AN: So I'm back after a few weeks break, sorry guys, I had a week's vacation time during which I was too busy to write and then it took me a while to get back into it. Hopefully a 7000 word chapter will make up for the unplanned hiatus though, let me know what you think. Thank you for all the new followers and comments!
Chapter Thirty-Two: Celebrations
To her immense surprise, Quinn managed to finish up her junior year at Columbia with a 4.0 grade point average. Santana was less surprised, reminding Quinn that she'd managed to get perfect grades all through high school despite grappling with teen pregnancies, car accidents, and never ending boyfriend drama. She thought Quinn ought to have more faith in herself, and told her so on multiple occasions.
Quinn felt that her fiancée could do with taking some of her own advice when it came to her career aspirations, which is why they found themselves one sunny afternoon in early May sitting on a bench in a play park close to the Spotlight Diner, sharing Santana's lunch break and arguing over auditions while Beth played close by, oblivious to the topic of conversation.
"But you haven't gone to a single audition in weeks!" insisted Quinn, when Santana shrugged her shoulders and grunted noncommittally in answer to Quinn's question about Santana's future career plans. "San, I know you put everything on hold to be there for me through all the Oliver bullshit but that's over now. Why don't you call your agent and remind him that you're looking for work?"
Santana snatched the bacon cheeseburger that she'd 'liberated' from work out of Quinn's hands and took a large bite, chewing thoughtfully before answering.
"I don't know, Q," she said finally, handing the burger back to her fiancée. "I did the commercial back in December, and then everything kind of got crazy for us - I kind of feel like I lost momentum, you know?"
"You can get that back," Quinn assured her. "Baby, you're too talented to give up on your dreams. Everything's settled down now and you can't put your life on hold forever. Besides, you need to set an example for Beth. Do you want her to aspire to be a waitress?" Both of them watched the little girl as she determinedly climbed the jungle gym, a frown of concentration fixed firmly across her face. Then Quinn turned her head to stare pointedly at the brunette.
"Okay, okay, I'll call him," Santana grumbled, pouting much like a four year old herself. In a fit of childishness, she stole Quinn's burger once more and polished it off in two huge bites that left Quinn scowling at her. "Yummy," she said with a giggle and Quinn slapped her indignantly.
"I take it back - I don't think you're ready for a career," she said sulkily. "I feel like I should be enrolling you in kindergarten in the fall along with Beth."
"I'll get you another burger," Santana offered, and Quinn was somewhat mollified.
"With extra bacon," she instructed sternly. "Seriously, San, I just want you to be happy. I remember the night you came home after filming the commercial and you just... glowed. I want to see you like that all the time." She reached for Santana's hand and squeezed it gently.
Santana smiled. "I am happy, Q," she insisted, tangling her free hand into the silky blonde strands of her hair and capturing her lips in a chaste kiss. "You and Beth make me happy. But I promise I'll call my agent later, okay?"
"Why not now?" Quinn countered, pressing Santana's purse into her lap.
Santana sighed. "You're not going to give me a moment's peace until I do it, are you?" she asked in resignation.
"Nope," grinned Quinn triumphantly.
By the time Santana's lunch break ended, she'd lined up three separate auditions over the coming week and Quinn was thrilled to see the light in her fiancée's eyes as she briefly told her the details. Two were for commercials but the third was for a TV show pilot. Santana's agent had promised to email over all the details that afternoon. As Quinn kissed her goodbye by the entrance to the diner, Beth holding tightly to both of their hands, she couldn't help the pride that shone on her face. Santana was playing it down but Quinn knew she was excited about the auditions.
"You're going to be amazing," Quinn promised her. "The casting people are going to love you, you'll see."
Santana huffed out a breath. "You don't think you might be a little bit biased?" she asked, her full lips pouting adorably.
"Not in the slightest," Quinn told her happily, shaking her head. "You're fantastic and they'd be crazy not to hire you, right Beth?"
"Uh huh." The little girl swung from their hands as she agreed automatically.
Santana grinned. "Maybe you're right," she said, uncharacteristically bashful.
"I know I'm right," Quinn assured her, drawing her in for one last kiss before Santana's boss started glaring at her from behind the counter and she reluctantly had to let her go.
Quinn's eyes followed her retreating fiancée all the way to the back of the diner before she turned her attention back to Beth who was tugging on her hand impatiently.
