AN: I apologize for not updating sooner. Between the holidays which is very stressful on an autistic person and an ER visit, I haven't been doing well.
Not long after the new medication was introduced to John's system, Davis began noticing that he had some more trouble balancing and figuring out how to coordinate his body to move properly. Concerned, he called a meeting with the DeSoto's, Doctor Early, Karl, and Scarlett to explain what he was seeing.
"I'm not sure if this is just a typical reaction to the medication you put him on Karl or if this is just a side effect of the brain injury," he explained to the group.
"I've noticed in the last day or so Johnny seems a bit off as well," Roy admitted. "When I asked, he just said it was as if he was walking through mud and fog. I just assumed it a normal side effect of the mood stabilizer and once his body got used to it, Johnny wouldn't feel like that so much. I honestly didn't see his progress decline, let alone go backwards."
"It's okay, honey," Joanne assured him. "I didn't see anything out of the ordinary either."
"And that is why John has so many different doctors," Karl pointed out. "There is a lot of different areas that are important to his recovery and to have one person or even just you two responsible for making sure that Johnny is progressing as well as he can is just not reasonable. Think about this. Even though I have spent time with Johnny daily, although I did notice slower response times, it wasn't so bad as to think it was anything but the medication I had put him on. It is definitely not unusual for a person to be more tired and have that type of reaction for the first week on the medication."
"So, the question is, is it just the medication or is there more going on?" Scarlett stated.
"Well," Doctor Druthers pondered that for a while. "Although it isn't unusual for a patient who just started Chlordiazepoxide to feel the way John is, I honestly can't recall a case where someone had more issues with movement as you described. Yes, it could cause some weakness, but trouble with coordination? I don't think that is even a remote possibility. I could be wrong of course, but…"
"I agree. I researched the medication myself and even though it hasn't been used on patients in John's situation, I think I may have an idea what may be happening," Joe spoke up after listening. "I've seen his latest C.T. Scan and the swelling is continuing to go down and the bruises are healing slowly. One thing that can happen during the recovery from a brain injury is that a person becomes so exhausted, that they can become weaker and have coordination problems for a period of time. Usually, the exhaustion is caused by becoming over emotional, over stressed, working too hard or too much, but I think in John's case, the problem is the medication."
Seeing the confusion on Roy and Joanne's face, Joe explained, "The medication is making Johnny even more tired than he already is and that is taxing his body even further. Until his system is used to the medication, the medication is causing a reaction similar to what would happen if we pushed John too hard or he became too emotional."
"So, basically, this problem will resolve, but we just have to wait," Joanne slowly said.
"I believe so," Doctor Early said.
"What do we do in the meantime?" question Roy.
"Personally, I would suggest that Davis and Scarlett continue with the therapy program. Just make sure to watch Johnny carefully, take breaks when needed and make sure he knows that if he needs to rest, he can. Encourage him to rest more. We'll just keep doing that until he becomes used to the medication and is doing better," Joe assured them.
"Typically, it takes about a week, maybe two weeks at the outside, for someone to get used to the medication and dosage we have John on," Doctor Druthers said.
"But, what if this medication doesn't work?" Roy frowned, concerned as he knew there was no guarantees.
"Then, we try a different one," Karl said simply. "We may face the same issues again, but there is no set timeline here. We just keep working on getting Johnny better without pushing him so hard that we cause a setback."
Nodding, Joanne sighed and reached over to squeeze Roy's hand.
"Thanks, you guys. I can't tell you how grateful we are that you include us in these meetings," she said, her voice wavering.
Scarlett reached across the table and rubbed her arm as she assured her, "You two are the reason Johnny is doing so well. Without the love and support you have given him, he wouldn't be so far along as he is right now. Plus, the way your kids and their Uncle Mike have been here when they can has been invaluable. Your knowledge of who he was and willingness to just be there for him makes our job a lot easier! So trust us, it would be stupid of us not to have you in here helping us out!"
Smiling at her, Joanne just blushed while Roy cleared his throat awkwardly.
Feeling the two were unsure what to say, Karl took over, "How about we see if Johnny is ready for some more practice before lunch?"
Nodding, the two DeSoto's followed the therapists to Johnny's room while Karl and Joe headed off to accomplish other tasks. Now that they had a better idea of what was happening and what was ahead for their family, Roy and Joanne felt better than they had in the last two days.
I guess what they say is true…knowledge is power, Joanne thought as she looked at Johnny sleeping peacefully in his room. I just hope and pray that he can soon start getting used to that medication. I sometimes think that it is almost worse for him to be on it as he gets even more frustrated as he is struggling to do tasks he could do before. Yet, I know the cycles of depressions that he could plunge into so quickly and the rages that were springing up aren't good either. Nor were the frequent nightmares. It just seems like a no win situation for him…
Sighing, Joanne stopped outside the room and leaned back into her husband who wrapped his arms around her.
"We'll get through this, hun," he whispered, knowing what was on her mind. "We both know the medication, as rough as it is right now to deal with the adjustment, is needed for now."
"I know," she sighed heavily. "It's just…"
"You wish this hadn't happened," he finished for her.
"Exactly. I am just so glad you are taking the job with Doctor Brackett," she admitted.
