A/N We did it … well actually you, my loyal (and patient) readers, did it. Over thousand reviews. That's just crazy.
This chapter is dedicated to rugby35 and CentauRita (loved all your reviews by the way, sugar) who have been battling for review number 1000. But of course, I thank the rest of you as well from the bottom of my heart.
I wasn't really surprised that (almost) every one of you is convinced that Alice is the evil, scheming bitch of the century. For now I'm not going to verify or contradict any of your theories, but I will shed some light on Edward's involvement … if there is any …
Enjoy!
Previously …
"Oh." Emmett exclaimed, clearly having some sort of epiphany. "I remember. Alice said that you and her … that you have never been mates … Oh dear Lord, that would explain a lot, wouldn't it?" He turned to look at Rosalie. "Do you think that she knew about them all along?"
Chapter 27 Mysteries unsolved
Jasper POV
The room fell into complete silence. Even a mere human would have been able to hear a pin drop under these circumstances.
I wasn't the only one who was stunned speechless by Emmett's unsuspected moment of clarity. Who would have thought he had it in him?
But the more important question was: Was Emmett right with his assessment? Was it possible that Alice has known all along about me and Bella, about us being mates? Or has she come to the same conclusion only after our separation, like me, finally realizing that we weren't supposed to last? I really hoped that was the case, because despite the new image I had of my ex-wife, I couldn't bring myself to believe that she was that cruel and callous. I still believed that she'd helped keeping me and Bella apart solely for the purpose to ensure the human's safety, because she'd cared about her best friend …
True, Alice was manipulative like no other, I've always known that, and I've never faulted her for that. That's who she was. But I've never pictured her to be ruthless to achieve her goals. Sneaky yes, but not ruthless …
But what if I was wrong? Maybe Alice has managed to deceive us all. What a disturbing thought.
It was a possibility, a small one, but still a viable possibility. As powerful as we all were, none of our gifts were infallible, not Edward's telepathy, Alice's fortune-telling or my empathy. And maybe we've been relying on them too much, to see what was right in front of our eyes …
It took some time and a lot of practice, but by now I knew exactly how to bypass Edward's mind reading power. And I wasn't the only one who'd managed to find a way to keep things from Edward, if necessary. It usually helped to think of things that annoyed or bored him, like thinking about fashion in Alice's case, or about rebuilding a car like Rosalie.
Naturally, we all had things to hide from each other, and living amongst a mind reader made us quite creative in trying to keep those things a secret.
Emmett's way to keep Edward out of his head was probably the most effective and quickest … and probably the cruelest … from Edward's point of view. I knew for a fact that Em actually took great pleasure bombarding Edward's 'innocent' mind with endless pictures of him with his mate, doing the nasty. Like hearing them on a daily basis wasn't enough to torture him … or any of us. Needless to say, those mental images usually had Edward running for the hills in no time.
As funny as it was, it was also a little childish to use such methods. It wasn't like Edward was spying on us on purpose. He just couldn't help. His gift like mine didn't have an on/off switch. As a matter of fact he, like me, wished that things were different. We both thought, that our gifts were more a burden than a blessing.
I wasn't sure if it was actually possible to find a way around my gift, since it was much harder to fake emotions than to hide thoughts, but who knew. In our world anything seemed possible … especially since Bella has become a part of it.
I had no problem to identify emotions, but to interpret them correctly was another story. And whenever I was in a room with more than two people it could be very difficult to pinpoint the source, to tell who was feeling what. It wasn't like emotions had a tenor to them, like thoughts.
Alice's gift worked in a complete different way.
For one, she didn't have visions to guide her or us twenty four seven, which was probably a very good thing. Otherwise she would have gone crazy a long time ago. But more importantly, the outcome of her visions could always change, because the future wasn't set in stone … which made her visions not very reliable to begin with. I was pretty sure that nobody knew how exactly Alice's gift worked, not even Alice herself.
Predicting the future was tricky business … nothing was for certain, too many variables to consider, everything could change in a blink of an eye. In another word: her gift was flawed.
Usually her visions came out of nowhere, triggered by one thing or another. My guess was those visions were the ones that truly mattered … like those times when she'd seen me slip up, and she actually had been able to stop me.
But most of the times she deliberately used her gift to search the future for anything and everything, trivial or otherwise. I could understand and appreciate her need to protect the family, and all those innocent humans (mostly from me), but using her gift to check the weather report for the next day or sneak a peek at her Christmas presents … well that was just wrong and not to mention extremely annoying.
Maybe her gift shouldn't be used like that? Maybe her gift did have some sort of limit? Maybe by trying to force to see everything, the truly important things had slipped by her notice? Why else hasn't she been able to warn us beforehand not to take Bella with us to that disastrous baseball game? Or why hasn't she seen that Bella was going to trick me, and leave to meet James all on her own? But the most important question was: Why in the hell hasn't she seen what was going to happen at Bella's birthday party? She could have saved us all a lot of heartache. But maybe she wasn't supposed to see it? Maybe it was supposed to happen just like that? Otherwise Bella and I wouldn't be here, together at last, now would we? Maybe she was no longer able to meddle in the fates of others? So should I just be grateful instead of angry?
Too many questions, not enough answers …
I was pulled out of my inner musings by the only person who could reach me at the moment without saying a word, the one person, who probably held my attention on a subconscious level at all time, just by being with me in the same room.
My beautiful mate.
So far she hadn't said anything, but I could tell that she wanted to, badly.
Bella slightly shifted her position in my lap, so that she was facing me again. She was confused and upset, that much was clear from her facial expression, but other than that I couldn't quite determine her emotional state. Once again her emotions were in total disarray.
Well, darlin' we are in the same boot here … I'm just as confused as you are …
"Jasper, you don't think that it's true, do you?" She asked me, her voice slightly breaking at the end. She shot me an inquiring, almost pleading look, her eyes wide, glistening with unshed tears.
I reached out, cupping her face, stroking her cheeks gently with my thumps. I yearned to console her, but I didn't want to lie either. "I don't know, Bella. I hope not, but …"
"… unfortunately we can't completely rule it out either." Rose finished my sentence in a subdued voice, echoing my thoughts precisely.
It was easy to tell that my sister felt regret for voicing her opinion out loud, which was certainly a first. I sent her some reassuring vibes, receiving a slight nod of acknowledgment and appreciation in return.
