. How could you not tell the difference!"
"You're identical and-" Emily tries to explain herself but Alison won't hear any of it.
"She's a psychopath," Alison says loudly shaking with rage as her voice cracks with pain. "And I want to kill her. Fuck, this is so fucked up."
"Ali we can-"
"What Em? What can we fucking do?" Alison asks incredulously as she runs a hand through her hair. "How could you think I would even want to do that at my parents place?"
Emily is dumbfounded and speechless because now that its been pointed out, it doesn't make any sense. Alison wanted to reconnect with her parents, wanted to introduce Emily to them on the best terms possible—dragging Emily back to her car to fuck her is completely out of character for Alison, and Emily should have picked up on that. She drops her head in shame, that constant guilt making her sick. Hindsight is twenty/twenty, but she doubts Alison will really listen to her right now.
"Am I that much of a slut to you?" Alison's voice wavers, taking on a completely different tone. Her aggression is crumbling, and Emily is starting to see the vulnerable, weak Alison that rarely surfaces unless her self esteem disappears and is replaced by an intense fear.
"What?" Emily gasps, horrified that her train of thought is leading to this. "Ali, no—you know I always want you! I…I just thought you were just needing a stress relief, I love you-"
"Don't!" Alison pleads painfully as she brings her hands up to her head. "Please don't you dare say you love me right now."
Emily feels like a kicked puppy as Alison sinks into a crouch, wrapping her arms around her knees and curling into herself.
"Ali," Emily timidly says as she edges closer to her girlfriend. Alison buries her head in her arms, her whole body shaking as she tries to steady her breathing through her little uncontrollable cries.
"How could you even love me?" Alison asks quietly through her tears, her voice hoarse and broken.
Emily slides to her knees next to Alison and pulls the blonde into her arms, Alison wriggles a bit but doesn't put up much of a fight and Emily cradles the blonde to her chest.
"I do love you," Emily promises sincerely but this time it's not necessarily making Alison feel completely better. "Only you."
Alison hiccups as she tries to even her breathing. Only now does Emily notice that Hanna and the others have stopped on the freeway a distance behind them, watching carefully from the car.
She sighs knowing she's going to have to deal with more aftermath later.
x-x-x
Emily skitters into their townhouse after Alison briskly walks inside. The rest of the car ride home had been even worse—the silence had been thick with frustration and unspoken words. She sees that Alison has made a beeline for their bedroom so the brunette sighs and slowly takes off her shoes and jacket before heading that way too. She takes her time and delays the inevitable argument she believes is about to ensue. Her mind is overtaken with thoughts and it's a minute or two before she makes it to their room.
But the moment she enters her bedroom she can sense Alison's eyes watching her as the blonde emerges from the bathroom. She's barely clad in a sleeping shirt of Emily's and black panties. Her one eyebrow raises as she looks at her flustered girlfriend.
"What took you so long?" she asks dryly as her eyes roam over the brunette and before Emily can answer, Alison is in front of her in two long strides. The blonde grabs Emily's face and crashes their lips together, hungrily moving hers against Emily's as her hands slide into the long brown locks and grip harshly. Emily whimpers into the kiss as Alison snakes her tongue into her mouth and maneuvers it in a way that has Emily's knees faltering and her breathing affected.
"F-f-uck," Emily stammers as she breaks the kiss but Alison's lips attach to her neck quickly, sucking and nipping at the skin there. As Emily tries to speak again, the blonde bites a bit harder causing Emily to gasp loudly before Alison soothes it with her tongue. "We need to talk."
Alison pulls away from Emily with a raised eyebrow. She swiftly pulls off her sleeping shirt and throws it aside harshly, staring at Emily with a possessive look in her eye. The brunette gulps at the sight of Alison's toned, naked upper body and her eyes rake upwards from her panties to her perky breasts before meeting the fierce cerulean eyes fixed upon her.
