A/N Over 700 reviews so far, and over 50 for the last chapter. THANKS! I'm so happy that so many of you are still following my story and that there are still new readers coming to join the ride.
Well, here now what you've been all waiting for: Bella's and Jasper's reunion after their first day apart and of course the arrival of Rosalie and Emmett.
Just a little reminder: This story is rated M for a reason. So if you are under 18, this is definitely not a story for you.
With that being said … one last word.
Enjoy! *winks*
Chapter 23 A Ride on the Rollercoaster
Peter POV
Of course I'd anticipated some sort of reaction from her, so I was prepared to act and interfere. Before she had the chance to drive her ancient truck into the next tree, I had switched our positions, taking her place behind the wheel. To say that she was startled to find herself suddenly on the passenger seat was an understatement. Her heart was beating like mad.
"Are you alright there, little one?" I asked. I was a little worried that I'd scared her too much with my sudden move. She might have witnessed vampire speed in action on more than one occasion before, but it was obvious that her human senses still had trouble to follow and that her mind clearly needed some time to catch up. I couldn't really imagine what that felt like … it must be terribly confusing. And it would always be like that, though. As long as she stayed human, that was.
"Yeah … I think so." She was clutching the seat with both hands, taking in big gulps of air, and exhaling loudly. Her heartbeat was slowing down perceptibly with each passing moment, but she was still shaking a little from the shock.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to frighten you or anything. But it was the best idea I could come up with on such short notice." I defended my choice of action. "Maybe you should have let me drive after all. Talking and driving at the same time isn't one of your skills. No offence." I added calmly, cautiously gauging her reaction.
"None taken, I guess." Bella grumbled. I had to suppress a chuckle that threatened to escape my lips. I didn't want to make her angrier than she already was. Sure, she was grateful to me for saving her truck from landing in the ditch, and thereby preventing any damage to come to it … and to herself by extension. But it was pretty obvious that she didn't like to be reminded of her human shortcomings.
And somehow I could sympathize. It must be hard for her. We were faster, stronger … and from a human perspective at least more attractive. I got the feeling that she was convinced that we were everything she wasn't. I had to agree on the first two. Being part of the supernatural world had certain advantages for sure, but those were only physical aspects. We were far from better … just different. Freaks of nature, some might say.
Despite the fact that I didn't know Bella for a very long time … only a little over two days to be precise … I still had a pretty clear picture of her already. In the past I hadn't had the slightest interest to interact with a human, but she was truly an exceptional exemplar of her specie. And I wasn't only referring to her quick approval of Charlotte and me. This in itself was out of the ordinary considering we were drinking human instead of animal blood. Yet, she didn't judge us, not even one bit. Her trust in us was simply astonishing, and a little crazy.
But what was really remarkable was how much influence she seemed to have over Jasper. In just a day she'd managed to pull him out of the void, he'd retreated into in the last months, drowning in self-loathing and self-pity. God knows, I'd tried everything and hadn't succeeded. But she had. I was sure it wasn't solely because of her special connection with him. It was simply her … mate or no mate. She had the strange power to bring out the best in us, make us try harder, to better ourselves.
But Bella didn't seem to realize what she was doing, underestimating herself and her enormous inner strength. She was so much better than us, and she didn't even know, couldn't or wouldn't see it. She might think that we were stunning, but the truth was that she was beautiful in body and soul, which couldn't be said for even one of my kind.
Try as we might, the reality remained the same. We were monsters, killers … demons with the faces of angels. Well in case of myself, my mate and my brother it was in fact only the face of angels. The marred skin on the rest of our bodies showed a different picture.
I drove her truck straight to the Cullen house, but slowly, wanting to take my time. I liked spending some quality time with Bella, knowing that I wouldn't get many chances in the future.
"Thanks, anyway." Bella broke the silence between us. She seemed to be a little embarrassed about her earlier behavior, but I didn't blame her. She glanced at me from under her long eyelashes, blushing slightly. I smiled at her genuinely, telling her without words that it was okay. She bit her lip, in a thoughtful kind of way.
"How do you know? That Jasper and I are mates, I mean." She asked, picking up our topic of conversation before the little almost-accident. I'd expected as much, so I wasn't surprised.
"Charlotte's gift." I said.
"Charlotte has a gift too?" She sounded surprised, but mostly intrigued.
"What do you mean too?" I inquired, glancing at her. But she was avoiding my interrogating gaze, playing nervously with the zipper of her coat.
"Oh, Jasper mentioned something about you having a gift of some kind the other day. But he didn't know what it was exactly." Bella replied, shrugging. She tried to sound nonchalant, but it was obvious she was hoping for me to fill her in on my secret power.
"Did he now?" I smirked. At this point I was just stalling, playing with her. I'd already made up my mind. I would tell her the truth, not only because of my plan to talk to her about her blocking ability. I loved her, almost like a sister already. It was impossible to lie to her, even if I wanted to. As far as I was concerned, she had suffered enough from deception by vampires who had claimed to love her. She deserved to be treated better, even if she was only a human.
"So do you?" She pressed.
"Yes." I said, taking some seconds to organize my thoughts before I went on. "The first thing you have to understand is that my gift doesn't work like the ones of other gifted vampires you know. It's hard to explain, but I don't have any real control over it, in the sense that I can't use it at will." She looked puzzled, and I hurried to continue. "You know that Jasper senses the emotions of others all the time if he wants to or not. The same goes for Edward, I'm certain. With the little exception of you, my dear of course. What I meant to say is that they cannot shut it off. It's a little different for me. I can't do either one or the other."
Bella frowned in confusion. "Okay … I'm not sure I can follow … so what is it that you can do?"
"You could say that I have visions." I answered, amending at once, "Sort of."
"Like Alice?" She exclaimed, sounding intrigued once more. Was she really happy to have someone around that had the ability to foretell the future?
My answering growl was low enough to escape her notice. I didn't like to be compared to the little pixie one way or another. Fortunately I kept my irritation from showing in my voice. "No, Bella, my ability works in a complete different way. I assume you already know this much. Alice's visions only show probable outcomes, depending on many decisions, big or small ones. Whatever she can see is never a hundred percent certain … just a possibility. It might make her gift helpful on occasion, but in the end not very reliable. Wouldn't you agree?