True Alice and Rose have never been very close, but they were family, sisters who trusted each other. So of course, if Alice truly had done something to harm her family, in any way, Rose would never forgive her for that. Any kind of betrayal was an absolute no-go in Rose's book, and considering her history, it was completely reasonable.
Bella shook her head vehemently. "No, no, I don't believe it. That would just be …"
"Cruel? Yeah it would be." I agreed. "I don't want to believe it either." But there are certain points I cannot ignore. I added in my mind.
"What's so hard to believe? She is a scheming, manipulating bitch, end of story." Peter seethed. Charlotte's and Rose's emotions told me, that they were in complete agreement with him, well at least with his last statement. Emmett seemed to be too stunned to make up his mind.
Peter did have a point. We all knew how Alice used her gift to manipulate things and people to her liking, we just hadn't called her out on it, not really anyway. We have taken her good intentions for granted, never having any reason to doubt her. Has she taken advantage of our faith we've put in her?
Before I could say my piece, Bella pushed me away … for the first time ever. She frantically scrambled to get on her feet. Although her rejection did hurt me, a lot, I helped her up. Her earlier confusion has quickly turned into a mixture of anger and disgust. It was hard to tell who exactly it was directed at, but from the look on her face, unfortunately it included me.
Oh great … how do I fix this?
I didn't get the chance to say or do anything, because she turned away from me, glaring at Peter, who was still sitting between Charlotte's legs.
"Oh, please … you are only saying this because you hate Alice." My mate scoffed, moving further away from me. She stopped a few feet away from Peter.
Only Bella would walk up to a vampire and start a confrontation, without considering the consequences. I admired her for her strength, her zest, but on the other hand I wanted to pull her aside and tell her to put a stop to this nonsense.
But I didn't. Instead I followed Bella like her shadow, barely keeping any space between us. I was practically breathing down her neck. She knew I right behind her, but sending clear vibes, telling me not to interfere. It was hard to fight the urge put my arms around her waist and pull her back to my chest. It went against my nature. For one I wanted to console her, but more importantly I wanted to protect her.
I knew from personal experience that Peter wasn't one for turning down a fight, verbal or otherwise. I sent him a wave of gratitude for trying to keep himself in check.
"You don't know anything." Bella snapped.
"Au contraire, mademoiselle, I happen to know quite a lot. Gifted vampire with over a hundred and fifty years of experience, remember?" Peter quipped.
Sometimes my brother was so full of himself. It would take more than a slap or two, to pull him down from his high horse. I was more than willing to deliver the message, but for now, I let it slide.
"And just for the record, I have every right to hate the little pixie. I've witnessed her turning my brother, my sire, the man I still look up to despite everything, into nothing more than a puppet on strings. Of course I hate her. Nothing you say will ever change my mind.
"She uses her gift to scheme and manipulate each and every person around her. Too bad for her, that neither I nor Char are that easily to control. Sorry guys," he spared us Cullens (and former Cullens) a significant look, "but how come that none of you have actually questioned her motives before? Are you actually that foolish?"
It was a low blow and he knew it. He hit a nerve, in all of us, I could tell. He wasn't wrong with his assessment though, harsh as it was, it was the truth. Blind faith was never a good thing.
Peter didn't feel bad for his admission. Actually he was relieved, for finally being able to speak his mind so freely. I've always known that he didn't like Alice or the person that I've become by choosing a life with her and the Cullens over him and Char.
Of course his feelings of resentment had nothing to do with my choice of diet. He couldn't care less about that. In fact, whatever made me happy was good enough for him. And changing my diet definitely fell in that category. But marrying Alice did not.
Until today he'd kept his true opinion to himself, clearly not wanting to cause irreparable damage to our friendship, because he'd known that at the time I would have chosen my supposed mate over him. I couldn't fault him for keeping his opinion to himself. It only showed how much he was willing to sacrifice to keep me in his life, one way or another.
Bella's breath hitched. She turned her head to look at me first, and then her eyes went over to Rosalie and Emmett. She shook her head. Whatever she saw in our eyes, it wasn't what she'd expected to find.
"I can't believe you are willing to condemn your sister without having any real evidence." She said quietly, but her voice spoke volumes. She was disappointed.
This was typical Bella behavior. Even though it has been very clear earlier that she was very mad at Alice about the whole divorce papers issue, she was still willing to give her the benefit of the doubt.
Sure, it was unfair to judge Alice without having her here to explain things and if necessary to defend herself. But still, in the end the fact remained the same … Alice was a manipulative bitch.
I was torn. I wanted to explain myself, telling Bella that I wasn't convinced … yet … that Alice had done anything, other than doing what she' thought was best for the family. But at the same time I wanted to knock some sense into my mate's head. Her compassion and selflessness were endearing and honorable character traits, a main part why I loved her so much, but somehow I hoped that with everything that has happened, she might have realized that she should be a little more careful who to trust. And here I'd thought vampires had a problem with change, apparently Bella did too. I swallowed my aggravation, focusing on calming my mate instead. Her wellbeing would always be my first and main concern. There would be time to deal with everything else later.
"Bella …" I called her name softly. With gentle, yet strong fingers I grasped her chin forcing her to look straight at me. When our eyes met, the tears, she has been trying to hold back, started spilling. I tried to pull her closer, but she fought against me. Glad to have another alternative, I tried to calm her with my gift instead, but again, it wasn't working.
Damn her and her stupid shield, I cursed inwardly.
Apparently she'd felt what I was trying to do. "Not right now, Jasper. I just … I think I need a moment to myself. Please, just let me go." She demanded gently yet firmly. I had no other choice but to let her go. I would never force myself on her, in any way.
Whatever makes you happy, Darlin' … I thought, taking a step back.
Bella wiped her tears from her face with the back of her hands and immediately turned to walk away from me.
"Where are you going?" I asked, completely aware how desperate I sounded. But I didn't care. Every vampire in the room knew what I was feeling, not only because I was projecting my gift. Mated vampires felt very possessive and protective of their mates, and not being able to console your mate … well, let's just say it was excruciatingly devastating.
Bella looked over her shoulder. She gave me a warm, reassuring smile, trying to tell me without words, not to worry.
