Sorry its been a while. I know. Life happens. Once again all rights to Bioware for dragon age stuff. Please Review!
Ellana winced as her boots pinched her toes. She was beginning to really hate boots. Leliana and Josephine had approached her in Haven and asked her to wear them because some of the people were a little uncomfortable that she would walk around barefoot. She had been reluctant to wear the unfamiliar garb, but they had made some very convincing arguments and stated that it was a small change to make that would make others more comfortable. Ellana had agreed grudgingly, and donned the footwear. Having gone her whole life with some light leather wrappings at the most, these boots were causing her a lot of pain and blisters from their unfamiliar movements.
It was worse today than it had been. They had been traveling to the Hinterlands for the last day and hours of walking was causing her to really loath these inventions for protecting their feet. The party had just left the Inquisition camp where Scout Harding had given them a rundown of the area. Ellana liked her immediately. She was practical and smart but had a sense of humor that would shine through often. Ellana had forgotten her pain momentarily while meeting her, but now that they were on the move again, it just seemed to get worse. She stopped abruptly, hearing her companions stop behind her and tense, probably thinking she had seen an enemy. She sighed, embarrassed that they would see her antics, but she didn't care much anymore. She had to get out of these boots right now.
She dropped down gracelessly into a sitting position, and she could hear Cassandra make a confused sound behind her. Ellana began yanking on her boot, releasing her foot from its prison. Varric laughed loudly behind her.
"Sick of your shoes then? I was surprised you wore them this long."
Ellana grimaced over her shoulder at him, as she finally wrenched off the offending item.
"My blisters have blisters. I don't need them, and don't want them, and Leliana and Josephine can deal with it." She said with vehemence, tossing the boot over her shoulder in Varric's direction, who had to dodge the offending item. He laughed again.
"Yeah I knew a couple of elves back in Kirkwall who never wore any shoes. People will get used to it. Besides, Chuckles doesn't wear any shoes either." He was grinning as he moved out of the way of the second boot thrown to follow the first.
Ellana sighed, this time in pleasure as her feet finally felt free. It was wonderful. She leaned back on her elbows and wiggled her toes, smiling.
"Besides," She said, "its easier to do a lot of things without boots on. Like climbing, or sneaking around. You cant feel as much with boots on which makes it harder. That's why you can hear Cassandra coming from a mile away." She grinned, looking over her other shoulder at the Seeker. Cassandra huffed, annoyed, but her mouth twitched in a small smile.
"I don't sneak." Cassandra stated matter of factly. Ellana laughed at her tone.
"We know Cassandra. Your skills are much louder with war cries and the screams of fear from your enemies!" Ellana pumped her fist in the air enthusiastically. Cassandra rolled her eyes.
"If we are quick done ridding ourselves of useful artifacts of clothing, could we maybe move on? We have a lot to do." Ellana laughed again at Cassandra's annoyance and stood. She turned, brushing herself off, and looked at Solas who had been quiet during this exchange and he was smiling at her. Ellana had found herself looking at him often. He was interesting and different. He was so stoic and knowledgeable, and yet sometimes she would catch him smiling, or he would say something fun or even flirtatious. Ellana didn't really think he was flirting with her, just being friendly. But it still caught her attention. She smiled back at him, pushing her thoughts away, and turned back toward the path and they headed forward to find the Reverend Mother they were going to meet.
After speaking with Mother Giselle, Ellana still didn't have much hope for the support of the Chantry. But the Mother was kind and confident that with Leliana's help they could have an influence on the clerics. Ellana walked back to where her companions were waiting for her. Cassandra spoke when she saw her approaching.
"What did she say?"
Ellana explained what the Mother had said about her plan to bring some of the chantry together who might be amenable to the Inquisition and with help, try to sway their support. Cassandra nodded and began to talk with Varric about the politics of the chantry and how they would make this plan work, but Ellana had tuned them out. She was tired of politics and talking of the Chantry. She was looking around the little village, if you could even call it that, that had been swarmed by the refugees. She noticed an elderly woman carrying a bag of supplies, struggling under its weight until she dropped it to the ground and rested for a moment, her hands pressing into her lower back. Ellana left her companions, who had turned to arguing, not caring at all if they noticed her absence, and walked to the woman's side.
"May I help you, grandmother?" Ellana asked, trying to sound friendly, but preparing herself for the scathing look she normally received when people looked and saw her pointed ears. The woman looked at Ellana and her widened slightly at her very Dalish appearance, but, after a moment, she nodded and smiled slightly. Ellana smiled back at her, glad of her reaction. The old woman had a kind face, weathered from years of working outside, and her hair was silver, wrapped in a tight bun on her head. Her dress was old and had been patched in many places. It hung loosely on her thin frame.
Ellana leaned down and picked up the supplies easily.
"Where would you like me to take these?" The old woman smiled at her and started chatting away as she led her to the tent where her family was staying.
"Thank you so much for helping me, dear. These old bones don't move like they used to. What brings you out this way?" Ellana smiled at her.
"I'm here with the Inquisition." She wasn't going to tell this woman that she was the Herald, since she didn't believe it anyway, and didn't want to intimidate her. The woman smiled at Ellana, nodding.
