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Chapter Thirteen. Ring.
Daryl didn't feel quite ready to wake up and yet, something began to pull him out of his slumber until his eyes finally fluttered open and he blinked into the greyness of the bedroom, growing lighter with the pre-dawn. It took him just a second to realize what had woken him up. Beth wasn't next to him in bed anymore. But it took him just another second for him to find her. He lifted his head from the pillow and saw her sitting on the window-seat, her knees drawn up to her chest as she looked out the window that overlooked the backyard. He saw her journal resting on the cushion at her feet and he wondered how long she had been awake and out of bed.
He sat up, digging the heels of his hands into his eyes, and he then glanced at the clock. It was just a little after five and except for the birds chirping outside, everything else seemed pretty much silent. Beth turned her head and looked at him as he pulled himself from bed, giving him a small smile. He crossed the room towards her and without a word, Beth scooted forward a little and Daryl sat down behind her, settling his back against the wall and Beth moved back, resting her back against his chest. He didn't say anything either.
Outside, the morning dew still glistened on the blades of grass and a low fog hung a couple of inches off the ground. At the edge of the woods, he could see a doe nuzzling her snout down amongst the leaves, smelling something. The sky was growing lighter in the east and soon, it would be streaked with pinks and purples. It was Saturday and it was going to be nice all day – he could tell by the morning sky. Merle was going to be coming over later and maybe he could help him work on the Firebird and Hunter would want to help, too.
He heard Beth exhale a soft sight and she leaned her head back against the front of his shoulder, her eyes never looking away from the window. She drew her legs up and hugged her knees to her chest. Daryl brought his arm around her front, holding her to his chest as if she was going to get up and he didn't want her to.
He had been married to Beth, been with her long enough, to know that she was thinking about something; had obviously gotten out of bed for some reason because she had been unable to sleep. And he didn't ask her what it was because he wanted to figure it out for himself. Most wouldn't think Beth worried about things. She was always smiling or giving a kind word to anyone who might need it and people in their town looked at her as if she was an actual ray of sunshine living amongst them.
When it was just the two of them though, she would sometimes be quiet and the corners of her mouth weighed downwards a little and he actually hated seeing her with even the smallest of frowns because this was Beth and a frown didn't belong on her face. It looked unnatural to be there. When he had asked her to marry him, he remembered spreading his arms out to gesture to the small house they were standing in and told her that this was pretty much going to be it if she married him. And he remembered the way she had shaken her head and cried and told him that she didn't care about that. And she didn't. In all of their years together, Beth hadn't once asked for more than he could give her.
But that didn't mean that he worked his ass off every day to give her everything. He had told her that they would have a poor life but ever since he said that to her, ever since Beth Greene came into his life, he pushed himself to give her more; to give her the absolute best life so she didn't go through one day of it with a frown on her face.
Some of it was out of his control though, he knew, and he looked at the side of her face, noting the small frown, and wondered what it could be. There was Luke and his birth mom, Valerie. He had refused to see her and Valerie hadn't made a move to approach him since they ran into her in the grocery store but maybe Beth was worrying she would.
Or maybe she was thinking about Hunter right now. He hadn't gotten into trouble lately but he was a Dixon and it was just a matter of time before he did again. And with summer break from school just a couple of weeks away, they would have to think of ways to keep Hunter from wreaking havoc around town.
Or maybe her thoughts were about Abby this morning. They had gotten the little girl hearing aids and were trying to help her get used to them but the world had been at such a soft murmur for so long that suddenly hearing everything so loud and clear, Abby seemed to scream and cry at everything lately, never wanting to wear anything in her ears, and neither he or Beth had any clue what to do about it.
It could be any of those things – most of her worrisome thoughts usually always about their kids – but maybe it was something else. Something completely different and Daryl sat there and tried to think of everything going on in their life right now to warrant Beth being out of bed so early that morning with a frown on her face.
He dropped his head down and couldn't help but press his face against the side of her throat. He felt the rise of her jaw and knew that she was smiling faintly now and he closed his eyes, breathing in her light sweet scent. Beth tilted her head towards his and he nuzzled his nose before lifting his lips, brushing them against the corner of her jaw. She let out a quiet hum from the back of her throat and turned her own head, brushing her lips across the side of his throat.
"What are you doin' out of bed so early?" He finally asked her in a quiet voice.
Beth pulled her head back so she could give it a small shake. "Just couldn't sleep."
He stared at her then, trying to decide if she was telling him the truth or not. Beth was never able to lie – not that she was the sort to tell lies. She had these big blue eyes and he could see everything in those eyes. Everything she was thinking or feeling, she was never able to hide it from anyone – especially from him. He knew Beth like the back of his hand and he looked at her now, studied her, made sure that he still knew her and that she wasn't finally able to hide something from him.
She smiled a little then as if she was reading his mind. "I'm serious, Daryl. Just couldn't sleep is all. I was writing a few little poems down and watching outside."
