11.
Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone
"I cannee believe we never watched this sooner!" Scotty grins – "I love these movies – spent most of my childhood waiting for my Hogwarts letter to arrive!"
"Heartbroken when it never came Scotty?" Kirk eans back to grin at him, eyes sparkling.
"No Captain – I did get one you see, eleventh birthday. Course I was heartbroken later when I realised it was my mam that had sent it."
Not talking throughout the Harry Potter movies was apparently an impossibility for all but Spock, these stories were such an integral part of every human crew member's childhood. Before long the crew have missed over half the movie in debating what house they would have been sorted into.
"Well I'm clearly Gryffindor" Kirk finally states and nobody argues it.
"Hufflepuff and proud!" Scotty pronounces firmly.
Sulu says nothing, just sits, innocently watching the screen, trying to pretend they don't all know he's a Slytherin and somewhat gleeful about it. Uhura raises an eyebrow at Chekhov when he says he never did know where he'd fit in –
"Really? You never went on Pottermore?" she grins – "I had you down as a fellow Ravenclaw myself."
"What is Pottermore?" Chekhow frowns. They throw things at him and boo.
"What about you Bones?" Kirk smiles.
"Sort me into the house of could not care less" Bones grumps, not wanting to admit to having ever thought about it and certainly not to being as solid a Gryffindor as Kirk.
"Spock?" Kirk asks next, notices Spock has an expression of extreme, almost far away thoughtfulness – "Spock you still with us?"
"I am thinking Captain –" Spock replies slowly – "That based upon the apparent criteria a strong argument may be made for my belonging to Ravenclaw with Lieutenant Uhura, however I suspect a strong argument could be made for Slytherin –"
"Aha!" whoops Kirk, cackling in a surprising passable imitation of a sorting hat – "You could be great you know and Slytherin will help you on the way to greatness!"
"Indeed" Spock raises a non–plussed eyebrow "However, like our eponymous hero I have never felt a need for greatness, nor any extreme ambition. Indeed, were it a matter of preference I also would select Gryffindor house."
Kirk cheers and Bones grumbles that he is so glad they got this sorted but the film is now ten minutes from the end he does not have a damned clue what's going on.
"That guy has Voldemort on the back of his head and Harry has the Philosopher's stone, he just doesn't know he has it and Snape was trying to help the whole time" Uhura clarifies helpfully.
"Oh" Bones nods – "Sorry I asked."
"Get used to it Bones" Kirk beams – "There are still seven movies to go!"
"Oh" Bones says again though this time it sounds more like an urrggh – "Oh joy".
_x_
Okay this was kinda short, but I think I may want to do all of the Harry Potter movies and I need to leave food for the next few! Plus the sorting of the Enterprise crew is obviously the first thing that needs discussed! I'm willing to hear alternatives to any of my sorting choices and suggestions for relevant discussions to the rest of the movies! :-)