"Anyhow … what I'm trying to say is that what I see is set in stone, unchangeable. Maybe that's why I can see the past, too. I don't really know. But the most important difference is that I don't have real visions like Alice. I don't see something like those little 'movies' of hers, only picture proof of settings, like photographs. On very rare occasions I receive more than one at a time. It's hard to tell how my gift really works, what the limitation are. But to tell the truth I've never wanted to try and find out. It felt unnecessary. I'm not like Alice. I don't rely on my gift to get through life." I finished my explanation, winking at Bella. She only nodded in response, obviously still trying to process all the information I just gave her. However, I was pleased to see the trace of a small smile flitting across her face. I took it as confirmation that she … like Charlotte and Jasper and myself … didn't like Alice's meddling with the life of others.
"Have you seen anything about me?" She asked then softly, shyly.
I had to laugh at her apprehension. "No, little one, I haven't. Whether it's because there isn't anything important I have to know, or because you are blocking my ability, I do not know."
She was clearly shocked by my statement. "I'm blocking you?"
I shrugged. "I cannot be sure of course, but it is a possibility I have to consider, since Jasper's gift doesn't seem to work on you all the time. And you've always been able to block Edward's mindreading ability, so I guess your gift is still evolving, only getting stronger with time. It does make sense. Why would you only be able to block out one specific gift and not others as well?" I pointed out. She didn't oppose me, probably because she had no argument against my assessment.
"Do you think that Alice isn't able to see me anymore either?" She asked, sounding anxious. Why?
"There is a good chance that she doesn't. But the more important question is do you want her to see you or not?" I asked in return.
"No, I guess I would feel better if she doesn't." She said, dropping her gaze. Did she feel guilty? About what? Her bond with Jasper? She had no reason to feel that way, because she'd done nothing wrong. Before I could voice any of my questions she beat me to the punch.
"Peter, why didn't you tell Jasper about your gift? I mean he is your best friend and all …" She trailed off. She wasn't criticizing me, just wondering about my reasons to keep it a secret.
"Well … it's a rather long story. It has something to do with our shared past." I began, not sure if I should continue.
"You mean when you were with Maria during the vampires wars." She assumed correctly.
"He told you about that?" I asked. I was surprised, but glad. It would make things easier for me.
"Yes, last night." She said, giving me a soft, sympathetic smile. It almost looked like she wanted me to give me a hug too. I would have liked that, but now wasn't the right time, so I just returned her smile with one of my own. I didn't know how much she knew, but even a small amount of insight would be good enough.
"At first I didn't realize that I had this so-called gift … actually it took a very long time to figure it out for myself. I thought I was going nuts … getting all these strange, confusing pictures, not knowing what they meant or where they were originating from. All I knew was that they were not my memories.
"And when I finally did solve the mystery, I knew it would be wiser to keep it to myself. Maria was and probably still is very driven. That's putting it rather mildly … she's always looking for vampires with special abilities, in order to expand her domain. I guess it was a good thing that I was an excellent fighter otherwise I wouldn't have made it past my newborn year. That's why I never had a reason to use my gift as a bargaining chip, in order to survive." I grinned. I've always been a cunning bastard. That's one thing that would never change. "I actually kept it a secret for a very long time. I told Charlotte about it only after our escape from that hell hole in Texas. It was safer this way. But anyhow … I was always under the impression that Jasper had suspected something even back then. I don't know why he hadn't said anything. He was in the position to force me to confess, but he never did. Jasper's decisions saved my life more than once." I conceded.
"He has a good soul." Bella simply said, smiling wistfully. I couldn't agree more. Too bad Jasper wasn't able to see that too. Maybe in time …
Just then we reached the junction leading to our final destination. I drove down the overgrown lane towards the Cullen mansion. At this point she was practically bouncing in her seat. I wasn't faring that much better, having been apart from my mate for almost half a day had taken its toll on me as well. It was easy to tell that we both were happy and eager to be reunited with our loved ones. At last …
Jasper POV
Charlotte and I made our way back to Forks much sooner than originally planned. I didn't mind of course, quite the opposite. After receiving my divorce papers via a third (human) party my mood was at its low point.
My sister was supportive and sympatric as ever, but her outrage was very strong, practically rolling of her in waves. I did my best to fight it off, before it was able to crush me. Fortunately, for both of us, Charlotte managed to rein in her anger pretty quickly, thereby allowing myself to calm down. I was sure that she wouldn't have appreciated if I'd done any damage to her new car, which was rather nice in my opinion.
Of course, she wanted me to talk about it, to help me, but I declined her generous offer … for the moment. I wasn't ready to talk about any of it, not yet anyway. It was all too fresh in my mind. I needed time to come to terms with it before I could share my thoughts with somebody else. She understood, and immediately agreed to skip the shopping part of our trip. It wasn't like either one of us needed something that desperately.
Charlotte spared me one last look before she diverted her eyes back to the road, leaving me to my own thoughts.
I leaned back into the seat, and closed my eyes.
What a fucking mess … I was just what I needed, another blow, when I was already down … physically and mentally hurting. Thank goodness, that the fucking pain in my chest seemed to lessen marginally but steadily with each mile we were getting closer to Forks.
I wasn't exactly angry or sad, just disappointed. Maybe I didn't have the right to feel this way, but still I'd expected more from my so-called wife … correction ex-wife. But apparently I wasn't worth speaking to in person. And maybe there wasn't anything more she needed to say to me. Her message was plain and simple. It was over between us. While I was still drowning in self-pity and self-loathing, Alice had made the final decision about the ending our relationship without me and had sent the papers to the only person she knew I would contact sooner or later.
My mind went back to my earlier meeting with Jenks. A small smile flitted across my face …
When Jenks handed me the envelop it was clear that he was unaware of its contents. He was too relaxed. Well as relaxed as he could be under the circumstances. The fact that he was in the presence of a vampire, unknowingly though, always had him on edge.
