.
.
It wakes her from sleep: the sound of something heavy clattering against the floor.
"Shirou?" Rin rubs the sleep from her eyes and peers out into the darkness. "Are you back?"
"Rin," Shirou says. Rin's eyes widen.
He is crouching on the floor, two long swords shoved to the hilt through his back. There is a large gash at his side and his arms are covered in small cuts and bruises; the blades stick out of his chest like broken ribs.
"I'm home," Archer says, and he gives her a weak smile before he doubles over.
"Shirou!" Rin says, and she jumps out of bed. Her hands are shaking when she touches the blade.
"What is this? Why were you stabbed? What's going on?"
She's never seen him like this. She wrings her hands, agonized. "Shirou, why are these swords still here? Shouldn't they have disappeared?"
Archer breathes, bracing his ribs with his hand. "I failed," he says.
"Failed? What do you mean you failed?"
"I couldn't kill them," Archer says. He closes his eyes.
"Rin, take me to the bathroom."
"Huh?! The bathroom? Shirou, you need to go to the bathroom?" Rin stares at the two swords sticking out of his chest, incredulously. Archer shakes his head.
"I'm bleeding on your carpet," he says.
"Who cares about the carpet!" Rin says.
"You are not the one who has to clean it up later."
Rin glares and grips one of the handles. "I'm going to pull these out, okay? And then I'll heal you and you'll feel better-"
"Rin, don't. I'll bleed more-"
"Okay, Shirou, I'm going to pull-"
"Don't-" Archer starts, but Rin braces a hand against his shoulder and heaves. The sword comes out with a sickening pop, and there's a spray of warm blood leaking all over her hand.
"If I were alive..." and Archer sighs, "...that would have made me bleed to death."
"Sorry," Rin says. She touches the other sword. "What do you want me to do with this one?"
Archer closes his eyes. "Pull it," he says. She grips the hilt and heaves.
She pulls the second blade out with one harsh yank, and Archer pitches forward, just barely catching himself before lowering himself on Rin's lap. The sword clatters on the ground and immediately dissipates, along with the other one lying beside her.
"Forgive me," Archer says. He smiles weakly at her. "This is the first time you've seen me fail, right?" Rin looks at him, horrified. Archer continues. "There are times I am...unable...to stop whatever it is that needs to be stopped. They caught me," Shirou says, and he grimaces. "I was unprepared."
"So what happens now?" Rin says. "Do they send another guardian?"
"They will summon me back there, once I've fully recovered." Archer smiles. "Do not look so shocked. You've seen it in your visions, right? All the times I've been killed...
I will just have to figure out a better way to stop them."
"Shirou," Rin says. He sighs into her lap.
"Just let me rest here a moment," Archer says, and he closes his eyes.
xXx
.
She presses a jewel against his side and concentrates. Feels her mana heating up within her palm.
Nothing. She can already see his body starting to de-materialize.
He normally recovers in the wasteland. Rin understands, even without him explaining it to her, that his mana is not replenishing nearly as quickly as it should be. Hours pass, and she watches him stir in a fitful sleep, taking shallow, labored breaths, a thin film of sweat coating his brow.
"Shirou," Rin says, and she fingers her jewel, nervously.
"I think I need to sleep with you," Rin says. Archer's eyes crack open. She can see blood crusting on the bottom of his lip.
"I am hardly in the mood, Rin," Archer says.
"Yeah, no kidding. It's so I can heal you," Rin says. Archer sighs and opens his eyes.
"Fine," he says, and with difficulty rolls onto his back. Rin sets her jaw and starts fumbling with the clasp on his belt.
Awkward doesn't begin to describe what she's doing; though they've had sex plenty of times before, this is the first time neither of them wants to do it, and she finds herself staring at the wall, blushing furiously as she awkwardly massages his penis in her hand.
"This is such a stupid way to transfer mana," Rin says. She takes him into her mouth, which normally would make him thicken and lengthen, but the sensation now is a little bit like tonguing an earlobe, and she can see Archer manfully staring up at the ceiling. "Ugh! Geez! You're not getting hard!"
"Well what did you expect? I lost a lot of blood."
There is a streak of blood on the ground from where Archer had dragged himself into the bed, and the bedsheets are saturated with blood. Blue mana sloughs off in harsh torrents from his body, and his face is ashen, pale. If she doesn't hurry, Rin realizes, they'll lose their connection and he'll be stuck in the wasteland again. Rin furrows her brow.
"I think," Rin says, and her brow furrows. "I think I need to be the one to penetrate you."
Archer's eyes widen. "You cannot be serious," Archer says.
"I'll use one of my vibrators," Rin says, and she jumps up, running across the bedroom. There is a look of horror on Archer's face as Rin rummages through her dresser.
