Chapter 5 – falling for you

All Alex wanted to do right now was appreciate the quiet moments. It didn't matter what else was happening in her life, she needed to focus on the here and now, the things that were so simple but also so hard to get. Her and Piper had been officially dating for a month now, but they kept it pretty quiet. Alex felt like the quieter they were about the relationship, the less likely she was to fuck it up. Amazingly for Alex, they still hadn't slept together. Alex didn't want to ruin it, she didn't want to just rush into sex knowing that Piper had never slept with a girl before. She wanted to wait until she was sure Piper was ready. It was a Wednesday night and Alex had gone straight to Piper's place after her shift finished. She lay on Piper's new couch, her head resting in Piper's lap, feeling the blonde run her gentle fingers through her hair, occasionally brushing her cheek. Alex closed her eyes, this felt so good, so safe, so intimate. She kept her eyes closed, enjoying the moment while Piper read a book. Before she could open her eyes, the front door swung open loudly and Lucy came barging in. "There you are! Mum wants you to come home, dinner is ready." Alex was slightly startled by the disturbance, "Geez Luce, learn to fucking knock in the future." Alex slowly lifted her head from Piper's lap, and saw the smirk on her sister's face.

"Are you guys a couple now or something?"

"Would you shut up Lucy! C'mon, let's go before mum gets even more pissed." Alex just wanted Lucy to stop talking, but Lucy was only just starting.

"Piper, you should come too. Mum always makes plenty of food."

"I'd love to come, if you think your mum won't mind?"

"No way would she mind! You're a lot nicer than Alex's last girlfriend, she was crazy" Piper couldn't help but laugh at how easily Lucy could make her big sister squirm. Before Alex could say another word, Piper grabbed her hand and led her out of the apartment. "She's just winding you up Al, let it go" she whispered into Alex's ear before gently kissing her cheek. Alex relented, but gave Lucy the biggest glare as they walked towards their apartment.

Lucy led them back to the Vause apartment where Diane was setting the dinner table, "there you are," said Diane as she noticed Alex and Piper holding hands, "things are getting more serious between you two by the looks of it," Diane winked at her daughter and offered a smirk.

"Yeah, they're a couple now, so I told Piper she should come to dinner." Lucy stated as she got napkins for the table.

Diane could see Piper looking embarrassed and couldn't help but laugh, she stopped Piper before she could say anything, "It's all good Piper, you should definitely stay for dinner. Lucy, remember when we talked about being less bossy?"

"I'm not being bossy, I just wanted Piper to come for dinner." Just as Lucy was about to continue protesting, Robbie walked in the door, having just finished work for the day.

"Hey Robbie!"

"Hey Lucy," Robbie smiled down at her before walking over to Diane and kissing her on the cheek.

"I invited Piper over for dinner, she's Alex's new girlfriend," Lucy was obviously keen to tell everyone about the new relationship. Alex just rolled her eyes at her sister, "Seriously Lucy." Before Alex could say anything else, she noticed a weird look on Robbie's face before he dragged Diane into their bedroom.

"What was that all about?" asked Piper.

"I think I have an idea," Alex knew exactly what it was about, she could now hear raised voices coming from the bedroom.

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"Are you really just gonna sit there and let this happen! Are you gonna let Alex flaunt her bulshit behaviour in front of your ten year old!"

Diane could not believe what she was hearing. Robbie had never raised Alex's sexuality before, so she was shocked to hear him ranting about it now that Alex had a girlfriend. "What the fuck is wrong with you Robbie, she isn't flaunting shit! She brought her girlfriend over for dinner, who happens to be really fucking nice. That girl is good for Alex, how can you not see that? That girl is making MY daughter happy, she's keeping her grounded and out of trouble. Alex might not be perfect but her heart has always been in the right place. You know she's had it tough, why can't you just be happy for her?"

"Why can't you see that she's a fuck up Diane? It doesn't seem to matter what the fuck Alex does, you always defend her. How about you take my side for once!"

