I can hardly bring myself to sit at my station to dive into the Replayer anymore and it's not only because Eren Jaeger is dead. Sure, his death brought another dimension to the Replayer; I'll have to witness his death and Levi's death. I realized I wasn't ready for it. It might not have been anytime soon, but I couldn't know when he'd die and how he would. I didn't want to deal with it anymore. It became an apprehension, but I still managed to be interested in the Replayer and I was actually looking forward to seeing Eren in the Replayer while he was there... It felt like I needed to see him eventually and I ignored that impression because it was unsettling. That, plus Hanji's instruction brought an additional dimension to the Replayer; Invasion of Privacy. I was looking forward to it, I was looking forward to seeing them even if it was an invasion of privacy. Whenever Eren offered a good sight, Levi would stare more and more each day as he became conscious of the boy. Levi would look at Eren. He'd take a glance. He actually liked watching Eren. I liked it too. He wasn't sure how to interpret it, but he liked it when Eren was the one rushing to spend some time with Levi to end up as flustered as ever. I liked it too. He probably tried to make a move, but Levi would destroy his plans each time. He couldn't possibly let this happen even if he felt like letting it happen. I wanted it to happen. I was looking forward to Eren finding every opportunity to be with the Corporal... Alone.

I felt like I was chasing after a ghost.

Eren didn't exist in my world, but I got my fix in the Replayer and didn't think about Privacy until I started to literally skip through a lot of time to do my job as Hanji asked of me. I started to think about it because I would play the scenes with Eren the most... I was a stalker.

I am stalking a dead boy through some kind of 'Time-Machine.'

I feel the worst about it. About myself. I'm not a stalker. I'm not invading their privacy at all. I tell myself whatever I can to feel better. In the end, getting into the Replayer still bothers me. I can't wait to get in. I can't wait to see him. It's not healthy, but I can't wait and I still got into the Replayer this morning. I did it and it could have been fine.

However... It went too far. I went too far.

-X-

Authenticating… Replayer: Rivaille, Password: Heychou

Success!

Opening Session no. 06-22

Resuming Memory

She could have been mistaken for a Princess from a tale; sleeping and waiting for a Prince to wake her up. She wears the peaceful expression she had ever since she lost and turned to crystal. She remains frozen in time without moving and there's no way to break her out. No way to learn anything about it or about her. Crystal or not, Annie Leonhart is a dangerous threat to Humanity and, more importantly, to Eren.

They couldn't take the risk of the Sleeping Beauty waking up from her slumber to go on a killing spree again so they assigned guards to her at all times... kind of like Levi is watching over Eren. When Levi enters the room in the dungeon where they've put the crystal, the soldier acknowledges him with greetings followed with a 'sir!' in a similar way that Eren does, but.. Yeah, it really doesn't feel the same. Hanji works at some weird device close to the crystal before she turns around with her usual excited expression.

''Levi! YOU HAVE TO SEE THIS!... or rather, hear this!''

It echoes in the room and it's even more annoying, but he walks forward anyway. There's a little nod for the soldier to acknowledge him before he tells him to go ahead and take a break while Hanji and him are there... but it's not like Annie wouldn't be trouble anyway if she turned back. Hell, he managed to hold his ground against her in the past, but right now wouldn't be a good time to have a fight with her. Not with his injury. Sure, Hanji is there and she's good, but she is reckless and it wasn't a good idea against Annie. The girl was good. Really good.

''What do you want, shitty glasses?'' he asks as he gets close enough to touch the cold surface of the crystal. He didn't expect it to actually be cold when he first touched it. He thought it would be hot just like Eren's body temperature... No, he didn't learn that out of personal experience! He learned it from Hanji, no worries. He wasn't going to experience it, no.

...he did think about it though, but that is something he'd rather keep to himself.

''Come here!'' she asks, but she's dragging him by the arms anyway and shoving something against his ear suddenly. There was no need to ask anything if that was her intention, but that's what you usually get from Hanji... He's about to mention it just because he's annoyed by her behavior. Always is.

...but never mind that.

There's a sound coming out of the device. It beats like a drum. Like a Hammer. Like...

''Her heart.''

The words flow out of his mouth following his thought and Hanji's eyes light up with excitement when he says it before she can tell him. Her lips curl in a smile.

