I do not own the How to Train Your Dragon franchise. Song sung by Snotlout is called Song of the Viking by Todd Rundgren. I obviously do not own the song, and I changed one word to Snotlout's.

Snotlout's Turn for the Dress

The snow continued to fall at a steady pace, but the winter wind had died down so that going outside was bearable again. The Snoggletog decorations had been stripped from the houses some time ago and poor Hiccup was still in the process of repairing the hole in the roof of his house.

Astrid and Fishlegs peered up at the lanky teen, who was crouched on the wooden rooftop. A hammer was clutched in one hand and the other held the nail to the wood. His face was a mask of concentration and so his friends did not disturb the boy until he had finished driving the nail through the wooden plank.

"Snoggletog was two weeks ago." Astrid called up. "You haven't finished covering the hole yet?"

"I had to fix my father's bed first!" Hiccup snapped back. "And that took a considerable amount of time."

"What did you do with the baby dragon?" Fishlegs asked curiously.

"We gave it to the Horkglan family. Their children always wanted their own dragon and we know that they'll take good care of it." Astrid answered, her gaze still locked on Hiccup. "Hiccup, be careful. The roof is icy and-"

Hiccup's prosthetic foot struck a patch of ice at that very moment, causing him to lose balance and tumble down the roof. With a yelp of panic Hiccup flew off the edge and slammed into his friends, who did not have time to get out of his crash path.

"…your prosthetic foot doesn't have much grip." Astrid finished with a slight groan.

Hiccup rolled off of his friends and they climbed to their feet. "Okay, that was smooth." Hiccup muttered, his face flushing from embarrassment.

"Tell you what, I'll help you finish the repair." Astrid decided. "Your father is doing his rounds on Thornado-he won't be back for a few hours."

"No, no." Hiccup said quickly. "You don't have to-"

"No buts." Astrid punched his shoulder affectionately. "I kind of got you into this mess anyway."

"You guys are crazy." Fishlegs shook his head. "But you got off pretty lightly, Hiccup."

"You're telling me." Hiccup muttered. Unable to come up with a solid, believable excuse for why there was a dragon egg underneath his father's bed, he had kept silent during his father's interrogation. Completely frustrated by his son's odd behaviour (something he figured he would never get used to) Stoick grounded his son for three weeks and ordered him to make the repairs on the roof and on his mangled bed.

"Come on, let's get this thing fixed. Fishlegs, you want to help?" Astrid asked.

"I'd love to, but I have to feed Meatlug." Fishlegs smiled apologetically. "But good luck. Try not to break anything else."

Astrid rolled her eyes at Fishleg's retreating back. "Some faith."

"We'd better get to work. The last thing I need is my father to return and find you helping me." Hiccup shuddered at the very thought. "I want to live to see my next birthday."

The two got back on the roof and continued the work, hammering the boards securely over the hole. When they had finished Hiccup studied the wooden patch and shrugged. "It'll have to do. Thanks for your help, Astrid."

"Anytime."

"Yo, what are you guys doing?"

Astrid and Hiccup peered over the edge of the roof and saw Snotlout staring up at them. "Just finished repairing the hole." Hiccup answered.

A grin curled across Snotlout's face. "I so wish I was there to see the look on your father's face. I bet it was priceless!"

"The look on your face when I tell you your dare will be much better."

Snotlout stiffened and glanced over his shoulder to see the twins approaching. Ruffnut had a smirk on her face, and that meant something bad was going to happen to him. "Um…what?"

"Snotlout, I dare you to dress as a woman and sing in the highest voice you can manage in front as many people as possible."

Snotlout gaped. Hiccup and Astrid burst into laughter. Ruffnut grinned victoriously. After a moment of stunned silence Snotlout let out a groan. "I hate you so much right now."

"Hey, Fishlegs did the dress thing, Hiccup did the dress thing, now it's your turn." Ruffnut said reasonably.