"C'mon, Quinn, let's go," she said insistently, bouncing on the soles of her small feet.
Quinn couldn't help but chuckle as she held open the door for the little girl, who skipped out onto the sidewalk, eager to be back outside in the late spring sunshine. Now that Quinn was finished with school for the summer, Beth was a lot happier. She was still reluctant to let Quinn leave her for any period of time, even when Santana was right there with her, and she was still experiencing frequent nightmares, but she was talking more and settling back into routine life in New York. The coming weekend would be the first break to that routine, however, and Quinn was a little worried about how Beth would cope with the disruption. She and Santana were taking the little girl to Lima to celebrate her fifth birthday with Judy and introduce her to Santana's parents.
That night, after Beth was asleep, Quinn voiced her worries to Santana. They were snuggled on the couch watching TV and Quinn's head lay contentedly against Santana's chest as the brunette stroked her hair idly.
"Do you think it's too soon?" she asked softly, wriggling against her fiancée to get more comfortable. "I know your parents are excited to meet her and my mom is desperate to throw her a birthday party but I'm not sure Beth's ready to meet a whole new branch of her family."
Santana considered Quinn's concerns before answering, chewing thoughtfully on her lower lip. "I think she'll be fine," she said finally, trailing silky strands of Quinn's hair through her fingers and smiling at the sensation. "She loves your mom and we'll be right there with her the whole time. And I'll tell my parents to tone it down and keep it low key when they meet her. I know she's been through a hell of a lot, but Beth's a tough kid… she's a lot like her mother," she mused.
Quinn sighed. "And that's the other thing," she said softly. "We still need to think about what to tell Beth about me. She's so smart and she's going to start asking questions one day. She's already started making comments. Do we wait for that day or do we broach the subject with her sooner? If we wait too long I'm scared that she'll feel like we've kept this huge secret from her, but if we tell her too soon, how is she going to understand it?"
"I don't know, baby," Santana admitted, planting a gentle kiss on Quinn's forehead. "I guess you'll know when the time's right?" She didn't sound convinced – her statement coming out more like a question. Quinn groaned audibly. "I'm sorry," Santana soothed instantly. "I wish I could be more help."
"I know," Quinn murmured, burying her head against Santana's chest. "There's no easy answer. God, parenting is hard."
Santana chuckled. "Yeah, but it's totally worth it, right?" she asked with a grin.
"Definitely," Quinn agreed, stifling a yawn.
Santana laughed again, pushing Quinn's shoulder to get her to move. "Come on, sleeping beauty, let's get you to bed," she said gently.
"But I'm not tired," protested Quinn grumpily. "And I'm comfortable."
"Sure, you're not tired," Santana said lightly, giving Quinn another, slightly harder push as she yawned for a second time. "Running around after an almost five year old all day doesn't sound exhausting at all."
Quinn grumbled under her breath as she detangled herself from the brunette and clambered to her feet, shivering slightly from the loss of Santana's body heat. She held out a hand to help her fiancée up, and as Santana stood up, she tugged her close and kissed her fiercely. Over the last couple of weeks, their opportunities for alone time had been severely restricted thanks to Quinn's finals, Santana's work schedule, and Beth's frequent nightmares, and Quinn suddenly felt a rush of desire flood through her at the sight of Santana's dishevelled hair and rumpled clothing – her shirt riding up to give an enticing glimpse of her tanned, toned stomach.
"Hmm, I've missed this," she murmured throatily as she planted hot, open-mouthed kisses along Santana's jawline before sucking hungrily on her pulse point and eliciting a surprised and delighted gasp from her fiancée. The sleepy, relaxed atmosphere changed in an instant to become highly charged and heated with anticipation. "I want you," Quinn panted against the shell of Santana's ear, even as the brunette began to lead her backwards in the direction of their bedroom.
In a giggling tangle of limbs and half discarded clothing, they tumbled onto the bed, rolling over as they both sought to be the one in control of the moment. Santana emerged victorious, straddling Quinn's thighs in the center of the mattress and sitting back to study her flushed and eager fiancée, as Quinn fought to pull her back into an embrace.
"Well, for a start, this needs to come off," purred Santana, tugging at the hem of Quinn's lacy camisole, raking her fingernails over Quinn's sensitized skin and causing her breath to hitch. Obediently, Quinn raised her arms over her head and allowed the brunette to remove the offending item of clothing. Her newly exposed skin barely had time to get used to the change in temperature before Santana's hands covered her breasts, squeezing gently as she ran her thumbs lightly over the peaks, causing Quinn to moan appreciatively.