''That's right!... Levi, this mean so much; She's alive! It's like she's going through hibernation or some other dormancy state where she suppresses her metabolism and sleeps to protect herself and have better survival chance. It's similar to animals!''

''How long does this last?''

Levi's still listening to the slow paced heartbeat in the crystal. There might be a chance for them to get the girl and get answers from her if she wakes up from her sleep and gets out of her crystal shield.

''No idea. Usually, hibernation varies a lot depending on the species, the environment and the triggers for it. It can last a day, but... it can also last for months! Maybe years!''

He sure hopes this isn't going to last for years, because they do not have the time to wait years for her to wake up. Hell, they might even die before it happens.

''What did Erwin say about this?''

''He was busy when I went to see him just a while earlier... I couldn't get the chance to talk to him and it didn't seem like good news.''

''When was that?''

''Morning. It was early... I think.''

''How long have you been in this basement, you abnormal woman?! It's late in the afternoon now.'' That's Hanji for you... Not keeping track of time as she works on her weird projects or experiments. The absence of windows in this room surely didn't help, but still.. A few hours do not go by in the blink of an eye. Not to Levi, at least. ''Go! I'll watch over her until the soldier comes back and you'll tell Erwin about this.''

With that, Hanji is off and Levi is left all alone with Annie. It could've lasted a long time and Levi wouldn't have minded that at all. Lately, he found Eren around him way too much. The boy should have been in bed because his last transformation into a Titan left him weak, but keeping Eren Jaeger in bed proved to be harder than they thought. The boy didn't listen at all. Even when Levi came to tell him to fucking lay down and rest, it often turned out to be awkward... and useless as Eren wouldn't listen and use the opportunity to get closer to Levi until he lost it and became harsh with the boy.

Eren Jaeger would usually get upset and drop it.

Of course, when Levi finally gets a moment of peace to think about all of this; Annie, her ability to harden her skin, her ability to enter hibernation and... Eren Jaeger in all of this. He finds himself facing Eren again. The boy is standing in the doorway and he looks like a child caught making mischief by a parent... in this case, he got caught sneaking in a room he shouldn't be allowed in by his Corporal. Discreetness really isn't one of Jaeger's talents, that's all there is to it. He throws a little shy smile at Levi as he enters the room without waiting for Levi to give his authorization. He leans against the door. His eyes switch between Levi and Annie for a while before he says anything, but it leaves Levi speechless when he does.

''What's going to happen to me if I turn crystal too?''

There's a pause before Levi manages to answer that question. It's not that the question itself is hard to answer... it's because he feels worry in the boy when he asks about that and Levi can't really find a way to reassure him. The truth is; he doesn't really know.

''Why in the world would you turn to crystal, Jaeger?''

''I don't know... I don't know much about my Titan abilities and I might do it without knowing... by accident.''

Oh. Right.

''You won't.'' he tells him. There's no way for him to be sure of it, but Eren probably wouldn't turn to crystal by accident. If he did, it would be because somehow... he thought about it. Just like he needs a goal to transform into a Titan, Levi doubts he can turn to crystal by accident. It must be something he needs to do to achieve a goal, otherwise he won't. However, even if he does... Levi can tell him one thing. It's little, but it might help. ''Come here.''

The boy leaves his spot by the door to walk to him, right next to Annie. He's close. He's closer than Levi wants him... but also too far from where Levi actually wants him to be. It's annoying. It bothers him, but he finds himself being even closer as he holds the device against Eren's ear. He notices the way Eren breathes in and then holds his breath... He does it too until he tells himself to actually breathe and stop being stupid. He notices the way Eren's lips part slightly. He notices the way the boy looks at him... like he's not sure what to do with himself anymore. His cheeks take a light pink color and... Yeah, he probably didn't catch up on the sound going through his ear.

''It's her heart,'' states Levi for him. ''Even if you turn to crystal, you won't die and you'll probably be able to turn back after a while...''

''Will you...'' The boy interrupts him, but he stops himself right after he starts his sentence... like he didn't mean to speak in the first place. Levi looks up to him. Yeah, looks up because he's that tall from Levi's point of view. He sees green eyes panic slightly as their eyes meet. He hears him swallow nervously and he knows Eren isn't done talking, but he turns around taking the device away from Eren's ear... until the boy catches his wrist and then opens his mouth again : ''Will you wait for me to turn back if I do?!''

