I do not own the How to Train Your Dragon franchise.

An Explosive Snoggletog

"I think I have frostbite on my spleen."

Astrid arched an eyebrow at Hiccup's declaration and turned to glance at the skinny boy. Hiccup had his arms wrapped tightly around his torso, a pout on his face and his helmet sagging over his forehead. It was not often Hiccup wore the headgear his father had given him, as he feared that he might lose it. But the weather on this particular Snoggletog season was close to being deadly and Hiccup needed his breastplate helmet to keep his ears from freezing off.

"Well, it's definitely colder than it usually is." Astrid agreed. "I tried to take my axe off of the wall this morning for practice and it was stuck there. The ice had frozen it to the wood."

Hiccup let out a sigh and watched as his breath formed a cloud in the air in front of him. "Do you think there's a place out there where there's sun all year round?"

"Yeah, it's called paradise and it doesn't exist." Astrid said with a wistful frown. "But we can dream."

"Dude, that is so gonna hurt."

The two teens swivelled their heads upon hearing the gleeful exclamation. They were greeted by the sight of Tuffnut with his tongue stuck to a metal pole. Ruffnut and Snotlout were laughing hysterically, leaning against each other to keep from collapsing into the drifts of snow.

"Uh, I thought it was my turn to dare somebody." Astrid spoke up as she and Hiccup approached their friends.

"It is. But since when does Tuffnut need an excuse to do something stupid?" Snotlout asked with a wide grin.

Astrid thought this over. "I can't believe I'm saying this, but good point."

"Come on, it's Snoggletog." Hiccup said in exasperation. "Can't you guys be nice to each other for one week without taunting someone to do something idiotic?"

Ruffnut jerked her thumb at her brother. "It was his idea."

"Oh. I…I honestly don't know what to say to that."

"Best not to say anything." Astrid advised. She walked up to Tuffnut and studied him. The tip of his tongue was firmly attached to the metal and the Thorston boy was obviously uncomfortable. He shot the blonde a pleading glance and Astrid felt a stab of pity. "Sorry, Tuff. But we're going to have to yank you free."

Tuffnut whimpered in response. Astrid grabbed hold of his waist and Hiccup offered his hand. "Here, you can squeeze it if the pain gets really bad. It might help a bit."

Normally a person who lived for pain, Tuffnut had a feeling that this particular moment would not be the type of pain he enjoyed. He grabbed Hiccup's hand and gave a reluctant grunt to let Astrid know he was ready.

"One…two…three!" Astrid pulled with all her might and Tuffnut squeezed Hiccup's hand at the same time. With a cry of agony Tuffnut was pulled free and Hiccup was sure some of his fingers were broken. Astrid let go of Tuffnut. "Are you okay?"

Tuffnut prodded the tip of his tongue gingerly, noting that some of the skin had been torn off. "I gwess swo."

"Yeah…you might sound like that for a while." Hiccup muttered, flexing his sore fingers to ensure that no severe damage had been done by Tuffnut's grip.

A soft dragon growl caught their attention and the teens turned to see Toothless gazing at them curiously. Now what are you doing? Toothless wondered.

"Hey, bud. Don't worry, we're not doing anything stupid."

"Yet." Snotlout sang.

Toothless did not look convinced. He noticed that one core member of the group was missing and shook his head. Alright, who killed Fishlegs?

As if reading his mind Hiccup turned to Snotlout. "Hey, where's Fishlegs?"

"Where do you think? He went to that island with Meatlug so that she could hatch her eggs." Snotlout rolled her eyes. "The guy can't leave his dragon for more than a few hours without freaking out."

Astrid's eyes widened as an idea struck her. "I wonder how Stormfly's doing."

"If you want, we could go visit." Hiccup offered. "The eggs shouldn't be hatching for another hour or two."

"That'd be nice." Astrid smiled innocently. "I just want to grab my satchel from Ruffnut's place before we go. I'll met you at the docks."

Hiccup gave the girl a salute and went off with Toothless. Astrid grabbed the puzzled Ruffnut by the arm and dragged her away. "Ruffnut, when I get back with one of Stormfly's eggs, I dare you to plant in the chief's house."

"On Snoggletog?" Ruffnut asked in disbelief. "Didn't we promise Hiccup we'd take a break from the dares for the holidays?"

"I didn't promise." Astrid smirked. "I said that I would try my best not to dare someone. Besides, I'll make sure he doesn't see me take an egg."

"You know, I can't believe we managed to get to Snoggletog without getting this dare-off found out." Ruffnut paused. "Well, that might change after this."

"Well, I'll miss you when you get banished."

"Please. If I get busted, I'm bringing you jerks down with me."

"Oh, shut up and get me a satchel."

…

It was roughly fifty minutes later that Astrid returned with Hiccup. She bid her friend a quick goodbye and raced to the Thorston household with the satchel clutched tightly in her grip. She hammered on the wooden door and almost dislodged the decorations that were hanging on the roof.

"What's the fire?" Ruffnut asked, flinging the door open.

Astrid grinned. "Fire hasn't started yet." She handed Ruffnut the satchel. "I suggest you hurry. You got about ten minute before the baby hatches. This was laid a while ago."

Carefully taking the satchel Ruffnut nodded and took off, her feet sinking into the deep snow. She reached the Haddock household and spotted Hiccup playing with Toothless in the snowdrifts. She slipped past them and entered the house, listening intently.

Zzzzzt.

Stoick was sleeping.

Ruffnut froze and stared at the satchel in her hands as a wicked idea struck her. Unable to resist the temptation, Ruffnut tiptoed into the chief's bedroom and rolled the dragon egg under Stoick's bed. With quick speed she charged out of the house, this time catching the attention of boy and dragon.

Hiccup's eyes widened with horror. "Ruffnut, what did you-?!"

Boom!

"AAGGHH!"

Ruffnut paused in her sprint to watch as the chief flew through his roof, flying through the air and crashing into the snow below, debris raining down on him. She pressed a hand against her mouth to keep from laughing out loud and took off before she was spotted by the enraged Viking.

Hiccup could only gape and Toothless rolled his eyes. I'm getting out of here. Stoick will want to kill someone and it'll probably be one of us. Survival of the smartest.

Toothless waddled away and Hiccup swallowed thickly. A baby Deadly Nadder tumbled down the front steps and cooed happily. It stumbled over to Hiccup and whined hopefully. Hiccup bent down and picked up the purple baby Nadder just as his father stormed into view, his finally-even beard covered in snow and his chest heaving with rage.

Hiccup stared up at his father, the baby dragon clutched against his chest. "What. Was. That?" Stoick asked, his voice strangled by rage.

At a loss for an excuse, Hiccup gave a meek smile and uttered, "Uh…surprise! Happy Snoggletog!"

Dare suggestion by Guest.

Next chapter: In which Ruffnut dares Snotlout.

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!