"Don't you dare call her a fuck up, you don't know what she's had to deal with growing up! She is not a fuck up, you just need to give her a chance, she's fucking 19 years old. She's never had a father figure in her life, instead of having a go at her why don't you try getting to know her?" Diane had had enough of Robbie's attack on Alex. Yeah, Alex had made her fair share of mistakes, but when Diane looked at Alex all she could see was herself. She knew Robbie and Alex didn't always get along, but she never knew it was this bad. "If you can't accept my kid, I want you out of here."

"Don't be fucking ridiculous Diane. What, you gonna go back to working 70 hour weeks just because you refuse to see the problems with Alex?"

"I don't give a shit how much I have to work to take care of them, but they deserve to have people around them that care. And if you don't care about Alex, if you're so fuckin' put out by the fact that she has a girlfriend, you can get the hell out. I can never put you before my kids Robbie, never."

"It's not just the girlfriend Diane, it's everything. She's getting into fights, getting drunk, getting high, is that how you want Lucy to end up?"

"You'd better stop talking right now, Alex would do anything for Lucy. Alex has had her fair share of fights, but she has never exposed Lucy to drugs or alcohol, never. And you know what, she's an adult, I'm not gonna tell her what to do. She is trying Robbie, she's trying so fucking hard, why can't you see that?" Before Diane could continue, Alex burst into their bedroom. Diane had seen that look on her face before, and she knew what it meant. Diane immediately went to Alex, placing a hand on her chest, "Alex, why don't you just go back out there with Piper and Lucy, we're nearly done here," she could feel the tension in her daughter, could feel her heart pounding, could see the anger in those green eyes. Diane knew how deeply Alex felt everything, and sometimes Diane just wanted to protect Alex from herself. Alex wasn't listening, and Diane moved her hand to Alex's face, forcing her daughter to look her in the eye, "Baby, you listen to me ok. Everything is ok, I want you to calm down, please, for me. Once you're calm, we can all talk about this, but not now, not when you're this worked up." Alex looked back at Diane with glassy eyes, "please don't be upset baby, go back out there with Piper and Lucy." Alex just nodded, and turned to leave the room. However, she stopped when Robbie spoke up.

"What the hell is wrong with you huh, pulling that shit in front of your sister?"

Alex turned around to face Robbie and walked towards him, "do you really have that much of a problem with me, just because I'm gay? Or is it for some other reason? Let me guess, you got the hots for Piper and you can't stand the fact that she wants me, not you." Before Alex could do anything Robbie's eyes filled with rage as he grabbed her by the shoulders and slammed her into the bedroom wall, maintaining a tight grip on her.

"Get your fucking hands off her!" Robbie stood back, angry. He said nothing, picked up his jacket from the bed and stormed out of the apartment. Alex was still standing against the wall where he'd pinned her, "I'm sorry Ally, did he hurt you?" said Diane, tears welling in her eyes. Alex just shook her head and pulled her mum in for a hug. "I'm sorry mum."

"You have nothing to apologise for baby, but you need to stop pushing people's buttons, even if they're in the wrong. You remember this, you're gorgeous, you're kind, and you got a lot of love to give. Piper is good for you, she's an amazing girl. Don't you ever let anyone tell you there's anything wrong with you. Robbie will come around, he just needs to blow off some steam."

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Alex decided to spend the night at Piper's, she just needed a bit of space. She knew she'd have to try and explain the situation to Lucy, the poor kid was completely confused by what happened that night.

"Ok Al, it's time to tell me what's going on, what's happened between you and Robbie?" Alex just sighed, moving to the edge of Piper's couch. She slowly leaned her elbows on her knees and put her head in her hands, it would be so easy to fall apart right now, but she wouldn't let herself.

"Pipes, I don't even know where to begin."

"That's ok, but this situation between you two is starting to scare me. You need to be honest with me, you can trust me Al, all I want to do is help you. Just let me help you, please." Piper took Alex's face in her hands and kissed her deeply, holding her gaze as she pulled away from the kiss, "You don't need to hide anything from me."

"I know, it's just, I've only ever said this stuff to Nicky, no one else knows. I'll tell you, but you have to promise that you won't tell anyone. I'm not ready for my mum to know, and I don't want Lucy to ever know."