My first reaction was purely instinctual. I growled, low and deep, but apparently still audible to a human ear. It was very clear I'd scared Jenks more than usual. The color had drained from Jenks' face, and I was able to sense more fear emanating from him than before. He was shaking like a leaf, cowering into his seat behind the desk.
He looked at me pleadingly, almost like he was trying say. 'Please don't shoot the messenger …'
Fortunately for him and me, I was able to get a hold of myself rather quickly. I sent him some calming waves, and assured him with words that everything was fine. I even thanked him for keeping 'my mail' until today. He might have been a little curious about the contents, but my reaction was answer enough. It wasn't good news. His strong sense of self-preservation prevented him to ask any unpleasant questions, though.
After that I kept our meeting short and strictly business, just giving him the needed instructions for my new ID and credit cards, just like I'd planned to in the beginning. Right now it did come in handy that I'd decided to keep a separate account from the Cullens the entire time. Jenks promised to have everything ready by the end of next week.
Before I left his office, I made on final request. I made it very clear that he was to inform me immediately if anybody else was asking about me or my whereabouts. I knew he wouldn't dare to disappoint me …
I sighed. Maybe Charlotte was right after all. I should take solace in the fact that I was now officially a free man. I wasn't even sure what I would have done, if Alice hadn't beaten me to it. Retaking my name was pretty much the same thing as filing for divorce.
But still I couldn't shake off this feeling of betrayal. Even if she'd felt that way the least she could have done was try to find me, and show me some decency by talking to me in person. Instead she took the easy way out, avoiding any kind of confrontation. I'd never pictured her for a coward. What did she expect? That I would put up some sort of fight? Resort to violence? Hardly. I would never lay a hand on her that way.
But on the other hand, I wasn't really free of blame either. I'd jumped into this relationship with Bella without being legally free. Someone else might consider it a mere technicality but I felt differently. I'd always prided myself as a man of dignity.
I should feel bad about committing adultery, but the truth was that I didn't, because there were stronger forces at work here, forces I wasn't able to fight, even if I'd wanted to. And of course, I didn't want to. Bella made me happier than I could have dreamed of. Alice has never been able to do the same in all those years we'd spent together. I took some comfort in that fact.
We drove back in total silence. I could sense Charlotte's struggle the entire time. She wasn't exactly a chatty person, but this awkward silence between us was unsettling her. But she didn't say anything, leaving me alone with my thoughts. I was grateful for my sister's endless amount of understanding and love. It almost rivaled Bella's capacity for doing the same … almost. The only difference between them was that Bella would show anybody, even a complete stranger the same courtesy, whereas Charlotte only felt this way about Peter and me … her family. I didn't know if it was because Bella was still human, and had a beating heart. But I doubted that. I was sure it was just her. Simply Bella.
Charlotte and I made quick work of our little redecorating project, switching my couch with the four-poster bed from the guest room. We even added one of the dressers. It was big enough to hold all of my clothes, well all the ones I was keeping anyway. I got rid of more than 75%. All those stupid dress shirts and fancy pants, that Alice had bought me, were going to Good Will now.
In my opinion, the Cullens always had too many clothes, and the wrong ones at that. Jeans and a T-shirt was all I needed … and of course my favorite pair of cowboy boots. True it was nice not to think about money, but there were better ways to spent it. I was glad that Bella wasn't a fashion junkie either. In fact, I could vividly remember more than one time when I'd felt her annoyance about Alice's persistence to take her on one of her crazy shopping sprees. But being Bella, she had never complained openly, not even once. Always eager to please …
I thought this whole redecorating thing was sort of fun, although this was supposed to be a short visit, quick in and out. But now it seemed to become more like a permanent solution … well at least as long as Bella was still in high school. I would never be able to leave her side.
But I wasn't sure if it was a good idea to stay in this house. Maybe I should look for a place of my own for the duration of my stay in this town. This house held to many bad memories, for everyone involved. And truthfully, I didn't feel quite comfortable staying here without the knowledge and consent of Carlisle and Esme. After all this was still their house. It made me feel like a trespasser, even though I'd used to call this my home too … once upon the time. But deep down I'd always felt more like a guest than a true family member.
And speaking of true family, I got the feeling that Peter and Char would like to return home, back to their secluded little house in Arizona sooner rather than later. But I was sure that they would stick around until everything amiss was sorted out. I could tell that they both cared about Bella very much already.
After she'd finished changing the sheets and arranging the pillows and the comforter on the bed, Charlotte pulled a package out of her pocket and placed it on the bedside table.
I snorted when I read the label. "Condoms? Seriously? Why would I ever need something like this?" The more important question was why did she have something like this on her? Or did she pick them up back in Seattle? Well at least she chose the right size.
"Jasper, Jasper, Jasper …" She chided, shaking her head in disappointment. "Correct me if I'm wrong but your mate is a virgin, isn't she?" She spared me a pointed look, adding nothing else.
I almost smacked myself in the head. Why hadn't I thought of this myself? True, as a vampire I wasn't able to impregnate a human woman, but coming into contact with my venom could have some bad repercussions, especially for a virgin. For our first time together, a condom would be necessary, if I didn't want to change her by accident. But after that …
"Thanks … I guess." I muttered, still slightly embarrassed by my lack of foresight. But I didn't want to leave the item out in the open, on display practically screaming 'I want to fuck you.', so I went over and hid the package in the drawer of the nightstand. Charlotte chuckled, but didn't say anything.
We'd just finished with the rest of our mission of turning my study into a temporary but nice bedroom, when I picked up the familiar rumbling sound of Bella's truck, slowly coming down the lane. I had been planning to pick Bella up myself, but when I'd mentioned it to my sister she had informed me that Peter was already taking care of it. I was a little upset at first that she hadn't told me, but in the end I was more than thankful of her thoughtfulness. She had sent Peter to check on Bella.
I made my way down to the lower level in the blink of an eye, Charlotte following right behind me. A few seconds later the front door opened and my beautiful angel and my brother entered the house at the same time. And just like that the weird pain I'd been feeling the entire day vanished. A warm, fuzzy kind of feeling took its place. I sighed in relief, and so did everyone else in the room. The combined feelings happiness and love of four people were overwhelming, making me feel dizzy, but good.