Santana lowered her lips to replace her fingers on Quinn's right breast, and she trailed her newly freed up fingers tantalizingly down Quinn's abdomen, swirling around her navel, before pressing lightly against the flimsy cotton of her underwear at the apex of her thighs, her sleep shorts having already been shed on their way to bed.
"Mmm, you're so wet," Santana whispered reverently, slipping her fingertips under the damp cotton and causing Quinn to grip hold of the sheets as a rush of arousal pooled low in her belly.
"Quinn!" A shriek from Beth's bedroom caused the girls to leap apart guiltily, both of them breathing hard. Santana groaned as Quinn grabbed her robe and wrapped it around her almost naked body. The brunette offered her a regretful smile.
"Go check on her," she said with a pout but her dark eyes were full of concern for Beth.
"It won't be like this forever," Quinn promised, planting a quick kiss on the Santana's forehead before heading to check on the little girl.
She found Beth sitting up in bed, wailing, her hazel eyes wide in the semi-darkness as tears streamed down her cheeks.
"Quinn!" Beth cried when she saw her illuminated in the doorway, clambering out of bed and running to throw her arms around Quinn's middle. "I dreamed that you were gone away and I couldn't find you!"
Quinn dropped to her knees and gathered the trembling four year old into her arms. She was hot and damp with perspiration, her curls sticking to her cheeks as tears rolled down her face.
"I'm right here, baby," she whispered soothingly. "I promise you I'm not going anywhere – not without you. Ssh, Beth, it's okay." Beth continued to cry, her head buried against Quinn's shoulder, as Quinn rubbed her back in gentle, rhythmic circles. "It was just a bad dream, that's all. You're safe with us." Her heart broke for her daughter and it was hard to keep her own voice from breaking as she murmured soft, comforting words to the little girl.
After a few minutes, Beth's breathing evened out and her tears slowed to occasional sniffles.
"Are you ready to get back into bed?" Quinn asked quietly, her legs starting to go to sleep from her awkward position on the floor. Beth shook her head and whined slightly, wrapping her arms more tightly around Quinn's neck. "Sweetie, it's very late," Quinn continued, trying to reason with the four year old. "It's way past your bedtime. It's past my bedtime."
"I want to sleep in your bed," Beth grumbled petulantly. "With you and Tana."
Quinn groaned inwardly. She and Santana had been faced with this issue on several occasions now, and they both felt it was important to try to get Beth to stay in her own bed. It had been different in their old apartment where they'd lived in one room, but now Beth had her own room they didn't want to encourage her.
"No, baby," Quinn told her softly. "You need to sleep in your bed. I'll stay here with you until you fall asleep and then I'll be right next door, I promise. Santana needs to get some sleep tonight because she has her audition tomorrow and she can't do that with you wriggling around next to her like a wriggly worm."
Beth giggled despite herself. "I can be still," she said hopefully but Quinn shook her head.
"I don't think so, honey," she said with a chuckle.
"Yeah, it's bad enough with Quinn thrashing around next to me," Santana said from the doorway, causing them both to jump. "I've never known two people who move around in their sleep as much as you two." She dropped to her knees beside them and grinned. "How you doing, squirt?"
"Okay," Beth said sleepily, rubbing her cheek against Quinn's shoulder as she turned her head to look at Santana, offering her a small smile. "Tana, you got your 'dition for the 'mercial tomorrow?"
Quinn could tell Beth was getting tired again by the way she reverted to baby talk, and by the way the little girl suddenly felt heavier in her arms.
"I do," Santana told her, lifting Beth out of Quinn's arms and staggering to her feet under the little girl's weight. She placed her back into bed and smoothed the damp curls away from her forehead. "So I need my beauty sleep, or else you know what?" Beth shook her head, a small giggle escaping her lips as she caught on to the fact that Santana was playing with her. "Or else, I might turn into a big, scary monster who eats little girls' toes for breakfast!" Santana yelled, causing Beth to squeal with delight as she tickled her feet through the blankets.
"Good job, San, we're supposed to be trying to get her to go to sleep," Quinn said drily, shaking her head at the giggling pair. Santana's distraction tactics had done the trick though as Beth yawned and snuggled down under her blankets without any further fuss.
