Chapter 2

As always, I don't own any part of Sue Thomas FBI, I only do this because I love to write, and I love the show! Please let me know what you think!

Sue woke up at 5:30 to shower. She knew she was clean from her bath the night before, but something told her a hot shower would help. It didn't. She fed Levi while she grabbed a bagel and a travel mug of orange juice.

"Sorry Pal. No time for a walk in the park today. When I get back." She promised him.

"Hi Luce! I have an appointment. Can you please take Levi to work? I will meet you there. If you have time, can you walk him? Thanks. Sue." She wrote in a note and left it on the table. She dashed out the door, careful not to slam it behind her and wake Lucy.

Morning traffic was hell in the city. She managed to get to the hospital by 6:55. Nearly ten minutes passed before she found a parking spot, leaving her with only a few minutes to get to the x-ray department and get registered. Sue'd never been to that part of the hospital before, and quickly got turned around. She could feel panic start to overtake her. She asked for directions twice before an older woman heard her asking.

"I'll take you." She said to Sue. Sue had her back to the woman, and didn't hear her. Sue was still trying to get someone's attention for help when the older woman tapped her on her shoulder.

"Miss, I can take you. I'm headed there myself." She said. Her smile was warm and comforting.

Sue noticed the woman was tall and thin, but had a regalness about her that caught Sue's eye. She looked a bit frail, tired, but stood straight and proud. She was wearing a knee length turquoise dress with black accents. A turban wound tight upon her head. Sue noticed the turban matched the outfit perfectly. On her right side, in the middle of the headdress, there was a pin made of what Sue assumed was crystals the way they sparkled. They were pink and clear and formed a ribbon- a breast cancer awareness ribbon. The woman had a look of determination in her eye. She also had a look of peace.

"The first time you come here can be so confusing. I remember I got lost at least five times the first five times I came here!" She said with a hearty laugh. Sue couldn't help but join her. "Sonogram?" She asked Sue with a teasing sparkle in her eye.

"Excuse me?" Sue said, not sure what she was referring to .

"Why you're here?" She said. "Oh, I'm sorry. You don't have to tell me. I just like to make small talk on my way in." The senior woman explained.

"Oh." Sue laughed in spite of herself. "No. Not a sonogram." Sue said. "A mammogram." She answered, her voice breaking.

"Routine." The older woman said.

"Hardly." Sue answered.

"Do you have faith, child?" The woman asked. Sue nodded. "Keep it. Good and strong." She said, patting her hand. "It will get you through."

Sue walked to the window to check in, but stepped back to let her new friend go first.

"Oh, thank you Honey, but they know who I am." She said as she waved goodbye and walked through the doors that led to the actual x-ray rooms.

"I'm Sue Thomas." She said. A smile crossed her lips as she thought back to the first time she'd said that to Jack. It was the first time she'd ever met the team- met him.

"Do you have insurance Ms. Thomas?" The receptionist asked. Sue nodded and handed her the card. The woman copied the card and asked for a copay. Sue just stood there. The young woman looked up at Sue. "Miss?" She repeated. "If you don't have it today, we can bill you." She said.

"I'm sorry, what?" Sue asked.

"Your copay. If you don't have it today, we can bill you." She explained.

"Oh, no." Sue reached into her wallet for her credit card. "If you're talking to me, you need to look at me so I can read your lips. I'm deaf and can't hear what you said." Sue explained.

"I'm sorry for the mix up. I'll try to keep that in mind." She said handing Sue back her card, and a receipt to sign. "Can you fill out this paperwork, and they'll call you in a few minutes." She said. Sue took the clip board and pen. Nearly fifteen minutes later, Sue returned the board to the secretary.

"Sue Thomas?" A voice called from the door that led to the corridor. "Come with me please." A middle aged woman with chestnut brown hair, cut short, instructed. "My name's Sally. I'll be doing your films today." She said, walking nearly backwards so Sue could read her. Sally grabbed a johnny from a linen closet. After they rounded the corner, there was a waiting area fitted with soft leather chairs and a case full of books and magazines. There were three other women sitting in the small area, most were of retirement age Sue thought.

