AN: For those of you who like long chapters, this is the longest yet, just shy of 5000 words - there's a lot of exposition though, but hopefully not too much. Let me know what you think? Also, there's some disagreement between Santana and Rachel in this chapter but I hope that people can understand Rachel's point of view, even if they don't agree with it - remember, Beth isn't the only one grieving the loss of her mother. Anyway, here's chapter 26...
Chapter Twenty-Six: Is It Over Yet?
In the days following Shelby's funeral, life returned to a semblance of normality for Quinn and Santana. They were in limbo awaiting a court date to decide Beth's future, but they couldn't put the world on hold until then.
Two days after the funeral, spring semester began at Columbia and, after much agonizing, Quinn had signed up for a full class schedule. There were compromises to be made though. She passed over a seventeenth century literature class that she'd been dying to take because it meant that she wouldn't get out of class until seven p.m. two nights a week. With a lot of manoeuvring, Quinn managed to create a schedule that would largely work around Beth's pre-school hours. She spoke to her boss in the university library and signed up for a number of Sunday shifts that paid a higher hourly rate so that she could afford to do fewer shifts during the week. By taking a two till ten shift on Mondays, and a couple of lunchtime sessions, Quinn could afford to be home with Beth Tuesday thru Friday evenings.
Santana was still adamant that she wasn't returning to school and she had taken on as many daytime shifts at the Spotlight Diner as she could, to make up for the reduction in Quinn's paycheck. Both Quinn's mom and Santana's parents had offered increased financial assistance, but the girls were reluctant to accept any more hand-outs. Judy was already paying the majority of their rent, and all of their legal bills, and Quinn was worried that the judge would take one look at them and consider them too financially unstable to be suitable guardians for Beth.
Then there were their living arrangements to consider. It really wasn't practical to keep living in a studio apartment when they really needed a two bedroom, but it was painful for the girls to consider giving up the home they loved – their first real home together – when there was no guarantee that they'd win permanent custody of Beth. There was the additional cost to consider as well. Quinn spent hours poring over apartment listings and finding nothing suitable for their needs. Saturdays were spent viewing any apartment that could possibly be appropriate, only to find that the second bedroom listed was actually a broom closet, or that the en suite bathroom meant that the apartment's only bath was in a curtained off area of the bedroom.
"It's hopeless," Quinn complained to Santana after yet another precious Saturday wasted fruitlessly searching for somewhere to live. "We'll never find anywhere within our budget."
Then came a Monday night in mid January when Quinn arrived home from work exhausted, cold, and hungry, to find Santana waiting up for her inexplicably beaming and bouncing on her heels with excitement.
"I found us a new apartment!" she announced in a hushed but animated voice. "Beth and I went to see it after I picked her up from pre-school today and it's the best thing we've viewed so far. Can you blow off class tomorrow morning to come see it before someone else snaps it up?" She went on to explain how a fellow waitress at the Spotlight Diner had been offered a six month gig as a back-up singer on tour with some singer Quinn had never heard of, and was giving up her apartment to take up the engagement.
"She's not sub-letting?" Quinn asked suspiciously. She was determined not to take on a sub-let, because of the insecurity.
"Nope," Santana grinned. "She's convinced that this tour is going to make her career and that she won't need to come back." She wrapped her arms around Quinn's waist and, before Quinn could stop her, she picked her up and swung her around.
"Put me down!" hissed Quinn through a fit of giggles. "You'll wake Beth!"
Santana complied but pouted to show her displeasure. She looked so adorable that Quinn couldn't resist pressing her lips against Santana's and kissing her languidly, only parting when they were both breathless and tingling and on the verge of taking it to a level that would be inappropriate given their current living situation.
"I have to admit, it would be good to get a little privacy back," Quinn mused, playing idly with silky strands of Santana's hair.
"It's a good sign, right?" Santana said happily, her mahogany eyes sparkling and her cheeks flushed with excitement. "Something's going right for us for once."