''...What?''

It comes out of his mouth before he thinks about it. He heard that right, he knows it, but he can't help but deny it.

''I want you to wait for me! I want to fight with you... I want to be by your side!''

Alright. He really needs to get out of this, but Jaeger doesn't let go of his wrist yet. He's not done. He won't drop it. Not now. He shouldn't have asked him to repeat himself. He should have told him straight away to shut up about it. He shouldn't have given him the little chance he had to say stuff like that... but he can still deny it and play it like he wants to play it; acting innocent.

''It's not like we have a choice, shitty brat. You're the only hope we have right now.''

...but that's not what Eren had in mind.

''That's not what I meant!'' His voice rises. His grip tightens. His eyes glow.

''Let go of me this instant, Jaeger. And don't make me repeat myself.''

He doesn't have to. The boy lets go of his wrist, but he walks forward and Levi refuses to walk backward to maintain his personal space... Not in this situation.

''Why don't you answer me?!''

''I already did...'' He walks away to put the device back on the table. It's the perfect excuse to get some space and get out of this situation. Eren is insistent. He already knew that much. He liked his determination in the cell when he first saw him. He still does, but he'd rather see it aimed at someone else because, of course, Eren is already going to him when he turns back to face the boy... and it's a bother.

''You didn't! I wasn't speaking about anyone else... I was talking about you and me.''

He's close, too close again.

''Damn kid, shut your mouth already. There's no need to talk about you and me because...''

And then, everything he wanted to say get stolen from him as Eren Jaeger tilts his head to reach his level and pushes his lips against him forcefully. He presses his body forward to squeeze Levi and stop him from leaving. Levi's ass hits the table where he just dropped Hanji's device, but he forgets about it somewhere on Jaeger's lips... between his own parted lips crushed under Eren's, because he was in the middle of speaking when it happened. It's awkward, but he still finds himself sighing against his lips like it took a huge weight off of his shoulders. It's incredibly awkward still. Levi stays still and Eren doesn't do much except crash his lips against Levi's and keep them there. For a moment, they stay like that; unable to move... as Levi stares at Eren's face before finally closing his eyes. It feels like an eternity when they just stand there with their lips against one another awkwardly, but it probably only lasts a second before Eren pulls back in a rush. His face is red. His eyes wide open.

...and Levi stares at him in disbelief not even sure it happened.

''I'm... I'm sorry!'' says the boy in a rush as he takes a step back. ''I didn't mean to do that. I swear, it wasn't my intention... I didn't mean to attack you! I'm sorry!''

...but it happened.

''Fucking brat... Shut up already!''

-X-

It was nothing more than lips touching and bodies becoming stiff from the touch of another in the darkness of a basement lit up by a little lamp. Nothing more. Nothing less. It could hardly be called a kiss. Yet, it made me sigh with contentment when Eren kissed Levi and... Yeah, it makes me freak out.

''Log me out!''

I'm almost screaming. In front of me, Levi's hands reach out for Eren's shirt and pull him forward... and down, because of the height difference to kiss him again. Properly this time too.

The thing is... Levi feels this way about Eren. Not me. I am not Levi... isn't that correct?

''Yes, right away!''

Eren Jaeger disappears like he was never there to begin with... along with his warmth and the softness of his lips against mine. It felt real. It felt like it was a kiss for me. It wasn't. It was a kiss for Levi... I shouldn't even witness this, let alone feel it. I never felt guilty for watching porn in my whole life and now I am feeling bad for some dead kid having a crush on his Corporal... and for enjoying it when he kisses him. It makes me feel like a freak and I can use this as an excuse to log out in a rush, but that's not it.

It is part of it, sure, but there's something way more important; I must be mistaking Levi with myself because...

I am obviously attracted to Eren Jaeger, but it's not simply attraction... I'm fond of him and you could even say; I li... Hell, I like him.

-X-

''Log me out!'' I shout, but nothing happens. The voice doesn't even acknowledge my command.

