Warning: There's a lot more swearing in this chapter, just so ya know.
Matt is frozen in his seat. Al agreed to share a table with him for another day but he can tell his brother is getting curious to Matt's actions. Matthew had come in and tried to talk to Matt right off the bat, but he ignored him. Matthew made a small sad noise and Matt could feel his heart break. It killed him to pretend Matthew didn't exist, but he kept telling himself 'Matthew deserves better.' His destructive thoughts got the best of him late at night. Now he's stuck in a sick cycle of self loathing. Matthew tries multiple times during the meeting to get Matt's attention, from calling his name, throwing things at him, and even standing right in front of Matt while the Spains talk.
Matt is struggling to keep up appearances, and Al's incredulous looks are not helping. He closes his eyes, though he's sure no one can tell through the blackness of his sunglasses. He's clenching his hands together in effort to not see Matthew's dejected face. He manages to get through the meeting, jumping to his feet the second it's over. He doesn't look back to the conference building and he doesn't go back to the hotel. Matt opts to go for a walk in the complete opposite direction. He gets lost a few times but he doesn't care. It's not until it's dark out does he even think of returning to the hotel.
His forlorn feelings and sadness have turned to rage. He's unreasonably angry at Luciano for being with Feliciano, sparking the hope that he might have been able to be with Matthew. He's angry at Al for pushing him to talk to his double, giving him the opening to get close to him. He's so angry for thinking that Matthew and he could even be together, angry at himself. Matthew is too good and kind for anyone and Matt knows that if they were ever to be together, Matt would be Matthew's biggest mistake. Matt just wants to get some sense smacked into his head, and he knows just the person to go to.
Matthew has never been more upset in his life. Yesterday had been awful, but he had been able to pass it off as Matt being shy and embarrassed by his actions. Matthew planned to talk him today, tell him that he didn't mind the kiss, and would be more than willing to have more of them, if Matt stopped being a brat. That doesn't happen though. Matt ignores him more today to the point where Matthew can feel his heart snapping in two like the wall Luciano punched during their last week of conferences.
It hurt so much, to be the center of someone's attention, to have them come to you first thing and leave you last, only for them to drop you because of one incident, that could be solved if he just stopped running away and listened. Matt always listened to Matthew ramble on about things in his life, hockey or snow or Alfred. Matt has always been there, and Matthew loves him for it. To have that ripped away from him hurts so much.
Matthew just wants Matt back. He wants Matt to stand next him looking tired and done with the world. He wants Matt to sit next to him and not pay attention to the meetings. He wants Matt to blush easily at the smiles that Matthew gives him. He wants Matt to show him that rare smile of his. He wants Matt back in his life. It's only been a day, and Matthew is falling to pieces without him.
Alfred leaves him alone this time. Matthew isn't as teary. He's clearly more mad. Alfred knows better than to mess with him during this flare of emotion. Matthew is kicking the furniture back in their room, trying to get some of his anger out. Kumajiro is scratching at the walls in reaction to his owner's actions. Matthew knows he's stupidly in love with Matt, and he just wants to tell him.
"What the ever living shit is up with you huh?" Al barks when Matt slams open the door to their room. He flips Matt off. When he doesn't respond, Al comes to stand right in front of him and shove him back. Matt still doesn't respond and Al bristles.
"You hear me lumberfuck?" Matt glares down at his brother. Al is shorter than him by at least a foot, maybe more, but Al is a firecracker and very impulsive, making him seem taller. He slams his hands into Matt again, forcing him to take a step back.
"I asked if you heard me fuck face. First you're all pissed off and moody, asking me to sit next to you, which I did without question, asshole. Then you run off, without your god damn cell phone, and don't come back till now? You made me worried about you, you shit eating fuck!" Al is pushing dangerously at Matt's buttons, and they both know it. Al has always been the best one to make Matt angry, knowing exactly what to say to put Matt on edge. Al slams his hands against him again, but this time Matt retaliates. He grips Al by his shirt, hoisting him off the ground, bringing them face to face. Al's only reaction is to glare harder.
"Get your bat Al," Matt whispers deadly then drops Al back to the ground. He stares at Matt for a moment before a wild, twisted smirk makes its way onto his face, a troublesome glint in his eyes.