"I need to use the bathroom. I had too much coffee and now I have to pee." Her answer was surprisingly blunt. And it wasn't an excuse. "Cause and effect." She added with a shrug, before she walked straight into the downstairs bathroom by the stairs, closing the door quietly behind her, disappearing from sight.
A few seconds later I heard water running down the drain. I had to smile despite my hurt feelings. Bella always turned on the sink before using the toilet, hoping that the sound of running water would drown out the other noises. It was a neat trick, but unfortunately for her, it didn't work, at least not completely. Of course for her sake, and ours, we've all learned to tune out certain noises.
I sank to the floor, feeling utterly drained all of a sudden.
The whole afternoon has turned into a freaking rollercoaster ride, one I couldn't say I was enjoying, at least not anymore.
Sure, the afternoon has started out just fine … well more than fine actually. To be honest, I've had the best make-out session of my life, and that was saying something, considering my age and my sexual experience, not to mention the fact that I haven't had the chance to find my own release. It still has been perfect. But then again, seeing Bella in all her naked glory for the first time was gratification enough. She was a vision, breathtakingly beautiful from head to toe. And making her cum with my tongue and my fingers … oh god, I couldn't wait to have a repeat performance of that, preferably sooner than later.
Of course, I was glad to have Emmett and Rose back in my life. And I knew they felt the same about me … and Bella. And of course, I'd anticipated that our reunion wouldn't be a walk in the park, that it could be tricky, but not like this … a freaking trip down memory lane, wondering if the life I've lived for the past seventy years might just have been a complete lie … Peter rubbing it in … Bella making me feel guilty and then shying away from me … it was all too much.
Of course, I broke down. But Peter, being Peter, didn't let me drown in self-pity.
"Did Bella just quote Matrix?" He remarked with a chuckle.
"Yeah … I think she did." Emmett verified, chuckling as well. "I didn't even know she was into this stuff." He mused. But he was clearly pleased by that fact.
"Of course, who wouldn't … Keanu alone …" Rose sighed.
"For a human he's quite hot." Char agreed in a similar dreamy voice, causing the women to giggle like teenage schoolgirls and the men to growl in annoyance.
But the effect of changing the subject remained just the same. Like magic the rising tension left the room, replacing my anxiety with far more pleasant feelings. I soaked up the amusement like a sponge. I was glad for being able to breathe freely again, even though it wasn't physically necessary, it made quite a difference.
My eyes were still glued to the bathroom door. I could still hear the water running, though I knew that Bella had already finished taking care of her human needs. I still couldn't get a good read on her emotions, but I took comfort in the fact that I couldn't hear her crying. From what I was able to gather, considering she had shut me out, quite literally on both accounts, she was having one hell of an inner monolog while she was in there.
Sometimes I wished I did have Edward's power. But then again, she was immune to that, too.
Char stood up and came over, placing a hand on my shoulder. "Bella is fine. Just give her a moment to calm down. This is all a little too much for her right now, as you can imagine." She leaned down and kissed my cheek swiftly, before she went into the kitchen. She was back a second later with a bottle of water for Bella. The way she was taking care of my mate, emotionally and physically, was heartwarming.
"I'm so sorry." Emmett muttered barely audible. I might have missed it completely, if it hadn't been for his emotions. His guilt was back at full force. He was desperate to make things right with me and his little sister, not worsen them. "Maybe I shouldn't have said anything."
"Stop berating yourself, honey. No one is mad with you." Rose soothed her mate, not only with words but with a gentle pat on his thigh as well. I let Emmett know through my gift that I totally agreed with his wife. His tense stance visibly relaxed. "But you've raised a valid question. It could be possible in theory … but I don't believe Alice is actually that good. Fooling Edward and Jasper … well I think that would be quite hard to pull off … and doing so on a long term basis …sheer impossible." She stated with full conviction.
"Yeah, the sneaky pixie isn't all that clever." Emmett agreed eagerly.
"Well, good thing is, her plan, whatever it was, has failed." Rose said, thoughtfully. "Though I still don't understand why it was okay to push Edward towards Bella considering her blood sings to him, and at the same time doing everything to keep you and her apart. It doesn't make any sense." She looked at me, seeking answers I didn't have, but would make sure to get … somehow, someday.
"Other than trying to prevent Bella from stealing her husband, you mean." Emmett joked, waggling his eyebrows suggestively.
With a loud thud Rose's hand connected with the back of Emmett's head. He didn't dare to complain, because he knew he'd deserved it.
"Ex-husband." I corrected him. Though I surely didn't like what he'd said, because he made it sound like Bella and I had started something back then, I wasn't really mad with though, knowing that he hadn't meant it like that. That's just Emmett, always speaking before thinking.
"You're divorced?" Rose asked, surprised, but utterly pleased at the same time. "Well, I guess that's the best thing I've heard today."
"I second that." Peter agreed, the glee in his voice matching that of my sister, but he wasn't surprised at all. Quite obviously Charlotte has filled him in after they'd left the house earlier to give me and Bella some privacy.
Although I was still hurt about the way Alice had dropped my ass, I couldn't argue that in the end, she's given me exactly what I wanted, and needed. Freedom. "She has filed for divorce in October. But I've only gotten the paper today." I told them.
"What a bitch." Rose cussed under her breath, her long blond hair swinging with the shakes of her head. "No wonder she was so pissed off whenever I mentioned your name. But what I don't get is why she hasn't told any of us. We are still her family." Her voice was layered with sadness and disappointment. With a thoughtful look on her face, she added, "I'm not even sure Edward knows. I wonder what else she's kept from us …"
Right then I heard the sink being turned off. "I guess Alice had her reasons … and we could sit here all day long and venture guesses. But I don't believe we would make any progress. So for everybody's sake, I think we should drop the whole 'Alice' subject … at least for now." I suggested. Everyone in the room was in complete agreement with my proposal.
I exhaled loudly and got on my feet. "In fact, there were far more pressing matters we need to discuss." I declared with a fleeting look over my shoulder. Of course, Peter and Char knew what I was referring to, but Emmett and Rose had no idea. Both their eyes widened marginally, telling me that my statement quite obviously caught their instant attention. But they had to be little more patient for the explanation, because a moment later the bathroom door opened and my mate came out.
Bella looked a thousand times better, emotionally speaking, because she always was beautiful, no matter what state she was in or what she was wearing. Though, I had to admit, seeing her dressed in that skirt, was truly a special treat.
