Chapter 1
Five months ago.
The blaring noise of the alarm clock jolts me awake and I have never been more grateful for anything in my whole goddamn twisted life!
Ever since that incident all those years ago I have barely had one night where I didn't get nightmares….but that's not even the worst part! The night terrors wouldn't be as much of a big deal if I could actually wake from them, my psychiatrist at the time could not understand this either, she thought I had lost the will to get out of it…..that I had given up fighting. But god knows all I had been doing, every single night for the past 5 years IS fighting….fighting and hoping….hoping that if I cannot get rid of the ugly nightmares altogether then at least I can try and be able to wake from them on my own, that one day I wouldn't need the assistance of an alarm clock or someone jolting the life out of me to put me out of my misery.
Pushing all these grim thoughts from my mind I clamber out of bed casting a nasty glance at the alarm clock where a display of 5:05 a.m. mocks me in an ugly neon green light…..Great! Again only 3 hours of sleep, I am going to ask Maria to re-assign me if this is how my life is going to be as an agent on the Avengers initiative.
Over the past few years SHIELD has become the one constant in my tumultuous life. No matter how much I complain about routines, drills, lack of sleep etc. etc. I can never forget how much SHIELD has helped me in restoring a certain semblance of normality to my life, however bizarre the word normality and shield might sound together.
After my incident I was so…..distorted. I had no sense left of where to go and what to do, SHIELD gave me a purpose. I was recruited two years ago owing to my shockingly excellent computer skills, shocking because I was a literature major and THAT is what I still see myself as, a literature lover. But Fury has always maintained that he approved of me not because Maria Hill picked me out personally or because of my skills, at least not my computer skills. He thinks I have a way of connecting with people, 'making an impact' as he so often likes to put it.
Maybe that was the reason why he put me under Agent Phil Coulson for training. Phil too happens to be someone who believes in saving people rather than just dumping them all in 'The Fridge' only because they happen to be different or that they made a wrong call.
Second chances, people often undermine the importance of them. They can save a life in so many ways , can restore so much that was destroyed. We all need faith….not in god, not in some cause, not for someone else but more importantly We need faith from someone. Just knowing that someone truly believes in you can do wonders and THAT I learned from Phil. I miss him. Ever since I completed my training I had been working under him, until a week ago when I was pulled out and reallocated to the close knit team that would assist the world's mightiest superheroes, the avengers. I know it sounds very cool and everything and I am sure it is, cool. But I finally had a team that I loved like family and had an excellent working rapport with, and here starting from the scratch all over again is although exciting but is also making me miss my former team like hell.
I head straight for the shower and turn the dial to as hot as I can get the water to be…..whatever happened, I can barely bear the cold after that. I quickly wash my long brown hair, Reminder: get a haircut soon…and also some groceries you hippie! I groan as I realize I don't even have coffee, Guess will have to stop by Starbucks again. I wash myself as quickly as I can. All these years and I still can't bear to touch my own skin without shuddering. Sighing I wrap a towel around me and step out.
Standing in front of my wash basin I finally look at myself. Heart shaped face, pale skin, average height, round mouth that is a bit too full for my liking….every bit ordinary. I sigh and try to push those words back to some dark recesses of my mind. I quickly brush my teeth and get ready, make up has never been a strong suit of mine but I do love a good mascara and eyeliner. So I quickly apply those, it does make my powder blue eyes stand out. I always thought my eyes were too big for my face but my best friend Al seems to disagree and he knows way more about looks than me so I decide to make the best of them.
I quickly get dressed in black boots, black jeans and a black tank top that has a small SHIELD emblem on it. I am really a sucker for black clothes but then isn't everyone?
The sound of my front door opening startles me a bit but then I remember that he is too impatient to wait for me to answer.
I peek out of my closet and there he is…..my rock. It seems I can never be mad at him so I gave up a long time ago. He places his stuff on the coffee table and turns to give me his patent toothy smile but as soon as he looks at me his smile falls.
"Remind me to get some food in you one of these days and yeah some sleeping pills too." He says, coolly. The tone is both exasperated and sarcastic. Classic Al.
"A very Good morning to you too. Don't you look lovely today Best friend." I return with the most sickly-sweet smile and double the dose of sarcasm than he had.
He plops down on the sofa and starts fiddling with TV channels. While I hunt for the coffee I am sure he got me. One sip and I am in the best mood possible! The chocolate muffin only making my already elated self-more and more giddy…..God I love this stuff! A slight snort makes me look up from my coffee for a second.
"Seriously 'lena If you like food so much then get at least SOME in your fridge. It's really hard getting up at five and walking all the way here so that you don't bite someone's head off at work in a caffeine-deprived frenzy." He seems oddly pleased with his own joke so I let the jab slide.
"You live across the hall; it's probably 30 steps from your couch to mine!" I can't help but state the obvious for this dumbo.