"Hmmmm," Daryl hummed, making it clear that he didn't completely believe her.
"Well, what are you doing up?" She asked.
He shrugged at that. "You know I can't really sleep without you," he said and she smiled faintly at that, leaning her head in to his, her nose brushing against his, and they both knew he meant it.
He could sleep without Beth next to him, sure, but he didn't sleep that well. He had gotten used to her warmth and the shared weight on the mattress and how some mornings, he would wake up with some part of her touching some part of him. He had told her once – years earlier when there was still the little house in the woods and she was sneaking away almost every night to see him – that he had never had a stuffed animal growing up and he guessed some part of his mind had tried to make up for that, making Beth his stuffed animal. And Beth seemed to know that because she never complained when he hugged her a little too tightly at night.
She turned her head back towards the window and looked out. The sun was nearer to the horizon line now, nearly ready to pop over it and begin to make itself visible, and with it, the birds seemed to be singing a little louder. The doe was slowly walking along the edge of the woods, her nose still down to the ground, and Daryl couldn't help but wonder what the animal was tracking down. A sudden noise though made the doe lift her head, going completely still except for the twitching of her ears, and then she took off, running and disappearing into the trees.
He could hear a creak of a floorboard in the hallway and then the bathroom door closed, one of the kids up but probably heading right back to bed when they were done. Daryl looked back to Beth. The small frown had returned to her face.
"What is it?" He couldn't help but ask – a bit on the gruff side – and again, Beth shook her head. He let out a short sigh. "Beth," he said her name but he didn't know what to follow that up with so he didn't say anything else.
She kept her eyes turned towards the window. "It's you, Daryl," she said.
His eyebrows shot up at that, not able to hide the surprise from his face. What the hell had he done that it would get her up so early and keep her from sleeping?
"I love you more than anything," she said softly, answering the question he hadn't spoken out loud. But she knew him like he knew her and could read his mind. "I've loved you since I was twenty-one. Since the second I saw you for the first time."
"What the hell are you talkin' about?" He couldn't help but ask.
Beth turned her head to look at him. "Why have you never worn a wedding ring?"
He was going to be honest with himself. He did not see that coming.
He heard the bathroom door down the hall open again, the water running from the toilet being flushed, and the same floorboard creaked as whatever kid it was that had been up went back to bed. Daryl almost wished that they had come into the room right now to interrupt because Beth was staring at him and he had absolutely no idea what the hell was going on.
"It was something Lizzie said yesterday-"
"You're listenin' to some lil' girl who's not all there in the mind department?" He couldn't help but interrupt up with the question, his own frown on his face now.
"That's not nice, Daryl, and she didn't mean anything by it. It was just a comment she made about some article she had read in one of those women magazines. About married men who had a tendency to not wear a wedding ring because they were having affairs," Beth said.
That made him scowl and his entire body tensed. What the hell had happened? It had been a quiet early morning on the window seat with his wife and now she was accusing him of having affairs and running around on her?
Again, Beth read his mind though he supposed for once, it wasn't that hard to. She shook her head fiercely and turned herself slightly to look at him more head on.
"I have never thought that about you for a second, Daryl," she said. "But it did get me to think about… you've never worn a wedding ring. We've never even gotten you one. And I was just wondering why."
Daryl kept staring at her, kept frowning. His eyes then drifted down to the band of cheap gold around Beth's fingers that he had slipped on in that wedding chapel in Atlanta during the quick ceremony and how she hadn't taken it off since that day. He thought of Rick, too, and the ring he always wore on his finger; remembered the way he had freaked out that afternoon when Daryl had been helping him clean the gutters at the Grimes house and he had thought he had lost it.
He felt himself shrug again. "Jus' never been a ring kind of guy," he said and he knew it was a weak answer but it was the only one he had right now to give and besides, it was the truth. "Didn' want to lose it in the woods or at the shop or get it dirty and have to always be takin' it on and off," he pushed himself to further tell her.
Beth nodded her head then as if she had known all of that already. "I know," she then confirmed and gave him a small smile and he studied it closely, determining that it was actually a real smile and he had never felt so relieved to see it before.
She leaned in and gave him a soft kiss. "I'm going to go get some eggs. I have a taste for some scrambled eggs this morning." She gave him another kiss and with that, she pushed herself off the window seat and headed out of the room.
Daryl remained sitting on the window-seat, not following after her, and he almost wished he hadn't pushed Beth into telling him what was wrong.
…
Merle and him might have gone down two completely paths in life but they were still brothers and there were some things that Daryl just wanted his brother to be with him when he did it.
"Surprised you haven't done this already, lil' brother," Merle grinned from the seat next to the one Daryl was sitting back in.
He had taken his shirt off and had done it quickly and sat down before anyone could see his back. Tara, Merle's usual tattoo artist, had snapped on a pair of clean latex gloves and was now cleaning the space on his chest that Daryl had chosen for the tattoo to be placed.