''Oh, you folks are just wonderful. Its about time someone stepped in to do something about those mages and Templars causing a mess all over Thedas. They burned down our farm you know." She spoke to Ellana like she had known her forever. It was strange. Ellana was so used to humans being degrading and harsh. "Apparently there had been a group of rebel mages in the area and some Templars came in to deal with them," She rolled her eyes, "and the resulting fight caused a fire that took three houses. We had no where else to stay and we heard that this was a good place to start. Mostly because of your people, dear." She patted Ellana's arm. "My name is Maud, by the way. What's yours?"
"Ellana."
They had approached a small cluster of three tents where Maud directed her to place the supplies and then she led her around her little camp, proudly introducing her to her elderly husband, two grown sons, their wives, and her grandchildren. Ellana had smiled and greeted each of them kindly, even when it was clear that her sons were suspicious of her, eyeing her ears and her tattoos. Ellana couldn't really blame them for their suspicions. Dalish were hardly known for their friendliness to shems. Once Maud had shown Ellana her whole family, she turned to Ellana excitedly.
"You should stay for supper! Let me thank you for helping me!" Ellana could hear one of her sons grumble something about not needing help if she had just called one of them over.
Ellana shook her head though, smiling at the kind old woman.
"I really shouldn't intrude. And besides I have duties to attend to. Is there anything you are lacking? I can check the inquisitions stores if there is anything you need."
Maud insisted she stay, but when Ellana made it clear she would not intrude, she did admit that their only concern was the food and the medicines. She told Ellana about the hunter who was struggling to meet people's needs because of the fighting in the area. She pointed to where the hunter was living. She said that there was no healer in the crossroads and the Corporal had been looking for one. Maybe she could talk to him about it. Ellana waived away Maud's continued thanks and walked away, intending to find the hunter to see how she could help. As she moved away she heard Maud's son say something about knife-ears and then she heard Maud smack him and scold him for his words. It made Ellana laugh. She hoped Maud and her family would make it safely to a new home.
Ellana looked around as she walked. She could see where Cassandra was talking to another Inquisition soldier, Varric was perusing the wares of a merchants cart, and Solas...Solas was watching her. When their eyes met she blushed a little, wondering if he had seen her help Maud and how she had been dragged around her small family. She turned away from him, intent of finding this hunter. She walked up the steps away from Solas and the other two, and saw the man Maud had described.
He looked like a hunter, with furs and leathers as most of his clothes. He was standing by a large pot over a fire and he seemed to be muttering to himself.
"Mages, Templars, Bandits, Demons... making it hard for a man to hunt for his supper." He glanced at her as she walked up.
"These people need food?" She asked him. He also glanced at her, noticing her branching tattoos and her pointed ears. Ellana sighed quietly. It was a little irritating to have that be so important to these people, but then again, her people did that as well. Why did it matter so much? But the hunter didn't comment or change his demeanor, which was already irritated.
"There are rams out in the hills. Good eating, cooks easy, and no lords around to kill you for poaching." He sighed. "Too dangerous to go hunting now though. More likely to find Mages than mutton."
Ellana looked at him. He had a strange way of rambling on, not quite making a normal sentence.
"My party will be travelling in the area. If we get a chance to hunt we will bring back whatever we can. Good luck." He nodded at her, but said, "Luck won't put fat on your ribs."
Ellana turned to walk away. Already thinking of how she could hunt in the area. She would need to buy a bow and some arrows. Animals killed with magic always had a funny taste to them. At least she thought so anyway. She jumped when she almost walked straight into Solas. He chuckled at her surprise.
"You hear me when I'm trying to follow you silently, but you don't notice when I'm not even trying to hide my approach." She rolled her eyes at his teasing but smirked.
"I was thinking. I want to go hunting." Solas raised his eyebrows in a way that Ellana was becoming very familiar with.
"You just suddenly have the urge to hunt?" She laughed a little. Obviously he hadn't caught the conversation between her and the hunter.
"No. The people here need food. They have been unable to hunt because of the fighting in the area and the Inquisition can't feed them. It would be easy for me to hunt for them. I have the skills to avoid detection and to fight off any unwanted attention." Solas eyed her as she spoke, his eyebrows drawing together.
"You are planning on going alone." She shrugged but nodded. He shook his head.
"I will come with you." He stated with confidence. She bristled a little at his assumption.
"You think I can't take care of myself?" He studied her face for a moment. She wasn't sure what he was looking for.
"No. I think you are very capable. But you are an important part of the Inquisition, and Cassandra will refuse to let you go alone. I can keep up with you and it will take away Cassandra's reasons for preventing you from going at all." She blinked at his assessment, staring at him. He was right, of course. She was beginning to feel like he was always right. She also hadn't really noticed the stormy blue gray of his eyes before now. She blinked, noticing she was staring and blushed. He raised his eyebrows again.
She turned away and started walking to where she had seen Varric and Cassandra. Solas fell into step beside her. Cassandra was still talking to the soldier who turned to her as she and Solas approached.
Cassandra looked at her as well, just barely glancing at Solas.