"Night, squirt," Santana murmured, leaning over to kiss her forehead.
"Night," Beth replied sleepily. "Night, Quinn."
"Good night, baby," Quinn whispered as Santana wrapped an arm around her waist and led her back to the doorway. "Remember, we'll be right next door if you need us." Beth nodded, her eyes shut tight as she reached for her battered cuddly rabbit and pulled it close to her chest.
Once safely back in their own room, Quinn collapsed onto the bed with a groan.
"I'm sorry, San," she said with a sigh. "I promise I'll make it up to you another night." Expelling great effort to sit up, she shrugged off her robe and reached for her discarded vest, tugging it over her head before climbing under the covers and holding them up for Santana to join her.
"It's okay," Santana assured her as Quinn settled into her arms, resting her head against the brunette's shoulder. "Like you said, it won't be like this forever. It's only been a couple of weeks. We need to give it time."
"I couldn't do this without you," Quinn mused, wriggling to get comfortable as she threw a leg over Santana's and moulded herself into her fiancée's side. "Thank you," she murmured sleepily.
"I love you," Santana replied simply. "Both of you." She wrapped an arm around Quinn's waist and tugged her even closer so that they lay flush against each other. "Now go to sleep and try to keep still for once. I meant what I said to Beth, sleeping next to you is like sleeping with a litter of snakes." Her tone was grouchy but she was tracing light circles on Quinn's exposed thigh as she spoke to let her know she was only teasing.
"Bite me," Quinn responded grumpily.
Santana chuckled. "That can be arranged," she muttered, just loud enough for Quinn to hear.
Over the next three days, Santana had auditions for two different commercials, but she failed to secure either job. By Thursday night she was irascible and sulky, and convinced that she was unemployable.
"That's the right attitude to go into your audition for the pilot tomorrow," Quinn told her drily, shaking her head at her fiancée as she plated up pancakes for dinner – something which seemed to be becoming a tradition for Santana every time she had an audition. Quinn was getting heartily sick of pancakes this week but neither Santana nor Beth seemed to have developed the same aversion and this was her third batch of the night.
"Well, if I can't even book a lousy commercial, what chance have I got of getting a part in a TV show?" retorted Santana grouchily.
Quinn ignored her and handed her the plate of pancakes. "That's your lot," she warned. "My kitchen is closed." They headed to the dining table where Santana shared half of her pancakes with Beth, who was bouncing excitedly in her seat. "So, if you're not done by seven," Quinn said, as though they were already in the middle of a conversation about it," you'll need to call me and I'll take Beth and our bags to the airport and you can meet us there."
Santana sighed. "I know, baby, you've been over this a million times. Relax."
"You're not even packed yet, San!" whined Quinn anxiously. Her own suitcase, containing both her and Beth's clothes was neatly packed and ready to go by the front door but Santana's, as per usual, lay open and messy in the middle of the living room.
"It'll get done," Santana assured her, helping Beth apply liberal amounts of syrup to her pancakes.
Quinn rolled her eyes. "That's enough." She took the syrup bottle away from them and passed Beth a bowl containing blueberries and sliced banana instead. "Try this," she suggested, shaking her head at her fiancée. "You know what? Fine. I'm not going to worry about it," she said with a sigh. "I trust you. Just make sure you're at the airport by…"
"Eight o'clock," interjected Beth, through a mouthful of pancakes and Santana laughed. After a moment, Quinn couldn't help but chuckle as well.
"I guess I have reminded you enough times," she said ruefully. "Okay, my lips are sealed from here on out."
"Don't worry," Santana told her appeasingly, reaching across the table to squeeze Quinn's hand gently. "It'll be fine."
"It'll be fine," parroted Beth, patting her on the arm with sticky fingers.
Quinn shook her head at the pair of them. "Shut up and eat your pancakes," she said with a giggle.
As it turned out, Santana did make it home by her seven o'clock deadline the next night but only just. As such, the girls didn't get chance to discuss Santana's audition until they were thirty thousand feet in the air, heading to Ohio and Beth was curled up in her window seat with all three of their pillows and blankets, having fallen asleep despite her excitement almost as soon as they'd reached cruising altitude.
"So, how did it go?" Quinn asked, grinning expectantly at the brunette, but Santana simply shrugged and sighed.
"No clue," she admitted ruefully. "They said they'd call within the next few days but I don't know if that's a brush off or a good sign. With the commercial auditions they always let you know on the day either way."