Her eyes immediately sought out mine and a wide smile spread across her face when our eyes met. I was relieved to see in her warm, loving, ever-trusting eyes that she wasn't mad with me anymore. But more than that I could feel it because she'd dropped her shield again, allowing me complete access.
Waves of calmness and peace washed over me, intermingled with the unconditional love she felt for me. Her emotions were almost too overwhelming in their intensity and purity. Maybe I should be used to it by now, but the truth was I wasn't, probably I never would be.
I still felt undeserving of this kind, loving woman who was currently gazing at me like I was the most beautiful man and the most important person in her life. I still couldn't belief my luck. It was more I've ever dared to hope for. Regardless, I vowed to myself once again, that I would do everything in my power to keep her, to prove myself worthy of her trust and her love, to make her as happy as she made me.
I didn't know how long we stood there, lost in each other's gazes. The world around us seemed to disappear entirely. For me there was only Bella, and quite obviously she felt the same. What felt like hours, were probably just seconds. Finally I couldn't take it any longer, the physical distance between me and my mate. I needed to hold her, to feel her. With a few quick strides I was right in front of her, pulling her into my arms. I crashed my mouth on hers, kissing her passionately, almost desperately. She reciprocated in kind, moaning, when my tongue entered her mouth. God, she tasted so good. I would never get my fill of her.
I would have proceeded if it hadn't been for Bella's need for oxygen. Reluctantly, I pulled away, breathing almost as hard as my mate. I leaned in once more, placing a quick, soft kiss on her lips.
"I love you, too." I murmured against her lips, answering her unspoken words.
Bella sighed, burying her head into my chest. I could hear her mumbling silly words of apology. I shook my head, gently caressing her backside. "You have no need to feel sorry. If anything, I should be the one to apologize. Your reaction was completely justified. You are right. Judging someone without having any viable evidence is unfair, and not to mention rather pointless. I know we need to talk about this, but I think right now might not be the best time. Later, okay?"
She lifted her head, smiling. "That's fine with me."
We shared another sweet kiss, before I turned us around, to face our present company. Neither Bella nor I were prepared for what we found.
Both couples looked mildly disheveled. Emmett's shirt was missing a few buttons. Rose's hair looked like Bella's when she woke up in the morning. Peter and Charlotte both sat side by side on the floor, leaning against the wall. Their clothes were more wrinkled than before, but neither one of them seemed to care.
It wasn't hard to guess what has taken place behind our backs.
"Did we miss anything?" I asked, playing all innocent, but failing miserably.
"Like, you have to ask." Peter replied dryly, pulling his mate closer. Char rested her head on Peter's shoulder. She wore a huge smile on her face, looking utterly pleased. "Those vibes you just put out would make even the most virtuous person lose their inhibition in a jiffy. I mean that kiss alone …" he trailed of, with a dreamy look on his face. I rolled my eyes at him. I wouldn't be surprised if Peter asked for another demonstration, at another time.
Think again, you kinky bastard …
Emmett voiced his aggravation at loud. "Hey, that's my little sister, you are talking about." He growled at Peter. Bella didn't rebuke him this time, for calling her his little sister. She seemed to be otherwise occupied. Or she didn't care. It was hard to tell.
"That's enough boys. We don't want to make Bella any more uncomfortable than she already is." Rose cautioned.
I looked down at my mate, and for sure, she was blushing slightly. "No need to feel ashamed, Darlin'." I whispered into her ear, fighting the urge to pull her lob between my teeth and nibble on it.
Later … when we are alone … without witnesses …
"Jasper is right. You really shouldn't. That was a really, really nice kiss." Rose said, winking at Bella. To my surprise, she took my sister's appraisal for what it was, a compliment. I chuckled, when I felt my mate's embarrassment for nearly inciting an orgy vanish only to be replaced by feelings of another kind. Pride. This was new, but a refreshing change.
"So, Jasper," Rose called my attention, "you've mentioned something about important things we need to discuss. How about you fill us in now?"
I nodded once and guided Bella to the now empty chair. I sat down, pulling her into my lap. I liked having her there.
"Yes, well … since my return to Forks two days ago there have been … some complications." I began. "Carlisle's presumptions have turned out to be wrong. There are still werewolves in this area."
Rose and Emmett gasped, not in horror, but in surprise. "The wolves are back? Wow … that is … that could be a problem." My sister said, glancing over to Peter and Charlotte.
"You don't say. Char and I are practically housebound because of those nasty smelling mutts." Peter complained.
Rose wisely chose to ignore his pathetic whining. "How do you know they are back? Did they come over here?"
I shook my head. "No, Bella had a little run in with a guy named Sam Uley." I said, trying hard to keep my temper in check. Just thinking about her encounter with the werewolf made the venom pool in my mouth. I swallowed it, and my anger.
"Uley … that name sounds familiar. If memory serves his … grandfather, I presume … was part of the original pack. But what do you mean by run in? He didn't hurt you, did he?" Rose asked, addressing Bella directly.
"No, of course not." Bella exclaimed, clearly appalled by the implication. I wasn't surprised that she was angry because that the same reaction she'd had when I'd asked that question. I stroked her back reassuringly, sending her some calming waves. She took a deep breath before she went on. "Sam came to my house the other day, just to talk. He knows that vampires are back in the area, but he doesn't know who or how many. He came to warn me, that's it. And since you guys can smell each other … well let's just say he knew that I knew without saying it out loud. Sure, he wasn't thrilled about my involvement with you guys, far from it actually. But he didn't threaten me or anything. I think … somehow … he seemed to understand."
Rose and Emmett were shocked. "Let's hope so … But how do you know that he is a werewolf?" She demanded to know rather nicely, despite her level of stress. She was truly concerned about Bella.
"Oh, he didn't tell me … but from the bits and pieces of information I've gotten from my friend Jacob and you guys … well it was rather easy to put two and two together." Bella explained, feeling very proud of herself. We all knew that she was very smart, and sometimes annoyingly observant.
"So he knows that you know, about what he is, I mean." Rose clarified. Bella nodded once. "Hmmm … that's interesting. As far as I know they are just as secretive about their existence as we are, maybe even more so. He must like you, or at least respect you, to let you get away with it." She said, frowning slightly. "Albeit, you have no idea, how lucky you are, Bella. Werewolves can be very dangerous. They usually act on instinct alone." She was simply stating facts, not trying to scold Bella. But of course, given her history, my mate didn't see it that way.