Quinn rested her head against Santana's shoulder, relishing the closeness and the warmth of Santana's body against hers. More than anything, she was grateful that Santana was back to her usual optimistic self after her little blip following Quinn's run in with Oliver.
They hadn't seen nor heard from Oliver since the funeral, and whilst Santana deemed this a good thing, Quinn couldn't help but be worried. She knew from Rachel that he'd traveled home to Arizona to await their court date, but she was on edge all the time, waiting for him to do something to pull the rug out from under them. Quinn's lawyer, Ethan, had advised them to expect to go to court sometime in late February, and to put it out of their minds until then, but it was easier said than done.
After dropping Beth at pre-school the next morning, Quinn and Santana headed back uptown to take a look at their prospective new home. Beth had wanted to come with them, and they'd endured a tantrum at breakfast and a second one when they'd kissed her goodbye at the doorway to her classroom. Beth had settled back into the routine of pre-school well, and she enjoyed her day once she was there, but getting her to that point was increasingly becoming a challenge. She always wanted to stay with Quinn or Santana and would either become teary and resentful or angry and defiant when her guardians refused to cave. The girls knew that it was a normal reaction to losing her mother but it didn't make it any easier to leave her with her pre-school teacher when Beth was wailing and screaming for them to come back.
"Do you think we should take her to see someone?" Quinn asked as they waited on the crowded platform for the train to take them uptown. "A counsellor, or a child psychologist maybe?" Her arm bore the crescent shaped imprints of five tiny fingernails where Beth had clung on to her in a vain attempt to stop her leaving.
"I don't know," Santana mused thoughtfully, taking a step back as the train roared into the station. "What can they tell us that we don't already know? Beth misses her mom, and she's got abandonment issues. We've got to give it time. She's not going to heal overnight."
Quinn sighed as they boarded the crowded carriage. "You're right, I know, it's just…" She trailed off, chewing her lower lip anxiously.
"Just what?" Santana prodded gently. It took Quinn several seconds of pensive thought before she responded.
"If she's struggling with us leaving her at pre-school for a few hours, how's she going to cope if the judge rules against us?" she wondered.
Santana seemed perturbed by Quinn's question. "I hadn't thought of it that way," she admitted. "I guess we should look into it – but how are we going to pay for it? Do you think she'd be covered under your mom's medical insurance?"
Quinn sighed again, more wearily this time. "I doubt it," she said, wrinkling her nose and leaning against Santana as the train lurched to a stop at the next station and for several moments they were buffeted by commuters leaving and joining their carriage before they started moving again. "Maybe I should give Ethan a call? It can't be the first time this kind of thing has come up. Shelby wasn't destitute, maybe there's some provision for her estate to pay for Beth's medical expenses. Ugh, why does everything have to be so complicated?"
Santana smiled as she tugged gently on Quinn's hair and pulled her close for a tender kiss. "It'll get easier," she promised. Quinn grunted disbelievingly, feeling tired and disillusioned, even though it was only nine a.m.
They reached the apartment building a half hour later. It wasn't much to look at from outside, indistinguishable from the buildings either side of it, and with none of the period charm of their current building. Inside, the hallways were clean and well-lit, however, and the elevator looked decades newer than the one they were used to.
The apartment was on the third floor, which was a bonus – two less flights of stairs to contend with if the elevator should break down, and was situated in a corner plot. Inside, just like outside, the rooms were somewhat featureless, but the large windows gave it a bright and airy feel. The living area was open-plan, L-shaped, with the kitchen units along one wall adjacent to the front door and a glass and wood partition providing some separation from the main living space. The bathroom was behind the kitchen, a small squared off space with a tiny window, and an uninspiring avocado colored suite that caused Quinn to frown distastefully. She had to admit that the rest of the apartment suited their needs though. The bedrooms were small, but big enough for Quinn and Santana's queen-sized bed, and a single for Beth's room. The location was close to the subway, and even a few blocks nearer to campus for Quinn. They'd be crazy not to take it but it was with a heavy heart that Quinn signed her name on the lease. She was going to miss the wooden floors and high ceilings of their first home, the sash windows and the claw-footed bathtub, and more than anything she was going to miss the memories they'd made there.