"I'm a lil' slow when it comes to things like this," Daryl hated to admit, grumbling as he did so, frowning a little as Tara picked up the ink gun.
It wasn't his first tattoo but he hadn't gotten one in a few years and he suddenly remembered how much he hated the initial pain. But there was no way he wasn't going to do this. Hopefully, Beth would like it.
"This is why I ain't ever gettin' married," Merle said with a shake of his head. "You have kids with that girl. A house. And it's still not enough."
Daryl couldn't help but smirk a little. "That's really the reason why you ain't gettin' married?" He asked and he heard Tara snort with soft laughter.
He took a deep breath and looked down to the gun about to make contact with his sin. Tara seemed to sense his mood – not really reluctance or doubt but something a little close to hesitancy. She stopped her hand before making contact with his skin.
"You ready?" She asked, looking at him.
Daryl nodded almost immediately. "Yeah."
He didn't know if Beth would like this or if this was just some poor excuse of a replacement because he didn't want to wear a ring. He didn't know if she was hurt by it or disappointed after all of these years of him never having worn one before. He didn't know if she was beginning to doubt his commitment to her – as if these past years with her hadn't happened and he couldn't believe that he was agreeing with Merle but he was. He and Beth had been through too much together, had too much together for her to be doubting him for even a second just because he didn't want to wear some ring.
And he didn't know if she was because she hadn't said she did or acted like she did but if she was doubting – even for a second – he supposed it was up to him to put whatever doubt she had to rest.
Tara moved in and the gun hit his skin and he clenched his teeth but didn't flinch and he relaxed back into the chair, figuring he'd be home in a couple of hours. He couldn't wait to see Beth's face when he showed her what he had done.
Merle was staying for dinner and they drove back to the white house, pulling up in front of it just as the screen door burst open and Hunter ran out, laughing about something, and Luke ran after him, clearly intending to murder him if he caught him, both heading in the direction towards the woods off to the side of their house. They ran past Daryl, who didn't even try to stop them, as he climbed the steps and went into the house, Merle behind him.
"Wanna beer?" Daryl asked and without waiting for an answer, in the kitchen, he opened the refrigerator and took out two cans, handing one to Merle.
Beth was there, standing at the island counter in the middle of the kitchen, cutting up tomatoes. "Hey," she smiled at them both. "Where have you two been?"
Daryl shrugged. "Runnin' an errand. Smells good in here."
"Beef and pasta casserole. Should be ready by five," she said, looking at Daryl as he came around to stand beside her, giving her a kiss on the side of her head.
Daryl looked to Merle and Merle smirked, taking a quick chug from the beer can.
"'m gonna go make sure my nephews don't kill each other," Merle said as he turned, heading out of the kitchen, making himself scarce.
"Where's Abby?" Daryl asked once it was just the two of them and Beth resumed cutting the tomatoes into slices.
"Upstairs having a tea party. Where'd you and Merle go?" She asked.
He took a sip of beer and then set the can down on the counter. Without a word, he grabbed the back of his tee-shirt and tugged it off over his head. Beth looked at him, curious and confused, her eyebrows shooting up, but then she saw the white bandage on his chest and she gasped, quickly putting the knife down.
"Daryl, what happened?" She asked, her fingers reaching for his chest.
"Don't worry," he shook his head. "Should have done this a long time ago."
He slowly began peeling the bandage back to show her what was beneath. He watched her face as she saw the newest mark on his body – a tattoo in black script of her name. Beth. Right over his heart.
"I know it ain't a ring but I can't ever lose this," he told her.
Beth didn't say anything. She just stared at the tattoo with an expression that Daryl discovered he really couldn't quite figure out – and he didn't know if he should be nervous about that or not.
But then she lifted her eyes and he saw tears brimming in them. "You did this for me?" She asked as if there a possibility of another answer.
"Only Beth I know," he shrugged, trying to keep casual about the whole thing. "Only Beth I'm married to. You like it?" He then felt brave enough to ask.
She rapidly nodded her head. "I love it," she said in a hushed tone. She looked at it again and then looked to him. "I love you." She stood on her toes and her hands went to his cheeks and she kissed him. "I love you," she said again, hardly able to lift her lips off of his to say it. "Our relationship is so unbalanced," she then murmured.
"What are you talkin' 'bout this time?" He asked and his brow furrowed and his hands rested heavily on her hips.
"You do all of these things for me and I feel like maybe I don't do nearly as much for you," she admitted. "Should I get a tattoo of your name somewhere on my body, do you think?" She then asked, genuinely, as her eyes lowered back to her name on his chest, studying it for a moment before looking to his face again.
Daryl looked at her and couldn't help but frown. He wondered if he was married to a woman who was losing her mind. "You really think you don't do anythin' for me?" He asked and her lips parted to respond but before she could, he leaned down and covered her mouth with his.
…
Next chapter, Hunter wants Daryl to come to his class for career day. I am also beginning work on the next chapter of Who We Are.
Thank you very much for reading and please review!