"Herald, this is Corporal Vale. We were just discussing the situation in the area. The refugees have many needs." Ellana winced at the title but didn't say anything. Cassandra always used the title when around others. Only in private had she dropped it to call her Lavellan but she still wouldn't call her by Ellana. Ellana nodded at both of them.
"I was speaking to Maud," At the mention of her name Corporal Vale chuckled, "she was telling me that you are lacking food and a healer?" Corporal Vale nodded.
"Yes. I am surprised that Maud would take it upon herself to talk to the Herald, but she is correct. The refugees also need more clothing and blankets. We have requisitioned some. I was going to try to send a patrol to Redcliff to see if they had a healer to spare, but since the rebel mages are holed up there, I haven't felt confident sending my men. Our main problem though is of course the mages and Templars. They raid and burn like bandits but are better trained and have grudges against everyone. It's making for a very bloody fight."
Ellana nodded. She didn't tell him that Maud had no clue she was the Herald.
"We can keep an eye out for any healers we can send your way. Also I will go hunting, to bring in at least enough to give everyone a good meal." Corporal Vale looked surprised at her, glancing at the Seeker whose countenance was suddenly stormy.
"Ah, well if you can bring back anything, that would be appreciated. But don't go out of your way. We will find a way to take care of it. Excuse me." A runner had approached while he spoke handing him a scroll and speaking quietly to him as Corporal Vale headed off to deal with some newly arisen problem. Ellana frowned after him, but turned to look at the Seeker. Cassandra glared.
"Absolutely not. We can send others to hunt for these people. We need to move on and find the horse master and get back to Haven." Ellana put her hands on her hips, her frown deepening. Cassandra was in charge here. She was the Herald but that was only a symbol. However she knew she could easily help the refugees and be done quickly. It wouldn't even take much effort.
"Cassandra, it will take us just a few days to help these people. We are here and able. Let us do some good." Cassandra shook her head, tapping her foot with impatience.
"How are you supposed to effectively hunt? We can't protect you and let you sneak about silently." Cassandra glared while Ellana just stared at her a moment. Understanding dawned on Cassandra's face.
"You want to go hunting alone?"
"I would accompany her." Solas said. Cassandra turned her suspicious eyes to Solas. She obviously still didn't trust him, and maybe not even Ellana fully. Ellana grimaced, annoyed at Cassandra's reluctance to trust. Ellana gathered her courage, straightened her back and raised her chin, and stared up at Cassandra with steel in her eyes.
"I will be going. Solas will come as backup. You and Varric will stay here. You would slow us down. We will be back by tomorrow night at the latest." It was only midday but Ellana did want to give them plenty of time to find enough for the people here. Cassandra looked very annoyed, but eventually relented to Ellana's determined gaze.
"Fine, but if you get yourself killed I will never forgive you." Ellana nodded and Cassandra stormed off after Corporal Vale. She knew the Seeker was just concerned over the possible loss of the Herald and the mark. Ellana sometimes felt like they didn't see her as a person, just a tool that had to be dragged around closing rifts. She was more than willing to help, but sometimes she wished she could just be Ellana, not the Herald. It would be good for Cassandra to stay here for a while. Ellana suspected there were other ways Cassandra could help the soldiers in the area, and undoubtedly Varric would find refugees to tell tales to. Ellana glanced at Solas, but he was looking at her again and she quickly looked away. He was probably wondering what was up with her sudden urge to court death by standing up to the Seeker. Ellana sighed and walked over to the merchants cart and picked out a bow, and quiver, slinging them smoothly over her back as she tossed the man the coin to purchase the items. Varric sidled up next to her.
"I hear you are leaving me with the Seeker for a while. To go hunting. Why can't I come along?" The look he gave her was a little indignant. Ellana looked down at him.
"We need to move quietly and quickly to hunt effectively. I know you are an amazing shot with Bianca but can you silently stalk your prey in the woods, and then harvest the meat?" Varric grimaced, which gave her the answer. She chuckled.
"You are a wonderful fighter Varric. But this isn't fighting." Varric laughed.
"You're making me blush. But I get your point. And I know Chuckles can be quiet. He sneaked up on me once. Nearly shot him." Varric poked the bow she had just purchased, wiggling it on her back. "You know how to use this? I have only seen you use a staff."
Ellana shrugged. "I was trained in the bow before I discovered I was a mage. I kept it up." Varric hummed and eyed her speculatively.
"We might have to test your skills sometime." He grinned at her. Ellana, even after knowing him for such a short time, knew he had a tendency to gamble over anything he could. She laughed.
"Trying to make yourself richer? How do you know I won't be better than you?" Varric grinned, confidence lining his face.
"There is nothing wrong with a little wager between friends. And I highly doubt you could be better than Bianca and I. We are perfect together." Varric's eyes sparkled with mischief. Ellana suspected he was trying to bait her into agreeing. But she still just shrugged, smiling.
"We will see Varric." Ellana also fished a small hunting knife from her pack and put it in her belt. She turned back toward Solas who was waiting for her a little distance away. She waived at Varric as she walked away, and he grinned at her. She walked up to Solas, who looked as calm and stoic as ever.
"Come on, let's get going." Solas nodded, and they turned and exited the Crossroads.