"Walking is walking babe." He tries to give me his sexiest wink, Now that may work with those blond long-legged models he works with but I fortunately have grown immune over the years so instead, I throw the balled up muffin wrapper at him which he starts to lick clean. I can only laugh at this gorgeous spectacle of a man who became my entire strength reservoir over the past 2 years.
When SHIELD inducted me I moved to this apartment and this is where I met him. He is quite the Casanova. But never once did he try to hit on me and that is what helped me open up to him. He reminded me what it was to just hang out with someone and be yourself, what it was to trust someone with your demons, and how better the take outs tasted when you had someone to share them with.
People often assumed we were dating. I used to correct them but now I don't bother anymore, no one believes what I have to say anyways. They just assume. God knows how many women Al had dumped because they wanted him to stop talking to me altogether. I mean I can understand the assumption, he is awfully good-looking. At around 6 foot tall with blue eyes, dark copper wavy hair, chiseled jaw, lean athletic physique, he can put a GQ model to shame. And the fact that he is a famous fashion photographer only adds to the package. But that was the thing…No one bothered to look beyond all this.
Al, the Al I know is so much more than just a good package. He has faced so much. With a troubled childhood filled with beatings and drunk, quarreling parents….It's a miracle that he turned out to be the gem of a person that he is and maybe that is the reason I was able to connect with him so quickly.
Beeping of a text on my phone pulls me back to the Now. It's a text from Maria. Strange. I am meeting her in fifteen minutes at the HQ and she never texts.
The text reads:
Meet me at the Cuban coffee house in ten.
Uh oh. I know this tone. It can only mean...
She has an assignment that I am not going to like very much. Damn.
Maria was the one who hired me, she and I…we are close to say the least. She is very 'mother hen-y' when it comes to me. And if she doesn't like it and couldn't do anything about it that can only mean one thing: That I can't either.
Giving Al a quick kiss on the cheek and grabbing my black jacket I dash out of the front door. It's raining, making it harder to drive. Finding a spot for parking I get in the coffee house as quick as I can but my hair still gets wet. This day is not looking up, is it?
It hardly takes me a minute to locate her; she is the epitome of class I have to say. Sharp, intimidating, stunning, witty….every bit a woman I aspire to become one day.
She smiles when she sees me and I can only wonder at how motherly her smile is. I smile in return. But I can also notice the tightness around her eyes. This does not seem good.
"You know one would think that you are absolutely destitute and have only one pair of clothes." And here it begins. She makes it a point to remind me on a daily basis that I should wear some colors.
"Well, what can I tell ya, My boss is a pretty miserly old hag who doesn't pay me at all." That earns me a light chuckle.
"What is it, Maria?" I ask turning a little serious. She takes a sip of her coffee all the while not looking at me and then she does…. And I can see I am no longer talking to my mother hen but my commanding officer Agent Maria Hill.
"I have an assignment for you." She hesitates.
"I figured that much." I try to make the mood light but apparently it isn't working.
"You have to….you have to do kind of surveillance." She says in a not so happy tone.
"I know I should ask who it is but I am more concerned with the "kind of". What do you exactly mean?" I am confused.
"We are anticipating a potential threat and have called for some consultants from Asgard who can help us best prepare for the situation. Now as you know that Thor is a part of the Avengers initiative so He will be a part of the party arriving and so will be his friends Sif and Fandral." She takes a pause. I don't say anything because I know there is more.
"Also with them will be coming…Loki." And just like that it all becomes clear. I sit back in shock and probably skip all the rest that she has to say.
"I am a computer specialist. Why me? There are people who are trained for this sort of thing" I can't keep the irritation out of my voice.
"Fury's orders." And I know that is all the explanation I am going to get.
"What did you mean by kind of surveillance?" I can't help but feel uneasy.
"You will have to accompany him wherever he goes in the SHIELD premises and keep a close watch, He won't be allowed to use any magic or go outside but apart from that he would be free, so just to make sure that he doesn't do anything fishy we need to have someone monitoring him all the time." She pauses for a breath.
"Now I know you hate sitting around, much less for babysitting so Fury wants you to be present around him during daytime and at night I can have someone else watch him on a surveillance camera." She finishes and sits back watching me with ill-concealed wariness. I am not mad, just a little disappointed. If there is a potential attack I would like to be of SOME use! Not babysitting some mass-murdering brat! But her face tells me she tried to argue but to no avail.
"Is that all? I mean...that is the whooolllleee reason why I am being assigned to this duty? No alternate agenda here?" I ask quirking an eyebrow. With SHIELD there is always more.
"Even if there is…you and I wouldn't know about it, you know Fury. So are you in?" She finally smiles her loop sided smile.
"Do I have a choice? It's Fury. I would baby sit the hulk if he wants me to." And I would. Because I know that whatever he does, it goes a long way in saving millions of lives that SHIELD saves every day.
"So when do I start?" I ask after a beat.
"In Ten minutes." She says while standing up.
And just like that we leave for HQ.