But I paid no attention to my siblings and their reunion. I was completely captivated by the presence of my mate. Time seemed to stand still.
When Bella's brown eyes met my golden ones, the smile appearing on her face lit up the entire room. I fell in love with her all over again. She quickly removed her coat and threw it carelessly on the floor. And then without any further delay she ran towards me, jumping into my open arms. I would have easily caught her, but apparently I wasn't prepared for what came next.
Of course it wasn't the physical attack that brought me down, but her emotions … all of them released at once, slamming into me. She literally knocked me over. I went down, taking her with me. She landed more or less safely in my lap, straddling me. She was laughing in pure joy, clearly just as elated to see me as I was to be reunited with her.
Without a word, she cradled my face in her tiny, warm hands and crushed her lips on mine, kissing me like there was no tomorrow. I didn't mind her enthusiasm, quite the contrary I welcomed it. I pulled her closer to me, kissing her back with all I had. Soon our tongues were battling for dominance. I was drowning in our combined emotions of happiness, love and lust.
I barely took notice of Peter's and Charlotte's discreet exit. All of my usually sharp senses weren't working as they should be. At this moment Bella was the only thing I was able to hear, see, taste, smell or feel.
We were kissing what seemed like hours, but it was probably only a few minutes. Too soon I had no other choice but to let go of her sweet mouth. She was gasping for air, but my lips never left her skin. I was hungry for more. I trailed openmouthed kisses along her jaw, down her neck, licking and tasting her skin there. She tasted delicious.
"Oh, God, Jasper." She moaned, tilting her head further to give me better access to her neck. "I've missed you so fucking much it hurt."
"Me too, baby, me too." I breathed against her skin. She shivered in pleasure, grinding her center into mine. I responded with a moan of my own. By now it was obvious how much I enjoyed her brazen behavior. I was painfully hard, yearning for some kind of release. I could smell her arousal. It was sweet and heady. I could hardly wait to get a taste of it as well. My hands went down to her ass, squeezing her cheeks roughly, but still minding my strength.
Before I could take this any further like I wanted to, she pushed herself into a sitting position. First I was a little startled, afraid I might have done something wrong, but I was still able to read her emotions very clearly. She was just as aroused and eager as I was to continue, but I could also sense a slight trace of irritation mixed in with some mischief.
What the hell?
"Now, now Major … not so fast." She told me off, with a grin on her flushed face. Her lips were slightly swollen from all the kissing. She looked adorable. "I should be punishing you, instead of rewarding you … because I'm really, really angry with you right now."
I growled in response. I seemed to do that a lot in her presence, but her addressing me with my military rank was quite the turn-on. So was the thought of her punishing me (even if it was merely a fantasy). I've always had a thing for bondage, a sexual preference Alice unfortunately hadn't shared. I was curious if that was something Bella might enjoy … someday.
I tried to pull her back down again, but she pushed away my hands, pinning my arms to the ground. Of course she was no match for my inhuman strength, but I didn't fight her, curious where she was taking this.
"What have I done to upset you, my sweet darlin'?" I asked innocently, playing along. I hadn't taken my eyes from hers, but thanks to my peripheral vision, I could see that her skirt had been pushed up slightly, revealing some of her bare skin underneath. I wanted nothing more than to free my hands and let them travel up her thighs. But I fought the urge though, remaining immobile, pinned underneath her.
Bella seemed to be able to sense my struggle, grinning evilly. It should have been clear that she was up to no good, but I was too entranced by her, to even care. She deliberately wriggled her hips against mine, using more pressure than before. I tried not to move, but failed miserably, bucking up against her. I couldn't help it. It was a reflex reaction.
"Stop that!" She ordered. "I'll tell you what you've done wrong. You've neglected to tell me that we are mates … soul mates according to Peter. And no, you can't be angry with your brother for spilling the beans." She said, giving me a meaningful, accusing look. Damn, she knew me pretty well. But she was right. I was the one who'd fucked up, not Peter.
Suddenly her demeanor changed from playful to serious. "Why didn't you tell me, Jasper?" I was able to tell that she wasn't really angry with me for withholding that piece information, just a little disappointed. I winced instinctively. And what did she do? She immediately felt guilty for causing me pain, making shushing noises in order to soothe me. This woman was simply incredible. I stared up at her, lost for words at the moment. She gave me a small smile, and then she leaned in again, to place a soft, lingering kiss on my mouth. I responded in kind, pushing every ounce of my love for her into that one kiss. But I felt the urgent need to break our connection prematurely. I owed her an apology and an explanation.
Bella seemed to get the message, and pulled away on her own free will. She looked down at me expectantly, her eyes shining with nothing but love and understanding. I swallowed hard. "Bella, please believe me, I wasn't hiding it on purpose. I'm sorry if I hurt you. That wasn't my intention. It never is. You know that. But with everything else going on … Laurent, the werewolves and Rose and Emmett coming back tonight … well there never seemed to be the right moment to tell you.
"And I didn't want to throw such an important piece of information just at you, without having the time to talk it through with you in peace. I have to admit, there might have been another reason why I'd stalled." I confessed. "To tell the truth I have been a little freaked out at first. Well, not really freaked out, but definitely confused. You have to understand, I'd always believed Alice was it for me. And after I came here to find out that she'd left me for good, I was hurt and began to doubt everything and everybody." I was pleading with my eyes, for her understanding and her forgiveness.
"Jasper, please stop blaming yourself. I understand … your reaction and your decision to wait for the right moment to tell me. I really do, and I am not mad at you. But maybe next time you won't wait so long to tell me that something is bothering you. I am her for you, always." She smiled, touching my right cheek gently, almost reverently. I leaned into her hand, sighing. She was too selfless, too good. I still wasn't sure I deserved her, but I was happy to have her.
"I will." I vowed.
"So really you had no idea at all before Charlotte had told you?" She asked, merely out of interest.
