I hope you enjoy this chapter... and all my love to Jess and Sandra, as usual!

Chapter 17 – Bowling

Killian started to notice that Emma Swan was not only immersing herself in his investigation, but she was also weaving herself into his entire life. She spent several hours in the station and in addition of a budding friendship with Mac, she had also become close with some of the other officers.

It should not have come as a surprise when he was informed by Mac that she'd been invited to their monthly bowling league night.

"You WHAT?" Killian asked.

"We're one player short; Bobby busted his wrist on the last raid. So we all voted and chose her."

"I didn't vote." Killian cocked his eyebrow at him.

"Oh come on, don't tell me you have a problem with her coming to bowling night?"

"Really, mate?!"

"You'll thank me one day," Mac stated.

"No, I will not." Killian replied.

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Emma entered the bowling alley and looked for Killian. When she spotted him, she almost died at the sight of him in jeans, black bowling shoes and a black bowling shirt with two red stripes. She approached him with a huge grin on her face and then she noticed that the shirt even had his name on it.

His look was as menacing as when they were fighting lost boys. "Don't say a word, Swan." He threatened.

"I wouldn't dream of it." She said. "I'll just take pictures instead."

He invaded her personal space, as he did so many times in the past, his face lowering as he spoke in her ear, "You do remember that I'm a dangerous, vengeful pirate, love?"

She looked at him with her green eyes full of determination, "Are you going to lock me up in a cell again? Or handcuff me somewhere?" She said seductively as she headed to the table where the rest of Killian's colleagues were sitting. She stopped to turn her head around, a flashing smile on her face, "Coming, pirate?" She asked in a velvety voice.

"Aye, milady." He replied mischievously before following her. A little bit later, they were sitting next to each other, beers in their hands.

"I have to confess…" She said in a whispered tone. "It's hard to picture Captain Hook bowling."

He chuckled and took a sip of his beer, "I know… But it was an important thing at the station and it's actually something I can do with one hand." He replied honestly. "I've tried, but I'm not much into sports. I don't see the point in most of them, to be honest. But this, it's kind of entertaining in its own way. And I get to spend time with the other officers."

"Are you any good?" She asked.

"You'll see right away, princess." He smirked as he got up and headed to the lanes.

It turned out he was a decent player after all, Emma thought. This was completely her opposite, as she was terrible at bowling. At some point, Killian just took the ball from her hands and spoke to her in a commanding tone.

"Just go sit down and drink your beer, Swan. You are dooming us, darling."

"So much for being the savior." She teased and he grinned at her, placing his hand on her lower back as he accompanied her to the table where the rest of his female coworkers were.

"Sit here and let me handle this one, love." He looked at her with mischief in his eyes, biting his lower lip.

God, she'd missed his flirting.

"Well," Emma said sighing to Killian's colleagues. "It seems I've been banned from the lane."

"Oh, don't worry about it." One of them, a brunette, said in a chipper tone. "We really cannot care less about the score. We just come here to admire Jones in all his glory."

"And tight jeans." Another added.

Emma struggled with the jealousy that was slowly creeping on her. "Jones, uh? You think he's that attractive?" She asked nonchalantly.

"Oh yes. Don't tell me you haven't noticed." They looked at her. Emma shrugged. "Well, I suppose he's kind of cute." She lied through her teeth and took a huge gulp of her beer; letting them carry on with the conversation and hoping she didn't have to add anything else. She knew exactly how Hook looked, she just felt weird discussing it with other women.

"He goes beyond cute. That man is impossibly good looking. You should see him on Hallowen. He dresses like a pirate, complete with a long leather coat, rings and guyliner. He actually gets a brace and a hook. It's the most sinful thing you've ever seen. It should be illegal." Emma couldn't help but smile at that comment. She knew exactly how illegal that look was. First hand.

"Whoever is doing him is a lucky woman." Emma choked at those words. Was he doing anyone?!

"I don't know, I haven't seen him with anyone in a long time."

"A guy as hot like that, there's no way he's not getting any. Look at him! I'm going to faint any minute…"

"Imagine being the one that gets to keep him. Oh… how we hated Rebecca in the beginning." Emma's interest peaked as she heard the other women speaking of Killian's ex. Although she hated to admit it, she had often wondered what Rebecca was like.

"Yeah, but she made him happy… I still don't know why they broke up. They were so cute together."

"Mac thinks he's not over someone. From before he came here… He thinks he was in love and got his heart broken."

Emma's heart stopped at those words. His heart broken. Killian had had his heart broken and she knew exactly who'd done it.

"Who would reject someone like Killian? You had to be crazy. He's not just hot; he's actually a decent guy. Remember how he treated Rebecca? Like she was a princess, like she was the only woman that existed…"

"Like he would go to the end of the world for her…" Emma whispered, unable to contain her sadness and jealousy. She realized that she'd said the words out loud and she smiled awkwardly, "I imagined based on what you were saying." She trailed off and looked at Killian standing by the bowling lane, laughing with his friends.

You had that. And you let him go.

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Shortly after that, Emma was standing by the counter getting another drink, when she felt a familiar voice whispering in her ear, "Are you having a nice evening, Swan?"

She turned around and found Killian smirking at her, "It's ok, I guess. I could think of a few more enjoyable activities, though."

Killian cocked an eyebrow at her, his eyes darkening, "Really? And what would you have in mind, love?"