"Says the vampire." She scoffed. "I trust him with my life. I know they don't mean me any harm. They are here to protect the people of Forks. And last I've checked, I am one of the human citizens." She did have a point. Every vampire in the room could vouch for that. Her heartbeat was strong, and a little faster than usual, due to her anger.
For a moment there I wondered why she didn't tell my siblings about Sam's heroic act. As much as I hated to admit it, I sort of owed him, for saving Bella's life that night. But I guessed that she wasn't quite ready to share that information with them. Remembering the pain she'd felt when telling me about Edward's dumping act, I could understand her decision. I was sure, that she would tell them, eventually, when she was ready.
Rose shook her head. "No, actually, Bella, first and foremost they are here to protect their tribe. According to our treaty, Forks is our territory. They have to stay on their land … at least now that we are back." She amended, settling deeper into the couch. "But I guess you are right … in theory. Of course, they keep watch over the rest of the population of Forks too. I'm just not so sure they truly consider you part of the people they need to guard anymore. Don't get me wrong, I don't think they would do anything to you on purpose. And I hope they would help you, if you'd ask them for it. But since you are sleeping with the enemy, so to speak, well I wouldn't be surprised if they didn't. I'm sorry, but it is what it is." Bella nodded her head, but didn't reply anything. She seemed to realize that her association with us came with a price. Choosing sides always did.
"Bella, I'm just worried, that's it. You don't know these creatures like I do. Believe me. It wasn't easy to make them agree to the treaty in the first place. In fact, if it hadn't been for Edward's mind reading and Carlisle's way with words, things would have turned out quite differently." Rose said. "Maybe it's a natural response in our kind, and theirs, who knows, but it took a lot of convincing from Carlisle, that our first encounter hadn't ended in bloodshed."
Emmett snorted. "Five against three, I still think we could have taken them." He grumbled, frustration seeping out of him for being denied a challenge, and an unusual one at that. I grinned. My brother has always been the act-first-asked-questions-later-type, completely relying on his physical strength, always eager to show his supremacy in that department.
He was a stubborn hothead, even back in his human days. Who in their right mind would go up against a full-grown bear and believe to come out victorious? Only Emmett.
"Yes, honey, I know. You've lost the opportunity of a lifetime." Rose rolled her eyes, patting his leg. We all knew she was placating him. "But I am glad for the way things have turned out. The treaty has its perks. We can stay and return to this place whenever we want, without having to fear any retaliation.
"Actually … I have an idea. Remember, two years ago, when we came back, Carlisle had arranged a meeting with the tribal elders to talk and renew the treaty, since you and Alice had joined our coven? Well, maybe we should do the same thing now, explain our … er, temporary return but more importantly let them know that two human drinkers are staying as well. It would certainly show … I don't know … our good will to coexist in peace?"
I smirked. "I like the way you're thinking, sis." I said. Carlisle would be very proud of his daughter. "Bella, do you think, you could get in touch with Sam?"
Bella felt happy to be involved in this matter. "I don't have his number. But I could give Jacob a call. Maybe he will relay the message." She suggested, shrugging her shoulders. I could tell that she wasn't completely sure it would work, but she was willing to give it a try, eager to help in any way possible. I wouldn't to stop her, as long as she was staying out of trouble. Knowing her, it would be hard to convince her to stay away from the actual meeting, but there's always hoping.
"Okay that's settled then." Rose said, closing that particular subject, but moving on to next without further delay. "Jasper, you've said complications, as in plurals… what else is there?"
I grimaced. "Laurent."
"Laurent? What the hell is he doing here?" Emmett growled, nearly jumping off the couch, but his mate kept him in place.
I could understand his reaction. Werewolves were one thing. We could avoid them, if need be. And with our numbers, and fighting expertise on our side, I was fairly sure we would have the upper hand, if it actually came to a fight. But that would be the last resort. We would rather leave than start war with these creatures, which were in fact still part human.
But having to deal with another one of our kind, who might pose a threat to Bella, well that was another thing all together. Laurent was, or has been, connected to James, the vampire who had caused our family nothing but grief and in Bella's case enormous physical pain. Sure, he was dead now, thanks to me and Emmett, but still … the mere mention of his former coven member brought back all those horrible memories, we were all trying to forget, or at least bury. None of us wanted a repeat of that, especially not me.
Instinctively, I pulled Bella closer to me. She seemed to sense my distress, and snuggled deeper into my embrace. The contact helped to keep me focused. "We don't know. He didn't stick around so we couldn't ask him. I was hoping you might know something."
Rose and Emmett shared a brief look, before Rose answered my question. "Well, we didn't spend much time with the Denali clan. I went hunting with Kate a couple of times, but that's about it. When we left he was still there." She said, taking a moment to think. "But … now that you mention it … the color of his eyes was still too close to red than golden. But then again you know, as well as I do, it takes some time to get used to our diet." She spared me a significant look. She wasn't judging me, she never has.
It had taken me over a year, six months longer than Alice, to come to terms with the change. My eye color still differed slightly from the rest of them. They were a tad darker, but that was only noticeable to a vampire though. Unfortunately, there had been minor setbacks over the years. But I wanted this life, which was why I'd fought so hard to get back on course, each and every time. I knew I would never be completely impervious to the call of human blood, but by now I had enough strength to withstand its lure, to be around humans. As long as I didn't smell freshly spilled blood, I was safe. I still didn't know how Carlisle was doing it, treating humans with open wounds on a daily basis. Maybe the fact that he'd never tasted human blood was working into his favor.
"But there is something else." Rose went on. Her tone of voice changed. She sounded rather … smug. "I'm pretty sure he is loyal to the Denali's, because he is mated to Irina."
This was certainly interesting news, maybe even good ones.
Irina was the one of the sisters I'd had the least contact with whenever we had been visiting our extended family in Denali. I barely knew anything about her, other than the basics, I'd learned from the others. She, like her sisters, was a succubus, and therefore always eager to get laid … a lot. Of course, she'd stayed away from me, because I've been supposedly mated to Alice back then, and because she was scared a little of me. Irina had tried her luck with Edward, but only once. Apparently she was a little smarter, or less masochistic than her sister Tanya, who always tried to get into Edward's pants, but failing each and every time. It was very entertaining to watch them, her persistence and his resulting discomfort.