Smiling slightly, Roy admitted, "After what happened to Johnny here, there is no way I could go back to what I did full-time. I could never put myself in the position for something like this to happen to me after seeing how much it affects us trying to help Johnny through this."
"Thank you," she whispered
"Welcome," he replied.
Gathering their strength, the two of them went in to help Davis and Scarlett with Johnny's physical and occupational therapy before lunch. While doing so, Roy explained to Johnny what they had learned from Karl and Joe about how the new medication he was on was making him feel odd. Jo picked up at that point and said that although things might be harder for a while, once he got used to the medication, things would get easier again.
John just looked at them skeptically, wondering, Why should I believe them? First, they say I am doing good and will do more good as time passes. Then, I get more pills that make me feel bad and make things worse. Why should I believe?
Unfortunately, even though all four of the adults in the room saw the look Johnny gave them, none of them were quite sure what it meant. John refused to tell them, but after the discussion with Doctor Druthers, they all felt that perhaps Johnny just wasn't sure of how to respond or they weren't wording the question the right way. So as not to upset him, they just let it alone, causing Johnny to become more suspicious of their actions.
Things continued on like this for the next four days, with Johnny speaking little unless it was a direct question about how something felt. Inside, however, a rage was building that even Doctor Druthers didn't detect. Johnny himself really didn't understand it himself either. All he was aware of was the fact that in the middle of his chest, a hot fire was burning and each passing day, it grew hotter and bigger. Finally, on the fourth day when Joanne came with breakfast and Roy tried to wake him up, Johnny couldn't stop himself.
"LEAVE ME 'LONE! JUST LIKE THEM! TELL ME WHAT, WHEN, HOW TO DO! TIRED! WANNA GO HOME! HATE HERE!" he screamed at them, panting heavily from waking up abruptly.
Taken back, Roy motioned Jo to get help. Right then, he was just thankful Johnny was ranting and not trying to escape or take a swing at him. Despite every effort to calm him down, nothing seemed to work and his screaming seeming to go on forever. Within a few minutes though, Johnny was exhausted and out of breath, too tired to go on.
"Hate here," John mumbled, trying to keep his eyes open. "Mean…home…"
"Shh, it's okay," Roy soothed him, gently rubbing his arm despite the fact Johnny had at first yanked it back. "Just rest, ok Junior?"
As he was taking his vitals, Karl and Joe came into the room with Joanne close behind. Puzzlement crossed their faces when they saw John sleeping.
"What happened?" Joe whispered.
"I tried to wake him up for breakfast and well…" Roy threw his hand up. "He kind of just exploded. Started yelling about hating it here, wanting to go home, wanting to be left alone, how we are just like them, although I am not sure who they are. He was almost hyperventilating, but wasn't trying to fight or anything. Just yelling."
"Sounds like he reached a breaking point," Karl suggested. "I wouldn't be too surprised and honestly, I have been surprised at how well he has been doing. I thought perhaps he was hiding things, but each time I would observe how he was with you and your family, he seemed even more relaxed. I just assumed he was coping and despite the memory problems, still had a sense of the bond with you Roy."
Sighing heavily, Roy shrugged, "Who knows? Maybe he was coping until he got on this new med? Could that be it?"
Thinking on it, Doctor Druthers slowly shook his head, "I don't think so. I've assessed him each night and his moods have been leveling out."
"Wait, I'm confused," Joanne held up a hand. "You're talking about mood stabilizing and coping like they're two different things? Aren't they the same? I mean, it makes no sense to be able to cope well if your mood isn't stabilized, at least to me."
"Actually, they are two different areas. Think of those with manic depression. It takes a lot to level out their moods. Yet, even when their moods aren't stable or level, they can have enough skills to cope with their disorder and situation. That is more or less what is going on here," Karl explained.
"So, you thought he was dealing with the situation fairly well, even though he would become depressed or get angry quickly for no reason?" she clarified.
"Yes, although the reason is likely due to the brain injury."
Sighing, she asked, "So, what set this off?"
"It could be a number of things, but I think right now, Johnny is simply overwhelmed by the sound of it. If I had to guess, he is also relating how he was treated at the ranch to how he is treated here," Dr. Druthers said. "Right now, for his mental health, I would like to allow him to just sleep. When he wakes up, I'll speak with him and try to determine what happened. What happens after that will depend on what I find out, alright?"
Nodding, Roy and Joanne looked to Joe for his opinion on how Johnny was doing.
"I don't see any ill effects from the outburst," he assured him. "Why don't you two go somewhere for breakfast, take a break? I have a feeling it will be a bit before Johnny is awake."
Hesitating, Joe encouraged them, "We really have been working with Johnny a lot to make sure he continues recovering well. This was probably his way of saying he needed a break. And if he needs a break, than you two must as well."
"Alright," Jo reluctantly said. "We'll go home for a while, but call if you need us. Otherwise, we'll come back around lunchtime with something for him to eat."
"Sounds great," Joe smiled at them as he and Karl herded them towards the door. "I'll see you guys later on."
"Thank you," Joanne gratefully said as she led her husband to the elevator, knowing it was difficult to leave Johnny behind. It was difficult for her as well, but she knew the doctors and nurses would pay extra attention to Johnny while they were gone and quite honestly, she knew they could both use a break as the time towards John's release date grew closer.