"We'll make new memories here," Santana promised her as Quinn sniffled, embarrassed to be shedding tears over basically bricks and mortar. She held her close and kissed her sweetly, whispering reassuring words and tantalizing suggestions about how they could utilize their regained privacy until Quinn couldn't help but smile.
They moved in on the last Saturday in January, with the help (or hindrance) of their friends to save on costs. With Blaine, Kurt, Rachel, and Sam helping, the bulk of their furniture was assembled by lunch time.
Sam was great at keeping Beth occupied, he'd moved with his younger brother and sister on several occasions and was quick to think up ways the little girl could actually assist. Quinn sat on the floor of Beth's room and tried to decipher the hieroglyphic instructions needed to put together the new bed they'd bought for the four year old. Santana found her glaring at the instructions and cursing under her breath when the others had all decided to revolt and take a lunch break.
"We're going to the diner down the street," Santana explained, dropping to her knees and wrapping her arms around Quinn's neck from behind. "Come on, you can finish this later." She kissed Quinn's neck and tried to tug her to her feet but Quinn grumbled under her breath and shook her off. "Is this about Oliver?" Santana asked with an indulgent sigh.
Three days earlier, Quinn had received a worrying phone call from Ethan and she'd been grumpy and taciturn ever since.
"What do you mean Oliver wants to see Beth?" Santana asked when Quinn hung up the phone and tossed it forcefully onto the bed in a fit of pique as she relayed the conversation. The brunette was sitting on the floor in the kitchen, wrapping plates in newspaper and packing them into a cardboard box. Beth was in the bath tub, splashing loudly and singing at the top of her lungs – if she'd inherited any of her parents' musical ability it hadn't manifested itself as of yet.
"Ethan thinks that it's a ploy to make it look like he's interested in getting to know her," Quinn explained, sinking to her knees beside her fiancée so that they could keep their voices down. "He's never even met Beth, except for that one time when he showed up here, and Ethan thinks he's been advised that he should try to build a relationship with her before we go to court."
"Do we have to say yes?" Santana wanted to know and Quinn nodded reluctantly.
"Ethan says we have no choice. Legally, he's Beth's uncle. And, since he lives out of state, we need to make Beth available to him at his convenience." She scowled and crumpled up a sheet of newspaper to vent her frustration. "He's in town next weekend."
"But we're moving next weekend," Santana said, gesturing around them at the chaotic half-packed apartment.
"I know, and Ethan tried to put him off but Oliver's insistent. I had to agree to meeting with him on Sunday," Quinn told her, automatically handing her the tape to seal the box as Santana set the last plate on the top. "God, San, I wish I didn't have to see him. He makes my skin crawl, but what choice do we have?"
"I could take her?" Santana offered, but Quinn shook her head.
"Thank you, sweetie, but it's my responsibility," she said with a sigh. "There is one thing you can do though."
"Name it?" Santana said quickly. Quinn smiled sadly.
"Just humor me for the next few days, okay? I don't think I'm going to be able to relax until this visit is over and done with, and with the stress of moving on top of that I'm afraid a might be kind of…" She paused, searching for the right word.
"A bitch?" Santana supplied helpfully. Quinn chuckled despite her bad mood.
"Yeah," she agreed with a grin.
"Well in that case, it's a good job I love you," Santana said, leaning in to kiss Quinn squarely on the mouth. Her hands tangled in Quinn's hair as their kiss deepened, and Santana lowered her gently onto the hardwood floor without breaking their connection. Her tongue swiped over Quinn's lower lip, requesting access, which Quinn eagerly gave. Santana's hand had just sneaked under her shirt to cup her breast when a call from the bathroom caused them both to groan and separate reluctantly.
"Quinn! Tana! I'm ready to get out," hollered Beth. "My water's getting cold!"
Santana lay back on the floor beside Quinn and started to laugh.
