Part Sixty-Nine: Don't Tell Mickey

Mickey has gone to work today. He needs to spend more time there even though he wants to spend that time with me. He has her nagging him to be there. I am home with Yev, Mandy, Ryan, and Kenyatta. I am ironing Mickey's shirts while Ryan watches Yev at the table.

Mandy and Kenyatta are screaming at each other and Yev won't stop crying. I hear something break and suddenly Mandy is running from the room with blood gushing from her nose. Kenyatta grabs her by the arm.

"Come back here, I ain't done with you, bitch," Kenyatta says throwing Mandy into a wall with all his strength. She throws the phone in the hallway at him. He punches her. I don't know at which point I jumped in to defend her, but it happens.

"Mickey ain't here to protect his bitch," Kenyatta says after he decks me. I fight back, but he kicks me in the stomach. He takes me by my sore arm and twists it as hard as he could before finally punching me in the face and the chest more than once. "Stay the fuck out of it."

Kenyatta leaves for the day to do whatever the fuck it is he does every day. I help Mandy up. She is shaking. I want to hug her, but she won't let me. She gets a towel for my nose which is gushing blood.

"Don't tell Mickey," Mandy says.

"Same," I say.

Ryan tries to doctor up my face the best he can, but there is no denying the bruises on my chest, arms, and stomach. I'm supposed to have lunch with Fiona today; she's going to think Mickey beat me up. She already thinks he abuses me.

"Well, that's as good as I can do," Ryan says holding up a mirror.

"How the fuck did you do this?" I ask looking at my reflection. He put enough eye liner on me for me to pass as a rock star, but it hides some of the bruising, but none of the swelling.

"My step-dad used to beat my mom," says Ryan.

"Think Fiona will notice?"

"Do you usually wear eye liner at lunch with your family?"

"No."

"Then yeah, she'll probably notice. Look, just tell Fiona the truth, and whatever the fuck you do avoid Mickey like the plague."

That's not so easy. I leave Yev in Ryan's capable hands. Fiona is expecting me and I don't want to be late. She has the house to herself today. The kids are at school and Lip is probably out committing a crime or doing some new girl.

Fiona has dressed up for our "date". She looks pretty. Fiona kept lunch simple, spaghetti and meatballs. I love it.

"You're wearing more eye liner than me. You look hot," Fiona says.

"Thanks, Mickey doesn't like it."

She hasn't noticed…yet.

"Of course he doesn't. So, I have a date tonight. He's one of my regulars at the diner. I like him, but I don't think it'll go very far. I don't really need a rebound after Mike."

Liam comes downstairs after his nap. Fiona makes a place for him at the table.

"Ian," Liam says.

"Hi, buddy. So what's he like?"

"Normal. I mean, he has an actual job."

"That's not really what you're into."

"No, but it's what I need."

"This is good," I compliment Fiona. I get second helpings. Fiona stops eating after her second plate, but I keep going. She made enough for six people, that's what she is used to. She doesn't know how to cook for herself or for two people.

"Hungry, Ian?" Fiona asks.

"Yes, and I don't know why. It's so good."

"Ian, why is your face swollen?" Fiona asks. Shit.

"It's nothing."

"If Mickey hit you I'll kick his ass," Fiona says.

"He didn't. It was Kenyatta. I was defending Mandy. He beat the shit out of me."

"He is still hitting her?" Fiona asks, "Jesus. How bad does she look?"

"Awful. Why do people stay in abusive relationships? Mandy could do so much better."

"She's been around abuse her whole life. It's all she knows."

After lunch, Fiona and I talk some more as we clean up. We get a lot of things cleared up. She asks me about how everything with Mickey started and why I kept going back after he rejected me. She listens intently as I answer all of her questions.

"Is the sex good?" Fiona asks over a cup of coffee. We're sitting on the couch. Liam is playing on the floor. Fiona has her legs thrown over my lap. It's nice being here like this together.

"It's fucking great," I say with a smile.

"Yeah? So not to bring up Carl's question but who's the bottom?"

I don't answer but I give her a sly smile. Her jaw drops, but turns into a smile.

"You're kidding?"

"Nope."

"Why? I mean, is it because he's shorter?"

"I really don't want to talk about this. Mickey wouldn't appreciate me talking about this."

I don't stay very much longer at my house. I kiss Liam and Fiona good-bye and make my way back. Mickey is coming down the street. I take a wide turn to go a different way to avoid him before he sees me. I guess it's not a good time to go home yet.

I go to the Kash N Grab where the door is locked. I sneak in the back. Kash used to leave it unlocked for me. Linda and Kash are there arguing right now. I stand in between the cooler and the back room and listen to them yell at each other. They haven't noticed me yet.

"You're a goddamn piece of shit, and if you for once think I am letting you back into my life you're the biggest idiot I have ever met," Linda says sounding on the verge of tears.

"I am broke, I was dumped, I got shot multiple times, please just give me a place to stay."

"Absolutely not, Kash. You made your choice. I converted for you. I am a white Muslim; do you know what it's like?"

"Ian," says Kash finally noticing me. I feel standing here like this.

"Can I get something for you, Ian?"

"I'm hiding from Mickey. I got in a fight with Mandy's boyfriend and if Mickey finds out I can't even begin to think of what he'll do."

"You can hide here for a while," says Linda.

"Thanks, want me to throw him out?"

"Ian," says Kash softly. He tries to touch me but I back away. I don't want to be touched by him. "You're so beautiful." I see Mickey outside the window and quickly find a place to hide so he doesn't see me.

