Hey Guys! New chapter! I don't have very much to say today before the chapter starts except that I may or may not be posting next week because of exams. Hopefully this can hold you all off until then.
Phoebe's POV
Present time
"You called my aunt?" I nearly shout, not daring to even look her way.
"Phoebe, why don't you have a seat." Dr. Heart says. She and my aunt are sitting at the couches in the far corner of her room that all face in towards each other. If I sat down I'd have no choice but to look into the face of the woman who abandoned me.
"No," I snap. "I'm not going to sit down. I'm not going to do anything with her here."
"Come on Bee." Nurse Jackson attempts to gently take my arm and lead me over but I yank it away.
"No!" I don't yell, I just say loudly and forcefully. That same crazed feeling I had yesterday begins to overtake me once more and I can't stop shaking my head as I back up further and further until my back is against the door once more. I don't take my eyes off of Nurse Jackson until I'm sure my hand has found the doorknob. Quickly I whip around and try and force the door open.
"Let me out!" I shout, when I can't get the knob to turn the right way. I bang on the door before screaming again. "Let me out!" Nurse Jackson rushes over before taking my hands and walking me over to where Dr. Heart and Tante Tess are seated.
Tante Tess has this look of shock smeared across her face and I glare at her. I want to spit some nasty splew of words at her but I'm so angry and so upset I lack the ability to form coherent sentences. Nurse Jackson sits down on one of the too soft couches, pulling me down with her.
"Phoebe," My aunt mumbles quietly. "What happened?" Again I want to scoff or do something just to show my discontent but I'm at a loss for something to say.
"Bee, I didn't mean to put you on the spot like this but if you would have known you wouldn't have come." Dr. Heart speaks softly in the fake tone she uses when she's trying to come across as a nice little therapist, oh wait I'm sorry, psychiatrist.
"Damn right I wouldn't have." I mutter crossing my arms. My mouth decides to actually begin working. I groan, "Can I please leave?" I ask already knowing the answer.
"No Bee." Dr. Heart replies, our daily conversation beginning to fill itself in.
"Well, how long do you think this will last?" I ask with a shrug. Dr. Heart and Nurse Jackson exchange glances before Nurse J places her hand on my knee.
"Bee, this is no ordinary session." She tells me gently.
"Obviously," I huff. Nurse Jackson forces a small smile before speaking again.
"There is no set time that we will be done." She says. "We will be here for as long as we need to be until we get all of the things we need to achieve done." My jaw slacks.
"You're. Joking." I state and she shakes her head. "Well it looks like we'll be here awhile because I don't plan on discussing anything with her here." I cross my arms defiantly.
"You have such a grudge against me, you know Anne used to always do the same exact thing." Tante Tess says trying to make herself sound like an involved guardian, someone who actually cares about me.
"Don't talk about her like she's dead." I snap at her before returning to my neutral position. There is a tense silence that hangs over the room before Dr. Heart talks again.
"There are some obvious, uh," She pauses trying to think of an acceptable word. "differences, between you two that I think need to be resolved in order to return to a healthy relationship once Phoebe is released."
"'Return?" I scoff. "There never was a healthy relationship to begin with! Besides what makes you think I'll be going back to live with her?" Another silence falls and my heart stalls for a few beats.
"Bee, you do remember your mother's in a coma right?" Nurse Jackson implies gently. I lower my gaze at the thought, a mixture of fear, hatred and a million other emotions intertwining together.
"I would rather die than go back to live with her." I mumble and everyone gasps. I snap my eyes up giving them all a look. "Oh my God, not literally!" I exclaim. Try to jump off a roof once and everyone changes how they take average teenage exclamations.
"Let's talk about why you think that way." Dr, Heart suggests settling back in her seat with her stupid little notebook she always scribbles in. A squint at everyone sitting in this room, all waiting for my reply.
"No," I finally just say. "I've told you where I stand in this situation and I refuse to negotiate. If you want to talk so badly then you can find another way to do so, without her." Dr. Heart sighs.
"The whole point of this session was to have you two interact in a controlled setting, fulfilling your demand would be a step in the other direction of what we want to achieve." She tries to persuade me but I just laugh.
"Well I don't know who's dumb idea it was to even put us in the same room together. I really thought you all would know me better than that by now." Another scoff escapes from my lips. I can sense their uneasiness, they don't know what to say.
"Bee, is there anything else we can get you to make you feel more comfortable?" Nurse Jackson clears her throat. "We just want you to relax, is there anything we can do to help?" I pause for a minute considering my options before it comes to me.
"I want to see Jordi." I declare.
Jordi's POV
We have all filed out into the waiting room down the hall from Dr. Heart's office. Every once in a while it's almost like I can hear Bee's voice rise as if she's shouting. Words can't describe how concerned I am.