"It's your turn," Quinn said, prodding her fiancée in the side, chuckling herself at Santana's mirth. "Go on, we don't want her getting cold. In a few days we'll have a room of our own and you can finish what you just started."
"I'll hold you to that," Santana promised as she struggled to her feet to go deal with Beth.
As Quinn had indicated, her mood had been low ever since that night. She hadn't exactly been a bitch, but she hadn't been able to stem her anxiety either.
"Take a break with us," Santana pleaded, kneading Quinn's shoulders gently. Quinn waved the bed assembly instructions in irritation.
"I want to get this finished," she said crossly, "but I think it's written in Klingon for all the sense it makes."
Santana laughed and plucked it from Quinn's hands.
"Well, then we'll get Sam to take a look at it after lunch," she said lightly. "Come on, everyone's ready to go."
Reluctantly, Quinn allowed her to pull her to her feet and drag her out to lunch with their friends, and as Santana had promised, she asked Sam to help with the bed building after lunch and he made short work of the task.
By dusk, they were largely unpacked, and Quinn and Santana ordered pizza for everyone to celebrate, including a vegan pizza for Rachel that Santana took one look at and turned her nose up in disgust.
Beth had tired herself out with all the excitement and she fell asleep before she'd even finished her first slice of pizza. Quinn picked her up and carried her into her new room, and the little girl didn't even wake as Quinn quickly undressed her and put on her pajamas. It felt strange leaving her alone, and Quinn stood in the doorway watching her sleep until Santana came to find her and bring her back to the party.
"Oh, I almost forgot," Kurt announced, clapping his hands together melodramatically, "Blaine and I finished our testimonials for your lawyer. I meant to tell you, we mailed them in a few days ago. If the judge doesn't give you full custody of Beth after what we wrote, he must have rocks in his head." He beamed as Quinn got up to hug him tightly and even Santana offered him a grateful smile.
"Thank you," Quinn told him sincerely. "To both of you." She gave Blaine a quick hug too, then returned to her spot on the floor by Santana.
"I told my parents what you were going through," Sam piped up through a mouthful of pizza. Santana eyed him distastefully and he waited until he'd swallowed before continuing. "I told them what your lawyer had asked for and read them what I'd written and they asked if they could write something too. I said I'd ask you. They're grateful to you for all your help with Stevie and Stacie when we were living in the motel. They thought it might help to show how good you are with kids."
"Really?" Quinn smiled at him softly. "That's amazing. Tell them yes, please, and thank you."
"Did you finish yours yet, Rachel?" Santana asked quietly. Quinn glanced at her fiancée and there was a strange glint in her eye. Rachel was shifting uncomfortably on the couch, not meeting Santana's gaze and Quinn suddenly felt chilled.
"Um, no, I…" Rachel began, then faltered. "I'm still thinking about it," she said finally.
"What's there to think about?" Santana asked hotly. "All you have to say is that Quinn is amazing with Beth and that Beth belongs with her."
"I'm not sure that's strictly accurate," Rachel said in a small voice. Quinn felt Santana tense beside her and she automatically reached for her fiancée's hand. "I mean, of course Quinn is wonderful with her," Rachel added hurriedly. "And Beth loves you. I'm just… I'm not sure that it's the only option." Her last statement was said in a rush of breath, and she eyed Santana nervously, as though she'd just antagonized an angry tiger. "I had dinner with Oliver last night, and he says he feels dreadful that he wasn't closer with Shelby and Beth," Rachel explained.
"For God's sake, Rachel," scoffed Santana, "it's just an act, can't you see that? He takes you out to dinner once and wins you over? How gullible are you? And where's your loyalty? Quinn's been your friend for years. You've known Oliver for five minutes."
Quinn sat quietly, listening to her fiancée fight with one of their closest friends. Rachel's words felt like a punch in the stomach.
"We've been talking on the phone a lot the last few weeks," Rachel admitted. "Oliver says that he views me as family too, not just Beth. I never had an uncle before. He's got a good job and a stable home, and I really think Beth could be happy with him too."