"Well do you feel good about it?" Quinn wanted to know, pressing Santana for more details but again her fiancée was dismissive.
"I don't know," she said noncommittally. Quinn recognized that she was trying to play it down and she could see how much Santana wanted the role. It was just like her to pretend that something that mattered to her wasn't important - she was trying to protect herself from the inevitable upset if things didn't turn out the way she wanted them to. A year or so ago, she might have pushed Santana into admitting her true feelings, but now she knew better. Santana knew that she wasn't fooling her - Quinn could see that in her fiancée's dark eyes, but she simply needed Quinn's support, nothing more, nothing less. So Quinn wrapped her arms around the brunette and snuggled as close to her as the restrictive plane seats would allow, knowing that she'd be there for Santana no matter what – whether it was to celebrate with her or commiserate.
It was late when they arrived in Ohio and Quinn carried her sleeping daughter through the airport as Santana manhandled their luggage. Judy was waiting for them in the arrivals hall and she insisted on taking Beth from Quinn as soon as she laid eyes on them.
"Give me my granddaughter," she instructed, and Quinn glared at her as she handed the slumbering child over.
"Mom!" she hissed, her eyes flashing warningly but Judy was unrepentant.
"Oh, Quinnie, she's asleep, she can't hear me, and you shouldn't be carrying her – think of your back!"
Judy led them to her car and buckled Beth into her newly purchased car seat quickly and efficiently before turning to hug her daughter.
"I've missed you," she said softly, before reaching out to squeeze Santana's hand affectionately. "All of you."
Quinn felt a sudden rush of love for her mother – Judy wasn't the same person she'd been five and a half years ago when she'd stood by and watched Quinn's father throw her out of the house like a worthless piece of trash. She was living proof that people could change and Quinn loved her all the more because of it.
"We missed you too, Mom," she murmured happily.
Beth's birthday party was scheduled for Sunday afternoon but, after a late start on Saturday, Quinn and Santana had arranged to introduce the little girl to Santana's parents. They'd be at the party on Sunday as well, but they were so desperate to meet Beth that Santana and Quinn had agreed a pre-party introduction visit.
Santana's mother in particular was enamoured with Beth from the moment she laid eyes on her.
"Oh, she's just beautiful," she gushed as Beth clung tightly to Quinn's hand and eyed the strangers warily. "And what a lovely dress!" She knew just the right thing to compliment Beth on, the little girl was extremely proud of her pink and white lacy dress that Quinn had let her pick out for the occasion. She beamed at Santana's mother. "And she has your smi-" Maribel started to say, but caught herself just in time. "You have a lovely smile," she corrected and Beth grinned at her.
"I have a loose tooth," she said shyly. "See?" She wiggled her tooth with her finger.
"Wow," Maribel acted impressed. "Well, I know that you're a big girl now, aren't you? How old are you going to be?"
Beth held up five fingers.
"Beth, use your words, honey," Quinn reminded her softly.
Maribel chuckled. "Oh, she's fine, mi hija. But I think I know how to get a little girl to talk – chocolate cake?"
Beth's eyes lit up and she jumped up and down with instant excitement.
"Yes, please," she rasped, as Quinn groaned inwardly, knowing that her daughter's pristine pink and white dress was not going to stay that way for long.
By the time Beth had eaten two large slices of Maribel's home-made chocolate cake, she was chattering away to her like they were old friends. Maribel showed the little girl photographs of Santana as a child and Beth was fascinated by the stories she told her about the trouble Santana had gotten into as a five year old. Maribel even located some of Santana's old toys and Beth was thrilled to play with them. By the time they finally headed back to Judy's house, Beth was exhausted, messy, but above all, happier than Quinn had seen her in a long time.
"Look at you," Judy said reprovingly as she took in Beth's chocolate smeared dress and face when the three of them piled into the Fabray house. "I think someone needs to jump straight in the bathtub."
"I thought we could just toss her in the pool out back," Santana joked, and Beth shrieked with mock terror, tearing up the stairs as fast as her short legs would carry her, Quinn following close behind to corral her daughter into the bathtub.
"Quinn?" Beth said thoughtfully as Quinn shampooed the little girl's hair as the splashed around in the tub. "Do you have any toys from when you were a little girl?"