"Rin," Archer says, and he scoots up against the headboard, pulling up his pants. "You know I love you and I appreciate the sentiment, but if you come anywhere near me with that thing, I will defend myself."
"Don't worry, Shirou, this one's small." She holds up the purple dildo, showing him. "It's barely the width of my fingers, it'll be fine. I'll be gentle. I'll use lube."
"Rin," Archer says, and he stands from the bed, holding up his hands. "This is unnecessary! I am not that injured."
"You're dying," Rin says, and she starts toward him.
"Do not do this," Archer says, and he grabs a lamp and holds it out toward her.
"Are you really going to hit me with that lamp?" Rin says.
"No, but I can knock that thing out of your hand," Archer says, and he wobbles. Rin stares.
"Look at you! You're going to pass out," Rin says. "Dammit, Shirou, quit being a baby! Lie down!" she says, and she shoves him back against the mattress. "Do you think I want to do this?" Rin says. She holds the vibrator against her chest like a crucifix, tears pricking the corners of her eyes. "I don't want to do this anymore than you do! But if I don't-" and she squeezes her eyes, willing herself not to cry. "If I don't, Shirou...Shirou you'll fade away!"
"Is that what this is about?" Archer says, incredulously. "Rin. Our connection is fine."
"You're sloughing off mana, our connection is fading!"
"I'm not your Servant, Rin," Archer says. "I'm a guardian. This is normal for me."
"But my mana is giving you shape and form-" Rin starts, but Archer shakes his head.
"The world is giving me shape and form. All you've done is tethered me here."
"So you're not going to disappear?"
"No," Archer says. Rin's shoulders shake. Her face crumbles.
"I was so scared!" Rin says, and she starts to sob. Archer hugs her, pulling her on top of him. "I've never seen you so hurt like this! I didn't want to lose you!"
"It's okay, just...put that thing down," Archer says, and they both look at the purple dildo Rin is clutching in her hand.
xXx
.
Somehow, in the midst of all of this, Rin manages to fall asleep.
He's still there when she wakes. It's dark in the early morning, but she can see the mana seeping from his wounds has already closed. The bruises on his skin have started to recede, and pink, translucent scars criss-cross his chest and shoulders. She can feel the hard raised scabs under her thumbs.
"How are you feeling?" Rin asks. Archer smiles.
"Better," he says. "Another day or two and I should be fully healed."
"It's my fault, isn't it?" Rin says. "If you were in the wasteland, you'd heal quicker."
"True," Archer says. "But it's just as well I'm not healing quickly, anyway. As soon as I'm healed, the world will just send me back there again. I'd rather not go there until I formulate a better plan."
"So they'll just keep sending you back?" Rin says. "Over and over again?"
"At least until I am able to kill them."
"That's awful," Rin says. She feels him gently stroking her hair.
"Ne, Shirou," Rin says. "How do you think Masters sleep with Servants, anyway? It doesn't seem to work."
"Under the right circumstances, it should work just fine. Knowing that your Master will heal you, no matter how injured. It is a wonderful motivator," Archer says.
"Really?" Rin pushes herself up on her elbows to look at him. "Would you have slept with me back then? During the war?"
"Do you mean as I am now, or when I was younger?"
"When I summoned you," Rin says. Archer shakes his head.
"No," Archer says. "I wouldn't want to take advantage of you."
"Even if you were dying?"
"Especially if I were dying."
"Huh," Rin says. She furrows her brow.
"What about, if the war was going on now, and I summoned you. And everything is the same except I'm older. Would you sleep with me then?"
"Is my younger self there or no?" Archer says.
"Uh, he's roaming the desert. Like a moron."
Archer frowns. "Truthfully? I'd probably be more focused on erasing myself," Archer says.
"Well, okay! Let's say you weren't suicidal and your younger self decided to be a manager at Starbucks or something, and everything is okay except there's the war. Would you sleep with me then or not?"
"I sleep with you now, I do not understand this line of questioning," Archer says. Rin glares.
"I'm just wondering!" Rin says. Archer sighs.
"I suppose I probably would sleep with you, if my mana were depleted. You are a grown woman. I would not feel as bad using you."
"'Using me?'" Rin says. Archer shrugs.
"It would not be a love-based relationship," Archer says. "Merely a Master replenishing her Servant. And I would caution you not to develop feelings for me, as the duration of the summoning would be inherently limited."
Rin grins at him. She punches him in the arm.
"But you would fall in love with me, right?" Rin says. She kisses his ear. "You'd want to protect me even more."
"I would let you think that, so you'd be more willing to replete my mana."
"You're such a jerk," Rin says, smiling. She settles against his chest, then peers over the bed.
"Damn," she says, and she sees the huge puddles of blood streaking up and down the carpet. "You think that'll disappear when you get summoned?"
Archer sighs, tragically.
"That is why I asked you to take me to the bathroom."