"Got any Reese's Pieces in stock?" Mickey asks.

"Don't I always?" Linda asks wiping her eyes.

"What happened to you?"

"Nothing," Linda says. I can't see anything from my hiding spot, but I know Mickey. He's probably checking his surroundings. He always does that.

"What the fuck is he doing here?" Mickey asks.

"This piece of shit came crawling back, can you believe it?" Linda asks.

"Stay the fuck away from Ian and we won't have a problem," Mickey says, "Got any flowers? Linda, you're into this type of shit. I wanted to get something for Ian when I save up my money. Would you help me?"

"Sure," Linda says, "I have daisies, will those work today?"

"I guess. I don't really know."

What does Mickey want to get for me? Is it a ring? It can't be he's already married.

"Thanks," Mickey mumbles out before he leaves. I come out of my hiding spot and probe Linda for information on what she's helping Mickey pick out for me.

"I'm not going to say," Linda says.

I linger around the store and out of habit start cleaning up and putting things away. Kash follows me around like a shadow. When he corners me he touches my shoulders and presses his lips to my neck. I push him off me.

"No."

"You used to love it when I did this," Kash says touching my chest. I elbow him in the stomach.

"Get off me."

I leave. I need to find a new hiding place. Kash chases me into the street and begs me to take him back. "Fuck off, Kash," I say.

I walk away. I stop outside a bookstore a peek in. Mickey? Why would Mickey go in a book store? "Ian?" says Mickey on his way out. He has stuff in bags. It looks like he took half-a-day at the Alibi then went shopping.

"Hi," I say, not looking at Mickey.

"What happened to your fucking eye?" Mickey asks. He grabs me by the shoulder and spins me around to face him. He notices they're both swollen. "What the fuck? Who did this?" When I don't answer Mickey lightly shoves me and I wince from him touching the bruises on my chest. "The chest too. Who the fuck did it, Ian?"

"I was defending Mandy. She shouldn't be with that guy."

"I'm going to fucking kill him."

And I can't talk to Mickey right now. He barely hears me. He marches home where Kenyatta is sitting at the table while Mandy cooks for him. Everyone is home. Mickey slaps Kenyatta on the shoulder.

"You touch him?"

Kenyatta smirks. Bad move. Mickey knocks him out of his chair and pins him to the ground. Kenyatta could get up if he tried. He's a lot bigger than Mickey, but Mickey is the better fighter. Mickey punches him over and over. He's not letting up and no one is stopping him. Mickey's punches and fighting gets more violent with each hit.

"Mickey, you're going to kill him," Mandy yells. And she's right. Kenyatta is losing consciousness. Finally, Ryan pulls Mickey off Kenyatta. He's barely breathing. When he does breathe he sounds weak and chopped.

Mickey wipes the blood off his hands and pulls me in for a possessive kiss. He wraps his arms around me entirely, and I deepen the kiss. When it's over Mickey gives me the three daisies and the box of candy. I kiss him on the cheek.

"Get the fuck out of my house. You touch Ian again and I won't just beat you within an inch of your life. I'll fucking kill you. You touch my sister again and I'll get my fucking brothers and my cousins and we'll kill you. You have until sunset to get your shit and get the fuck out of my house."

Tonight, Mickey comes to the club to watch me dance. He acts the part of half-body guard half-jealous boyfriend. Any guy who gets too close must face up to Mickey and he almost broke some guy's hand again. I get a break from dancing and Mickey gets a little grabby.

"You should wear these fucking shorts home," Mickey says sliding his fingers from the bottom of my thigh to the part of my leg that meets my crotch; he's doing this over and over very slowly. I straddle him as I kiss him. His hands are firmly gripping my ass and I am grinding against him. I feel him get hard. The make out session gets steamier and Mickey and I find ourselves in the bathroom going at it hard and fast. "Please wear them home." I bite Mickey hard and he comes all over the floor of the bathroom. I finish too and lean against him.

"Is this a fucking porno that I'm missing?" asked some guy outside the stall.

"Fuck off," Mickey says.

"You two must fuck like porn stars," says the man.

"I take that a compliment," I whisper in Mickey's ear before groping him again. He begs me for it. We go at it again. I know that guy is still listening, but it doesn't bother me as much as it does Mickey who threatens him.

"There is a fucking porno in here," He starts telling people outside the bathroom in his big, queen-y voice. "It's turning me on."

"I can't do this," Mickey says after the second time.

"But I'm having so much fun," I tell Mickey and I make it worth a third round by rubbing my leg against him again.

Mickey and I do our fourth round in the back of the uber on the ride home. The driver is less than thrilled, but he's getting paid a lot to do this so who cares. At Mickey's house we end up just spooning for the rest of the night. I'm worn out from work and having fun time with Mickey.

"I can't wait until we go to the zoo tomorrow," I tell Mickey who is kissing the freckles on my shoulder. "A real date."

"We go on real dates all the time," Mickey says.

"Not like this," I tell him, "Not where I get to boast about having a sexy boyfriend."

"Sexy? We should have your eyes checked. I'm the one with the sexy boyfriend," Mickey says. He thinks I'm sexy?

"I saw Kash today," I tell Mickey. Should I ask about the gift he wants to get me?

"Did he touch you?"

"Yeah. I told him to fuck off."

"Good," Mickey kisses me on the arm. He snuggles into me and goes to sleep. I stay awake and listen to him breathing for a while.