"Good, give me a reason to beat the shit out of you for making me worried." Matt grits his teeth, stomping into his room. He drops to his knees and pulls out one of his hockey sticks, the one without the blade on the edge. Back in the living room, Al is waiting, a insane smile on his face, and a bat over his shoulder, the one without the nails. They never use the weapons embedded with metal. At least, not on each other.
"Fuck you," Al spits out. He lunges for Matt.
The room is completely destroyed. Tables and chairs are broken in pieces all over the room. Matt had thrown them at Al when he stepped out of range of his hockey stick. There's broken glass scattering the floor from the coffee table. Al pushed Matt down into it when he jumped on him to punch him in the face. The TV is on the floor from when one of them ran into it. Small dents cover the walls from their misplaced hits. There are tiny puddles of blood everywhere. They broke all the furniture in the room in some way or another. They swore so much Oliver's ears would have bled.
As their brawl started to slow down, their hits less forced and bodies aching with bruises, Al had screamed out if the reason Matt had been acting like a prick is because of Matthew. At the accusation Matt hit Al in the chest, sending him into the wall, before dropping to the ground and crying. Not a few tears quiet crying, full blown sobs that shook his body and made it hard for him to see. Al stood bewildered at the sight in front of him. Matt never cried. Maybe when they were younger but not now. Al knows he's the crier between them. Whatever had been eating at Matt really took its toll.
After Matt's initial break down, Al grabbed a first aid kit and some hot chocolate. He sat with his back to Matt's, their panting the only noise between them. Eventually Matt had enough in him to spill about how he felt about himself and about Matthew. He used as few words as possible. Al listened silently, bandaging his own leg, then moving to clean the glass out of Matt's arm. Both sporting bruises, split lips, and a black eye each. It would be healed within a week, but it still hurt.
"Fuck dude," is all Al said after he finished talking. For Matt, it had been the best thing for Al to say to him. He didn't want Al's comforting words, they both know Al is crap when it comes to saying compassionate things on his own. Their beat each other up sessions are their version of comfort.
They sit on the floor, in the middle of their tornado of a fight, unmoving. Al has enough air in him to softly sing a song that he knows Matt likes. The song is about a man coming home after a long trip to his loved one. It makes Matt tear up again, and he can't find the effort to care. Al has seen him at his worst, fought beside him at his best, and stayed through all the shit inbetween. He feels better after getting the crap beat out of him. His darker thoughts subside just enough for him to think clearly. Now he knows, he needs to talk to Matthew. Avoiding the situation will not help anything. Oh, and he's also an idiot for thinking that ignoring the situation would solve anything.
"We got to clean some of this up," Al says finally, when he finishes the song. Matt nods slowly. They don't move for another ten minutes. Al is the first to stand and Matt follows. They begin to make their way around the room, putting things into piles of broken pieces. It takes them an hour or two to clean up majority of the mess. Finding all the glass pieces being the worst job. Al huffs in satisfaction at their shabby clean up job.
"I'll have to tell sunshine we fucked up his room," Al snickers. Matt rolls his eyes. The fact Al can smile with a busted lip confuses him. Al places a hand on Matt's shoulder, but doesn't look at him.
"What are you going to do about Matthew? You can't keep ignoring the kid." Al's voice is gentle as it can be. Neither of them are gentle, the evidence for that all over the room, but this is their bonding and it works for them. Matt shrugs. He doesn't know how to face Matthew anymore. He doesn't even know if Matthew will talk to him, he knows he doesn't deserve it.
"Well, whatever you do, don't fuck it up." Al pats his shoulder awkwardly once and heads into his room. Matt sighs. He knows he can't ignore Matthew forever. It had been nearly impossible earlier that day. He grimaces at the idea of Matthew rejecting him now. If Matthew doesn't want to talk to him, then Matt will have to accept that he's made a huge mistake.
AN: Brotherly.. love? Maybe? Also I'm sorry? Not too proud of this chapter, but it's also my favorite cause Al? Question marks? I hope you all are enjoying it so far.
Disclaimer: Hetalia ain't no belong to me.