I haven't been able to sit still this entire time. I've paced back and forth for so long I feel like I'm trapped in a whirlpool and I'll never be able to stop. Out of the corner of my eye I see Dr. McAndrew walking briskly in our direction. Suddenly it's like the swift movement of the whirlpool stops abruptly and now I'm underwater, unable to catch my breath.
Dr. McAndrew makes direct eye contact with me. "Jordi," He states calmly but I can tell there is an edge to his voice. "Bee's asking for you."
I follow him quickly down the hallway, I see Bee pacing back and forth just like I had been doing a few feet ahead of us. My anxieties pick up as I watch her, it is obvious she's upset. The forced stone look smeared across her face is breaking at the edges.
"Now remember Jordi," Dr McAndrew whispers so that only I can hear him. "This is her battle, not yours. Be a friend but don't be a crutch."
We have approached where Bee is pacing outside of Dr. Heart's office and she stops, a look of relief flooding over her face when she sees me.
"I'll leave you two to your business but Bee don't stall for too long." He gives her a stern look before turning and leaving us alone. I turn to face Bee and see her shaking, her face a mess of emotions trying to escape. I throw my arms around her and squeeze her into me tight. I feel her body collapse as everything she's forced back releases and she sobs into my chest.
"They brought my aunt here." She says between whimpers. I pull her in closer. With one hand I run my fingers through her hair and trace her back softly.
"I know Bee, it okay." At this she cries harder and I regret saying anything.
"I don't want to go back in there Jordi." She begs me. "Can we please go to the creek? Or go watch a movie or eat ice cream?" She pleads.
"No, no Cariño." I whisper into her hair. "You need to do this." She pulls away from my embrace glaring up at me.
"I thought you were on my side for this!" She stutters, still off guard from her break down.
"I am Bee. I care about you, a lot. You need to get better." I try and reach out to stroke her face but she steps aside.
"Well maybe I don't want to get better!" She snaps. "Maybe I want to stay in this stupid hospital forever and wake up every morning to you. Maybe I never want to go back to living the nightmare that is my life, maybe I just want to leave it all behind! You say you care about me, well why don't you care about what I want?" She shakes her head turning away from me.
"Because Bee," I reach out to grab her arms and turn her to face me. "Because sometimes what you want isn't what you need." I stare down into her blue gray eyes. They shone so bright when she first got here, now they're lackluster and seem so cold. The only other time I've seen them light up is when -
I can't help it I'm desperate. I cup her face in my hands and softly bring my lips to her cold ones. Slowly I feel as she warms back up. She's tentative as she kisses me back, almost as if she is being awaken from a daze she was in. Her hands slowly raise up and soon they are on the back of my head, intertwining into my hair, pulling me deeper into the kiss. I can't remember the last time we connected like this. Maybe we never really have.
She pulls away first, careful to make sure to leave the kiss lingering and I know the real Bee is back. I try to preserve the last of the kiss before I open my eyes and look down at her now vibrant jewels.
"Well Mr. Palacios," she says with a flirty smirk. "You sure know how to get the girl." She let's out a soft chuckle. I can't keep my face from breaking out into a smile.
"Better?" I ask a little more serious and she nods.
"Better." She sighs turning around to look at Dr. Heart's door, letting out a soft huff. I step up behind her, wrapping my arms around her waist and burying my face in her neck.
"You can do this, you know?" I whisper pecking soft kisses along her neck up to her cheek. She sighs.
"I don't know Jordi. I just," she shrugs. "I can't exactly put my feelings into words and that's what they're wanting me to do."
"What if you didn't have to put them into words?" I ask an idea forming in my mind.
"Jordi come on, this is therapy for Pete's Sake. Aka lie on a couch and TALK about your problems." She laughs softly.
"True," I blush. "I probably shouldn't suggest this but would it be better if I went in with
you?" She ponders this silent before sighing again.
"Honestly, as much as I don't want you to leave me with my crazy aunt, I don't know how much it'll help." She giggles. "A good distraction for sure but it won't make me want to face my demons."
"I don't think the best gift in the world could make someone more willing to face their demons. But I will support you in this. I'm not going anywhere." We are both silent for a moment. Slowly Bee raises one hand to the doorknob, taking a tight a hold of mine with her other hand. She lets out a shaky breath before cracking the door open.
I hope you guys liked this update! Special shout outs to catluver9999 , xoElle23 , WickedlyMalovent , and Devon. I loved hearing about all of your summer plans. I actually live near Cincinnati so I will probably be going to King's Island a lot this summer with my friends. Also in June I am going to the Dominican Republic with my family for vacation!
Today's QOTC is: How do you deal with school stress? For me it is probably by taking a nap or writing. So basically procrastination lol!
Keep reviewing! I promise there is a lot more in store for Bee!
Lots of Love - Britt