I shook my head, reaching out for her hands, intertwining her fingers with mine. "No, I didn't. Like I've said, Alice and I were supposed to be mates. And as you know vampires mate for eternity, not just for a couple of decades. Whatever it was we'd shared it was obviously never destined to last, otherwise I wouldn't have received my divorce papers today …"
"WHAT?" She exclaimed, pulling her hands free with some force, startling me at first. There was a fire in her eyes that might have scared the crap out of me, if I hadn't felt that her anger wasn't directed at me. I knew this because her anger was quickly followed by waves of pain, self-doubt and guilt. Typical Bella behavior, she was blaming herself for all of this mess.
I couldn't have that. And I wouldn't.
I pulled myself into a sitting position, slightly rearranging Bella on my lap, so that our crotches didn't touch anymore. No more distractions …at least for the moment … My embrace was comforting but casual, leaving some space between our bodies. Bella placed her hands to my chest. Her emotions were still in disarray.
I sent her some calming waves, and to my surprise she didn't fight my help at all, which was good, because honestly I couldn't take any more of her negative feelings. They felt like knives cutting through my durable skin, stabbing right into my dead heart. It was crucial for my own sanity and well-being that she calmed down. And slowly but surely she did. But even though, she still had my shirt gripped tightly in her tiny fists like she was afraid I might push her away after all and leave. Was she thinking that I was blaming her? That's just crazy …
I gave her a small, but genuine smile and I ran my hands over her clothed arms in a reassuring way.
"Please, Darlin', calm down. You have no reason whatsoever to feel bad or guilty about anything. Not even about your little outburst, because that was exactly my first reaction … as well as Charlotte's." I joked, but only halfheartedly. This was hardly a laughing matter. She smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes. She was too tense, still unsure. I took in a deep breath, before I continued.
"Yes. Alice had filed for divorce. And yes she had done so only a month after our separation. But as much as I want to give her a piece of my mind about her more than disrespectful way to get rid of me, I know it wouldn't change anything. Alice is my past, but you, my dear Isabella you are my present and my future." I told her, letting her feel my sincerity. I could hear her heartbeat pick up pace, and her breathing got hitched. I could tell that she trying to fight back tears, her feelings threatening to crush not only her but me as well. I wanted to drown in our shared feelings of love and devotion, but I wasn't finished yet. I did my best to hold them at bay for the moment.
"I'm not even sure if it was indeed love what I'd felt when I was with her. Maybe I'd confused gratitude with love, who knows. I might be an empath, but I'm far from infallible, especially when it comes to my own feelings." I admitted with a sad smile. "But in the end none of this matters. Sure, I will forever be grateful to Alice for showing me that there is indeed another way to live beside the constant mayhem and slaughter I'd been exposed to for almost a century. And I will never regret that I had agreed to go with her, because if I had denied her request, I probably wouldn't be here right now. In fact maybe I should thank Alice for leading me here … to you, my true and only mate. I love you, Isabella, with all my heart and my soul. Never doubt that." I finally let go, allowing her to feel my undying devotion, yet careful not to overwhelm her completely with the intensity of my feelings.
A single tear ran down her cheek, but I knew it was a tear of pure joy. "I love you too, Jasper Whitlock." She sniffed. "I'm yours, only yours, my mate… my Major." She added with a wink. I growled again, pulling her roughly towards me and kissing her with all my passion. We kept on kissing like that for another full minute, until she was out of breath again. I broke contact, resting my forehead against hers. We both were breathing heavily.
"I love when you call me that." I said in a husky whisper.
"I've figured as much." She giggled. "And just so you know I love your response too."
"Then I'm hoping you are prepared for any other consequences as well." I warned playfully. My voice was deep and hoarse. I tightened my grip on her hips, pulling her closer.
"What do you have in mind?" She asked. Her voice was low, practically oozing sex. She had no idea that she was playing with fire. But then again, maybe she knew exactly what she was doing, and was just awaiting my reaction. Whatever, the truth was that I had to fight the urge to take her right there and then, finally claiming her as my mate. I had to tell myself that she deserved better. Taking her here, on the floor, in the living room was hardly the right place for her … for our first time.
Instead of granting her with a verbal answer to her question, I stood up, with her still in my arms. She wrapped her legs around my waist in order to steady herself. I did my best to ignore the heat emanating from her center, so close to my groin.
I walked us up the stairs, in a human pace. "I have a surprise for you." I announced on the way. She frowned at me. "Oh, no, don't give me that look. I haven't spent any money, not even a dime, I promise." I laughed. I was aware that she wasn't very fond of surprises per se, especially the ones including expensive gifts.
"Alright." She conceded with a grumble. She seemed to be somewhat appeased, apparently believing me. And I knew she had no reason not to.
I took her straight to my new room, setting her down on her feet right in front of the closed door. "Go ahead." I encouraged her. I was a little nervous about her reaction, but mostly excited.
When she opened the door, she gasped. "Wow." She was surprised, and I could sense that she liked what she saw.
"I know the room is a little cramped now, but I thought you might prefer a real bed." I said, trying to sound nonchalant.
Bella turned around, giving me a pointed look, raising one of her perfect eyebrows. "So, you think just because you've added a bed to your room that I'm going to spend my nights here with you from now on." She tried to sound reproachful, but failed miserably. Her emotions gave her away. She was impressed and happy … and a lot of other things, but definitely not angry.
I slowly but deliberately closed the distance between us, gently placing my hands on her hips. I pulled her towards me, having to use barely any force. She went more than willingly into my waiting arms. "Well, not every night. What would your father think? But I was hoping at least some?"
Bella smirked at me. "We'll see." She replied, teasingly. She let her gaze wander towards the bed, and then back to my eyes. "How about we take it for a test drive?" She cooed, letting her hands wander over my chest.
For a moment I was shocked by her boldness, but I recovered quickly. What a minx …
"You really have no idea what you're asking for." I growled. I picked her up effortlessly, and flung us on top of the bed. We both landed safely in the center. She giggled at my antics, or my enthusiasm, who knew. I didn't care what the reason was. I just loved hearing her laughter.
I gently pushed her onto her back, hovering over her. I supported most of my weight on my arms, not wanting to crush her, but there still was barely any space left between our bodies. Without waiting for her permission, I leaned in and pressed my lips insistently on her already swollen lips, kissing her senseless. She writhed underneath me, seeking out some needed friction. It was clear that she was truly enjoying herself.