"You can change in there. Put your clothes in the locker; take your purse with you." She said handing Sue the garment. "Do you have any powder or deodorant on?" She asked. Sue scrunched her nose and shook her head. "I'll be with you in a few minutes." Sally said as Sue walked to the changing room.

When Sue came out of the changing area, she noticed one of the older women was gone. She fiddled with a book, but settled on a magazine. She flipped through it, but didn't actually see anything on the pages.

Sally reappeared in the doorway. "Sue?" She said waving her hand. "I'm ready for you." She said. "Come in." She closed the door behind them. "Put your purse on that table." Sally walked to the computer and clicked on the keys.

"This is your first exam?" She asked. Sue nodded. "Nervous?" She asked rhetorically. Again, Sue nodded. "You're in good hands. I'll take good care of you." She said, clicking once more. "OK. I'm going to shoot your left side first. I'll move your breast to where it needs to be, and your arm. Since you're deaf, I'm going to ask that you look at me as best you can when I'm positioning you. I'll try to stay in your line of sight." She said smiling softly. "If you lose me, tell me."

Sue took a deep breath and let it out hard. "Good thinking." She said. "Take another deep breath, but this time, let it out nice and slow." Sue did as she was told. "Good. Now, hopefully, your nerves will settle for you." She laughed, as did Sue. "This isn't easy to be on that side, even if you're a tech. I've been there, it's nerve wracking!" She chuckled. The tech switched out trays that Sue's breast would sit on for the exam.

Finally, she was ready for Sue. "Slip this side off, let your arm slide out. There you go." She encouraged as Sue did as she was told. Sally lifted Sue's breast and placed it on the cold glass plate. She pulled the x-ray machine down toward Sue's chest. "This might hurt, but do your best to suck it up and stay very still. If they're not clear, we'll have to do them again." She said. There were handles that looked like vice grips on the side to lock everything in place and press her nearly flat. "Put your arm up here. Yeah, like that. Turn your body more into the machine. Good." Sally said as she walked behind a protective glass. "Take a deep breath and hold it." Sue felt the vibrations of the machine and Sally reappeared.

Sally released the grip the machine had on her. "Go ahead, take a step back." She turned the machine and asked her step up once more. She took another picture, this time from the top. When the exam was completed, she had taken a total of six x-rays, three on each side.

"Can I ask you something?" Sue finally managed to get the gumption to ask.

"Sure." She said as she clicked on the keyboard. "If you're going to ask me if I saw something, I can't answer that. I don't read the pictures." Sally said.

"What now? I mean, if there's something…" Sue began.

"Your doctor will send you for more tests. Blood work, a biopsy. After that, it depends on the extent of things, how progressed it is, and what you want to do." She said. Sue didn't seem to like that answer. "I know, that's vague, I'm sorry. Every case is different. You might just have some fat cells linking together. I see that a lot." She said, trying to make this easier for her.

"Thanks." Sue said.

"You're in luck. The radiologist is here today- early. Usually they don't make it in until 11 or so." Sally said laughing as she rolled her eyes. "Go back into the waiting area and I'll get these read for you." She said, bringing Sue back to the waiting area, and disappeared around a corner. Sue could feel her eyes becoming heavy and starting to close. She realized then, she hadn't really slept much the night before. Thirty minutes went by, and Sally finally appeared at the door.

"Sue? Come on back." She said leading the way to the radiologist on call's office. Sue walked in and stood behind a chair that sat in front of a desk. Sally slipped out the door and Sue noticed the regal looking woman who sat behind the desk, wearing a purple and black turban with a pink and clear crystal breast cancer awareness pin.

"Well, hello again." The older woman said to Sue, holding out her hand. "I'm Rebecca Collard, radiologist." She said, taking Sue's hand in hers.

"Sue Thomas. I'm sorry, I thought you were a patient." Sue remarked.

"Yes. I get that a lot. I have horrible arthritis in my left hip. It makes me seem frail. The turban gives people the impression I'm going through chemo, and the pin makes them assume I have breast cancer." She laughed. "Truth is, I wear the turban when I have a bad hair day, and I've had too many friends fight the boobie fight. I wear the pin to honor them." She smiled warmly at Sue.