"Later," Alison murmurs darkly as she steps into Emily and presses her bare body against the brunette who shudders at Ali's touch. The blonde wastes no time in pulling off Emily's top as well, leaving her tanned skin girlfriend in just a bra. She brings her lips to Emily's neck and the brunette automatically tilts her head to offer more access which Alison takes. She sucks hard at the base of Emily's neck and brings one of her hands up to palm Emily's right breast over her bra while she marks her with her mouth.
The moan that spills from Emily's lips is all that Alison wants to hear right now, but as she kisses her way down to between Emily's breasts and moves her hand around to the bra clasp, she hears Emily begin to speak again.
"Maybe we should-"
"Shut up Em," Alison says in a husky, dark voice as she skillfully unclasps Emily's bra and pulls it off in one smooth motion. She wastes no time in bringing her lips to tease the brunette's left nipple, smirking as Emily whimpers and arches into Ali. The blonde uses her hand to tease Emily's other nipple, rolling it and pinching it until the brunette is moaning loudly. She can't wait to feel how wet Emily is.
"Ali," Emily moans breathily as Alison continues to tease her and pushes her roughly against the nearest wall.
"Mine," Alison breathes out as she goes up to kiss Emily possessively, craving the control that she feels slipping away from her.
Emily knows that this is all about jealousy and Alison's need to prove to herself that Emily is hers and hers alone. And as much as Emily doesn't want to feel like a possession, she doesn't know how else to let Alison vent her frustrations right now. And she'd be lying if she said she wasn't the slightest bit turned on.
"Yours," Emily whispers.
Alison pulls away sharply, certain she misheard.
"Yours," Emily proclaims louder, grabbing Alison by the back of the neck and crashing their mouths together.
But the thought does cross her mind as Alison's hands dominatingly roam up and down her body that this is not the way to fix things- this isn't how it should be handled. This is toxic, this is how relationships fall apart- when Alison lets her fear control her, and Emily can't push for the healthy alternative.
Ali is not the only one hurting from what happened to Courtney, not the only one who was betrayed and Emily channels her own rage into dominating Alison's mouth. She pushes her fears, her guilt to the side and focuses on her desire, desire to sedate Alison's needs however misplaced they may be.
Alison's bites at Emily's lip painfully breaking the skin and then soothes the sting with her tongue, the metallic taste makes Emily shiver as Alison's tongue pillages her mouth. The brunette can't think straight when Alison's hands are shoving her pants and panties to the ground and settling between her thighs.
The blonde feels a slick heat as her fingers swipe through Emily's folds and her fingers are instantly covered in Emily because the brunette is just so incredibly wet. She watches the way the brunette closes her eyes and moans, throwing her head backwards.
"Oh god, Ali," Emily groans encouragingly, subtly jerking against Alison's hand trying to gain more friction in her desperate need.
Alison smirks and then has to do a mental double-take as the image of Courtney rubbing Emily through her jeans reappears in her mind. She tries to shake it off, but the visual is almost tangible and she feels herself spiraling- all she can think of is how Courtney took away the sanctity of the one person who was truly only Alison's. And the thought drives Alison crazy.
Emily gasps loudly as Alison plunges two fingers into her roughly, and the slight pain subsides as the blonde slows down and begins to find a rhythm that has Emily rocking her hips in an attempt to drive Ali's fingers deeper.
"Please," Emily whimpers as Alison slows down, her frustration reaching it's peak. She needs a release but she also needs to feel Emily is hers.
"Say my name," Ali growls lowly in Emily's ear and it sends shivers down the brunette's spine as she feels teeth pull at her earlobe.
"Ali, please," Emily moans and her fingers begin to pump harder. Ali knows that Emily is close by the way her body spasms more and more.
"Who do you belong with?" Alison demands in a low voice and Emily blinks at the question. "Who?"
"F-f-fuck…You, Ali, you," Emily cries as Alison slams her fingers into Emily and uses her free hand to tease her nipple. She brings the brunette to her climax and Emily shudders violently under her, a string of profanities leaving the brunette's mouth as Alison feels her fingers become utterly covered in Emily.