"Um, I don't know," Quinn admitted, feeling a little sad at the question. "We only moved here when I was fourteen so my mom may have given our toys away before we moved. You'd have to ask her."
"Okay," Beth said agreeably. "Do you think your mommy has photos of you when you were little like Santana's mommy has?"
Quinn froze. She knew that Judy had album upon album of family snaps and professional photo-shoots, up until puberty hit and Quinn refused to be photographed any longer. She also knew that Beth wouldn't fail to see the similarities between them if she saw the pictures. Their eyes, ears, and mouths were identical, and Quinn's hair had been the exact same shade of blonde, if a little straighter than her daughter's. Their noses were different and Quinn's face had been a little rounder but there were more than enough similarities to outweigh the differences.
"Quinn?" Beth asked again when she didn't respond.
"Let's get this shampoo out of your hair and get you into your pajamas," Quinn said finally, with forced brightness. "You've got a busy day tomorrow. You're not going to have time to look at old pictures, you're going to be having far too much fun."
Beth was not deterred. "But I want to see your pictures," she pleaded. "Santana's mommy showed me hers. Why can't I see yours?"
Quinn sighed wearily. She did not want to have this conversation now, in her mom's house, the day before Beth's birthday party. She wanted to have time to think it through, research the situation, plan what she was going to say. But she also knew that Beth had inherited her stubbornness along with her physical attributes and the little girl wasn't going to give up on this.
"Of course you can see them," she said softly, "but I need to talk to you about something first. I need you to be a big girl and listen to me, okay?"
"Okay," agreed Beth easily, looking at Quinn expectantly but Quinn shook her head.
"Not here," she explained. "Wait until you're cleaned up and out of the tub, then I'll get you some chocolate milk and we can have a grown up talk."
Beth was agreeable to her terms and she said nothing more about Quinn's childhood as she allowed her to wash the soap out of her hair, before towelling her off and helping her into a pair of brand new Sofia the First pajamas as an early birthday present. Quinn settled Beth into her bed in the guest room and gave her a book to look at while she dashed downstairs under the guise of getting chocolate milk.
"What do I say to her?" she wailed in anguish to her mom and Santana. The brunette shrugged helplessly.
"Just tell her how much you love her and how much Shelby loved her," she suggested, holding Quinn tightly against her and trying in vain to stroke the tension out of her shoulder blades. "She's smart, she'll understand."
Judy nodded. "You need to tell her the truth, Quinn. Secrets and lies can destroy a family, you know that. She loves you. Even if she doesn't take it well, you need to remember that."
Neither of them had any real words of wisdom to offer. Quinn knew she was expecting too much of them, she had no answers herself. All she had was the truth. With a heavy heart, she trudged back up the stairs carrying Beth's milk and a photograph album containing images of herself at Beth's age.
"You brought photos!" cried Beth happily, crawling down the bed towards Quinn, excitement lighting up her small face.
"I did," Quinn confirmed, setting the chocolate milk down on the nightstand and sitting down on the edge of the bed. "But I want to talk to you about something first. Do you know what a family is, honey?"
Beth nodded, her blonde curls bouncing. "Uh huh, it's a mommy, a daddy, and a baby," she said quickly, looking pleased with herself for knowing the answer.
Quinn smiled at her. "Yes, sometimes that's true, but there are other types of families as well. You and your mommy were a family, and now I think you, Santana, and I are a family too."
Beth considered this for a moment. "So a family could be people who love each other?" she suggested.
Quinn beamed. "You are so smart, you know that? That's exactly what I think a family is!"
"I like having you as my family," Beth confirmed, snuggling closer to Quinn.
"Me too," agreed Quinn. "And you're always going to be my family, I promise. So, I have another question for you, and this one's a little harder." She swallowed hard before continuing. "Have you ever heard the word adoption?"
To her surprise, Beth nodded again. "Yes, because Rachel is... adoptioned?" She frowned as she tried to figure out how to say it right.
"Adopted," corrected Quinn, trying not to laugh. "That's right, she is. And Rachel had two families. She had her birth mom, and she had her adoptive parents."
Beth digested this information, a small frown playing on her features. "'Cos my mommy was Rachel's birth mommy," she said finally. "I remember because Mommy explained it to me."
"She did?" Quinn was equally surprised that Shelby had talked to Beth about it and that Beth had never mentioned it.
"Uh huh, mommy said that she growed Rachel in her tummy but that she gave Rachel to her daddies because they wanted a baby a whole lot." Beth was proud of herself for remembering all of this.