"I'm out! No dress thing for me!" Tuffnut danced triumphantly. "Looooser!"

Snotlout punched him in the shoulder. "Shut up. At least I have a chance of winning this whole dare contest." He turned to the female Thorston and frowned. "When does this thing do down?"

Ruffnut tapped her chin thoughtfully. "Well, I think it would be best if you did it on the roof of the Great Hall, like when Hiccup and Astrid had their 'wedding'. You can do it before supper, when everyone starts gathering in front of the doors."

"Fine. I'll be there." Snotlout grumbled.

"And because I'm such a good friend, I'll help you with your makeup and everything." Ruffnut patted Snotlout on the shoulder with a smug smile. "It'll be my pleasure."

As Ruffnut escorted the sullen boy away, Tuffnut, Astrid and Hiccup exchanged gleeful glances.

They could not wait until suppertime.

…

"I. Am. Going. To. Kill. You."

The words were spit through gritted teeth as Ruffnut tied his choppy black hair together with a piece of a blue ribbon. Ruffnut could not stop laughing, bent over from hysterics as she attempted to complete Snotlout's look.

"O-O-Okay," she wheezed. "I-I'm done."

Snotlout looked down at himself with a scowl. He was wearing his mother's old white dress, which had blue buttons and a blue hem. Lace decorated the collar and his feet were squeezed painfully into Ruffnut's spare boots. His cheeks were pink, his lips painted red and nails painted blue.

"Oh, this is brilliant." Ruffnut cackled. "I can't wait for everyone to see this!"

"Oh, shut up." Snotlout snarled. He stormed away from the girl and towards the Great Hall, which was thankfully deserted for the time being.

"I can't believe I'm doing this." Snotlout muttered to himself as he climbed up to the roof. Once he was up he lay flat against the planks so that he wouldn't be noticed straight away. Ruffnut had instructed him to wait until a sizeable crowd had gathered in front of the doors before starting his performance.

If Fishlegs and Hiccup can do this, then I definitely can do this.

After a few minutes Snotlout could hear the murmurs of his fellow Hooligans as they chatted amongst themselves. A sharp whistle suddenly cut through the chatter and everyone paused, probably to see where the whistle had come from.

Unfortunately for Snotlout, the whistle was meant for him.

Taking a deep breath the boy climbed to his feet and stood up, in full view of the Hooligan Tribe. A shocked silence descended over the Vikings as they stared at the Jorgenson boy, at a loss for words. Snotlout could see his father, at the front of the crowd (or course) gaping at him.

Face red, Snotlout kept his eyes locked on his friends, who were killing themselves laughing. In the highest voice he could manage, Snotlout began to sing the song Fishlegs had used in a previous dare.

I am a Viking of some note.
Snotlout's my name and here I float.
Out on the sea in a great big boat.

His voice cracked on the last line and his singing was interrupted by a bout of coughing. But he quickly recovered, determined to finish his dare as fast as possible and leave before his father snapped to his senses and came up to grab him.

And I'm the one who beats the drum in time,
To stroke the oars that drive our galleons on.
And while we rowed we had our-gack!

This crack in Snotlout's voice was the loudest and by far the most painful. Snotlout tried to press on, only to find that he could no longer produce words, just soft hisses and rasps.

He had lost his voice.

With no voice, he could not sing. Since he failed to fully complete the dare (Ruffnut probably wanted him to sing a full song) he knew he would be down one point. But he could continue, in some form, and perhaps use his improvisation to convince Ruffnut that he completed the dare.

And then he saw his father slowly regain his senses, his face turning red from fury and humiliation.

Fail it is.

"Wow," Ruffnut mused as she watched Snotlout scramble off the roof and take off. "I've never seen him run that fast before."

"I've never seen Spitelout run that fast before."

Dare suggested by Fantasy-Dweller.

Next chapter: In which Snotlout dares Hiccup.