She feels Emily gasp slightly and sigh as she removes her fingers and she feels accomplished, she feels reassured. But as she looks at Emily's exhausted form slumped against the wall, sweaty and naked and vulnerable, she suddenly feels empty inside. And she doesn't want to keep feeling this way.
Emily tries to make her jelly like limps grab for Alison as she sees the fear equate to fleeing but she can't muster the strength as Alison heads for the bathroom.
"Fuck," Emily curses quietly only imaging what Ali is now putting herself through.
x-x-x
The blonde quickly escaped to the shower after senselessly fucking Emily. She tries to close her eyes and let the hot water wash over her and rid her of the day's troubles. As she tries to inhale and exhale softly and practice proper breathing techniques, she hears the door creak.
"Ali?" she hears a soft voice call in and her heart instantly softens at the innocence entwined with it. "I'm coming in."
The blonde doesn't say a word in response, merely waiting for her girlfriend. But when Emily pushes back the shower curtain and is standing there totally naked, hesitancy written across her face, Alison tries to nod at her and the brunette takes that as an invitation.
The shower is the only noise that Ali can fathom as she watches her gorgeous, toned girlfriend lean in and kiss her before stepping in. She can't take her eyes off of Emily's naturally wonderful curves—her eyes flicker and hover over her chest and between her thighs.
"I don't think I can go another round right now," Emily mumbles shyly, trying to force a small smile but Alison can see right past it. She can see the etched lines of worry and stress in Emily's face and she wonders suddenly if she had pushed the brunette too far just now. Alison is caught off guard as Emily gently spins her around to face the spray. "Here, let me help you."
The blonde succumbs to Emily's gentle touch as she feels the brunette's fingers lather shampoo into her hair and gently massage her scalp. She sighs a bit as she lets Emily's little ministrations really soothe her until she feels the brunette's body pressed against her and she relaxes into it.
Emily's strong hands continue to help wash Ali's hair and once all the soap is out, they continue to her shoulders and give her a much needed back massage. The blonde groans appreciatively, and after a while she turns and pushes Emily back as she removes them from the direct spray of the shower. The water continues to hit her back but she gently tucks a piece of hair behind Emily's ear.
"I'm sorry," Alison mutters, guilt eating into her—here is this perfect angel of a girl, one Ali thinks doesn't and probably never will deserve. She has done literally nothing but take care of Alison and her endless insecurities. "You shouldn't have to put up with-"
Emily cups Alison's cheek tenderly, her thumb settling on Alison's lips gently.
"I don't put up with you, Ali, I love you," Emily promises sweetly.
Alison closes her eyes tightly at the proclamation, it shouldn't sting but it does because that wasn't love minutes before in the bedroom. No, that wasn't devotion or sweet passion—it was raw and aggressive and Ali never should have done it. The lack of control she exhibited and her overwhelming securities must have affected Emily poorly.
"Please forgive me," Alison whispers eyes scrunched closed as she leans into Emily's shoulder, burying her head in Emily's skin because even in the height of a fight Emily is her safe place.
Emily's hands settle on her back and on her neck, massaging firmly as Emily cradles Alison to her body.
"There is nothing to forgive," Emily assures her lover with a gentle kiss to the top of her head. "You should be forgiving me."
Alison pulls back sharply, the mental image of Courtney and Emily resurfacing yet again. But this time there's a twinge of intense guilt at what she just did—using Emily for her own needs. What made her any better than Paige? Or Wilden? The thought of becoming those people makes Alison sick and she swears to god she'd rather die than become that type of monster to Emily.
"Or not," Emily gulps as a dangerous fire builds in Alison's eyes. "We don't have to figure this all out right now, Ali, we're not… breaking up."
"God no, please," Alison desperately responds, the thought of breaking up, of losing Emily is almost too overwhelming. Alison feels her throat constrict painfully at the very thought.
"No, hey," Emily calls out softly, grasping Alison's face in her hands. The signs of Ali's impending panic attack are obvious. "Come back to me, Ali, we're not breaking up, I promise."