Quinn closed her eyes and pressed her fingertips to her temples as Santana leapt to her feet angrily.
"So, you're on his side now?" she demanded.
Rachel shook her head, looking anguished. "No, I'm not on anybody's side," she insisted. "But what you're asking for isn't that easy. I'm sorry, Quinn," she said, looking directly at her. "It's not that I think you don't love Beth, but I can't honestly say, hand on heart, that staying with you and Santana is what's best for her. She needs stability after everything that's happened."
"Look around you!" Santana cried, gesturing at the apartment around them as Blaine silently got up to close Beth's bedroom door so that the fight wouldn't wake the sleeping four year old. "We moved houses just to provide her with some stability. She has a room of her own, we take her to school every day and we pick her up afterwards. We feed her, clothe her, play with her, comfort her. What more does she need?"
"I just don't know if the two of you are stable enough," Rachel confessed finally. "You've been together less than two years and in that time I've lost count of the fights and the almost break ups. Raising a child is stressful, it's a lot of pressure, and with everything else you guys have on your plates I'm afraid it'll get to be too much." She started to cry as she admitted her major worry. "I don't want Beth to have to go through losing a second family."
Santana bristled and she looked ready to physically pounce on Rachel. Kurt put his hand on Rachel's arm, a shell-shocked expression clouding his features.
"Rachel, I think it's time to go," he said softly, looking near to tears himself. "I'm sorry guys," he added to Quinn and Santana.
"I'm so sorry, Quinn," Rachel sobbed.
Quinn felt strangely detached from the whole proceedings. She knew she'd have to face these kinds of questions in court but she'd never expected them from one of her best friends. Logically, she understood Rachel's point of view. She knew Rachel had at one point been desperate for a real relationship with Shelby, and if Oliver was offering her that family connection on a silver platter, it was only natural that she'd find it irresistible. But that didn't stop it hurting. Part of her wanted to scream and throw things at Rachel but she couldn't summon the energy. She just didn't have it in her to fight on any more fronts – all of her strength was directed at the court battle with Oliver.
"Do what you like, Rachel," she said flatly, getting to her feet. "It's okay. Excuse me guys." With that said she walked into her bedroom and closed the door, lying down on the cool fresh sheets in the darkness. She heard a few more muffled raised voices, then a few softer exchanges, then silence.
After a few moments the door opened and the bed shifted under Santana's weight.
"They're gone," Santana announced. "Are you okay?"
At Santana's worried tone, the emotion that Quinn had been supressing bubbled to the surface and she shook her head sadly. Without another word, Santana enveloped her into her arms and held her close while she cried, letting all of her frustration, fatigue and anxiety overwhelm her.
The next morning, Quinn tried to put on a brave face as she prepared Beth for their meeting with Oliver. Rachel's confession had rocked her already shaky confidence, but she'd drawn strength from the support of their other friends and especially from Santana. The way her fiancée continued to fight for her was a constant source of power.
"Why do I have to see him?" Beth whined, as Quinn fastened the buttons on the little girl's bright yellow dress and tried to tame her unruly hair with a hairclip shaped like a sunflower.
"Because he's your mommy's brother, and he wants to meet you," Quinn explained for the fiftieth time. Santana gave her a reassuring smile. "Maybe you can ask him to tell you about your mommy when she was a little girl?"
Beth brightened at that suggestion and obediently allowed Quinn to slip her feet into her sneakers.
"Does he have any boys and girls?" she asked curiously.
"He does," Quinn said, holding up Beth's coat for her to stuff her arms into. "He has a son named Lucas, and a daughter named Emily, but they're a lot older than you. Emily's almost as old as me and Santana." She tried to make it sound as though it would be impossible for anyone to be that old and Beth giggled. Then it was time to kiss Santana goodbye and head out for the rendezvous.
"Good luck," Santana murmured, squeezing Quinn extra tightly and planting a chaste kiss on her lips. "Give him hell."
