Part Fifty-One: Like Mother Like Son

Monica shows up at the club when I am dancing one night. I've been staying with her ever since. She's with some woman who isn't Bob or that woman she skipped town with who she met in rehab. She's with someone else. She puts her hand on my back affectionately.

"Baby, here, try this," she tries to hand me a baggie of coke while a woman basically goes down on her right there at the table. I won't snort anything. Only pills. It's always only pills.

I blow her off to give a lap dance to an older man. He slips me some drug; I don't know what it is. I take it as I feel his erection against my thigh. He breathes on my neck. "You're so sexy, Curtis," He whispers in my ear. I never told them my real name or that I'm only seventeen.

"Honey, you look so cute in that," Monica tells me tugging on my shirt after I count the tips I have received from all the horny old men touching my ass and rubbing their dicks against me. I feel good. I thought dancing in the club would be strange, but it feels good. "How are you feeling?"

"Fine," I say downing a cocktail and tossing a pill that Monica has into my mouth. I get up and find another man to give a dance too. He takes me to the bathroom. I let him fuck me for $100 and some more pills, but the man doesn't leave after the sex. He pins me against the wall.

"Come home with me, Curtis. You're a cute little thing. I have fallen in love with you and want to be with you," He licks me. I'm used to that. I've been licked a lot since I started working here.

"Get off me," I tell him, though I am starting to feel the effects of that pill. I can barely fight with him.

"You're about to pass out, oh poor baby. Let me take care of you," He says.

"Get the fuck off him," says someone else. It's a man. I don't know who he is. I pass out in his arms. When I come to I am staring at Jimmy. Fiona's Jimmy. "Are you alright, Ian? What the fuck happened to you?" I am in a very nice apartment building. Jimmy is stroking my head. I sit up. He hands me a cup of coffee.

"Thanks," I say. I'm wearing my street clothes.

"Monica dressed you. I wasn't going to let her, but I figured since she's your mom she's probably seen you naked." I put the coffee down and latch on to Jimmy. He pets me for a moment before I let go of him. "You have changed, Ian."

"What are you talking about? I'm exactly the same."

"No you're not, man. Do you remember what happened last night?"

"No," I say.

"That's because you were roofied," Jimmy says stroking my hair very lovingly.

"I was?"

"Yeah. Was I…?"

"No. You might have been if I hadn't stopped him. Ian, that job is dangerous and you're much too young for it. You're going to get hurt. That guy was going to knock you out and kidnap you."

"I don't need you to take care of me. Where's Monica?"

"I made her leave. Ian, she's not good for you."

"She's my mother! She's been taking care of me."

"YOU WERE LIVING IN A CRACK HOUSE WITH DRUG ADDICTS, WHORES, AND CORSPES!"

"BUT SHE WAS WITH ME! WE WERE TOGETHER FINALLY. YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT IT!"

I don't know why we're shouting. I look around. We're alone. Jimmy seems frustrated. I begin to shake. I don't know why. Jimmy throws me a blanket. I wrap it around myself. He sits down and holds me. I shake in his arms.

"You're not going to send me home are you?"

"I really, really want to, but I am kind of hiding from Fiona myself. I go by Jack now. It's a long story. Ian, let me take care of you until the drugs are out of your system, then I will let you get back to Monica. I won't tell Fiona where you are."

I make Jimmy/Steve/Jack promise. So for a week I stay with him and one night I come home to Jimmy/Steve/Jack and tell him who I saw at the club.

"Lip and Debbie came to the club! It was so good to see them. I love them so much. Debbie is so tall and beautiful. I wish they would have stayed for a drink."

"Ian, you're high," Jimmy says.

"So?"

"You promised me you were going to stop," Jimmy says with his arms crossed.

"Are you kicking me out?"

"No, do you want to leave?"

"Well you don't fuck me so that's nice," I tell him. "I was staying with our dad."

"You were staying with my dad? Ian, please tell me you didn't fuck my dad again."

"I won't tell you," I say with a smirk.

"STOP FUCKING MY DAD!"

"I did. He kicked me out when Monica found me. We did kind of trash his place, but that's not the point. I liked being with him. He was nice to me and he'd never hurt me."

"That is so disgusting," says Jimmy. "So why'd you leave? You never told me."

"Relationship issues."

"With my dad?"

"No, with a boy from Southside. I was in love with him and he didn't love me."

"How do you know he didn't love you?"

"He married a woman."

"Oh, that doesn't mean he doesn't love you, Ian. I married Esti but that doesn't mean I didn't love Fiona."

"If he loved me he would have been at the bus station when I was leaving for Basic Training. He would have told me not to go. He would have pulled me in close and kissed me and told me to stay. He didn't do any of that."

"That doesn't mean he doesn't love you."

"I know. I just want him to tell me he loves me just once."

"You're really hung up on this guy," Jimmy says.

"Well, yeah. I've been in love with him forever."

"Tell me who it is," Jimmy says casually.

"Mickey Milkovich," I say. It's not a big deal if Jimmy knows. He's not someone who really knows Mickey. He isn't someone Mickey would feel threatened if he knew.

"Holy shit. Mickey's gay?"

I nod vigorously. "Enough about Mickey. Let's go out," I suggest.

"It's 3 a.m."

"Then let's watch a movie. I think we should watch something with James Franco."

"What is it with you and James Franco? He's not that hot," says Jimmy.

"Since when do you judge men?"

"Since I am very secure in my sexuality," says Jimmy pretending to be offended. "So does Mickey bottom?"

"I'm not telling," I say. Jimmy pokes me in the rib. I swat at his hand.

"When did you get a tattoo?" Jimmy asks.

"I don't remember."

He gives me a worried look that reminds me of Fiona. I shrug. He looks appropriate to being hit over by a bus. "How the fuck can you not remember? You were there."

"A lot of shit has happened to me in the last couple of months. Do you expect me to remember every detail?"

"Yes!"

A/N: In one of the episodes in season 1, Lip says he used Debbie's copy of "Eat, Pray, Love" to get Liam to sleep. Ian says he would have fallen asleep too if James Franco wasn't in the film. I decided to use James Franco as my go-to actor for Ian since he seems to find him attractive based on that comment.