With each passing moment our little make-out session got more heated, leaving no doubt left about where we were heading, if we'd continue on this path. Part of my brain … a very little part … shouted at me, trying to tell me that this was happening too fast, that I should take it slow, maybe even wait, but my body refused to listen.
I wanted this … badly, more than anything. I wanted to claim her, to make her mine. It felt so right. I ached to feel her warm, soft skin against my own. I wanted to taste her, to ravage her, to feel her wrapped around my now painfully hard cock. I could tell that she wanted the same. I felt her increasing desire for me, for my body. Her constant moaning was encouragement enough, but the scent of her arousal, getting stronger by the minute, permeating the air in the room, was what truly convinced me. I could literally taste her need for release on my tongue.
Call me a greedy and selfish bastard, but right now, I was more than happy that she was still untouched … still pure and innocent … therefore I would be the first and the only man who would have her this way. She is mine … only mine …
Once again I pulled back from her lips, allowing her to catch her breath. But my hands never left her still completely covered body … learning, discovering, caressing, encouraging. "You should wear skirts more often." I breathed against the skin of her neck, licking my way up to her ear.
"Only for you." Bella managed to reply, her voice unsteady, husky.
"You'd better be." I chuckled darkly, gently biting her earlobe before giving it another lick. She shuddered delicately. Her answering growl was rather cute. My little kitten …
I slowly pulled back, sitting up on my knees between her parted legs. She was breathing heavily, and her face was flushed from excitement and arousal. She was gorgeous. Her clothes were slightly crumpled and her skirt at risen up, showing part of her pale tights. I placed my hands on her waist.
I raised my eyebrows in a silently question, persistently tugging at the hem of her sweater. I wanted to see her, all of her. I yearned to feel more of her skin. Bella understood my subtle hint, allowing me to pull both her sweater and her shirt off her in one swift movement. I tossed both items somewhere on the floor beside the bed. My eyes roamed hungrily over her partially exposed upper body.
She blushed under my scrutiny. "You are so beautiful." I said, not only because I wanted to reassure her. Fantasy-Bella from earlier today had nothing on Real-Bella. She was only partially naked, but as far as I was concerned she was beyond beautiful … she was perfect. My hands went right for the prize, cupping her lace-covered breasts. They fit perfectly.
Bella moaned loudly at the contact. I rubbed my thumps over her nipples, feeling and seeing them tightening further. She arched her back, leaning further into my touch. I used this chance to reach behind her, quickly unfastening the clasp of her bra. Due to my waning patience I almost ripped the bra, when I removed it. It joined her other clothing items on the floor. For a split second she was shocked, but when I put my hands back on her now naked breasts, she trembled and moaned in satisfaction.
She felt so good under my hands, soft and warm. I still marveled at the fact that difference in our skin temperature wasn't as big as it should be considering she was human and therefore alive, and I on the other hand was a living corpse, cold and hard. True, she was still warmer than me, but not as scorching as I remembered human skin to be.
"Please, Jasper …" She moaned, begging me, desperately clutching the comforter in her tiny fists. "I need more."
I smirked, leaning down to take one of her peaks into my mouth, while continuing to pinch the other one between my thumb and forefinger.
"Yes." She hissed in pleasure, arching her back again.
I teased her nipple relentlessly, changing between licking, sucking and biting, testing what she liked the most. Apparently she had quite a thing for biting. Every time I did that, she let out a loud, lingering moan, further increasing the level of her arousal.
I moaned against Bella's skin. She tasted divine, sweet and heady. I could taste the faint residual trace of her shower gel, something fruity, on her skin, mixed in with her very own aroma. It was intoxicating. I let go of her nipple, slowly moving downwards, my tongue and mouth never leaving her skin. I had to rearrange my own body slightly, coming to lie between her parted legs.
I pulled back slightly, chuckling at her whining protest. I looked up at her face. "Tell me what you want me to do." I breathed against the bare skin of her stomach.
She shuddered again. "I don't know … something … just touch me." She whimpered.
Her innocence was truly adorable. I knew exactly where she wanted to be touched, without her telling me in words. The scent of her arousal was getting stronger by the minute. Today I was going to let it slide, but in the future I would make her say it … out loud.
I reached down to the hem of her skirt, letting one of my hands disappear under it. The skin on her legs was soft, and so smooth. She must be shaving her legs. Without breaking our eye contact and ran my hand upwards, slowly … very slowly. Bella was holding her breath in anticipation, waiting for me to touch her where she needed to be touched the most in this moment. I stopped right at the very edge of her boy shorts. She whimpered again.
"Breathe, Bella." I reminded her, softly. Not wanting to wait any longer myself, I ran one finger alongside her slit. "So wet already …" I moaned, putting more pressure against her center. Bella moaned loudly, sighing in relief. She was a picture of beauty. Her eyes fluttered close, her mouth slightly parted, her face flushed in pure rapture. She bucked her center into my hand, seeking more needed friction.
It still wasn't enough for me. I needed to see her, needed to feel all of her. I pulled my hand away, and sat back on my knees again. I shushed her before she was able to voice her complaint. "I am going to take off the rest of your clothing now, Bella." I said in rough voice, not trying to hide my own excitement. "If you don't want to go any further, please tell me now and I will stop. I promise I won't be mad." But greatly disappointed … I added in my head.
She blushed, but nodded her head. "It's okay. I want this, I need this … please … don't stop now, Jasper."
I could feel her slight embarrassment at the situation, but her need for release was stronger. And more than that, she trusted me not to do something that would hurt her … emotionally or physically. "No need to beg, my darlin'. Not yet anyway." I teased, trying to lighten the mood, to ease her discomfort some. It seemed to work, because she giggled in response.
I made quick work removing the rest of her clothes, soothing her nerves by placing strategic kisses all over her body. I refrained from using my gift on her, because that would be cheating, and not to mention a direct violation of her trust. Of course I could have asked for her permission but I wanted her to feel what she was feeling, not manipulating her to suit my needs. After all, this right now was all about her.