Quinn felt like her heart was beating so fast that it was going to burst out of her chest. She was reaching the point of no return now. "You're right," she told the little girl gently. "And that's why Rachel looks a lot like your mommy."
"Hmm," Beth hummed, reaching for her chocolate milk. She looked up at Quinn with an expression so innocent that it made her heart ache.
Quinn took a deep shaky breath and opened up her photograph album. On the first page there was a picture of Quinn taken at her fifth birthday party. Her long blonde hair was bunched into two glossy pigtails and she was wearing a pretty pink dress, not too dissimilar from the one Beth had worn that day. She was smiling for the camera and clutching a large doll her father had given her, her hazel eyes shining brightly. Beth studied the picture for a long time without saying anything.
"I like your dolly," she said after a long pause. Her tone had changed and her eyes were full of worry and confusion. Quinn knew the little girl was close to working it out. Beth touched the photograph gently, trailing her fingertips across the image - the eyes, the smile. She bit her bottom lip absently.
"Beth," Quinn said softly. Beth looked up, her eyes narrowing at the seriousness of Quinn's tone. "Sometimes, when a girl has a baby and she's not able to take care of her, she gives that baby to someone who will love her and provide for her and give her everything she needs to be happy. That's what your mommy did for Rachel. She loved her very much but she couldn't take care of her." She was trying to keep her voice steady but her tone started to tremble on the last sentence. "When I was in high school, I gave birth to a beautiful, perfect baby girl," she continued shakily, as Beth resumed tracing over the photograph with her index finger. "I loved her very much, but I was very young and I couldn't look after her. That baby was you, Beth."
"I growed in your tummy?" Beth asked quietly.
Quinn nodded. "You did. And I loved you, even before you were born. I wanted you to be happy. And your mommy, Shelby, she wanted you so badly - she wanted to take care of you and make you happy, the way Rachel's daddies had made her happy."
Beth was quiet again for a long time as she thought about everything Quinn had told her. Quinn watched as a myriad of emotions flickered across the little girl's face.
"Are you going to give me away again?" Beth whispered, her large hazel eyes filling with tears.
"No, baby, no!" Quinn was horrified by Beth's question. She scooped her into her arms and held her tightly, feeling her tremble against her. "Never," she promised, tears pouring down her face. "Beth, I love you more than anything in this world. I gave you to Shelby because she wanted to love you too, and because I was too young to take care of you. But I'm older now, and when your mommy was in the hospital she asked me to take care of you. She gave you back to me, and I fought for you, and I'm never letting you go again."
"Why are you crying?" Beth wanted to know, as she looked up at Quinn's tear stained cheeks.
"Because I love you so much," Quinn said honestly, "and because I never want to do anything to make you sad."
"I'm not sad," Beth promised her. "I want to stay with you - you're not going to give me away?" She sounded more reassured now but still a little apprehensive.
"Never," Quinn insisted.
"And I growed in your tummy?" repeated Beth. Quinn nodded as she wiped away the remnants of her tears. "How did I get in there?"
Quinn chuckled. "That's a story for another day, kiddo," she said, shaking her head. "Do you have any other questions?" Beth thought for a moment, then shook her head. "Well if you do, you can always ask me," Quinn told her, knowing that this was unlikely to be the end of their discussion of the subject. For now, the little girl was overwhelmed and probably a little confused - she needed time to come to terms with everything - but from the way she was still clinging to Quinn, it was clear that the revelation hadn't destroyed their relationship. Quinn felt shaky, exhausted, and relieved all at the same time, but more than anything she was happy. She had a beautiful daughter, a loving fiancée and a supportive mother. When she thought back to the same night five years earlier, she'd never felt more alone. She could barely believe how much her life had changed since that night.
"Do you want to go downstairs and see Santana?" she asked Beth gently, smiling at her daughter. The little girl shook her head.
"Not yet," she explained. "I wanna see more pictures first."
"Okay," Quinn agreed, drawing her feet up onto the bed and settling back against the headboard, pulling Beth into a tight embrace. She turned the page of the photo album and chuckled. The picture showed a young Quinn with chocolate all around her mouth and frosting in her hair.
Beth let out a peal of laughter. "You look just like me today!" she squealed happily and Quinn had to concur.