Alison gulps in air as Emily holds her gaze steadily. She nods vigorously and Emily sighs relieved, holding her tightly and comforting her. The two of them gradually finish and make their way to bed, tangled up in each other in a comfy, safe slumber.
x-x-x
"Wake up babe," Alison hears the next morning as she struggles to open her eyes.
"Hmm?" Ali mumbles incoherently. She blinks a few times and sees Emily standing by the bedside, tray in hand with a plate of pancakes and blueberries along with a fresh smoothie. "Baby what time is it?"
The brunette chuckles at Alison's husky, sleepy voice and the goofy grin spread across the blonde's face.
"Eight," Emily murmurs quietly.
"Eight?" Alison asks a little bit more awake now as she sits up sharply. "You need to go to work!"
"I decided to go in late today," Emily shrugs lightheartedly as she presses a chaste kiss to Alison's lips and sets the tray down on her bedside. "I wanted to spend time with you."
Even though she knew Alison felt guilty, she couldn't help but feel guilty for her stupid mistake yesterday. Even Hanna had scolded her through texts last night and the brunette truly felt bad for her fuck up.
"But your work-"
"Isn't as important as you," Emily replies sweetly.
"No, but it does put a roof over our head," Alison teases as her sleepy voice cracks with amusement.
"I just said I felt sick, they can't get mad at me for coming in late if I felt nauseous," Emily says casually. "Now eat, or do I have to force feed you?"
"Alright alright I'll eat my girlfriend's delicious cooking," Alison says but she gives Emily a small smile quickly and uses both hands to cup her cheeks as she kisses her. "I am so lucky to have you."
"And I'm lucky to have you," Emily quips back gently, shyly tilting her head. "Now tell me you love me."
The tiny bit of apprehension behind Emily's words doesn't escape the blonde and she's well aware that Emily tried to tell her she loved her twice yesterday to no avail.
"I," Alison pauses for dramatic affect and feels her heart melt at the way Emily looks at her expectantly with so much hope and trust. "I love you to the moon and back, Emily Fields. I promise to love you even if I can't find it in me to love anyone or anything else."
Emily grins so widely that she thinks her face is going to break. Alison giggles softly and kisses her again. It's one of those lazy kisses that Emily could get lost in, and she finds her head spinning as the blonde pulls away.
"I love you too," Emily whispers as she crawls back on the bed beside Alison.
The blonde smiles at her affectionately with an infectious loving look in her eyes. "I know you do."
x-x-x
"It just doesn't seem like an easy mistake," Spencer scolds as Emily sits at The Brew with her three friends around her. They wanted to meet for coffee to check on the two after the disaster yesterday, but Alison had to pick up a shift so Emily was stuck being interrogated alone.
"Spence she clearly feels bad," Aria cuts in softly, coming to Emily's defense as the poor brunette sits there silently.
"To be fair, they're like creepy identical," Hanna throws her two cents in. "But seriously there's just this aura around Courtney that's creepy. And do you really think Ali would drag you to your car to fuck you? I know you guys are like fucking energizer bunnies but—"
"I know!" Emily interrupts, frustrated with herself enough without having to listen to the rest of them guilt trip her. "I realize now that it makes no sense for Alison to have wanted to do that while at her parents house. I was really tired, and I wasn't thinking, and now Ali's forever going to remember me unknowingly making out with her sister and I don't know what to do about it!"
She lets out a frustrated grunt as she clenches her fists and the other three look at her in surprise. They rarely see Emily get so worked up so quickly.
"There's not much you can do…" Spencer starts cautiously.
"Just don't go around making out with anyone else again and you're fine," Hanna brushes it off.
"It'll be okay," Aria pats Emily's leg sympathetically and looks at her warmly. "Ali will let it go because it was a mistake, and that's all. You didn't know, Em."
"I don't plan on talking to Courtney or being around her any time soon," the brunette huffs.
"But if you are…if Alison drags you back to that psycho house…make her get a tattoo or something so you know it's her," Hanna says so matter of factly with a smile that Emily laughs a little.
"What was it like in there?" Emily asks, realizing that she and Alison haven't even discussed how the reunion with her parents went.