Finally she was completely naked. A slight shear of I couldn't take my eyes of her, drinking in the sight of my mate offering herself freely. My hands kept traveling over her heated skin, leaving goose bumps of pleasure not coldness in their wake.
When I cupped her cleanly shaven center with my hand, she practically screamed out in pleasure. I was thrilled to see her behaving so uninhibited. She was so responsive to my every touch, my every kiss. I loved it.
She was dripping wet. I couldn't wait any longer. I needed to taste her … from the source.
I retook my earlier position between her legs. She squirmed, trying to move away, feeling slightly embarrassed again. But I wouldn't have any of that, holding her hips still. "Just relax and enjoy. I promise this will feel really good." I purred, gently pushing her legs further apart. Her lips were glistening with the evidence of her immense arousal. I leaned in, licking once from her entrance up to her clit, circling the already engorged nub a couple times, before I pulled back.
Both of our reactions were instantaneous and mutual, both moaning deeply in pleasure. She tasted better than any blood I'd ever had. Being so close to her femoral artery, hearing her blood pumping through her veins, should have amplified my bloodlust by tenfold. But it didn't. Sure, I could smell her blood, but I wasn't even the slightest bit tempted. My thirst was of a completely other kind.
Bella immediately moved her hands to my head, weaving her fingers through my hair. She didn't use any pressure, but her message was clear, she was trying to make sure I stayed right where I was. I chuckled.
"Seems like, you do enjoy this after all." I remarked, giving her another quick lick, before I continued. "Don't worry, darlin'. I have no intention not finishing what I'd started." I reassured her, teasing her entrance with one of my fingers. "Hmmm … You are so wet, so warm … so soft." I murmured, entering her slowly. "Ah, and so tight." I moaned in unison with Bella's. "I can hardly wait to feel you wrapped around my cock … fucking her tight pussy until you won't be able to walk the next day." She moaned even louder than before.
So my girl liked it when I talked dirty. Mmmh … that's interesting. I stored that knowledge away for future reference. Right now my mouth was busy. I began to lick her in earnest, at the same time resuming to move my finger slowly in and out of her pussy. She was so tight, but so slick at the same time. Soon I added a second one, slightly increasing the tempo.
"Oh … yes …" She moaned loudly, pressing down, beginning to fuck herself on my finger. I could tell she was close, both by her emotions and by the tightening of her muscles.
"Let go. Cum for me, my mate." I encouraged her, increasing the pressure on her clit as well. When I bit down, gently though, careful not to hurt her, Bella arched her back, and her entire body went rigid. Her walls clamped down, and she released around my fingers. I removed them immediately, only to replace them with my tongue, allowing her to ride out her orgasm on it. I eagerly lapped up every drop she had to offer, groaning and moaning the entire time. I would never tire of this taste. It was pure heaven. I cleaned her thoroughly with my tongue, gently bringing her down from her high.
Then I crawled up her body, claiming her mouth with a searing kiss. She opened her mouth eagerly, and I plunged my tongue right in, allowing her to taste herself. She wasn't disgusted, not at all, if anything her desire picked up again. I pulled away when I felt her need to breathe, looking into her deep brown eyes, shining with satisfaction and love.
"Wow …" Bella breathed. "That was … amazing. Thank you."
"No need to thank me, Darlin'. It was truly my pleasure." I purred, waggling my eyebrows. She giggled. I rolled on my back, pulling her with me. She rested her head on my chest, trying to calm her still slightly erratic breathing. I fed of her satisfied state of mind, but it wasn't enough.
My cock was so painfully hard by this point, not only begging to be released from its confines but also hoping, no expecting some sort of reciprocation. Almost like being able to read my thoughts Bella's hands travelled down to the hem of my shirt, tugging, silently asking me to take it off. Who was I to deny her this simple request? And to be honest I wanted to feel her hands on me again, like this morning.
I closed my eyes, enjoying the feeling of her warm hands traveling over my chest. She leaned in kissing my scars, gently, almost reverently, like she was trying to remove the ugly memories of my past and replace them with happy ones. My mate seemed to have a sort of healing touch. My sigh of contentment turned into a constant sound of purring.
Suddenly her hand traveled south, over my still covered but very obvious erection. My eyes snapped open. She locked her gaze with mine, asking for permission to go on. I simply nodded, not trusting my voice.
Lowering my zipper, she licked her lips reflexively and tugged my pants over my hips, finally freeing my erection.
"Wow." She breathed, blushing furiously.
"I take it you like what you see?" I said, proudly, with a smirk in my voice. As a vampire I was very well endowed.
First she seemed to be a little scared, like she was wondering if it would ever fit, but she certainly did like what she saw. She licked her lips again, causing me to groan. I wanted nothing more than to feel her luscious lips wrapped around my hard cock, sucking me off. "Yes." She managed to get out.
I didn't dare to ask her to give me a blowjob. This was her first time. All was up to her. If she wanted to do it, I wouldn't have stopped her. Bella reached out and wrapped her tiny hand around my stiff member. Her fingertips weren't touching due to my size. But having her touch me this way at all, was enough to lose my control.
"So soft." She murmured, slowly, tenderly moving her hand up and down my cock, using the drops of pre-cum as lubrication. She carefully increased the tempo, always monitoring my response. I bucked my hips, letting her know that I enjoyed myself, encouraging her to use more strength and quicken the pace. I knew I wouldn't last long; I was so wound up tight. A part of me wanted to prolong this sensation, but the bigger part really needed a release, and soon.
Surprisingly this time, a still far-away noise was able to break through the muddled state of my mind. The sound was getting louder by the second, informing me that a car was coming down the lane, only leading toward this house and nothing else. There was no doubt in my mind. I knew who this car belonged to. It was the familiar sound of Emmett's jeep.
Their timing truly sucked.
"Fuck, no!" I cursed under my breath. My frustration was hard to miss, evident in my voice. In fact it was unmistakable in my entire demeanor. I had been so fucking close, my own blissful orgasm just out of reach. I didn't want her to stop … not now or ever. But unfortunately there wasn't enough time left for me to reach completion. I huffed and placed a hand over Bella's, purposely but very reluctantly stopping her ministrations. I opened my eyes and locked them with hers.