Beth's birthday party was scheduled for three o'clock the next afternoon and Judy had gone to town with lavish decorations more befitting a sweet sixteen, and enough food to cater for a small army. Unbeknownst to Quinn, although she suspected Santana had been involved in the subterfuge, Judy had invited several of their friends. Tina and Mercedes, home from UCLA for the summer showed up first, followed by Kurt, Blaine, and Rachel who'd taken the train from New York especially for the occasion. Santana's parents arrived, followed by Brittany who Beth simply adored from the moment she met her. Paul Karofsky was there, staying close to Judy and beaming at her as though he couldn't understand how he'd gotten so lucky. Quinn liked him a lot for that.
The biggest surprise was Puck, who arrived shortly after everyone else, wearing an airforce uniform.
"Wow, Puck," said Quinn in amazement, shaking her head in amazement as he embraced her. "Why didn't you tell me? Why didn't anyone tell me?"
Puck shrugged. "I don't know," he said. "I just got through basic training so I've been pretty much out of the loop for a while. It looks like you've had a lot on your plate too."
"Are you okay with it?" Quinn asked him anxiously, squeezing his hand gently.
Puck smiled. "You're her mom, Q, she belongs with you," he told her simply.
"So what prompted... this?" asked Quinn waving her hand to indicate his uniform. "I have to say, I never would've guessed it."
Puck looked a little embarrassed as he answered. "To tell the truth, after what happened to Finn, and then Shelby..." He broke off and exhaled loudly. "I was a mess, Q. I mean, I'd been a mess for a long time, but then I figured life's too short. I thought about her," he gestured towards Beth who was playing noisily with Brittany some distance down the garden, "and I didn't want her to come and find me when she's eighteen and realize I'm just as useless as my old man's always been for me. I wanted to make her proud."
Quinn's eyes filled with tears. "Well, this is a good first step," she told him, hugging him and sniffling. There was a moment of awkwardness when they parted - they'd both grown so much since their ill-fated last conversation that they were uncertain around one another. Then Puck looked over at the Fabrays' pool and sighed dramatically.
"Jeez, Q, who's your mom employed to clean her pool?" he asked with a low chuckle. "Look at the state of it!"
Quinn laughed. "Feel free to clean it while you're here, for old time's sake," she offered, and Puck returned her laugh.
"I might just do that," he told her with a grin, before heading off to say hello to their other friends.
"I wish we'd been able to invite some children Beth's age," Judy confided in Quinn, when she sought her mom out to thank her for the party.
Quinn laughed. "I think Brittany more than compensates," she said, watching her daughter chase the blonde around and around the garden with seemingly boundless energy.
"Yes," Judy mused. "Are you absolutely sure that girl is a genius, Quinn?"
Quinn was laughing too hard to answer as she watched Brittany allow Beth to catch her and they tumbled into a tangled heap on the ground.
Judy winced. "She's going to get grass stains on her beautiful dress," she murmured anxiously.
"Hmm, I hope she does," Quinn replied with a chuckle, enamoured with watching the little girl enjoy herself.
When it was time to blow out her birthday candles, Beth, who'd loved being the center of attention all afternoon suddenly became shy and plastered herself to Quinn, burying her head against her shoulder as the amassed crowd sang happy birthday to her.
"Look at your cake, sweetie," Quinn urged, as Blaine and Kurt, conscripted by Judy, carried the most elaborate construction she'd ever seen gingerly to the long table that had been set up in the garden. The cake was a pink princess castle complete with turrets and sparkling pink icing. Beth's eyes widened and her mouth dropped open before she clapped her hands with undisguised glee.
Santana was snapping pictures on her phone when it started to ring, blaring out garishly. She blushed and turned it quickly to silent as Quinn shot her a questioning glance.
"I'll get it later," she mouthed, across the crowd of people.
Once the candles had been blown out and Beth had cried after realizing the cake was going to be cut up, Quinn noticed Santana sneak away from the group. She followed her stealthily and caught up with her in the den. Santana was just hanging up the phone, a stunned expression clouding her features.
"Who was it?" Quinn asked expectantly, knowing Santana was waiting for her agent to call about the TV pilot. "Was it...?"
Santana nodded, a brilliant smile creeping over her lips. "I got it, Q," she said in a hushed tone, her hands trembling as she stuffed her phone back into her pocket. Suddenly, Quinn was in her arms and the brunette was swinging her around, kissing her excitedly. "I got the job!"