"Are your friends still here?" Sue asked before she could stop herself. "The ones who fought."

"Most of them, yes." She answered.

"I'm only guessing that if you didn't see anything you would have sent me home." Sue said, her voice shaky.

"You know what they say about assuming things my darling." Rebecca stated. "You're right in that I would have sent you home if there was nothing, but I want to take another look at a spot. I want to schedule a sonogram after all…" She teased. Sue smiled.

"For when?" Sue asked.

"As soon as possible." She answered.

"Now?" Sue offered.

"Are you up for that?" She asked with an arched brow.

"I hate not knowing what's going on." Sue admitted. Rebecca nodded and picked up the phone.

"OK, Sally will get you set up. Are you comfortable with Sally?" She asked. Sue nodded. "She'll do the sonogram and I'll look at that."

XXXXX

Sue lay on an exam table in a brightly lit room. The ceiling had panels of a blue sky sprinkled with puffy white clouds and birds floating across them. Is that supposed to make this better? Make me feel better? She asked herself, feeling out of sorts with herself. Sally entered the room and pulled up a chair next to the exam table.

"OK. Let's get that johnnie off." Sally said, helping Sue off with the top. "Put this towel under your shoulder. It will help with the cold from the steel table, and it will catch any goop that slides into your arm pit." She laughed. Sue laughed too, but made a face about the goop.

"Oh!" Sue exclaimed. "This table is ice cold." She said.

"Yeah, they don't think if those things when they design them, that's for sure!" She said. "Have you ever had a sonogram of any kind?" She asked. Sue shook her head no. "First, I'm going to squirt some of this gel on the area I'm going to look at. Then, I'm going to press this wand onto that area to see what I can see. I will have to press pretty hard, and it might hurt if I hit the mass directly." She explained. Sue instantly picked up on the word "mass", and panic began to set in again.

With a quick motion, the warm gel fell onto Sue breast, and just as quickly began to seep into her arm pit. Sue rolled her eyes into her head and bit her lip to try to ignore the sensation. Sally laughed.

"Told ya." She said, sharing a good laugh with Sue. "After a few minutes, She handed Sue another towel, telling her to wipe off and put her johnny back on. You can sit up and take a minute. I'll be right back." It only took Sally a minute to return. She helped Sue on with the thin layer of material and off the table. "Rebecca will see you in a minute." She said.

"That can't be good." Sue muttered.

"Actually, she insists on talking to all of the women who get to this point. It's her way." Sally said. Sally escorted Sue back to Rebecca's office.

"Hello Sue." She said smiling at her.

"So?" She asked nervously.

"I think we have something we need to look closer at. I don't think it's fat cells." She said softly, evenly with no panic in her voice.

"I-I have cancer?" Sue asked fear gripping her.

"Oh, let's not go there quite yet." She said. "I'm going to recommend a biopsy. Dr. Kerswell will want blood work to check your cell counts."

"Oh my God, I have…" She began. Rebecca took her hands and squeezed them to get Sue's attention.

"Keep that faith." She said.

"What… what if…" Sue began, but couldn't make herself form the words.

"Don't worry about the 'what if's' yet. If this turns out to be cancer, there are options. It's very small, which makes me think you caught it very early." She sighed. "Don't panic. Try to take one day at a time, one test at a time." Sue shook her hand and turned back to the dressing area. The rest of the day was a blur. She drove home, snuggled on the couch with Levi which sipping a cup of coffee that she didn't remember making.

Levi pawed at Sue. She looked at her Black Berry on the table, it was lighting in with an incoming call. Sue casually picked it up, thinking it was one of the team. It was Dr. Kerswell. Sue nervously picked up.

"Sue?" She asked. "It's Dr. Kerswell. I've been trying to get in touch with you." She said.

"I'm sorry. I needed some time to absorb everything." She said softly.

"I have an appointment set up for you for the biopsy. Can you make it for 8:45 tomorrow morning?" She asked. The oncology department at the hospital. It's on the 5th floor." She said.

"OK." Was Sue's only response.

"Will you be there?" the doctor asked.

"Yes." Sue said and hung up the phone. As the Black Berry went dark, tears slipped down her cheeks, and he wrapped her arms around herself and sobbed.