"Imagine my parents' bluntness and brash attitudes, multiplied by a hundred," Spencer grimly tells her.
"Seriously, the moment they stepped in they said 'Hi Alison- who are all these people?'" Hanna notes as she remembers the chills that ran down her spine with their icy looks.
"They weren't even happy to see her?" Emily asks sadly, taking a sip of her coffee.
"They were as fake as Noel Kahn's college girlfriend's tits," Hanna quips and Emily almost spits her coffee out with laughter.
"Seriously," Aria adds. "They just wanted her to come home and help support them. They're very controlling and manipulative though—it's like they said everything they knew would make her feel bad while trying to hide the fact they were guilt tripping her."
"And then she came out and told them she was living with her girlfriend," Hanna tells her. "Oh you should've seen their faces. They thought for a moment that Cece was her girlfriend."
"Yeah until Courtney chimed in with 'not her, she's dead'," Aria remembers.
"How would Courtney know that if she's been locked up in an institution?" Emily questions.
"The Wilden/Alison case isn't private information," Spencer answers quietly. "I bet she did her research on Alison. There's something really unpleasant about Courtney but also really intelligent."
"I'm not letting her give a penny back to her parents," Emily seethes as she thinks of the way Alison has suffered enough without them caring for her. "Or take Courtney's abuse."
"Probably best she just stays away from her family," Hanna says thoughtfully.
Emily just nods. "Probably."
x-x-x
Towards the end of the night, Alison is cleaning down a table when a shiver creeps up her spine, like there is something wrong with the air. She tries to finish wiping down the table quickly so she can take a break in the back but this table is a mess.
"Sure she's over here," Ali hears her boss, Zack, answer to someone and she can only assume they're speaking about her as there's no one else in this direction.
Alison cleans more furiously certain that if it were Emily or any one of her friends they would have wandered over by now. Whoever is looking for Ali is not someone she wants to talk to, the blonde is sure of that. She's in a bad mood and just wants to go home to Emily or meet up with the girls for coffee if they were still out.
She hears footsteps and her boss' voice behind her. She turns only to freeze at the sight.
"You didn't tell me you had a sister, Alison," Zack says and smiles as Alison straightens up with disgust running through her. Standing next to him is Courtney looking more demure than Ali has ever seen her.
"I don't have a sister," Alison snaps harsher than she intends and he looks a little taken back by the hostility. "Sorry, Zack, we…we're estranged."
She glares at Courtney who avoids eye contact. He nods and bounces uncomfortably on the balls of his feet and Ali swears she sees him blatantly checking out her sister.
"Well you're welcome to get destranged—you can take your break if you like," he tells her and smiles encouragingly.
Alison knows he's trying to help but she wants to scream and smack him so hard right now. She doesn't want to take her break and listen to all the bullshit Courtney is likely to spew.
She is already reeling from this very brief encounter, and now all she wants to do is go home and have Emily writhing beneath her while she bites Emily's neck, marking what is hers because Courtney brings out her petty, controlling jealous side. It sickens her that she wants to use Emily like that to make herself feel whole, feel secure—but its a reality that she needs to find a way to manage and remedy.
"Please?" Courtney asks with a small hopeful smile that Alison can see right past. Ali can see her boss is just eating all of this up.
"Fifteen minutes," Alison sighs picking up her cleaning rag and heading for the kitchen.
Courtney trails along behind her, and Alison ignores all her coworkers' questions about her twin as she pushes past the wait staff and kitchen staff until they burst out into the back alley behind the restaurant.
"Talk," Alison commands whirling on her twin the instant the door slams shut.
They are thankfully alone because Ali doesn't think she could handle an audience right now. She's a mixture of angry and fearful and she's so unstable she's worried about her own ability to stay cool.
"I wanted to tell you I'm sorry for how I acted," Courtney looks to the cement as she talks and Alison clenches her fists in anger.
"And that makes it better," Alison argues, wishing Courtney would look at her so she can see the deceptive look in her eye. "You say sorry and its all magically forgiven? You tricked my girlfriend into kissing you by pretending to be me!"