Ellana barely breathed as she held her bow taught, aimed at a ram on the hillside. She relaxed, exhaling, and the string slipped out of her fingers, the arrow flying true, and finding its mark. The ram fell, dead without pain or struggle. She stood and walked over to it, Solas following silently behind her. Ellana knelt down and put her hand on the creatures side, silently thanking it for its sacrifice. If she had been hunting alone she would have said it aloud, but she knew it was silly and didn't want Solas to know. It was why she had been so diligent in her aim, practicing until she had gotten it perfect. She never wanted to cause an animal undo pain. The other hunters in her clan had teased her ruthlessly about it, sometimes to the point of mocking. But she still thanked animals for dying to feed her or the clan. It just felt like a respectful thing to do when killing an innocent creature that didn't understand. Ellana pulled the arrow out of the ram and cleaned it, shoving it back in her quiver. Solas had been very quiet so far. Only saying a few words to either point out a game trail she missed or a group of passing Templars they hid from. Otherwise he just kind of observed and followed, watching her back. She didn't mind though. It was nice to do something as familiar as hunting. It felt peaceful.
She leaned down and with her knife started cleaning the kill. She needed to separate the meat from the organs. She went about her work with practiced hands, wrapping the meat in oil cloth. She handed it to Solas. When they had first started he had offered to freeze the meat so it would remain fresh by the time they got it back to the refugees. Ellana had agreed, it was a practical idea that would keep the meat from spoiling. Even if magic left a strange taste, it would be better than spoiled meat.
Ellana felt his magic tingle behind her, as she continued her work, comfortable in the rhythm they had established. They both froze though, when they heard rustling in trees to their right. The heavy footfalls and loud snuffling told her it was probably a bear, smelling out their recent kill. She turned her head to see Solas looking in the direction of the bear. He turned to her. His face was focused, eyebrows pulled together and mouth forming a frown. Ellana knew he was considering their next course of action. Bears around here were pretty big and mean. They might not be able to fight one off on their own. He jerked his head toward the forest in the opposite direction of the bear. She glanced at the ram before her. They had harvested about half of what they could. She hated leaving the remaining meat to the bear, but half was still better than nothing. She quietly packed up her tools, wiping her bloody hands on a cloth she carried with her for hunting. She pulled her bow and strung an arrow. She didn't want to fight the bear but it was good to be prepared. Solas led as they started to sneak away quickly.
The bear stepped out from behind a tree while they were still too close. It was focused on the carcass of the ram though so they continued to move. After a few steps though the bear noticed them. Ellana instinctively looked for a tree to climb. All the tree around them had branches too high to be of any help. She cursed in her head and glanced at Solas. He was staring down the bear, who seemed to hesitate. Ellana felt panic bubble in her throat. Bears were fast, so they couldn't outrun it, and without a tree to climb out of reach, their only option would be to fight. Hopefully though the bear would be interested enough in the ram that it would ignore them in favor of a free meal, though she doubted it.
Maybe three uneasy breaths passed her lips before the bear made its decision. It roared loudly and charged. Solas reacted instantly and put up a barrier around them. Ellana drew her bow smoothly, as the icy feeling of the barrier covered her whole body. She let loose a few arrows which embedded in the bears shoulders and neck and it roared again. Bears had a thick layer of fur, and fat beneath that. It made it very hard for arrows to penetrate. The charge had brought it close to them, even with Solas throwing magic at it the bear kept coming. As it came close, it reared up on its hind legs and swiped a giant paw at them. Ellana dodged the swipe that could crush her skull, not to mention the claws that would cut her to ribbons. Solas dodged the other way, not letting up his barrage of magic. They had separated in avoiding the blow, now on either side of the bear. It turned toward Solas. She heard him curse aloud, his face angry.
Ellana had an idea. When it roared she could see the fleshy roof of its mouth. She knew that if she could get an arrow in that spot it would probably penetrate the brain and kill it, but it would be very risky. Of course a bear was now stalking Solas who was only wearing light armor. But so was she. She sighed at her own stupid idea but had confidence she could make it work. Just probably not without being hurt. It had gotten too close to Solas and it swiped at him, catching his barrier so he wasn't hurt but still knocking him back on the ground. She wouldn't let this bear catch Solas while he was down. She drew her bow fully back and yelled.
"Hey!"
She shot an arrow at it to gain its attention. It flipped around and saw her. She yelled again to make sure it was fully focused on her. Solas had a look of surprise on his face at her outburst, usually only warrior would risk taunting an enemy to draw their attention. The bear turned toward her and started charging. Her panic bubbled up again as she waited. She needed the bear to be close and roaring if this was going to kill it. Solas had stood up and was firing ice at it again, but the bear seemed to ignore it, fully focused on Ellana. She drew her bow back and stared as it ran at her. She exhaled, controlling her aim, waiting for the right moment. If that moment never came she would probably be dead. She heard Solas yelling something at her, probably telling her to move, but she kept still. The bear had crossed the space in a matter of a few seconds, but Ellana was almost impatient for it to finally get to her. It reared up again, which she wasn't expecting, and opened its mouth in a roar. She smirked and let her arrow loose. it penetrated the roof of the bears mouth smoothly, slicing though cavity and cartilage and into the brain.