Misinterpreting my action and my facial expression, she withdrew her hand instantly, with a frown on her beautiful face. "Did … did I do something wrong?" She stammered, self-consciously as always. I wasn't really surprised by her wrong assumption. It was so Bella. I sat up, pulling her into my arms at once.
"No, my sweet darlin', of course not. What gives you that idea? It was wonderful, absolutely perfect." I reassured her, not only with words, but with a dose of my still intense desire for her as well. To further prove me point, I gingerly grabbed her hand, placing it back on my still hard cock, moaning at the contact. "Does this answer your question?" I purred, challenging her with a look.
She smiled timidly, blushing slightly. "Yes …but I … well … you know …"
I didn't let her finish, stopping her silly rambling with a quick, but passionate kiss. I knew we didn't have a lot of time, before my sibling would come bursting through the front door, but I needed her to get passed her insecurities. "Bella, you have no idea how much I want to continue this. You drive me crazy with your mere presence, even more so with your warm hands and soft lips on my body. I know you don't have any experiences, but it doesn't matter to me. You are just perfect. I love you and I want you … all of you, all the time. Never doubt that.
"But I'm afraid unfortunately now is not the time to prove this statement. Emmett and Rose will be here shortly." I finished.
Bella nodded, sighing. I could tell that she believed me. I could feel her relief, and her embarrassment about doubting me in the first place. "Oh, okay … I'm just … wait, what? Emmett and Rose are here … Oh, my God!" She exclaimed, jumping hysterically out of my embrace and then out of the bed. She blushed furiously … from top to bottom, while she was frantically scrambling around the room to find all of her clothes. I chuckled, but she simply ignored me, continuing her search.
"Mmmh, I've always wondered where your blush would end." I mused, smirking. "Now I know."
She snapped her head up, glaring at me. "Now is not the time for fun and games, Jasper!" She growled, blushing even more under my intense stare. I was practically devouring her with my eyes. And how could I not, she was stunning, gorgeous, sexy … in other words good enough to eat … well only figuratively speaking of course in my case. Her blood wasn't calling to me.
I chuckled again, biting my tongue. I knew in her panicked state it wouldn't be sensible to antagonize her further with another snappy comeback. Instead I finally made it of the bed myself, doing my best to will my erection away under the circumstances, and quickly refastening my pants. I picked up my shirt from the floor and pulled it back on.
In the meantime Bella had only managed to put back on her underwear. She was very nervous, understandably though. We both didn't know what to expect exactly. Everything was possible from acceptance to rejection. I went over to where Bella stood, stopping her mid-process of redressing, and pulling her into a comforting hug. "Shhh, sweetheart, don't stress yourself. Don't worry, darlin', I'm sure everything will be fine." I soothed her.
"If you say so." She grumbled into my chest. She sounded just as uncertain as I was, but I tried my best to hide it from her, not sure if I succeeded.
"Whatever happens, we will stick together no matter what. I love you … always and forever." I vowed. I placed a finger under her chin, tilting her head up and sealing my promise with a soft, but deep kiss.
"I love you, too, Jasper." She sighed against my lips. We both didn't want to but we knew it was necessary that we parted.
"How about you go to the bathroom and get dressed there. I will go downstairs to greet them. Just take your time, and come down when you're ready, okay?" I proposed. She nodded in agreement, very grateful for being giving some extra time to prepare for the coming reunion with her former favorite brother and his wife. We kissed one last time.
While Bella made her way to the bathroom, to freshen up and to get fully dressed, I went downstairs. I picked up Bella coat from the floor by the door, and threw it over a chair in the kitchen. I knew this wouldn't help. There was no way to hide or deny the fact that Bella was here, or that we had been intimate just a few minutes ago. She might be able to wash of my scent, but I didn't have the same option. Not that it mattered. To my knowledge her truck was still packed in front of the house, right on display and her scent was all over the place. Not to mention Bella's heartbeat was the only one for miles. Only a complete fool would miss all those clues and my sister … at least … wasn't one. In fact she has never been easy to deceive. She saw everything. Just like my Bella.
I could hear the car came to a halt, and soon after two doors were being opened and then slammed shut. I stood in the middle of the room, waiting.
A moment later the door opened and my blond sister entered the room. "Nice ride outside. Yours?" Rose asked, dropping a bag by the door. She glanced around the room, but it was more in a reflex reaction than anything else. As far as I was able to tell from her emotions, she hadn't realized that Bella was here. How odd.
"Well hello to you too, I suppose." I said, with a smirk on my face. "No, it's not mine. It's Charlotte's new baby."
She laughed and threw herself at me, hugging me tightly. She was more than happy to see me, relieved actually. She had truly missed me. I returned her hug with the same enthusiasm. It was so good to see her. I noticed her taking in a deep breath, and then she tensed, her whole body went rigid in my arms. She growled slightly.
Here we go …
Rose let go of me, taking a deliberate step back. I braced myself for whatever reaction would come. But she didn't make a scene like I'd expected. She didn't say anything, not a word. She simply stood there, taking another deep breath, obviously still tasting the air. Her eyes scanned the room, looking for more evidence. Like that was anymore necessary at this point. I knew she could smell her in the air, and on me. She also must have heard her heartbeat on the upper level. Finally her golden eyes landed back on me.
"So, Jasper, my dear brother. Is there anything you want to tell me?" She asked, grinning. She knew that Bella was here. But I couldn't sense any animosity, just curiosity and a heavy dose of amusement.
What the hell?
Before I was able to answer her question my brother showed up at the door, carrying three more bags. He dropped them unceremoniously on the floor.
"Hey, bro. What have I missed?" Emmett boomed.
A/N Wow this is my longest chapter … ever. I had to stop somewhere, so I hope you aren't mad for leaving you with yet another cliffhanger. You know me, I like them.
Anyway, what did you think about my first lemon (it's not really my first lemon ever, but the first one of many to come for this story). Did I disappoint?
And did Rose react the way you'd suspected? How do you think Emmet will react? Just as cool as his wife? Stay tuned … until next time.