Kate, on the other hand, was an exception among her sisters. For one, her succubae tendencies weren't as prominent, and secondly, she preferred to play for the other team, a fact I wasn't sure everyone knew about (apart from Edward, of course). She seemed to be a very private person.
Eleazar and Carmen were the equivalent to Carlisle and Esme, acting as parental leaders of their coven, although they didn't share a blood or venom relationship with the sisters. I've spent some nights talking with Eleazar, me sharing some of my past with Maria, and him telling me about his time among the Volturi guard. Sometimes Carmen had joined us, but she wasn't as willing to talk about her past as her mate.
It was safe to say that the Denali coven was the closest thing the Cullens had to extended family. We shared the same lifestyle, as in the same diet and the same views. None of the sisters had to pretend to be high school kids, like we had to do so many times.
"Oh, and you think, because of his alliance with them, he owns us the same courtesy?" I countered.
"Well, it's certainly a possibility. He knows about our strong connections with the Denali coven. And I know Irina is one hundred percent loyal to her family and to us. If she'd have to choose I'm sure she'd choose her family over him. You know how tight they are. She and her sisters are both blood and venom related. There is no tighter bond than that." She argued heatedly. Mere out of instinct, I wanted to respond something, anything, but the sudden spike in Charlotte's emotions stopped me in time, before I could make a fool out of myself. From the corner of my eye I could see Char nodding her head emphatically. Now that I knew about her gift, I took her reaction as silent confirmation. It gave me some needed comfort.
"Let's hope you are right about that." I remarked, addressing both of them, but keeping my eyes on Rose.
"Well … how about we find out?" She proposed, pulling out her cell phone, skimming through the directory.
"Who are you calling?" I asked.
"Kate." She said. I was surprised, but I didn't demand an explanation. She clearly had her reason for calling her instead of Irina. And maybe it was the better to ask Kate for information than Laurent's mate. If he betrayed her, she might not be very forthcoming.
The phone rang four times, before it went to voicemail. Damn. Rose left a short message, asking for a return call. She tried to sound nonchalant, but wasn't completely convincing. But maybe that would work into our favor. The sooner we would get answers the better.
"Well, I guess we have to have a little more patience." She shrugged, sounding slightly disgruntled. Well, she wasn't the only one who felt that way. Patience wasn't one of our strong suits, even with infinite time at our disposal. That, I'd learned fast.
But I knew this wasn't the time or the place to panic. After all, I was still a soldier, a strategist. I could wait a little longer for answers. As long as we had a plan, we had nothing to worry about.
I straightened up in the seat, slightly shifting Bella's position on my lap. "Okay that's what we are going to do. We will stay together until the situation with the wolves and Laurent is resolved. No one goes out alone, is that clear?" Every vampire nodded in agreement. Peter was the only one who wore a slight smirk on his face. I ignored it, but only because I knew he didn't think this was funny, no, he was just pleased to see the old me. We shared a brief look, and a nod, and then I turned my attention towards my mate. "From now on, there is always going to be someone with you, Bella. And please don't start to argue, because this isn't up for discussion. I won't allow anything happening to you." I tried my best not to sound like Edward, but the truth was, I didn't care if I did. Her safety was way too important to me. I was surprised but utterly pleased when she didn't put up a fight. She wasn't happy to be told what to do, but she seemed to comprehend that the situation called for some safety measures.
She smiled up at me. "Well, I don't mind having you around all the time." She crooned.
"Careful what you wish for, darlin'." I playfully growled into her ear, and she shivered in delight. "I might just take you up on your offer. Although, we should probably be careful around the Chief …" I didn't get to finish my thought.
"Charlie." Bella exclaimed, jumping to her feet. "What time is it? Past six already … oh shit, I have to go. My Dad will be home soon and I have to make dinner." She frantically went to search for her things. I stared after her dumbfounded, as she made her way upstairs. A few moments later she was back at the top of the stairs, utterly breathless, but now wearing her boots.
"Easy, there, Bella." I tried to calm her, but she wouldn't have any of it. She came down, reaching for her coat, Charlotte was handing her and then she was out of the door.
I followed her outside, with the rest of my family on our trail.
She stood on the porch, searching for something. "Where the fuck is my truck?" She turned around, glaring at Peter. I could feel Emmett's and Rose's immense amusement. Both of them hadn't heard Bella using any kind of foul language before today. But I had come to witness more than once already what did lie underneath the surface. What she had shown Edward and the rest of the Cullens had been just a façade, an image. I loved the Real Bella, and her foul mouth.
Peter grinned. "I've parked … er, stashed your vehicle behind the garage." He said. Bella frowned at him, but didn't ask for a reason. She simply shrugged and made her way around the garage to her truck. The rest of us followed her.
She sat behind the wheel, trying to start the engine, but the ignition didn't fire. She gave it a few more tries, before she slammed her hands down on the wheel in resignation.
"My truck won't start." She cursed loudly. "Peter, what the fuck have you done?" The grumpy look on her face was truly adorable.
"I haven't done anything, little lady." Peter defended himself. Bella grumbled something unintelligible, clearly not believing him. I didn't either, not completely anyway, because I could tell he was hiding something from me and from her. But sensing Bella's urgency to get home in time, I discarded my suspicion … for now.
But before I could offer her a ride on my back, Rose stepped up. "No biggie, I can take you home." Rose said, surprising all of us. "I'll even take a look at your truck later, if you want." She added, phrasing her offer carefully. "I'm sure I can fix whatever is wrong 'til morning."
"That would be nice. Thank you, Rose." Bella replied. Both women smiled at each other tentatively. It was another, very important step in their blooming relationship. I could feel it. And I was happy about it, no question there, but I still felt robbed of the possibility to take care of my mate.
Bella reached for her back bag, and then she climbed out of the truck, leaving the key stuck in the ignition.
Then she looked at me and saw the sad look on my face. She dropped her bag to the ground and threw her arms around my waist. I pulled her closer, not wanting to let her go.
"I know you'd like to take me home yourself, Jasper. But I think you really need to hunt." She said, tracing the circles underneath my eyes. I was a little hungry, as expected after all that emotional drama. "I'll be fine with Rosalie, I promise."