Instantly dead, the bear's body came crashing forward, and Ellana didn't have time to dodge. The huge weight crushed her back and both of them tumbled to the ground. All the air was forced from her lungs and she felt her head sharply hit a rock in the fall, and with the extra weight she was pretty sure she felt a rib or two crack. She struggled from her lack of air and the pain and panic that was taking over her brain. She felt magic stir around her though and Solas lifted the bear away, energizing the air around them to lift the heavy weight. She struggled to gasp as the bear was removed. Her lungs didn't want to cooperate.
Solas dropped the bear on the other side of her and knelt down, putting a hand on her shoulder, his stormy eyes scanning her. If she wasn't still struggling for breath she would have blushed.
"Are you alright? Are you hurt?" His eyebrows were pulled together so tightly with concern that he had a little wrinkle appear there. She gasped for breath still but managed a strangled sounding chuckle.
"I'm... fine." Solas sighed and sat fully beside her. His concern fading into anger.
"That was stupid. You could have gotten yourself killed. What if you had missed? Or he hadn't roared? I assume it was your plan to shoot him in the mouth. That's why you let him get so close?" Solas was scolding her now. She had finally gotten some control over her breath, but instead of speaking she just nodded at him. He rolled his eyes and sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. Ellana sat up slowly. She was sure her ribs were broken, but it didn't quite register with her brain yet. What felt bad was the back of her head. There was a pulsing there that quickly grew to be a pounding headache. She felt lightheaded as she sat up and had to steady herself as she wavered. Solas eyed her, concern touching his eyes again.
"Are you sure you're alright?" He put a hand on her shoulder to steady her. She reached back and touched the back of her head, where the pulsing was focused, and her hand came away sticky and red. Her vision tunneled a little as Solas' face went in and out of focus.
"Whoa." She said. "I think I need to lay down." Solas helped her gently lay back as he moved up a little closer to heal her. Ellana blushed a little as his long fingers gently turned her head and he worked his fingers through her braided hair to the gash. He sighed.
"Your hair is getting in the way. I'm going to need to take it down. I don't want to close the wound with hair or dirt in it." She nodded and moved her hand above her head again to help, but her ribs decided it was time to make themselves known and they ached causing her to gasp at the movement, her vision tunneling once again.
"Just lie still." Solas admonished her movement and she settled down into embarrassed silence as he gently tugged the leather tie that secured her hair and ran his fingers through the braid to loosen it and make it more cooperative. Ellana closed her eyes. She had always loved it when Keeper Deshanna had touched her hair as a child. Teaching her to braid or doing her hair up in a fancy style for a celebration. But she never had a man touch her hair. None had ever had reason to. Now Solas was gently running his fingers through it, admittedly searching for a clear view of the wound on her head, but it was still pretty pleasant for all the pain she felt from her head and ribs. It was still very embarrassing though, and she could feel herself blushing horribly, even up to her ears. She hoped he wouldn't notice.
Solas got clear access to the wound, and he cleaned it gently with a cloth, which stung. Ellana couldn't help wincing when he poked at the tender flesh. Ellana felt his healing magic tingle along her scalp as the flesh stitched itself together, following his directing fingers. She kept her eyes closed the whole time, avoiding looking at the closeness of his face as he worked. He leaned back when the wound had closed fully. He sighed.
"Are you hurt elsewhere?" Ellana opened her eyes at the annoyed sound of his voice. His eyes were clouded over and he still looked angry as he wiped her blood from his fingers. She gingerly sat up, feeling better after her head was no longer pounding, but still wincing at her ribs. She stared at him a moment, bristling at his anger.
"Why are you mad? It worked." She didn't want to admit to herself that she was only getting defensive because it hurt that he looked so angry at her. He was treating her like a child who had done something stupid and was lucky to be alive. She had made a calculated decision, and was confident in her abilities to see it through. Solas sighed, annoyance was still clear on his face.
"What if it hadn't? If you had died, we would have lost our only means to closing the rift... to a bear." Ellana frowned. Solas had been the only one who had not treated her like the Herald. She knew what her role in this war was. She knew she was a tool for the Inquisition. But she hated being treated like one. She was stung by his lack of confidence in her, and by his apparent concern for her mark more than her as a person. She stood up a little unsteadily, but turned away from him so he could not see her grimace at the pain in her ribs. She didn't want the close contact that would come with a healing, so she wouldn't tell him. At least not yet.
"Well it did work." She snapped back at him angrily. "And I'm fine." Ellana didn't look at him at all as she walked towards the bear. She wouldn't let this meat go to waste either. She cleaned the bear in silence, ignoring the stabbing pain in her ribs, packing away the meat in the oil cloth as before. Solas had sighed, but sat down next to her and began freezing the meat and packing it away. They didn't speak again until she was finished. Ellana cleaned her tools and packed them away. She stood, still fighting her aching ribs, trying not to show Solas she was in pain.
"We should probably find a camp for the night." Solas said.
