A/N: Thank you so much for sticking with me. Your words on the last chapter were lovely and inspiring. Enjoy.

And For You

"And for you, I would bury your burdens deep in the marrow of my bones; just to rid you of any pain you have known. Even if the agony makes me want to scream my heart raw, I will swallow it whole so you think of it no more."

-Natalie Jensen

Her back hits the nearest wall of the cabin with a quiet thump, at least that's how she imagines it would be if she wasn't injured.

Instead, Castle's hands gently grip her waist, steadying her balance as she slowly eases back until her back lightly rests against the wood, so much less desperate than she expected their first kiss would be when they finally gave in to each other.

And yet, when his lips brush against hers, it's so much more, and the desperation she wanted changes to pleading.

He's tentative, cautious in a way that makes her eyes flutter closed, her eyelashes brushing both his cheek and hers. He slides one hand up to her jaw, gently cradles her cheek, and somehow, his kiss and his touch, begin to piece the broken parts of her back together.

And she wants more. Needs more.

He doesn't lose control, doesn't take more than she's giving, doesn't do anything but let his lips linger against hers before he gently pulls away, and no, that's not what she wants.

She tries to kiss him again, pushes forward to seal her lips against his again, but he gentles her urgency, drops both hands to her hips again as he eases away.

She huffs at his actions, brows furrowing as she glances up to see confliction written across the lines of his face.

Hesitancy is the last thing she expected when she ordered him to kiss her, and maybe, maybe he's changed his mind.

Maybe the timing is all wrong.

Maybe…

"Kate," he calls softly, recapturing her attention and silencing the doubt, brushing his lips over hers again just to ensure that she's with him.

"Sorry," she mumbles, teeth piercing her bottom lip as the worry lingers in the back of her mind.

"Is this really what you want?" he asks, surprising her with the bluntness of his words, even with the softness that he uses to utter them.

She unconsciously presses one of her hands over her chest, her arm trapped between them as she rubs at the aching muscles beneath her shirt.

"Why are you asking me that?" she questions, eyes searching his as she waits for an explanation.

"I just—an hour ago you could barely answer anything I asked you, and seemed pretty determined to keep me at arm's length, and now? I decide to leave you alone and give you the space that you wouldn't ask me for, but clearly wanted, and you ask me to kiss you."

He shakes his head, dropping his hands and leaving her body tingling from the warmth of his touch as he steps away from her, hiding his face in the shadows on the porch.

Something she's all too familiar with. Something she's done to him more times than she cares to admit.

"Castle, look at me," she demands, stepping around him so that she can see the way his brows furrow, like he wants to be stubborn and do the exact opposite of her request, and yet, she doesn't give him the option.

"You've known me long enough now to know that I don't ask for something unless I want it," she starts, arching a brow at him until he nods, acknowledging that it's the truth.

"You nearly took a bullet for me after pulling me out of a hangar where my life would've definitely ended, and then, you told me you loved me as I was gasping for breath, unable to say anything as the life drained out of me. You came here determined to not let me do this alone and have poured your heart out to me more than once. And you really think that I don't want this? That I'm going to let you walk away after all of that?"

She pauses to force a deep, painful breath of air into her lungs, vehemently shaking her head as she reaches for his hand, tangling her fingers with his.

"I may be stubborn, and frustrating, and ridiculous, but I'm not stupid," she huffs, attempting to coax a smile from him, squeezing his hand when he offers her a slight upturn of his lips.

"I'm not promising easy, nothing between us ever has been…"

"That's not completely true," Castle interrupts, releasing her hand in favor of wrapping his arms around her again, brushing his lips over hers when she arches a brow in question.

"This…" he murmurs against her lips, lingering for another moment for emphasis. "This part is going to be a breeze…"

She grins at his words, humming her agreement before gently easing back so that she can see his eyes.

"You are what I want," she assures him, wincing when a sudden wave of pain has a breathtaking ache blooming out across her chest.

Castle shifts his hold on her, wrapping his good arm around her waist, ensuring that she keeps her balance as he turns them towards the door, brows furrowed in concern at the look on her face.

By the time he gets her to the couch, helping her to ease down against the cushions, her face is completely drained of color, her breaths short and sharp as the pain increases.

"Let me get you a pain pill, it's been too long since you've had one," he murmurs softly, squeezing her hand before leaving here there only long enough to collect her pills and a bottle of water, returning to kneel in front of her.