"You're scaring me Alex."

"Promise me."

"Ok, I promise."

Alex took a deep breath before she started talking, "Look, this shit between me and Robbie has been going on for about five months now. He was fine in the beginning. Then he just started acting weird, he didn't deal well with the whole gay thing. Then one night he caught me sneaking home drunk and he just lost his shit. Ever since that night, every now and then, when he gets me alone he gets aggressive. At first it was just some pushing and shoving, then it got worse."

"What did he do?"

Alex sighed, looking straight ahead, avoiding Piper's gaze, "Stupid bastard always made sure he never left any marks on my face, except for once." Piper put her hand on top of Alex's, rubbing it softly, "He….he just started making weird comments. Saying I couldn't know I was gay if I'd never been with a man. Then, I guess he decided to take that lesson into his own hands."

Piper was horrified, she could not believe what she was hearing. In barely a whisper, she asked the question, "did he rape you?"

"No….just groping so far. Tells me to let him do it, get it out of his system before Lucy gets older." Alex's eyes started to well with tears, "I just got so scared when he said that, I couldn't take the chance that he'd ever do anything to Lucy. He can do what he likes to me, but if he ever touched her, I actually think I'd kill him." Piper let the tears fall down her face as she pulled Alex into a tight hug.

"Shit, Alex, I'm so sorry you've had to deal with this. I can't fucking believe he's done this to you, he can't keep doing this to you Al, this isn't right, we need to tell Diane."

"And he's just gonna tell her I'm a liar. Look Pipes, I'm the family fuck up, what if she doesn't believe me?"

"Al I've seen you with your mum, and I just can't see her not believing you. She adores you, she trusts you, she's got no reason to not believe you."

"Yeah but she's got a reason to want to keep Robbie around, it's only because of him that she can be home so much with Lucy these days."

"Alex, he is abusing you, you can't just say you'll put up with it so Diane can be home more," Piper felt herself becoming frustrated, but tried to stay calm.

"You don't get it Piper! You come from a different world, you've never had to struggle for money, struggle to keep the lights on and buy a fucking loaf of bread! That's what it was like for us." Piper stopped, she knew they didn't have much money, but she didn't know it was that bad. She knew her and Alex came from different backgrounds but it never mattered, it still didn't. But Piper did start to realise that she would never understand some of the struggles Alex had to deal with, struggles Diane dealt with.

"I'm sorry. But please this can't go on, we'll figure something out, I'll help out with the money just please, we need to tell Diane."

"I don't want your money Piper! I'm not some charity case you need to feel sorry for."

"No, you're not, you're my fucking girlfriend! You're my girlfriend that I'm completely falling for! My girlfriend that just told me she is being abused in her own home! So yeah, I'm gonna do whatever I can to get you out of this situation Alex, why can't you just stop being an ass for five minutes to see that?"

"Wait, you're falling for me?"

"Yeah, I guess I am."

"I'm falling for you too." Alex leaned over and pulled Piper into a hug, she felt a wave of relief wash over her, it felt good to tell Piper, but it was terrifying at the same time. Piper gently rubbed Alex's back, and kissed her cheek. Alex couldn't take it anymore, and let the tears fall silently at first, but the tears then turned into heavy sobs. Piper just tightened her grip on Alex, all she wanted to do was protect her, take away her pain. "Shhhh, it's ok, I'll always be here Al, you'll always have me." The two just sat there on the couch, Piper holding Alex while she cried, cried out all the tears she had been holding onto for months. Eventually, Alex exhausted herself and fell asleep in Piper's lap. Piper kept her arms wound around Alex tightly, afraid to let go. Then, there was a soft knock at the front door. Piper didn't want to wake Alex, so asked who it was from the couch, trying to not be too loud, "It's Diane."

"Oh, door's open." Diane then walked into Piper's apartment and saw the two girls on the couch, saw Piper holding onto Alex while she slept.

"How's she doing?" asked Diane, fear in her voice.

"Honestly? Not good, she's struggling right now, all she's worried about is what you think of her. I really care about your daughter Diane, all I want to do is keep her safe, and I'm starting to feel like she's not safe around Robbie."