Ellana looked at him, surprised he had been the one to break the silence. She nodded, feeling exhaustion begin to wear on her. She turned and headed away from the carcass of the bear. It wouldn't do for other predators and scavengers to come looking while they were still nearby. They walked in silence as the sun slowly slipped behind the trees. It was a beautiful sunset and Ellana enjoyed it, smiling softly at the sky. She couldn't help thinking of all the times she had watched the sunset before this had started. She had been a different person then. Ellana looked down at her mark. It changed her. She hated it. The mark separated her from those around her, while forcing her to stay with people who didn't want her. As if in defiance of her thoughts the mark twinged a little, flaring just slightly green and feeling like needles in her hand. She curled her fingers around it and clenched her fist until her knuckles were white.
Solas had always been friendly with her. Ellana felt like she didn't have to posture for him, especially after their conversation at the lake, where she had told him more of herself than anyone so far. Everyone else had this idea of what the Herald of Andraste should be like. And he didn't believe it. Just like she didn't. It made her comfortable to have at least one person who didn't look at her like she should be singing the Chant of Light while benevolently kissing babies and healing the wounded. Cassandra was dragging her all over the countryside, meeting Revered Mothers, recruiting for the inquisition. Cullen, Leliana, and Josephine were back in Haven, planning the next way they could use her to further their cause. It didn't matter that she was Dalish. That could be ignored it she acted the right way. Josephine was already trying to teach her ways to behave around nobles from Orlais. It disgusted her how used she was beginning to feel.
Ellana gritted her teeth and stopped walking, Solas stopping beside her. She was working herself into a rage and she knew she had to stop. There was nothing she could do about a lot of these problems and she had to help the Inquisition. She wanted to help. Which sometimes meant learning how to be more presentable to others.
"We'll stop here." She said shortly, turning away from Solas to gather firewood. She gathered branches around the area, grimacing every time she bent over as she stretched her ribs which were starting to hurt more, and went back to where Solas was waiting. She dropped down and began arranging the wood, quickly starting a fire with a waive of her hand. Once it was burning steadily in front of her, she backed to a comfortable distance and sat staring into the fire. She knew she was glowering. She didn't care though.
Solas stood across the fire from her and pulled out some bread and dried meat from his pack. They wouldn't cook tonight, even with the meat they were carrying with them. He approached her slowly, and sat down next to her. He held out the food to her, seemingly as a peace offering. Ellana glanced at him and the corner of his mouth was turned up just a little in a small smile, his eyes showed concern again. She sighed and accepted the food, slowly starting to pick at it.
"I'm sorry, Lethallan." Ellana felt a smile tug at the corner of her mouth at the familiar word, though her heart clenched a little, remembering the last man who had called her that. Solas sighed and continued. "I was worried... for a moment I thought you died when the bear landed on you. I should have known something so slight as a bear would not bring you down. You did, after all, walk out of the fade." He smiled and shook his head.
Ellana sighed, mentally releasing her anger. "Its fine, Solas. I understand. I also reacted poorly." Solas looked at her.
"You're not just a mark or the Herald to them. Or to me." Ellana sharply turned her head towards him, eyes widening that he had seen her concerns so clearly. He smiled a little at her surprise and she looked back to the fire.
"I know you are under a lot of pressure from everyone. But we all see you for who you are."
Ellana felt some tears sting her eyes. She blinked them back harshly, gritting her teeth. She hadn't cried since this whole thing started and she wouldn't start now. Instead she made an annoyed noise.
"You see me? There are a lot of ways that no one sees me Solas." She barked out a harsh laugh that ended quickly at the twinge in her ribs. "Like being told I have to wear boots to make others more comfortable? Or being told that I can't help refugees because I'm too valuable? Or maybe its the way all these shems are raising me on a pedestal as the Herald of Andraste but calling me knife-ear behind my back? Like being told I can't die because then how will we save the world?" Ellana's voice had slowly escalated until she was almost shouting at him. She released all her air in a slow exhale, trying to calm herself. She rubbed her forehead, and then went to run her hands over her braid. It was still undone, her hair hanging loosely down her back. How had she not noticed that? Oh well. She left it. It would hurt too much to reach up and redo it anyway.
Solas stared into the fire as well. He seemed to be considering before he spoke.
"A lot of people would be very sad if you died. I would be one of them. You have become my friend, Ellana. I would not see your life cut short so soon." Ellana nodded.
"Thank you, Lethallin. You are a friend to me as well." She sighed. "I just wish I didn't have this mark." She opened her palm and looked at him. Solas was looking at her hand with regret on every line of his face. She wondered why. The fire needed more wood as it was quickly eating through the branches she had already placed. She leaned over to her pile of wood to add another, not thinking about her ribs, and she gasped as they stretched and shifted. She curled back and wrapped her arms around herself. Solas had seen it though. And now she felt like a fool for not telling him sooner.
"You are still injured aren't you? I knew you were carrying yourself differently." He sighed and moved closer to her. "Where is it?"
She looked at him sheepishly.
"I think the bear might have broken a rib or two." Solas eyes widened at her.
"And you didn't tell me? That must have been incredibly painful. You are very stubborn." He smirked a little at her but his eyes still held concern. In the firelight he looked very handsome. Ellana shook those thoughts from her head.
"I was just angry. I'm sorry." Ellana said. Solas shook his head.
