Chapter Forty Six

Jasper

I looked in horror at the spreading black bruise on Bella's back just above her hip bone, had I been responsible for that? She turned around and looked at me with eyes full of love and something else…..understanding that she was now truly mine as I was hers.

"What's wrong Jasper?"

She sat up suddenly looking alarmed and for a fleeting second I thought she was afraid of me but then she held out her arms to pull me in but I saw the wince of pain and felt a terrible guilt.

Bella

I woke wondering if the last few hours had been a wonderful if highly erotic dream but there he was. So why did he look so shocked and disgusted? Did he realize he'd just made a terrible mistake sleeping with me? I couldn't, wouldn't believe that.

"What's wrong Jazz? Did I do something wrong? If so I'm sorry but please don't look at me like that."

He touched my cheek with one trembling hand but this time it wasn't from a struggle to maintain control, this time was different, I could see hurt and guilt in his golden eyes,

"Bella I am so very sorry, you must be terrified."

I shook my head,

"Jasper you warned me and I forgot, you didn't hurt me deliberately, it was an accident so stop beating yourself up over it. I love you."

Jasper

I pulled her close again relieved beyond measure by her attitude and understanding, she truly was my mate but she still deserved an explanation as to why I acted as I had.

"Its very hard for a non vampire to understand the need that drives us Bella. We are ruled in the main by our desires, to drink blood, to take our mate and mark herb ours, to defend what we own. I learned over the years to control most of these urges, like drinking animal blood and not human but it's hard, very hard, and the most intense of all is the mating urge. A vampire's mate is the single most important thing in his or her life and no one and nothing will ever be allowed to come between them.

"I understand that Jasper, really I do."

"I know you don't understand why it was so difficult for me, why I was shaking with the effort of controlling myself even a little. You know we are virtually indestructible and vampire sex can be very rough, too rough for a human to withstand so I had to control myself just enough not to hurt you although it seems I failed in that, thank God it wasn't more serious. I couldn't mark you the way a vampire marks their mate and that was frustrating but now I promise you I will be able to control myself and you will never be harmed again, not by me or anyone else."

Bella

I was intrigued by one thing he said,

"Tell me how a vampire usually marks his or her mate."

He shook his head,

"It isn't important Bella, at least not for now."

"It is to me, please Jasper."

He looked away as if ashamed then touched a particularly nasty scar on his neck,

"Maria did that, she convinced me she was my mate, that she loved me, and she made her mark. I wish it were possible to rid myself of it, an everlasting reminder of my own stupidity."

I touched it, feeling several ridges almost on top of each other.

"Every time I displeased her she would remind me she was my mate and I was wrong to disobey her. This scar is a mark of ownership not of a mate but it took me many years to understand that. But you see why I couldn't mark you and that frustrated me even more."

"But everyone will know we're mates now?"

He nodded,

"Oh yes, there will be no doubt, my scent is all over you and inside you Bella, I marked you as my property, my mate, a warning to any other vampire to keep his distance."

"And if he doesn't?"

"He's dead, no warning, no exceptions."

His face was deadly serious as he said this and I was only too aware that I carried a great responsibility, to ensure I never put another male at risk by my own actions, and that included Jay, especially Jay. He was the biggest threat as far as Jasper was concerned and I wondered if Jay had marked Alice as his…...or if Jasper had done so feeling a terrible sense of jealousy at this thought. Jasper was mine, no one else's and any female who took liberties would find themselves answerable to me.

"Jasper?"

"Yes my love"

"Come here."

I pulled him close determined this time to make sure I was fully involved in our love making, no more submissive Bella, not any more! As I pulled him close threading my fingers through his hair to keep him there he hesitated and I knew it was the thought of my back that was worrying him so I pulled away just far enough to look into his face,

"You listen to me Mister, what happened was an accident nothing more and now it's my turn. If it hurts I'll soon let you know, OK?"

He looked a little sad as he whispered,

"Sleep darlin', you look exhausted."

I hadn't felt exhausted until he said that but then suddenly I could hardly keep my eyes open and I collapsed back to the bed still holding on to his hair pulling him with me and then everything went black as I drifted off.

Jasper

I couldn't, I just couldn't hurt Bella and I would feel her pain much as she would deny it so I sent her to sleep but I knew that was no answer, just a temporary solution and she would be angry with me once she found out what I'd done to her. Once she was out of pain fine, we could explore each other all she wanted but not until, I couldn't, I wouldn't do that. Once I had her deeply under I caressed her cheek then climbed out of bed feeling so different, so light and more alive than I ever had. I was finally complete, I had my mate and she was mine alone. I showered hurriedly although reluctant to wash her scent from my body, still it would be there again soon enough.

Picking up my cell phone I rang Darius,

"Hey Major, you took your time, I was beginning to think you might need a little guidance there."

"Very funny, any news yet?"

"Not much no but something is stirring."

"Like what?"

"A contingent of the Volturi guard is about to leave for the States. Now it could be a coincidence but they make me nervous."

"Me too, you think they've sent Demetrei to find Bella?"

"It's possible, probable even but as its Caius and we know he wanted Maria to assassinate you they could have a dual mission. Either way I think we need to come up with some kind of plan."

"I need time Darius, time to bond with Bella."

"I can give you some, even Demetri isn't infallible. But remember you only have a couple of months left before Maria is supposed to hand the double over to Caius so whatever you need to do better be done pronto."

"I know but do what you can."

"How's Bella? I heard a scream and nearly came back but then nothing."

"She's OK, I lost it for a second and she got bruised but she's fine. I thought I'd let her sleep a while, she's exhausted,

"I'll bet! And you mean you sent her to sleep, you know using that little trick will get you in deep trouble if you're not careful"

"I know, I just want her to recover that's all. I'll speak to you in a while."

"OK, I'll pass on the good news to the others, Peter's been pestering me every half hour for an update, now maybe he'll shut the fuck up."