"He's not a bad guy Piper, he just loses himself in the moment sometimes."

Piper didn't know what to say, she wasn't going to say anymore without discussing it with Alex, but she was starting to see how little Diane understood about the situation. Piper just kept her eyes on Alex, who was still sleeping, her head in Piper's lap, her hands grasping Piper's t-shirt. There was something almost childlike about Alex in that moment, the way she grasped onto Piper so tightly while she slept. Piper just absentmindedly kept running her hand through Alex's long dark hair, avoiding Diane's gaze.

"She's always been a handful," Diane started speaking again, smiling as she remembered Alex's childhood. "She didn't take no for an answer from anyone, and she always stood up for herself, too much sometimes. It doesn't matter how old she gets, she'll always be my little girl." Alex started to stir, rolling onto her back. She opened her eyes and looked up at Piper, before rolling over and seeing her mum sitting directly across from her. "I'm staying here tonight,"

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Alex stayed with Piper for three days before she went back home. It was nice, she could almost forget about what was waiting for her at home. Right now, she did not want to think about that, she just wanted to live in the moment. It was 9 am, and both girls had the morning off. Alex woke up before Piper, and just lay there looking at her. Piper was lying on her back, the sheet pulled up to her waist, exposing her breasts as she slept. Alex moved swiftly, until she was straddling Piper, who continued to sleep. Alex leaned down and ran her tongue over each of Piper's breasts, slowly trailing her tongue up Piper's chest and neck. Piper started to groan, but didn't wake up until Alex started to kiss her, taking her bottom lip between her teeth before running her tongue against Piper's, who moaned as she woke up. "Mmmhhh, I could get used to waking up like this." Alex deepened the kiss, as she rubbed Piper's nipples between her fingers. She started kissing along Piper's jawline towards her ear, sucking on her ear lobe, eliciting a long moan from her girlfriend. "Are you ready?" Alex whispered into her girlfriend's ear as she slowly moved her hand between Piper's thighs, "Yes" whispered Piper as she lifted her hips against Alex, desperate for more contact. Alex continued to kiss Piper as she moved her hand inside the blonde's underwear, instantly greeted by warmth and wetness. Alex started circling her fingers around Piper's clit as she kissed her breast, flicking her tongue over the nipple before grasping it between her teeth.

"Shit, Al, that feels so good," whispered Piper as she grabbed Alex's hair, still grinding her hips against her girlfriend. Alex slowly slid her hand down further, sliding two fingers inside Piper. Piper inhaled sharply and starting moving her hips in time with Alex as she moved her fingers in and out of Piper. Alex then deepened her fingers inside Piper before curling them against her g-spot, "Ahhgghh, fuck, Alex, mmmhh." Piper was about to lose control. She'd had sex with her fair share of men, but she'd never felt anything this intense. Piper moaned even louder as Alex inserted a third finger as she sucked on Piper's earlobe, "I want you to come for me Pipes,"

"Al, I'm so close, fuck."

Alex then moved so that she was straddling Piper's thigh, and started moving her own core against Piper's thigh as she continued to curl her fingers inside her girlfriend. Piper could feel Alex's wetness against her thigh, which drove her crazy. "Fuck, Al, you're…so wet."

"Mmmhhh, just touching you makes me wet Piper," said Alex in a deep and breathy voice. These deep words against Piper's ear drove her insane, and she felt her walls tighten as Alex pushed her closer to the edge, "you're so close, I can feel it, you're so fucking wet." Alex pushed her fingers in deep and curled her fingers one last time inside Piper, pushing her over the edge, "Mmhhh, Alex!" shouted Piper as she came harder than she ever had before. Alex slowed the movement of her fingers inside Piper, bringing her girlfriend down from the intense orgasm. Alex then leaned down and tenderly kissed Piper as she removed her fingers, wiping them on her boxer shorts. Piper was still breathing heavily, clinging onto Alex as she tried to regain composure, "shit, Al, that was amazing." Alex moved herself off Piper's thigh and lay down beside her, pulling her girlfriend into her arms, wishing they could stay in that moment forever.