He places one of the pills in her palm and hands her the open bottle, rubbing soothing circles over both of her knees until she hands him the bottle back, closing her eyes against another wave of pain.

The silence lingers as her breaths slowly regulate again, a bit of her color returning as she relaxes against the cushions of the couch, and Castle slides one of his hands over hers, reminding her that he's there for whatever she needs.

Her eyes flutter open at the movement, and she brushes the fingers of her free hand over the one he still has resting on her knee.

"Staring is creepy, Castle, we've been over this before," she huffs, and he can still hear that twinge of pain in her voice, though she smirks at him, attempting to lighten the mood.

"Just trying to figure out if you're going to turn pale and almost pass out every time you confess feelings to me…" he retorts, and he's definitely teasing, but she can see the worry that creases his forehead, can read the doubts behind the reassuring blue of his eyes.

"Rick, I—" she starts, but he's already shaking his head before she can get the rest of the words out, easing off of the floor to join her on the couch.

He's careful not to jostle her, though, she looks about as uncomfortable as she could get and he's mentally brainstorming ways to ease the discomfort even as he responds to whatever apology she was about to give him.

"I was only kidding, Kate, but I'm going to be realistic here. If pursuing a relationship with you is going to put added stress on your recovery, I'm going to back off. I came here to help you through this, to hopefully talk about some of the things we've danced around, but not to push you more than you can handle."

She slips her fingers into the spaces between his, gently tugs to get him to come closer and he obliges, sliding an arm carefully around her shoulders and letting the warmth of his body seep into hers.

"I need you to push me, Castle," she murmurs, leaning into his side as the medicine finally starts to kick in, allowing her to move a little more freely without the immediate pain response.

"Look at the progress we've made since you got here. It's because you pushed when you knew that it was the only thing that was going to get us somewhere."

He can't resist pressing his lips against her temple for that, lingering when she shifts even closer.

"I'll admit that taking the risk definitely worked out this time, but Kate, I can't handle seeing you in pain, especially not when I'm the cause of it," he admits, easing his hold on her when she lifts her head so she can look at him.

"Castle, I got shot. You're going to see me in pain plenty of times if you stay here with me. It's inevitable," she explains, sliding her hand over his arm and gently squeezing to reassure him. "You don't have to worry about hurting me if you push for us. I want this. I want you. And the only thing that would hurt more than this hole in my chest at this point, would be losing you."

Of all the times he's ever imagined Kate Beckett saying that she wants him, this tops them all, his heart pounding out that familiar rhythm of love for her against the wall of his chest.

"Castle?" her voice pulls him from his thoughts back to the present, and he realizes based on the questioning look on her face, that he must have been silent for too long.

He trails his fingers down her arm, swirling soothing patterns along the visible skin that's not hidden beneath her sleeve, smirking at the goosebumps that freckle there in wake of his touch.

"Sorry," he murmurs, finding her eyes with the reassurance of his own, keeping her close. "Not used to you being so open, keeps catching me off guard," he explains, brushing his lips to her cheek in a silent thank you.

Her huff of annoyance drifts across his neck when she presses her face there, and he lifts his fingers to her neck, gently massages the tense muscles there.

"It's okay, Kate."

"No, it's not," she grumbles, tilting her head to look up at him. "You deserve so much more than what I've given you over the years. I've been selfish because…"

"Because you needed to be," he interrupts, keeping his fingers at her neck.

She frowns at that, bites at her bottom lip before answering. "Maybe that's true, but I know I hurt you in the process and that was never what I wanted. If I…"

"Kate," he interrupts again, sliding his hand around to her jaw, brushing his thumb over her lips, erasing the what if's that are still ready to burst out.

"No more what if's. No more apologies. Look where we are right now…do I look hurt or unhappy?" he asks, feathering his fingers at her jaw, pressing his grin to the corner of her mouth before he pulls back to allow her to answer.

She softens at that, letting his reassurance wash through her, but a little more never hurt anyone.

"I'm not sure I'm getting an accurate reading," she murmurs softly, attempting to hide the smirk flirting at the edges of her lips. "Perhaps there's something you could do to convince me completely…"

He's already leaning in, grinning like he's just received the best gift ever, and the way he presses his lips to hers says it all.

TBC