"Yeah, I know." I replied, grumpily.
"You're cute, when you're pouting." Bella remarked, kissing me once, swiftly. "I'll leave the window open for you." She whispered, winking at me.
"You'll better." I growled, pulling her in for another, more passionate kiss. When I let go of her, she stumbled back slightly, fighting to catch her breath. "And you're cute, when you're blushing." She stuck out her tongue, and I chuckled at her silly antics. She grabbed her bag and followed Rose to Emmett's jeep. The rest of us tagged along.
"I guess I'll see you guys tomorrow." Bella said, before climbing into the passenger side of the jeep.
"Don't worry, Jasper, I'll make sure she gets home alright." Rose promised, getting behind the wheel.
"I know." I replied, adding in a low voice, inaudible to a human ear, "Please stay with her until her father gets home." I pleaded. She nodded once, closing the door. Then she rolled down the window, leaning her head out and saying her goodbye to her husband in a form of a short, but loving kiss.
"See you, Bella." Emmett called out, clearly fighting the urge to call her 'little sis'.
"See you, Emmett." Bella replied, just as awkward. But she gave him a little smile, which lightened up his mood marginally.
Rose closed the window and then they drove off. Just like this morning, I stared after them, until the vehicle vanished completely from sight. I reluctantly turned around to discover the only person left in the yard was Peter. And he was grinning like a fool.
"You've orchestrated this, didn't you?" I accused him.
"I have no idea what you are talking about." He said, turning his back on me and strolling back into the house.
A few months earlier …
Edward POV
I couldn't take it anymore, I simply had to leave. Hiding in my room, going hunting on my own, avoiding the remaining members of my family most of the time … it wasn't working for me, not anymore. I needed a break, mentally and physically. A place where it was truly quiet and no thoughts of resentment, guilt or sorrow could plague my already tortured mind.
Rosalie called me a moping idiot out loud and in her mind, more than once. We've never been very close, so her resentful behavior didn't come as a surprise to me. She was deliberately trying to get a rise out of me, using me as an outlet for her anger, but I didn't care. I was just glad that she avoided me otherwise. Ever since we've arrived in Alaska she's spent most of her time either with her mate or Kate.
Esme, being the loving mother that she was, tried to give me space and time to grieve my loss. While my sister blamed me for everything that had gone wrong in the recent past, my mother felt nothing but sympathy for my situation. Though I appreciated her sentiment, I wasn't sure I truly deserved it.
Rosalie wasn't that far off the truth with her assessment. I was to blame, at the very least for the feeling of loss my family was experiencing after our departure.
Emmett and Carlisle agreed with their spouses, for the most part, willingly following their example by leaving me alone, for which I was more than grateful, considering their own mental state. But then again they had every right to be angry and disappointed in me.
The fight we've had back in Forks was still fresh in my mind. How could I forget that? It has been the worst fight we've ever had, as a family, even worse than the argument we'd had after I'd saved Bella's life for the first time, by jumping between her and Tyler's van. Back then they had been angry with me for acting so recklessly, putting our very existence at risk, by exposing our secret to a human.
But now things were different.
A lot has happened in the meantime. Against all odds, Bella has managed to become a true member of my family … a beloved daughter, a little sister, a treasured friend. And how could they not love her? She was literally the personification of pure goodness, an angel, someone who should be protected at all costs, especially from a monster like me.
Although I hadn't expected anything less, I still had been a little surprised by Emmett's passionate reaction. He had fought so hard, not holding back one bit, attacking me with words only, but still … his words had managed to cut me deeper than a set of vampire teeth could have. I knew he still hated me for denying him his simple request, the chance to say goodbye to his little sister in person instead of dumping her like trash on the side road (his words not mine). I was certain he would have tried to remove more than one part of my body, if he'd known how exactly I'd ended things with Bella.
I could still see her face in my mind. I would never forget how sad she'd looked, how hurt and broken, when I'd told her that I didn't want her anymore, that I didn't love her and that I was leaving, and taking my family with me. I still couldn't believe how easy it had been to convince her. It might sound cruel and completely out of line, but the truth was that I'd expected it to be harder. I had been prepared to argue, to make her see reason, but Bella hadn't put up much of a fight, simply nodding in acceptance, almost like she had been waiting for it to happen.
How could she believe me so fast? I'd told her time and time again that I loved her. And she had responded in kind just as often. Then why hadn't she fought more? Was I such a convincing liar? Apparently … but in the end the reason didn't matter. I was relieved, because her quick acceptance had made things a little easier for me. I knew I shouldn't feel glad about it, but I was.
Without a doubt, I was physically strong, but mentally … not so much. I wasn't sure I would have been strong enough to uphold my charade for long if she'd reacted differently, if she'd actually argued with me.
In fact, there was another thing, an important detail, Emmett didn't know about. I've been very close to give in to his demand, allowing him to see Bella one last time, as long as we would to take our leave in the end.
I wasn't deliberately cruel, just desperate … desperate to give Bella what she truly deserved: A demon-free life, a human life with all its pleasures and opportunities, things that I could never offer her … a physical relationship, a real family, a true future.
But Alice's timely interference had prevented me from verbalizing my offer, stopping me from making things worse than they've already been. We all knew better than to ignore her visions, and since nobody wanted to harm Bella further, we'd heeded her warning words and left.
It was the right decision. I was sure about that. As much as it pained me to be away from Bella, to see my family suffer, I still believed it was the only real choice left. Sure, at first I've only blamed Jasper, but to be honest his reaction at Bella's birthday party was just the tip of the iceberg. I should have known better. We all should have known better.
We were death in disguise, end of story.
True, for years we've tried our best to better ourselves. We've tried to live in a world that was no longer ours. But try as we might, we could never be one of them again.
We have been deluding ourselves. Allowing a human in our midst, pretending that it was alright, that it was safe. But I've been the biggest fool of us all. I should have listened to Jasper's and Rosalie's warning. Bella wasn't one of us, thereby in constant danger of getting herself hurt or even worse, killed.
But I've been arrogant and selfish, driven by the urge to prove myself and the desire to solve the mystery that was one Bella Swan, which was why I'd disregarded all warnings. But it was stupid to believe that spending time with Bella, getting to know her would make things easier, that I would get used to her alluring scent. The fact remained the same. Every moment I spent in her presence I had to fight the urge to sink my teeth into her neck and drain her dry.
