Trigger warning (sexual assault) towards the end
Chapter 8:
"Why didn't you talk to me about this sooner?" my mother says with tears in her eyes. I have spent the past ten minutes explaining the past week, from the lecture at Georgetown to spending the night on Spencer's couch.
"I didn't want to discuss this when you were drunk" I reply. "Wait, so you knew about this?" I retort back harshly. She doesn't respond. "You knew all of this time that I had a half brother?" I say calmly, keeping myself in check.
"I didn't know much about him when your father left, I didn't think it was worth perusing" she chokes out.
"I was under the impression for fifteen years that I was an only child," I reply while trying to hide the anger in my voice, "Do you have any idea how lonely it's been?" I say on the verge of tears.
"I'm sorry" she replies, face staring at wood floor. I look her up and down and suddenly I feel sick.
"Yeah, me too" I snap back and quickly make my way to the staircase. My mother is crying, but she doesn't say a word.
I go to open my bedroom door and remember that I pushed my dresser in front of it approximately fourteen hours ago. I kick the door out of anger and rest my forehead on its frame. I breathe in and out. I gather myself.
After a few minutes I climb out the window of the hallway, leading me to the landing on the roof, where I take three steps to my bedroom window that I left cracked. I lift it open and climb through, greeted by Penny sitting a few feet away.
"Hey sweet girl" I coo and run my hands through her fur. I walk over to my door and push the dresser out of the way. I got into my closet and quickly change into workout clothes. I slip my running sneakers on and I'm out the door.
"Lia!" my mother yells after me but I ignore her. I concentrate on my feet hitting the pavement. A variety of turns later and I'm in Ethan's front lawn. I see his bike locked on his front porch so I'm sure he's home from school. I catch my breath and knock on the door.
"Hey" Ethan welcomes in a slightly confused manor.
"Hey" I pant and walk into his front hallway. I make my way into his living room and crash onto his couch.
"What's up?" Ethan asks and sits down next to me. I pause.
"I talked to my mom about Spencer" I throw out into the air, "And I stayed at his apartment last night" I inform him and let it sink in.
"Damn" he replies and puts his feet up on the coffee table. "Why'd you stay at his place last night?" Ethan asks gently.
"We were just going to watch star trek and he was going to take me home, I had to stop at home and John was over" I sigh and bite the inside of my cheek, looking everywhere but at Ethan. His eyes soften.
"Was he messing around with you again?" he asks with a frown. I stare at the floor and a few tears escape my eyes.
"Yeah" I reply and wipe my cheeks.
"Did you tell Spencer what he's been doing to you?" Ethan asks although he already knows the answer.
"No, and I'm not going to" I snap back.
"Lia-" he tilts his head,
"No" I shoot back calmly. "He doesn't need to know" I mutter.
"Why are you wearing a turtle neck?" he asks skeptically. I gulp and pull down the fabric covering the red ring around my skin. Ethan sighs and doesn't say a word.
"Does it hurt?" he asks,
"Just stings" I reply softly.
Ethan leaves the room and comes back with a bottle of water and an ice pack, and hands both to me.
"Thanks" I reply and take a large sip of the water and rest the ice pack on the back of my neck. We sit in comfortable silence.
"How was school?" I ask, deflecting from my situation.
"It was school" he responds. I kick my shoes off and pull my knees to my chest.
"Here" Ethan says and hands me a throw blanket.
"Thank you" I repeat. He turns on the television.
"What will it be? Supernatural or Doctor Who?" he asks with a grin.
"Doctor Who of course" I smile back and make myself comfortable on the couch. We sit and watch for hours, snacking on popcorn and chatting about nonsense. For a while I forget about what's going on around me. I have Ethan to thank for that.
I'm snapped out of my trance by my phone going off at 7pm. It's a text from Spencer, explaining that he'll be away on a case for the next few days, and that he hopes I'm well.
"Hey, can I sleep over?" I ask Ethan cautiously.
"I already figured you were. Its friday" he replies with grin. I smile back. "I'll make us hot chocolate" he announces and runs off to the kitchen. A warming sensation spurs in my core and radiates though out my body.
I am at ease.
We fall asleep on the living room couch at around midnight. We wake up at exactly 7:34, stretching our arms and yawning.
"Coffee?" are the first words out of Ethan's mouth.
"Of course" I say on towards the end of a yawn. We both stand up and make our way into the kitchen, I throw myself onto the barstool in front of the granite counter. Ethan fixes my coffee exactly the way I like and passes it to me. I take a sip and Ethan takes a seat next to me.
"You're the best" I nudge him with my elbow.
"Oh I know" he replies in a cocky tone. We both laugh. We finish our coffee in a matter of ten minutes.
"I should get going" I announce after my last sip.
"You sure?" Ethan raises. .
"Yeah, its cleaning day" I reply and slide off of the chair. "Thanks for being you" I grin and punch him lightly in the shoulder. "I'll see you on Monday"
"Ooo, Lia's going to school on a Monday!" Ethan mocks as he follows me to the door
Fuck off" I giggle and exit his front porch.
I walk block to block clearing my head, observing the way the trees sway and the noises of the early morning. My head is clear as I walk up the grass to my front door. I unlock it and enter into a silent house. I make a bee line straight up to my room, where I kick off my shoes and take off my shirt, leaving me in just compression pants and a sports bra. Penny trots out of my closet and weaves in and out of my legs, purring. I crouch down to pet her and I hear the stairs creek.
"Mom?" I call out from the other side of my room. I don't get an answer. I walk toward my bedroom door and pull it open.
My heart almost stops. It's not my mom.
"Long time no see" my mother's scum of a boyfriend hisses from my doorway.
"What do you want?"
"A deal" he cocks his head and crosses his arms.
"What are you talking about?" I scoff and lean against my wall.
"You're aware that I've been paying the mortgage on this house for the last 4 months, correct?" he replies and the knot in my stomach is back.
"I guess my mother forgot to mention that" I say in an irritated tone.
"Well, you see, if I stop paying, you get evicted. And you don't want that, do you?" he spews and advances towards me. I take a step back.
"So, you give me what I want, and I'll make sure you keep this roof over your head" he proposes like a business deal, my stomach churns and my throat runs dry and begins to crack. I gulp and shake my head left to right vigorously.
"No, no" I choke out, sweat building on my upper lip. My heart feels like it's going to come out my mouth and my blood runs cold.
John grabs my neck and my eyes bulge. I can't breathe until he releases his grip and shoves me back onto my bed. I cough twice and suddenly I'm face down in my pillows. I try and scream but he's holding his hand on the back of my head and I can't make a sound. I squirm with every ounce of energy I have in my body but it's not enough, because next I know my pants are being torn off and I'm pulled towards his sweaty body. He flips me over and before I can scream his hand is over my mouth.
Next thing I know he's inside of me, thrusting into me over and over and over again, relentlessly. I start to cry continuously from the pain and the unwanted presence of his filth in my body. After using all every inch of myself to get out of his grip, I give up and go limp, staring up at the ceiling fan. It feels like hours pass by until a weight is literally lifted off of me, John's weight. He pulls his pants and buckled his belt. I slowly sit up like I'm in a fog. I pull my underwear back up and realize I'm shaking. I wipe my cheeks and cough numerous times as I try and catch my breath. John's going on and on but I can't seem to hear him.
My mind runs blank.