"You are the one who had to walk around with broken ribs. Let me heal them for you." He looked at her silently waiting for her permission. She nodded. She gently began to remove her armor with his assistance until she was just in her shirt and leggings. He gently placed his hand on her side where she indicated. Even his light touch made her gasp in pain. She blushed again. She didn't think she could ever be a healer like this if it required so much touching. Solas brow furrowed as he concentrated. He hummed a little in what sounded like confusion or maybe concern.
"I need to take a look at it. Lets get you laid down. This will be easier." Her blush deepened but she nodded. He was so straightforward about it, so stoic, there was no reason to be uncomfortable. She had to keep telling herself that. Still she fidgeted. He laid out her bedroll for her and she laid down gently, wincing when she pulled at her ribs. She laid down fully and Solas knelt beside her. She pulled up her shirt so he could look at her ribs, still leaving herself modestly covered. As she pulled it up though he hissed through his teeth, his eyes looking at her with concern.
"What?" She leaned up and looked down at herself. Her entire side was dark purple and blue, a bruise that spread all the way around to where she could no longer see it on her back. She stared.
"Wow. I did not expect that." Seeing it almost made the pain worse. Ellana gently lowered herself back to her bedroll.
"It looks like there is some internal bleeding, though luckily you didn't puncture a lung. I can heal the break and the bleeding, but it will take some time before your body is fully recovered." She nodded. He placed his hand on her skin where her broken ribs would be. She shivered. His hands were cold. He leaned over her focusing on his magic. She closed her eyes, so she wouldn't stare at Solas, and focused on her breathing. In and out. His hand was moving slowly over her ribs, his magic causing that tingling feeling that comes with a healing. In and out. Solas pressed his hand a little, feeling the break, and she hissed in pain and he muttered an apology. In and out.
This continued for a while, the pain starting to fade a little and allowing her to relax. She didn't even notice when she drifted into the fade.
Ellana jerked awake, gasping, but calmed quickly, remembering where she was. Her dreams kept her from peaceful rest in the fade. It was still dark and she could see the light of the fire casting eerie shadows around their camp. She rolled over gently, testing her body to see if the pain was gone. It was still there somewhat. Like the muscle pain after learning a new skill. But it was manageable. She also noticed that she awoke with a blanket tucked around her. She definitely didn't have that when Solas had started healing her. She smiled a little at his care for her.
She turned and saw him tending to the fire.
"Do you always have such restless sleep, Lethallan?" He didn't look at her as he spoke. Ellana blushed. This is why she usually liked to have her own tent. She didn't want to bother anyone, she knew she was a restless dreamer, and her dreams, since the conclave, had been disturbing.
She nodded and extracted herself from her bedroll, sitting cross-legged on the mat instead. "Its just dreams. I can manage. Ma serannas for healing me. I feel much better now." She smiled at him a little. He inclined his head.
"Ill take over watch. Why don't you get some sleep, Solas? I won't be able to now, anyway."
Solas looked at her for a moment but said nothing. Finally he nodded and laid down in his bedroll opposite her. He seemed to slip into sleep easily. She watched the remainder of the night, thinking about her dreams, where a particular Templar, Garrick, begged for his life, and Nethon begged her to stop as he was burned to ash in a destroyed temple. She still had not been in control, unable to stop the arrow loosed from the string, or the fire that consumed Nethon and seemed to come from her own hands. She sighed and settled in with her troubled thoughts.
The morning came quickly and Solas opened his eyes, looking at her. She wasn't sure if he sensed her pensive mood or if he just wasn't a morning person, but he didn't speak to her, and she didn't speak to him. She had withdrawn in on herself, contemplating what the fade had shown her. It was the first time Nethon had appeared in her dreams and she wondered why. She had put him aside in her mind until she had the time to mourn her friend properly. Was his spirit taking vengeance on her for forgetting him? She didn't think he would. But she would fix it as soon as she could. They weren't too far from where her clan was. Maybe she could convince Cassandra to let them visit for a short time.
Solas stood and started packing up his bedroll. She followed suit, donning her armor and finally braiding her hair back into its normal style. She couldn't remember the last time she had left her hair down that long. Not since she was very young at least. They extinguished their campfire and quietly headed back in the direction of the crossroads. On the way Ellana killed two more rams and gathered the meat. With the bear and the rams they had caught yesterday, they now had plenty.
"How is your side feeling?" He asked, after several hours of silence.
Ellana raised her arms above her head, stretching and only winced once. She smiled as he watched her.
"Pretty good, considering. You do good work, Lethallin." He smirked and nodded.
They didn't say anything else for the rest of the trip, though it wasn't an awkward silence. Rather comfortable actually. She smiled to herself.
They walked into the crossroads in the afternoon and Ellana headed straight for the hunter. He looked up at her warily as she approached.
"Here." She unloaded the oil wrapped frozen meat in a pile next to the hunter. He gazed at the pile with incredulity. She continued, "Some of this is bear. I hope that's alright. I know its gamy but its still food. It might help some." She stared at the pile wondering if it was enough. The hunter laughed and looked like he might hug her.