No. Eren Jaeger is still there and Levi(or me at this point, I don't know anymore) is kissing the living shit out of him... or rather, everything about him except my mouth, but whatever. Hot. Wet. He bites. He licks. Oh god. What the fuck are we doing? This isn't right. I shouldn't be there... Ah. No. Wait.

Damn it, Levi! Move! Don't let him do that... Don't let him open his pants and push them down slightly on his freaking hips... but, Hey guess what?

Nope. This isn't going to happen. Fuck you, Levi. Fuck you, Rivaille.

''I told you to log me the fuck out! At least, pause it!... DO SOMETHING!''

Our lips kiss his navel after dragging the shirt out of his pants to lift it up a little. His body arches to the touch. His head moves back with the movement. His lips open up slightly as he breathes loudly. And then, Levi... or rather, we do something weird; we bury the side of our face into his tummy. There's a little kiss that goes there; in the soft flesh with the corner of our lips and finally... we breathe him.

I breathe Eren Jaeger in like a drug... like a fix to an addiction and it seems to me like such an intimate thing to actually smell him; like the wilderness. It smells like grass. It resembles the smell of green tea... with a light touch of fruits. It's Eren's... and I love it... and I lose myself in it as Levi's mouth travels further down his stomach...

''Daddy!'' Oh god... I dare you to tell me I fucking dreamed this. ''Are you alright?''

No. I'm not, but I keep it to myself. I close my eyes after opening them to her face when she wakes me up. I feel them getting humid again as I come back to reality. You know, Eren Jaeger might not even smell like that for all I know. This is JUST a dream. Yeah. Nothing else. It's not like I know. It's not like I'm Levi and it's not like I remember anything... It's all in my head and it's my imagination running wild, that's all.

''I'm fine'' I manage to say without sounding too affected by any of it... because Eren Jaeger is dead and I'll never be able to confirm any of it. Never. ''I just had a weird dream, that's all. You can go back to sleep. I'm sorry for waking you up, honey.''

She moves back. I feel her weight moving off the side of the bed and her footsteps getting further and further away... then, I open my eyes to the darkness of my own room to take the reality in; Yeah, I dreamed of Eren Jaeger. I dreamed I was Levi. I dreamed of kissing every inch of his skin. I dreamed of foreplay and... actually, I enjoyed it so much I freaked out.

''Are you sure...?''

''Yeah.''

I'll manage.

-X-

''I need to take a few weeks off.'' I say it like there's simply no other way for me. That's just how it's going to go and I already know she won't disagree because she needs me to live as Levi in his memories.

She lifts her head from behind her computer to look at me and she stares like she's judging me before actually answering my request.

''Why is that? Did something happen or... Are you going on Vacation somewhere? With someone?'' she seems overly happy over that last question and she leans forward with interest while I back away from that.

''No, that's not it... I just need to put my thoughts together for...''

''Who is it!? I never thought you were the kind to meet new people, so... Are you going back with your ex-wife? Nah, that's not it. Erwin Smith, then? Damn, I'd been unable to keep your little secret, I'm sorry... since I'm friends with Mike, you know!''

That's it. She didn't listen to me at all. She got way too friendly with me over the months... and I could probably blame her relationship with Mike Zacharius for that, and therefore Erwin, but whatever. This is irrelevant right now.

''No, No and No! I'm not going anywhere on vacation; I just need a break from Levi... and Eren.''

Oh god, it feels like I breathe his name out when I say it and I just hope she doesn't know or see anything from it, from me.

''I'm sorry; I didn't mean to be invasive.''

I nod. I know. I'm just not very patient lately and I don't sleep well, that's why I'm not putting up with her incessant talking. That's why I raised my tone slightly.

''It's fine. I'm not feeling really good these days...''

There's a little awkward moment where she looks at me in that way I hate once again; like she's trying to find any answers or any hints I'd give away, but I remain like that without moving, because I'm going to have this little break. I will.

''O.K., you can have it. You have two weeks of vacation available for you anyway, just take them.''

''Perfect. Do that.''

I stand up from my seat to leave the room, but she speaks again when I'm about to close the door behind me with a small ''Thank you'.' No. I couldn't possibly just leave like that; I have to answer that question again.

''Levi, is everything alright?''

''Yeah.''

Everything is fucking perfect!...