Since Oliver had chosen the date and time of their meeting, Quinn had insisted on setting the location as a small demonstration that he didn't hold all the cards. She'd chosen the play park where she'd first met Beth again, as she knew the little girl loved it and was comfortable there. It was a long ride on the subway but Beth loved the train and was happy and cheerful throughout the journey. As they neared the park, however, she started to drag her feet, scuffing her shoes on the sidewalk and pulling heavily on Quinn's hand, a petulant scowl marring her pretty features.
Oliver had already arrived and was waiting for them, wearing a dark wool coat to stave off the cold. He was standing by a bench, his posture firm and alert. Quinn briefly wondered why he wasn't sitting down to wait, she could only guess that it was meant to be a show of power.
"I don't want to go in there!" Beth wailed as she set eyes on Oliver. "I want to go home!" She gritted her teeth in frustration as she tried in vain to pull Quinn back the way they'd come.
Sighing, Quinn lifted Beth into her arms. "Baby, we've been through this. Oliver isn't going to hurt you. He's just curious about you and he wants to get to know you." Beth looked at her reproachfully, her wide hazel eyes filling with tears.
"Please can we go home?" she asked quietly.
Quinn ignored the question. "I need you to be a big girl for me, okay," she said soothingly. "Just for an hour or so and then maybe you and I can stop by the toy store and see if they have any Princess Sofia toys? Do you think they might?"
"Nooo," Beth pouted, un-placated. She didn't want a toy, she just didn't want to see the strange man whose eyes were so like her mommy's yet scarily different too. She continued to struggle as Quinn carried her into the park, and once again she refused to look at Oliver.
"Is she shy?" Oliver asked after taking one look at his niece, who had buried her head against Quinn's chest. He hadn't even bothered to say hello to either of them.
"Not usually," replied Quinn coldly. "She's pretty outgoing most of the time."
Oliver's eyes narrowed at her obvious barb.
"Well, then, I have to ask myself what you may have said to her to make her so afraid of me," he replied, his tone equally icy. "I'm sure my lawyer will be very interested as well."
Quinn sighed again and made another attempt to detangle herself from Beth. If she weren't certain of Beth's biological make up, she'd think the child was part limpet – every time she detached one vice like grip, Beth seemed to have another. Finally, she realized she was going to have to use another approach.
"Excuse us for a second," she said hurriedly, before carrying Beth a hundred feet or so away until they were out of Oliver's earshot. "Beth, listen to me," she said in a low warning tone. "I know you don't want to be here, but I expect you to behave yourself. Your mommy taught you better than this. Now, let go of me, stand up, and let's go talk to your uncle." As it had done the first time she'd used that tactic, her voice got Beth's attention. She sniffled and pouted but allowed Quinn to set her down and smooth out her clothing. "Good girl," Quinn said in relief, kissing Beth's damp cheeks and drying her tears. "Now let's get this over with."
After much prodding and cajoling, Beth did talk to Oliver but her answers to his questions were short and direct, and in her own defiant way she made it clear that she was only there under duress. By the time the meeting was over, Quinn was exhausted and it still wasn't even lunchtime. She couldn't help but be a little proud of Beth for her distrust of Oliver but she was worried that it might count against them in court. She didn't want it to seem like they'd been coaching Beth to hate her uncle. More than anything it reaffirmed that she was doing the right thing by fighting to keep Beth with her.
Beth too seemed fatigued by the ordeal of the morning as they headed back towards the subway hand-in-hand. She was quiet and subdued, and Quinn wanted to do something to make her feel better.
"I believe I promised you a visit to the toy store," she said with as much brightness as she could muster.
Beth was confused. "But I wasn't a good girl. I didn't want to talk to that man."
Quinn noticed that Beth was steadfastly refusing to call Oliver by his name, and she couldn't help but smile a little.
"But you did talk to him," she reminded Beth gently. "I'm proud of you. You're a good kid, you know that?"
Beth studied her carefully and then nodded. "And you're a good growed up," she announced, and Quinn laughed out loud.