"I was just playing and-"
"Playing?" Alison asks, her voice rising an octave and cracking. "No, I saw your face when I caught you. You're trying to claim it was all a little joke and I'm blowing it up?"
"No," Courtney shakes her head as she looks up her blue eyes identical to Alison's are shining with unshed tears. "I never meant to hurt you, you know how Mom and Dad can be about-"
"Don't blame this on them," Alison commands. "This has nothing to do with them. You betrayed me and threatened my relationship with Emily and who knows what would have happened if I didn't stop you. I'm not going to just forgive and forget-"
"I don't want you to," Courtney cuts in, tears rolling down her cheeks. "I just…I want to earn back your trust."
Alison crosses her arms, completely uncomfortable with Courtney pathetically crying in front of her. She's never really seen Courtney cry so openly, even when they were younger, and its a little off putting—something's not right. It's also like looking in a mirror and Alison hates seeing this version of herself.
"You're assuming you've ever had my trust," Alison growls quietly, she's not stepping into this trap whatever it may be.
"We're blood, Ali, I'm your twin," Courtney says in the same manipulative way her parents talk to her. "Family."
"Emily is my family," Alison defends herself as she watches Courtney carefully. Her twin wipes at her eyes before speaking again.
"Does she forgive all your mistakes?" Courtney sniffles, her blue eyes glistening with a knowing look in them.
Alison feels her heart clench painfully thinking about how much she has fucked up with Emily recently and in the past. There are things Emily has forgiven or embraced of Alison that no one else has ever managed or tried to understand, like her fear and insecurities.
"She's pretty special, you're very lucky," Courtney compliments. To anyone else it would be an apologetic sister praising her twin's choice in partners but Alison catches the bright flash of jealousy in Courtney's wet eyes. It was the same look that would appear when Ali would receive more attention than Courtney when they were younger. It didn't happen often, but when it did, Alison had learned to develop a fear because Courtney almost always made her suffer for it.
"I won't let you touch her again," Alison promises seething with rage.
Courtney chuckles darkly all innocence evaporating, her true colors shining through.
"What makes you think I want to touch her?" she questions titling her head in amusement, a cruel look in her eyes. "I don't spread my legs as easily as you, Alison."
Alison's hand flies across Courtney's cheek before the other blonde can react and the slap echoes through the deserted alleyway.
"Keep talking, Courtney, cause there is plenty more where that came from," Alison promises angrily.
Courtney rubs at her throbbing cheek with a grimace.
"Does Emily know how quick you are to attack when you're angry?" Courtney questions slyly. Alison's mind instantly goes to the other night with Noel, how vicious she had turned in moments. Or when she had first met Emily and went on full offense mode with Paige. But she knows Emily isn't afraid of her—she would never hurt her lover like that. "Doesn't seem like a very good quality in a loving relationship."
"I swear to god Courtney, if you fuck with this I will kill you," Alison is barely containing her anger every nerve in her body screaming to attack her twin.
"Touchy, touchy," Courtney mocks. "I thought your beloved big sister taught you how to pick your battles."
Alison's eyes flash dangerously and Courtney pushes her advantage.
"Where is that control freak anyway?" Courtney muses. She's only met Cece once, when Alison visited Courtney and brought her along. But they hated each other the moment they met.
"Shut up."
"Did something happen, Ali?" Courtney almost sounds concerned. "What did you do?"
"Shut. Up." Alison mutters darkly, unable to handle thoughts of Cece right now.
"Thats right. Your little boyfriend killed-"
Alison lunges for her sister, wrapping her hands around Courtney's neck.
"Shut up right now or I swear to god I'll strangle you," Alison growls and Courtney merely laughs.
"Don't make threats you can't keep," Courtney says in a cruel voice as she pries Alison's hands off her and shoves her twin backwards. She turns to walk away and throws Alison another look. She smirks at the sight of her seething, broken twin. "Just wait for it, Ali."
Alison stares after her, her body shaking with revulsion and fear. She has a terrible feeling this is just the start of some nasty trouble.