Just when she was about to reply, she heard a female voice coming from behind Killian.

"Killian?"

Killian's face changed from smirking into a complete and utter painful shock. He turned around and Emma saw a brunette standing in front of him. She seemed familiar.

"Rebecca?" Killian asked and Emma's heart stopped for a second.

Son of a bitch.

She was breathtaking, she could see that. And she was looking at Killian with an apologetic smile.

Killian stared, shocked, at Rebecca. Of all the nights he could've run into her, of course it'd be today. He silently cursed himself and tried to smile.

"Hi…" He said in a soft voice. "How are you doing?"

"I'm fine." Rebecca replied with a soft smile on her lips. "I'm really sorry, I forgot today was bowling night… otherwise I wouldn't have come." She said biting her lower lip in an apologetic gesture.

"Don't worry about it, love. It's a free country after all." Killian smiled softly at her and noticed Rebecca shifting her gaze behind him. He turned around to find a very uncomfortable Emma watching them.

Bloody Hell.

"Rebecca, this is Emma. She's working with us on a case." He said shortly. "Emma, this is Rebecca." Emma waved her hand and Rebecca nodded her head. Killian wanted to crawl behind the bar.

"Well, I should get back to my friends." Rebecca smiled and he could see the hidden pain behind her eyes. "It was good seeing you, Killian."

"Aye, you too." He replied before watching her walk away towards her friends. He sighed deeply, running his hand through his hair, feeling the guilt already flooding him.

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Four. Four shots of rum. Killian had washed down four shots of rum in between beers in the last half hour. Emma knew because she had counted them as she sat next to him in silence, waiting for him to say something. The moment Rebecca had walked back towards her table, he sighed deeply and sat down in the bar and ordered his first drink. Now it was four down, and one more in his hand. She cleared her throat and he looked at her, pain and regret in his eyes.

"I'm afraid I'm not much good company, Swan." He sighed. "You must forgive my rudeness… it's been an unexpected turn of events." He said as he looked in the direction of Rebecca's table.

Emma knew she shouldn't ask; it was truly none of her business. But she had to know.

"How long were you with her?" She asked.

"A little over six months. I'd been here for a couple of months and I'd only hung out with Mac and some guys from the station. We were out having some drinks one night and she was sitting at the counter. Mac dared me to hit on her. You know me; I've always loved a challenge." He smirked sadly. "So I went there and offered to buy her a drink with all the intention of hitting on her, perhaps lure her into my bed and never see her again. Somehow, between the first and the second beer, we started talking and I walked out of that bar only with her phone number. It took me two days to call her and ask her to lunch. After that, things just happened: I enjoyed spending time with her; she liked spending time with me. Before I realized it; I was in a relationship. Why wouldn't I be in one? She was fun, beautiful, she made me laugh, and she wanted me. She didn't run away from her emotions and she didn't run away from me."

"Wow… she sounds perfect." Emma stated without helping but feel hurt and betrayed.

"She was. She is. Just not perfect for me." He sighed, running his hand through his hair one more time. "And I knew it… part of me always knew that I wasn't in love with her. I cared deeply for her and I really tried to love her, but I couldn't. So I had to let her go…. It was hard to do, because she made me happy, happier that I've been in centuries, but I couldn't do that to her. I cared too much about her to let her believe in a lie. She deserved better."

"I'm sorry, Killian. I really am." It was all that Emma could offer him.

"You know, this is the part where I am a gentleman and say It's OK, Swan, this had nothing to do with you…" He looked at her with his intense blue eyes, "But you and I both know, it'd be a lie." He finished as he drowned his shot.

Emma looked at him and fell silent.

He sighed again. "Ok, this is my cue. I've drunk too much and I've already started to confess things that not only will I regret in the morning, but that will earn me a nice push back from you. Actually, it's a bloody miracle you haven't left yet. You did hear me admit that I broke up with her because I was still in love with you, right?"

"Killian…" Her heart broke for him.

"Why are you still here, Swan? That was your cue, this is the part where you tell me that it's not that simple, that is not what it seems, that you don't exactly feel the same way, that you are not in the mood, that you cannot take a chance that you're wrong about me or some sort of magnificent excuse to walk away from me when I'm baring my heart and soul to you. So tell me, darling, why aren't you walking away?"

"Kilian, I'm sorry, I-" She tried to explain but her cut her off.

"If you were going to actually stay and have this conversation, why couldn't you do it three years ago? Before you broke my heart?"

"I'm here now, Killian. I know that it can't be easy for us to talk about it, but I'm willing to try…"

"That's the funny part, Swan. I'm not in the mood." He put some money on the counter and stood up. "I'm going home. Mac or one of the guys will escort you to your car or if you don't feel like driving, just let Mac know and he'll have a patrol give you a ride. Get home safely." He finished and walked away from her.

He found Mac by the bowling lanes. "Mac, I'm getting a taxi and going home. I'm done for the night. Please make sure Emma gets home safely." He said.

"Killian, what happened?"

"I ran into Rebecca." Killian sighed. "I don't want to get into this right now, Mac. Just make sure she gets home safely."

"I will. See you tomorrow, Killian."

He knew he should have stayed. Emma Swan was finally willing to actually stay in a conversation about feelings. But he couldn't do it anymore. He couldn't open up to her again and risk getting his heart broken. He'd never come back from it.