It still made no sense to me, that I'd been able to suck out James' venom back in that dance studio in Phoenix and thereby saving her from becoming one of us.
I still felt bad about the fact that I'd sort of lied to her in the hospital. I'd told her my love for her has been the sole reason to stop in time. But the truth was that it was mainly the fear of her becoming a bloodthirsty vampire that had given me strength to accomplish the task in the end. But how could I have told her that?
It was a miracle that it had worked at all. She tasted even better than she smelled. Only thinking about the taste of her blood made my mouth water with venom.
And she had no idea how much harder it had become to be around her after that day.
Mind over matter … I'd told her once. Yeah, right, that was just bullshit.
Every time she'd kissed me after our return to Forks, the burn of bloodlust in my throat had increased tenfold. I'd stopped spending the night lying next to her. Instead I'd retreated to her rocking chair as soon as she'd fallen asleep, only to return to her side when she'd started to stir. One more thing she didn't know about.
So why did I stay? Because, despite all the obstacles, I did love her. And how could I not? Everybody loved Bella, even Rosalie … in her own, special way.
Bella was unique. She had the purest soul I'd ever encountered.
And what did I do?
I broke her.
I broke the girl that I loved.
I should have stayed away from her from the start. It was stupid to believe that getting to know her would make things better, easier. Bella had no place in our world, not only because she was human and thereby weak. She was simply too good, too precious. I knew that she would have sacrificed her humanity and her soul to spend eternity with me without a second thought, because she loved me that much. She had told me so at prom.
But she didn't understand the consequences. She didn't know what she was giving up. And she certainly didn't know what it meant to fight the lust of blood each and every second, of every day, for an eternity. It was a never-ending struggle.
I went south … on foot, of course. Taking my car with me was out of the question. It had a GPS installed, and with that it would have been too easy to track me down. But I didn't want to be found. I wanted to be alone. And I didn't need a car to get around anyway. As much as I enjoyed speeding down an empty highway, I preferred running. Feeling the wind, the speed, the freedom … was truly exhilarating and the only feeling of true joy I knew … besides playing my piano.
Aside from a change of clothes and some writing material, I'd packed enough cash to last me for a while, years perhaps, since I didn't really need anything. Of course I'd taken my cell phone with me, just in case. But I left it turned off. For one, I needed to save the batteries. Out here in the wilderness it was very hard to find a socket to charge them. But more importantly my family could have used it to pinpoint my location, in the same way they could have done with my car.
Of course I appreciated modern technology. How could I not? A lot has changed since my human days, especially in the last decade, and most of the improvements turned out to be very handy, even for a vampire. But right now I hated those tiny devices, those chips, making it possible to locate me wherever I was hiding. Like it wasn't enough to have a sister who could track each and every move I was planning to make.
But I had another reason for leaving my phone off. I knew that Esme and Carlisle would try and check in with me. Even though they were not that much older than me, physically, and with Esme being indeed younger than me in vampire years, they had easily replaced the set of parents I'd lost all those years ago. I had the utmost respect for Carlisle and Esme, loved them with all my (dead) heart. I wouldn't have been able to ignore the ringing for long. This way it was much easier. I hated causing them more pain, but I needed time. I would call them … when I was ready.
I found a small, vacated hunting cabin in the woods of the Rocky Mountains, far enough away from any human population. Considering the less than perfect shape of the cabin I didn't expect anyone to show up here and reclaim this place. It wasn't like I really needed a place to stay, but I welcomed the prospect of having a roof over my head, just in case I needed shelter from the weather. Maybe I just was too used to having some comfort at least, but in any case, it was nice to have a place where you could sit or lie down, even if I didn't have the need to rest, physically.
I did clean up the place as best as I could, even making some minor repairs, like fixing the windows and the damage of the roof. For now, it would suffice.
It was beautiful out here … and oh so quiet. It was just what I needed right now. No thoughts of any kind, slowly driving me insane, only the sounds of nature. It was pure bliss.
I didn't know how long I was going to stay here. I had no real plan. I just wanted, no needed some time to rest, to come to terms with all the things that had gone wrong over the past weeks, or months. In a house full of vampires it had been sheer impossible for me to relax, to heal, but out here, I was free to let my mind wander, and to drown in my guilty feelings.
Alice had been the only person who'd tried to reach out to me, but I didn't want her help. I didn't really feel I deserved anyone's help or sympathy for that matter. I'd come to the conclusion that I had no right to mourn my loss at all. I had screwed up everything. Sure, it had been Jasper who'd lunged for Bella, but it had been me who'd caused the actual damage to her fragile body. And that was just one more reason, why I had to leave Bella. I couldn't be trusted around her.
And now I was alone.
At least that's what I thought. For the last couple of days I couldn't shake the feeling that someone or something was watching me, following me whenever I was outside hunting or simply strolling through the area.
First I thought it was Alice. Even though I'd told her not to follow me, I wouldn't have been surprised if she'd gone against my wishes. It wouldn't have been the first time. I knew that she had been planning to leave the family as well. I had read it in her mind. But just like me she hadn't made up her mind about where to go to or what to do next.
The compassionate part of me still hoped that she would go and search for Jasper, despite the things she's said about him not being her mate. To this day, I had no idea if it was true, but deep down I was sure that she still cared about him, just like I still cared about Bella, even though I'd left her. Despite his actions and the resulting consequences, he was still part of our family. He deserved forgiveness.
Maybe Alice wanted to give me a head start, and some time alone, before she would finally catch up with me.
But then again if it had been Alice, she would have shown herself, instead of playing cat and mouse with me.
Whoever it was kept his distance. I couldn't pick up the scent of another vampire, or the usual tenor of a mind, always warning me in advance whenever someone was close. But there was nothing, no thoughts, no scent. Maybe I was just imagining things.
There is no one out here in the woods … just you and wild animals … I assured myself, more or less convincingly, before I made my way back to the cabin.
A/N Sorry that it took me so long to update, but I hope I've made up with the length of this chapter. Unfortunately, RL sucks right now therefore I can't promise you a quick update for the next chapter. I'll try my best, though.
So Edward is alone after all or at least not with Alice. Hmm … what a mystery. Why would Alice lie to Esme and Carlisle, telling them that she was with Edward? Any theories?