"This more than helps! With this I can fill these hungry bellies! Give these folks some hope!" He grabbed one of the packages and started unwrapping it. "They're even frozen." He muttered, shaking his head and smiling. He turned back to her and Solas and bowed.
"I didn't think much of the Inquisition, but no one else is helping like you lot. Maybe I was wrong." He smiled and turned back to his new supplies and began to prepare them. Ellana smiled and turned away. Solas continuing to walk beside her.
"It was very kind of you to offer to help these people. Not many would have done that." Solas spoke quietly. She glanced at him and he was smiling gently. She blushed a little and looked away.
"It is what I would have done for my clan. I just wanted to help, and besides, I met a wonderful woman here named Maud. All it takes is one act of kindness to help someone like her. This was an easy enough way to help." She grinned as she looked towards Maud's tent. She knew that the meat would be distributed equally among the refugees and that Maud and her family would get some as well. She smiled thinking about hungry people who would be eating in the crossroads tonight.
Solas was eyeing her speculatively.
"You are not what I expected." He said quietly, she glanced at him and opened her mouth to ask just what he had expected, but just then Varric saw them and yelled.
"You're back!" He jogged over to them. "Anything fun happen out there?" Varric waggled his eyebrows at Solas, who rolled his eyes at the dwarf. Ellana, not sure what that was about, just shrugged.
"Just hunting. Though we did get attacked by a bear." Varric's eyebrows went up.
"And you two took it out alone? Did Solas blow it up with magic or something?" Solas chuckled at that.
"Actually Ellana felled the bear with her arrows." Varric's eyebrows went up even further.
"So you weren't lying about your skills with that bow?" He laughed when Ellana just shrugged again. Cassandra had joined them now.
"Good you are back, and in one piece. We can head to Master Dennet and then back to Haven. I would like to set out immediately." Ellana felt that now was as good a time as any, so she quickly put a hand on Cassandra's arm and stopped her.
"Cassandra, can I speak with you a moment?" Cassandra looked down at Ellana's hand as though startled. Ellana lifted her hand away quickly, not because Cassandra looked angry, but she looked uncomfortable with the contact. Cassandra nodded though and both her and Ellana walked a little bit away from Solas and Varric who both watched them go with curiosity. They stopped just on the outskirts, out of range for Varric to eavesdrop. Cassandra looked at her expectantly. Ellana blushed and looked down.
"First I wanted to apologize for how I spoke to you before. I shouldn't have pushed so much. I just wanted to..." Cassandra cut her off then, holding up a hand to stop her.
"Don't apologize, Lavellan. I know that I can be harsh. I appreciate that you wanted to help these people. Its not how I would have done it, but I am not you. I am also not your commander. We are a team. Its a little different than I am used to, but you have proven yourself a capable fighter, and even a leader when the need arises. You don't need to apologize for reminding me of that." Cassandra looked uncomfortable with her admission. Ellana appreciated it though and smiled warmly at her.
"What was the second thing you wanted to discuss?" Cassandra asked and Ellana hesitated. She needed to do this and soon. But she knew they had other important things to attend as well. She sighed and shook the doubt from her mind.
"I want to go visit my clan. They are about two days east of us and I need to visit. I... there are things there I need to finish. And I feel I owe it to them to explain. They probably think I am dead after the conclave." Ellana stopped herself from rambling. Cassandra eyed her speculatively. She lowered her eyes to the ground in thought and Ellana let her consider. It wasn't a small thing she was asking. This was four days of travel not to mention however long they stayed with the clan. Cassandra raised her eyes.
"Very well, Ellana. You have done everything we have asked of you. I will assist you in this. You may want to ask Solas and Varric yourself though. Since this will not be official Inquisition business." Cassandra started to walk away.
"Ma serannas. Thank you Cassandra." Cassandra gave one of her huffs that sounded far less annoyed than usual as she continued to move away. Ellana turned back to see Solas and Varric still standing where she left them. Solas was politely looking elsewhere but Varric was studying her, trying to determine what was said. Nosy as ever. She grinned and walked back to them.
"So? Are you going to tell us? My attempts to read lips was unsuccessful and Solas wouldn't help." Varric grinned at her, but his eyes said he hoped she wasn't offended. Ellana smiled at him.
"I asked Cassandra if we could make a small detour. I want to visit my clan." Varric's eyes lit up at the news, but Solas drew his eyebrows together in a troubled way. She knew he didn't like the Dalish. She gave him an apologetic smiled.
"You don't have to come along if you don't want. I just... I need to close out a few things." Solas was watching her closely and she felt sure he knew why she wanted to return there. Though he didn't bring it up. Varric laughed.
"Why wouldn't we come with you? A chance to see your family? Your clan?" He didn't notice the way her eyes dropped at his mention of family. "Of course, I want to come." Ellana looked at Solas who was still studying her face. Undoubtedly, he had noticed her expression at the mention of family.
"I will accompany you as well." He lowered his head slightly and she smiled at him. She was more grateful for his agreement than anyone else. He was becoming her friend quickly, and she knew this would not be an easy visit. She knew she would have to warn them of a couple things before approaching her clan. But that would be done later.
They made their preparations, sending word to Haven of their intentions. The next morning, they set out towards clan Lavellan, apprehension already building in Ellana's chest.